May 17, 2052

"John!  You need to stop shutting yourself in your room!  There is a whole world you're missing out on!"

"No!  I'm not missing out on anything.  Everything I care about isn't in your world, it's in the world Mom showed me." John turned away, anger and sadness coursing through him. 

Jeff gave a sigh, as he often did when talking to his second son. "John, there's more to life than just the stars..."

John turned back to his father. "No, life is the stars!  If Mom were here, she would agree with me.  But she's not.  Thanks to him." John glared at his youngest brother, the five-year old Alan.

Alan just stood there, looking away from John.  He had since lost the wish to interact with the red-head.

"John, seriously, it's time for you to grow up!  Quit taking it out on Alan; it's not his fault!"

"Yes, it is!  He killed her!" John exclaimed, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.

"John, really?!" Jeff exclaimed, but his son had already turned and was dashing away up the steps.

Jeff and his sons watched him leave, running away to his room.

When the thundering of the fourteen-year-old's footsteps died, Alan burst into tears, clutching Gordon's leg.  The eleven-year-old looked for help while he stroked his brother's bleach-blond hair.

Scott looked in the direction of John's room.  He didn't know how he could break through to him, but he had to find a way.

Footsteps coming from the stairwell that led down to the kitchen broke everyone from their thoughts.  They all watched as Grandma Tracy entered the room.

"Jeff, the GDF wish to speak to you," she told him.

Jeff sighed.  "Alright, everyone out," he said as he made his way to his desk.

His sons all filed out of the room, heading in different directions.  He watched them leave, before pulling up the hologram that awaited him.

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John sat in his room, feeling dead inside.  It wasn't a sensation he wasn't used to.  For the last almost six years he felt like that.  Like nothing mattered.  Like all was lost.  He felt lost.

The only time his life seemed to take on some meaning, some little bit of happiness, was when the stars were out.  Oh, how he wished he could get lost in the stars forever.  Alone.  Surrounded entirely by the mystery of space.

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"I'm bored!"

"Alan, just watch the movie."

"But this one is soooo boring!  And I've seen it a bazillion times!"

"We haven't watched Episode I in forever!" Gordon exclaimed.

"It's just about that race thing!  Nothing else happens..."

"Plenty else happens!  How could you-"

Jeff cut off his son, "Gordon, just drop it.  Alan, you can go to bed."

"Yay!" Alan jumped off the leather couch and ran out of the theatre room.

Of course, it wasn't bed time yet.  He ran downstairs to the area where his Dad worked, before walking out onto the concrete deck that over-looked the pool.

He stared up at the sky, the stars twinkling, winking down at him.  He giggled.  He found the few he knew and pointed them out, being sure all the wildlife of their little island knew where Betelgeuse and Sirius were.

Alan leaped around, telling the sky which of its stars he liked better, and asking it why its stars could only be seen at night. 

As Alan was busy dancing around in the moonlight, he didn't notice someone else had joined him.

A voice brought him out of his thoughts.  "How many do you know?"

Alan stumbled backwards.  The voice, although quiet, had startled him.  He looked towards it and saw John, his fourteen-year-old brother who wished him death everytime he laid eyes on him.

Fear in his eyes, Alan stepped away from him.  "W-what are you doing out here?"

John was immediately hurt by his little brother's reaction, and already he was regretting his decision to come over here.  However, Alan had sparked his interest when he had blatantly asked the sky why it refused to show its stars during the day.  Such a simple, foolish question would have normally given John more reason to hate his brother, but for some reason, it was more intriguing him why Alan was asking the question. 

The more he thought about it, the more he couldn't believe he was over here, engaging his youngest brother in conversation, and the more he wanted to turn away and shut himself out again.  The sharpness in his voice began to return as he moved to walk away.  "None of your business."

John took a few steps, fully intending to leave and never again speak to the five-year-old, but he was stopped in his tracks when said five-year-old asked the next question.

"How many do you know?"

John, fully taken aback by his brother's voice and the wonder in it, didn't reply.  He didn't even move.  The question was back.  The question that had entered his brain with every thought.  The question he had been wondering and answering for years.  The question that had never associated itself with Alan. 

Why?

For the first time, John was asking the questions, Why was Alan asking the sky this?  Why was Alan asking him this? 

For the past seven years, John had found himself needing to know everything.  Why this? And why that?

But, he had never asked the question with regards Alan.  He always just assumed Alan was this hyper, annoying, idiotic kid who was responsible for his mother's death.  It was in this moment that John finally came to his senses and realized he had never given his youngest brother a chance.

He still didn't know what was making him actually try to answer the questions, instead of just jumping to the hyper, annoying, and idiotic answers.  Perhaps it was simply because he was mentally exhausted, but John turned around and approached his brother.

Alan, surprised he had turned around, stepped back in fear, bracing himself for John to lash out.

John gently met his brother's eyes, lowering the guard he had been building up for years, and answered the question.  "A lot."

He expected pain.  Lots of it.  After all, his mother's death still felt like a fresh wound, and the guard that he had just let down was his only protection for it.

What he didn't expect was the smile that blossomed in Alan's eyes.  He also didn't expect the little boy to run at him and hug him, but he did just that, wrapping his arms around John's legs.

Surprised and totally unaccustomed to the feeling, John wasn't quite sure what to do.  But then it came back to him.  Love.  This is what his mother gave him, and this is what he refused to take in since her death, as he believed he couldn't.  When she died, he believed she had taken the love with her. 

Now, once again beneath the stars, John was experiencing it.  She was still gone, yet he was being loved.  He felt better than he had in years as realization washed over him.  Her love was gone, but that didn't mean he couldn't feel love from others. 

The realization poured down on him as he noticed his years of mistakes, and for the first time ever, he hugged his brother.  He wrapped his arms around his small body and smiled.  Perhaps he was finally taking the first steps towards healing.

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June 5, 2052

John was in his room, his window cracked open to let in the island breeze, his shades drawn down the majority of the way.

It was seven thirty in the morning, yet John had already been up for two hours.  He sat on his bed, reading a book about the Space Race that had occured almost a century ago.  The book had just been released by one of his favorite authors, and he was completely absorbed in it.

That is, untill he heard the tell-tale pounding of a young boy running down the hall.  John smiled as he heard the footsteps halt outside his door.  He clicked off the device he was reading on, and set it down on the bed, just as a familiar knock came from his door.  He smiled more before saying, "Come in."

The door burst open and Alan ran into the room.  "John!  Guess what?"

John watched as Alan hopped up onto his bed with enough energy to power a space shuttle's launch.  He laughed.  "What?"

Alan giggled.  "I said 'guess what', so you have to guess!  Otherwise I wouldn't've asked you to guess, silly!"

John chuckled.  "Okay, um, the moon's still out?"

Alan shook his head, not at all bothered that John hadn't guessed it correctly.

"Uh..." John thought of another one, "You found a meteorite!"

"No!  It's my birthday!"

"Oh, I knew that!" John exclaimed.

Alan slid off his brother's bed.  "Then how come you didn't guess it?"

"Because I wanted to see if you remembered it!"

"Of course I remembered it; it's my birthday!" Alan exclaimed as he ran out of John's room.

He ran through the hallway, waking up everyone.  Virgil ran out of his own room, his hands mimicking claws as he ran after Alan.  "Rrrraaaaarrrrrr!" He exclaimed as he chased his little brother, who squealed in delight.

Jeff, hearing his youngest barreling down the stairs swooped over and lifted him off the last step when he arrived.  "Arrgghh!  I caught 'im, Matey's!  Time to make 'im walk the plank!"

Alan screamed in surprise as his father carried him over to the glass wall.  The wall opened, letting Jeff walk out to the pool deck with Alan laughing on his shoulder.  Scott, Virgil, and Grandma Tracy followed him out.

Alan, still squealing in delight, screamed as they approached the pool.

"Oh, and look!  Shark-infested waters!" Jeff cried out, referring to the eleven-year-old who was currently training in the water.

"Nooooo!" Alan laughed as his father dangled him over the pool.

"Promise to be a good boy this year?" Jeff asked.

"Never!" Alan exclaimed.

"Oh, I don't know...," Grandma Tracy spoke, "I'd promise it.  I don't think you could survive this shark..."

"I can survive anything!"  Alan announced, pulling his feet up, away from the water, where Gordon, who had realized what was happening, was trying to grab him.

John watched from inside the house, smiling.  Although he was now building a special relationship with Alan, he was still rather afraid to approach the rest of his family.

He turned and headed back to his room to prepare Alan's present.  After years of remembering this day as the day Alan had killed their mother, and, as sick as it sounded, actually being glad of Walter's death, he wanted to make it up to him.  To all of them really, through Alan's happiness.

Over the last few weeks, John had learned that he and Alan shared a love of the stars, and that's what he wanted to build their relationship off of.  Alan was young and only knew a few of the stars.  John figured he could teach him everything their mother taught him, and more.

And what John really admired about his littlest brother was the wonder that filled his eyes when they went stargazing, and how committed Alan was to learning them all. 

However, that was about all they had in common.  They were building a special relationship, but Alan was still as hyper as ever, and often got on John's nerves.  The best part was, though, was that Alan was learning to respect that.  Everytime Alan approached John's door, he knocked.  It was a special knock that Alan created, but it was still a knock, instead of the child just barreling in unannounced.  And John loved him for it.

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"Okay, guys, clean up your dishes, and then Scott, we're going out.  John, I'll be back in a few hours to work with you."

John nodded as he placed his cake plate in the sink.  They had just done cake and presents after breakfast, and Alan was on a sugar high.  They had decided his birthday celebration would be in the morning, since Jeff had training to do with his two oldest, and work.

As the family began to disperse, John approached an excited Alan.

"John!" Alan exclaimed, throwing himself at his brother.

"Whoa!  Okay, hi."

"Hi!  Wanna play?" Alan asked, excited to try out the water guns Gordon had got him.

John chuckled nervously.  "Uh, no.  Actually, I wanted to show you something."

Alan's face lit up.  "Okay!  What do you want to show me?"

John smiled.  "Come on." He led Alan up to his room, shutting the door behind them and closing the blinds.

"Whoa, it's dark in here!" Alan exclaimed.

John gave a chuckle.  "Yeah, it's so you can see this."  He clicked on the set of projectors he had in his room, and his star map sprung to life around them.  It felt a little weird to John.  He had never shown anyone his map, he wasn't even sure if the rest of the family knew he had been making it for the past five years.

Alan's eyes went wide, his mouth hanging open in awe.  "...whoa...!"

John smiled as Alan walked around the room, taking in all the little white specks. 

"Are these stars?" Alan asked.

John nodded.

"Whoa!  Did you make this?"

John nodded again. 

"Wow..."

After a few moments, John zoomed in a bit and pointed to a star.  "Guess what this is?"

Alan looked at it, before shrugging. 

"Click on it," John suggested.

Alan clicked on the star, and an info sheet popped up.  Alan read the sheet before realizing, "That's the sun!"

John nodded, smiling.  "And then, if you click on 'view'," he clicked on it, and the map changed.

Alan looked around.  "It's the sky!"

John nodded.  "It's the view of the stars from that star you selected."

Alan gazed around in awe, before running to a different star.  He clicked on it.  "Look!  Betelgeuse!" After reading all the info on Betelgeuse, including the number of planets John had estimated rotate it, he moved on.  Soon, Alan was running around the room, memorizing new stars and constellations.

John smiled, watching this.  Maybe his life could have light in it after all.