Five years later...

"Faglio, you need to learn to forgive. Forgive all those that hurt you just as Christ Jesus forgave you all your sins," the senior pastor advised with soft and understanding eyes as his hand rested on my defeated shoulders.

The church was dispersed of all its members except for the workers who kept to themselves as they quietly and swiftly organised the chairs to their original state.

"All those that have hurt me, do not deserve forgiveness, they have hurt me far beyond measure," I explained as my eyes brimmed with unshed tears threatening to trickle down my cheeks without hesitation.

"Figlio, how do you expect the Creator of the universe to forgive you if you fail to forgive others?"

I mean, it made sense. I had been forgiven by the Lord, not because I deserved or was worthy of forgiveness but because He loved me so, something that had taken me years to comprehend.

It was not by my own actions that I had been saved but I had been saved by grace offered freely by my Father through His Son Jesus Christ.

"I hear you sir but I need time. I simply cannot forgive and forget, I've lost way too much."

"You lose nothing by forgiving son but you gain peace through it, think about it," and that put my mind in disarray as he laid a soft tap on my back.

"Fratello, I'm ready to go. My friends have left," Avelina bounced off, her pigtails swinging from left to right.

Over the past few years, she had grown into a beautiful and loving young girl. She had been through a spiral of emotions, from joy to sadness when she left and hers and everyone's emotions took a three-hundred and sixty degree turn.

"Okay, Cara. Let's leave," I took hold of her dainty hand pulling her towards the exit. "Where is your uncle Giovanni?"

"Uncle is taking with a beautiful girl outside, she has curly hair and brown skin like big Sorella..." she trailed off looking at one of her friends waving her on as she scurried along to her without permission, not realising the gravity of what she had just said.

Big Sorella, was her. But how? There was only a handful of people of colour in the city. Let alone as breath-taking as SHE was.

But true to my little sisters' words, a woman with her back turned towards me stood talking to a flustered Giovanni. She had her braids, her height, and her smooth skin. Her modest dressing.

My legs stayed glued to the ground as my heart thudded in my heart, almost as though it was about to give out on me but the only thought that would come to mind; COULD IT BE HER? HAD SHE COME BACK TO ME?

Slowly and carefully, I approached her, my eyes on the girl before me. I was filled with anticipation yet apprehension. What a paradox.

But before I could reach her she turned around and like that fateful night many years ago, my hopes and heart were crushed. She wasn't HER, no one could compare with her. She did not have baby hairs, her eyes did not light up the room like diamonds in the moonlight. Her lips were not plump yet small and rosy. Her eyes were not soft with unbelievable kindness.

My mind took me to a time that I would've much rather forgotten.

                << FLASHBACK >>

"Stay away from me," and my world tore apart.

"Amore? What do you mean? I'm here for you," I tried reaching out to her, only for her to flinch away from me as though my touch had burnt her. If I wasn't hurt before, I was now.

"Leave. I don't want you anywhere near me," I could not make out her facial expression but I could hear the trace of venom in her voice.

"Why?" My voice cracked revealing how broken my heart was.

"Because you Antonio D'Angelo are the biggest liar and deceiver I have ever seen. I trusted you more than I trusted myself. I lost myself for you. I lost my faith for you. I lost my friend for you but what did you do?" she spoke between sobs and I knew that our love might've just been over.

She had found out about my true identity even before I had gotten the chance to tell her myself. She was meant to hear the truth from me.

"I'm sorry," was all I had managed to as tears started welling up in my eyes. In the back of my mind, I knew that this was it. There was no coming back from this.

"It's too late, Antonio. I'm done. We're done. Antonio a relationship is built on trust and not lies. And unfortunately, this is not love but lies upon lies. I cannot be with someone like that," she whispered out the last part, drawing a sharp knife and slicing my heart open with her words.

"No, no amore, this cannot be it, please. I promise to explain everything, but please do not leave me," and for the first time in my life, I got on both my knees with my hands folded as I pleaded with the one my heart yearned for and could not live without.

She was like air to my lungs.

"Antonio," she sucked in a breath. "Please do not make this any more difficult than it already is. You murder people for a living, you rob people for a living. Your best friend is a gun and you know what they say, you live by the gun, you die by the gun. I don't want to suffer anymore than I already have and if you love me as much as you claim to then you will leave me alone," she pulled me away from herself even under the restriction from the rope on her hands.

"No." I stood up, wiping every trace of tears on my cheeks as I worked on the ropes on her hands and legs. She winced as I pulled them off and I rubbed them softly to help with the blood circulation.

"What do you mean no?" she sassed up on me, abruptly standing up only for a whiplash to send her tumbling down into my arms. She relaxed momentarily before pushing herself out of my grasp.

"Do you wish to die here, Destiny?" she knew that I meant business by the tone of my voice.

I noticed her pouting like a baby before uttering an almost inaudible, "No."

That excuse of a man had really strapped a bomb on her and I worked on defusing it with great difficulty till I remembered what Mark had told me and executed the plan, crossing my fingers in hopes that both Destiny and I would leave safely. And thankfully nothing happened; it stopped timing. I carefully removed it from Destiny's body.

"Let's go," I said taking a hold of her hand and this time she did not push me away, thinking that somehow I had made some progress. But I knew that once Destiny had made up her mind there was no turning it.

We stealthily sneaked out of the house, unnoticed and I was grateful that Destiny had been oblivious to the men sprilled on the floor because of me; no need to add fuel to the fire.

Once we had reached the safety of my bulletproof car, we caught our breath, only to find Giovanni in the backseat, "Hey, lovebirds. I see that you were able to get cosy up there."

"Where were you? I thought that I had left you," I asked trying to alleviate the tension that was in the car between Destiny and I.

"Oh, I figured that you had found her so I came back here," he said casually as he sipped on the orange juice he had decided to bring here after he called the mission a "Stakeout."

"Oh, hi Des," he waved at her but when she did not reply he was not only bewildered but sad but decided not to poke and probe.

"Let's go home," I pulled the car into ignition.

"I'm going nowhere!" Destiny asserted as she tried to pry the door open but thankfully, I had locked the doors so she had no choice but to stay seated.

"How are you?" I tried asking her but like Giovanni, she ignored me.

Giovanni gave me a worried stare in the rearview window which I caught with a look that said I would tell him everything later.

We finally reached the house and had to pull her in with me and under the bright lights I was able to make out her features; her hair was sticking to her face, her mouth was dry and streaks of tears marked her cheeks and this was all because of me.

"I will walk you to your room so that you can freshen up," I said as this time she did not protest and tire-filled her eyes and she obliged to my wishes.

We reached her room and just as she walked up to the adjoining bathroom, I pulled her down on the bed that I was seated on.

"I'm sorry," I said as tears fell down her cheeks like a fountain, further breaking my heart.

"I'm sorry for lying to you, but know that I love you more than the word itself. I love you, Destiny. Please find it in your heart to forgive me," I pleaded.

"I just need time, can you give me that?" she asked and if that was all she needed I would grant her wishes.

"Okay, anything you ask for, I will give you," I said rubbing her soft hand with my own.

"Thank you," she whispered, her honey orbs looking at me as if to memorise me before she left me.

Literally.

The following morning, she wasn't in her room but there was a letter on her bed. At first, I was panicked, thinking Izan had returned; he had already escaped by the time we got to the building but relaxed when I saw her handwriting.

I sat on her bed, contemplating on reading it, knowing that the contents of the letter would break me.

DEAR ANTONIO

ANTONIO, I GAVE YOU MY HEART ON A SILVER PLATTER. I DEDICATED MY ENTIRE BEING TO YOU, FORSAKING ALL OTHERS.

BUT IT'S TRUE RIGHT, THE ONE'S YOU LOVE MOST WILL HURT YOU MORE.

ANTONIO, YOU HAVE BROKEN MY HEART INTO TWO AND I DON'T THINK THAT IT CAN EVER BE MENDED.

I LOOKED PAST YOUR LACK OF FAITH, I LOOKED PAST YOUR WAYS AND SAW YOUR HEART AND RAN AFTER IT BUT IT WAS ALL IN VAIN.

YOU WERE KILLING PEOPLE BEHIND MY BACK, YOU WERE LYING STRAIGHT TO MY FACE WITHOUT ANY REGRET.

I FEEL BETRAYED AND I DON'T KNOW HOW I CAN GET PAST THAT.

AND THAT IS WHY, I HAVE DECIDED TO LEAVE. LEAVE YOU AND EVERYTHING WE EVER HAD BEHIND.

IF I STAY WITH YOU, I WOULD BE DYING A SILENT DEATH EACH DAY AND I CANNOT GO THROUGH THAT.

I LOVE YOU, ANTONIO BUT WE WERE JUST NOT MEANT TO BE. YOU WILL FIND SOMEONE ELSE, SOMEONE WHO WILL LOVE YOU FOR WHO YOU ARE BECAUSE I SIMPLY CANNOT.

I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST AND I HOPE YOU FIND CHRIST FOR MONEY IS IN VAIN BUT FAITH IN HIM IS ETERNAL.

BY THE TIME YOU SEE THIS LETTER, I WILL BE LONG GONE. PLEASE DON'T COME LOOKING FOR ME.

YOURS SINCERELY

DESTINY.

         << END OF FLASHBACK >>

And ever since, I had not seen her but no moment passed without thoughts of her and what we had coming to mind.

I had tried making alcohol my refuge but everytime I brought it close to my lips, it was as I could hear her whipering, "Be not drunk by alcohol but be drunk by the spirit." And that's when I started going to church with Giovanni's encouragement in pursuit of this spirit and when I encountered the Spirit there, my life changed for the better. I knew who Christ was, and I let go of my past life.

Finding forgiveness was not easy. I thought I desevered to go to hell, I deserved to suffer for all of eternity for hurting so many people but in my relationship with Him, I learnt that He is more than just God, He is a Father, a Lover, a Best Friend, and He is filled with tender-mercies and forgives when one sincerely repents.

I had let go of any possession and position I had in the mafia and I was an entrepreneur, going to class religiously and reading my Bible as a form of refuge.

As I pulled out of my reverie Giovanni gave me a sympathetic glance as the girl left.

And the last thing I expected from him came out of his mouth, "Do you want Destiny?"

"With all of my being," I replied honestly.

"Then, let's go get her. And don't even say no, she loves you and you love her. Go get the one you love."

"You're right," I said determination seeping into my voice.

"South Africa, here we come!"