I was halfway during my classes and let me tell you, walking by and seeing your old friends is very awkward. I would pass by the halls to get to my next class and I'd see Token walk by with Kyle and we'd make eye contact that would last for about a second and we'd both turn away in unison. It was a little funny. We had the same idea to avoid each other. I decided that during lunch I'd sneak to the goths group and ask for alcohol, but right now I had to suffer in physics

( time skip to lunch)

I was just going to start heading down with the goths after I texted them that I'd be getting some alcohol. I personally don't think I am an alcoholic, I only drink when I'm going through what most would call a "crisis". I desperately needed something to get my mind off of everything. Unfinished schoolwork, grades slipping, no friends. The list is endless.  I dashed through the halls and turned a corner when all of a sudden  I bumped into someone and heard a high pitch squeal. I looked up and it was Wendy. I panicked and got her up and she brushed her skirt off. " oh my god Wendy I am so so sorry" she giggled and took my hand. "It's okay, hey, I heard Token was having a party and I want to go." Ugh. I don't wanna hear anything about them. Just imagine going into someone's house and it's your ex-friend there and he's/she's the host and they embarrass you by not letting you in. " but Wendy, you know that we aren't on good terms, you don't even like parties" I tell her trying to convince her to not go. Of course, she protests. " you're not going for your friends, you're going for me, and you don't have to worry I'll have it all covered". I really didn't want to go at all. I'm already thinking about all of the possible directions going to the party could lead to. I seriously did not want to go, at all. I wouldn't want to come across Craig, Clyde and most certainly Kyle. Just the thought of his name gave me goosebumps and I felt a fluttering feeling in my stomach. But when I looked at Wendy's facial expression, I couldn't say no. I didn't want to hurt her feelings or have her get bored of me and leave me. "alright I'll go, but only because I love you so much" I kissed her cheek and looked into her eyes. She smiled at me, but I saw a small tint of guilt. Huh, weird. I grabbed her hand and we walked hand in hand towards to cafeteria, forgetting about the liquor.

Kyle's POV

___________________

" So my parents are going to be out for two weeks, why don't we throw an epic party guys," said Token while I simply ate my sandwich. I sat with Token, Clyde, Craig, Tweek, Jimmy, Kenny, Butters, and Fat ass. We finally left out Stan and everyone no longer cared about him except for me. I was still down for what I said but everyone had a point. Stan had been throwing us off and no matter how much I wanted Stan back with us, he was going to be a problem and throw off our plans so we had to do what was best. I miss hanging out with him. Now I feel like I'm getting closer to Cartman and it's driving me insane. He hangs out with Wendy now and only her. Ugh. I hate Cartmen but he keeps me from thinking about him. I don't know what was up with me, but I had been concealing these feelings I've had for Stan for so long. I really miss him and it's dragging me down.  We've had our times in the past where we fell off but still somehow got back together. As friends of course. This was all just too much to keep bottled. I couldn't really tell this to anyone. Mr. Mackey had gone just two weeks ago and retired from our school. He was surprisingly the counselor for elementary, junior high, and high school for quite the amount of years. Tweek and Craig were too busy wrapped around each other in their own loop so they were off the list. Cartman's an asshole. Kenny wouldn't understand and so on so forth. I had nobody to talk to with these emotions that I don't understand. I think everyone noticed I had been concerningly silent so all of their attention was on me. I didn't like that all of their eyes were on me.  I had my head down, feeling tears well up in my eyes then Cartman spoke up. " what's wrong  Jew hoe, you wish Stan was kissing you instead of Wendy?" I didn't make a smart comment at that like how I usually do and it was scaring me. I guess it must have been scaring everyone else because Token and Kenny tried to tell Cartman to shut up, but a person like Cartman won't shut up. They don't care if you're about to cry or are going through something that's mentally exhausting. People like Cartman want to see you break. He then started poking me and belittling my people. He's one of those guys who like to break you and then disintegrate you with their words and actions. They don't stop even if they hurt you, they keep going. Someone like Cartman never takes a hint. I began to shake and everyone at my table scooted away. They kept telling Cartman to stop but of course, he wouldn't listen. " you gonna cwy Kahl, huh? waaaaa, I'm a dirty Jew who has a mom that's a huge bitch and wish my Stan would come to me and not Wendy, waa im pathetic and useless". He says in an annoying squeaky voice. My voice doesn't even squeak. Usually, I would have punched him already but I didn't. I don't know why I didn't. I guess my weak body wanted to break because it was tired of being mad. It was overwhelming me and I felt like I would burst, and thats exactly what I did. All of a sudden my body took over, and the tears began to fall from my eyes and I couldn't stop them. I choked on my sobs and I cried. Everyone was silent and even Cartman. Nobody wanted to touch me, afraid that I would hit them but then Token got up and hugged me. I didn't shove him away because all I really needed was comfort at the moment and to let out what I had held for so long. I'm not allowed to cry at home. I'm supposed to be the emotionally stable one at home for Ike. My parents are stable but they don't want me breaking so I let them think I'm feeling happy. I'm so stressed, All of the college classes are wearing me down. Soon I would be taking the ACT and It was dragging me down. Every fear spilled out of my eyes and trickled down my cheeks and onto the cafeteria floor. People cry all the time at school so my breakdown wasn't anything new. I hiccuped and continued to cry. My ugly sobs were the only noise at the table. Cartman still hadn't made a noise and I'm glad for that. The last thing I want is Cartman poking fun at me. I shoved my face into Tokens shirt and he let me cry on him. I was Honestly very glad about that. He was practically the mom of our friend group. A while passed, and I had finally calmed down. Nobody still said anything and Butters handed me a tissue and I thanked him. " guys, I'm sorry I broke like that, I'm not at a good place right now" Quivering with every word I said. Token put his hands up and everyone smiled sympathetically, even Cartman. " Don't apologize, we understand. you're at a rough part right now so no need for apologizing." I smiled at Token and Jimmy pat my back. " w-wh-what y-you need k-k-kyle is a b-br-break". " you're right Jimmy, I just need to relieve myself from Stan and school." Token smiled, a wide smile in fact and sat next to me. " well...I've been waiting to throw a party at my house for a while so....what do ya say, let loose?" I wiped my tears and smiled wickedly. " Hell yeah, I'm in!" I laughed and soon we all laughed. No more tears of sadness, just of joy. Lunch ended and we all went to class. Well, finally I can let loose. I've never really let loose before. I'm excited. Token posted on his story saying that he would be throwing a party and that everyone is invited. After class was over I went home, ate and did my homework and then went to the party. I told my mom I'd be at Kenny's house and she just nodded, letting me go. I walked to Kenny's house to pick him, Butter's and Cartman up. We both brought our air horns and happily made our way to Tokens party, where we heard music blasting from a block away and crazy lights shining out through the windows.