GUSTO NITO NG GIN? Fine.

Gusto nito mapag-isa? Fine.

Yet here he was. Gusot na gusot ang mukha. Nag-aalala. Nagtatalo ang isip at damdamin niya kung tama bang pinagbigyan niya ang mga gusto ng dalaga. She shouldn't be really drinking too much.

Nasa kabilang kwarto ngayon si Renante. Matapos ihatid si Stacey sa bahay nito, napagpasyahan niyang doon na rin muna magpalipas ng gabi. Nakasampay na sa sandalan ng upuan sa dresser ang blazer ng kanyang suit. He unbuttoned the top portion of his shirt and folded its long sleeves up to his elbows. Inaayos niya ang kama nang matigilan sa ginagawa.

She's too quiet, his eyes narrowed.

Nahigit niya ang paghinga bago tinuloy ang ginagawa. "Malalaman ko rin kung ano ang pinag-usapan ninyo ni Ronnie," bulong ni Renante.

Napapiksi siya nang biglang humampas pabukas ang pinto. Alertong lumingon siya. Kahit nakita na niyang si Stacey ang naroon, binubundol pa rin ng kaba si Renante.

"Stace," he stammered at his shock as she swayed while walking inside the room.

Namumungay ang mga mata ng dalaga, pinasyal iyon saglit sa silid bago napunta iyon sa kanya.

"Renante!" lasing nitong tawag.

Oh, God.

She walked gently, barefoot. A strap of the dress she wore at the party slipped down on her arm, lowering the right side of the dress' top to an angle where the top of her breast could be slightly seen.

"Stacey," salubong niya agad sa dalaga para kunin ang bote ng gin. "Ano, hindi mo na kaya?"

"Hindi kaya? Wala akong hindi kinaya, Renante!" mayabang nitong taas-noo, muntikan pang matapilok habang pumapasok ng kwarto.

"Really?" alalay niya sa dalaga para paupuin sa gilid ng kama. Delikado na paglakad-lakarin pa ito nang gumegewang naman.

Tinabig ni Stacey ang mga kamay niya sabay tulak nito sa kanya paupo sa kama.

"May... May itatanong lang ako. Okay? Tanong lang," maingat nitong sampa sa kandungan niya. "After this... after this... tulog na... tulog na ako." She parted her legs, each fenced his sides before Stacey clung her arms around his neck.

Renante struggled to breath, feeling himself hot all over as their nearness grew closer. Naramdaman niya ang pagkiskis ng puwitan ng dalaga habang umuusog palapit sa kanya. He needed to behave real bad. Pirming hinawakan niya ito sa bewang para tumigil na ito sa pagkilos.

"If I'm... If I'm a liar, what are you here for?" mataray na sulyap ng mga mata nito sa kanya. "Are you here to spy on me? You want to make sure I am not lying about this stalker thing?"

He took in a deep breath. "Stacey, I don't think that."

"Oh, really? Then why think I am making up those things about my stalker? Nung college?"

Napatitig siya rito.

Nagluha ang mga mata nito. "Kahit... kahit ilang beses na kitang niloko? Kahit ilang beses na ako nagsinungaling sa iyo? Are you not really..." he let out a heavy sigh. "Oh, Renante!"

Hindi niya alam kung ano ang isasagot. He was in such a delicate moment. Renante didn't want to say something that would completely crush her and made her tears fall.

"I'm such a terrible person, right?" suko nito.

"Oh, no..." he murmured softly, catching her avoiding eyes. "No, you're not."

"Kaya ba... kaya ba mas gusto mo si Sondra kaysa sa akin? Dahil masama ang ugali ko?"

"Hindi masama ang ugali mo," suyo niya rito. "You are just misunderstood."

Her expectant eyes remained on him, lips quivering. He was melting with the way that Stacey was opening up herself to him now. It was something she rarely does in order to maintain her strong and independent image. Hindi niya inakala na ganitong klase ng delubyo ang hatid ng kahinaan ng dalaga. Kahit sino, mangangatog ang mga tuhod, mapupunit ang puso, panghihinaan ng loob.

But Renante needed to fight this. She was soft and vulnerable in his arms already, and he felt the need to provide the stability that she needed at this moment.

"It was something I never realized way back then. Because I was young, I was stupid, I don't know that much about feelings or love or..." nahigit niya ang paghinga nang muling magtagpo ang mga mata nila. "It took me some time to realize that... that maybe you're just lying because... because people always never believed you, right?"

Tears began streaming down her cheeks.

Mapangunawang pinunasan niya ang pisngi nito. "But I understand it now, Stacey," pigil niya ang maluha. "I understand it now..."

He drew his face close to her, slowly... He saw no protest so he went for it. Renante planted a soft kiss on her lips. Stacey made no response, just letting his lips press against hers. And the kiss still lingered as they slowly separated. He left her lips slightly parted. Renante still held his breath through it all.

Her eyes met his'. Her lids were growing heavier.

"When this is all over," he caressed her cheek, "we'll start all over again, okay? New beginnings, right? We'll date. We'll get to know each other more, Stacey. I'll see you in a better light and you'll see me in a better light. Hmm?"

Her eyes lowered to his lips.

"Will you give me that chance, Stacey?"

Hindi nito masalo ang titig niya. At hindi maintindihan ni Renante kung bakit masakit. Masakit na natatagalan ang dalaga bago makasagot sa kanya. She blinked her eyes and sighed.

Napailing na lang si Renante. "Ah, you're drunk," he sighed before returning his gaze into her eyes. "May work ka pa bukas. Come on, get some sleep."

Tumayo na siya at mula sa pagkakakandong sa kanya ni Stacey, binuhat niya ito nang nakaalalay sa ilalim ng mga binti ang kanyang mga kamay at braso. Tahimik na yumakap lang ang dalaga sa kanyang leeg. Pinatong nito ang gilid ng ulo sa kanyang balikat. As he carried her out of his room, he realized that Stacey began dozing off.

Dinala niya ang dalaga sa sarili nitong kwarto. Inalala niya ang pag-aalaga na binigay nito sa kanya nung nag-inuman sila. He carefully wiped her face with a towel, wet with lukewarm water. Nag-iwan din siya ng isang tall glass ng baso sa night table nito, nilagyan ng takip. He sat on the side of her bed and made sure the comforter would keep her body covered.

He returned his eyes on Stacey. Naiwan sa mukha ng dalaga ang bakas ng pag-aalala. He could not help worrying.

.

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***

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HER VISION KEPT LASPING. First, she could see Renante's face. Then, darkness. Then Renante's face. And then, she hugged him. Iyon at nagmulat na ulit ng mga mata si Stacey.

Nagulo na ang kumot sa kama. Yakap niya ang isang unan habang nakatitig siya sa kawalan.

"God!" bangon niya agad nang matandaang work day ngayon. Lalo niyang pinaspasan ang galaw nang makitang mag-i-isang oras na siyang late.

Nagmamadaling naligo siya at nagbihis. She made sure the water was cold to knock off the hang-over poking her brain. Nang makapagbihis, dumiretso siya sa kusina. Kukuha dapat siya ng tumbler nang mapansing may nakahanda nang pagkain sa mesa.

Tinanggal niya ang nakatakip na pinggan sa magkakapatong na mga pancakes. May nakasipit na papel sa ilalim ng pinggan kaya hinugot niya iyon.

Stace,

I hope they're still warm when you eat them. Thank you for letting me stay last night.

And remember, you're not a terrible person.

You're just misunderstood.

But don't worry, someone understands you now.

Renante,

She could feel her head pounding from the hang-over. Naalala niya ang mga nangyari kagabi.

And that kiss...

Sa tingin niya, maagang umalis ang lalaki dahil nasa mansyon ng mga Villaluz pa ang mga gamit nito. He had to leave early to get to work on time.

Again, back to that kiss...

"When this is all over," he caressed her cheek, "we'll start all over again, okay? New beginnings, right? We'll date. We'll get to know each other more, Stacey. I'll see you in a better light and you'll see me in a better light. Hmm?"

Her eyes lowered to his lips.

"Will you give me that chance, Stacey?"

Those... sexy lips...

Stacey immediately shrugged it off. Nagmamadali siya. Nagmamadali siya ngayon pumunta sa trabaho. Nagmamadali siya. Nagmamadali siya. Paulit-ulit niya iyon pinaalala sa sarili habang kumikilos.

Nilagpasan niya ang pancakes at kinuha ang tumbler. Paalis na sana siya pero nakonsensya na hindi man lang kinain ang pancakes. She put them in a lunchbox, carried it in one hand and left the house.

.

.

"GOOD MORNING, SIR!" bati ng sekretarya na kilalang-kilala si Renante.

"Good morning," malamig niyang tugon sa babae na tumayo mula sa likuran ng counter table nito. "I'm just going to see my brother."

Kasalukuyan siyang nasa VMMS, Inc. (Villaluz Metal Manufacturing and Shipping, Inc.), abot-tanaw ang pinid na pinto ng opisina ng kasalukuyang CEO nito na si Ronnie. Dalawang taon na ang nakakalipas mula nang ipasa rito ng kanilang ama ang posisyong iyon. Kinontento na lang ni Ronaldo ang sarili bilang Chairman of the Board.

"Okay, Sir. I will just inform him—"

"I'm his brother," he gritted. "And you know that, Charlene, and you think you need to call him up to inform that?"

"S-Sir—"

Malalaki ang mga hakbang na dineretso niya ang opisina ng kapatid. Hinablot niya ang door handle and hinatak pababa. He muttered a curse when the door did not budge.

Nagtitimping napalingon siya sa sekretarya. Napapiksi ito sa talim ng tingin niya kaya nagkukumahog na nag-dial sa telepono nito.

"H-Hello. Good morning, Sir," palipat-lipat ang natataranta nitong mga mata kay Renante at sa sariling desk. "Yes, Sir. Ah, Sir..." Nakinig ito sa sinasabi ni Ronnie sa kabilang-linya. "Sir!" pasimpleng awat nito sa kausap. "Sir, si Sir Renante po... Nandito." Another silence.

Nilipat ni Renante ang mga mata sa pinid na pinto.

"Yes, Sir. Salamat po," at dahan-dahan nitong binaba ang telepono. She released this audible sigh of relief before turning to face him. "Sir Renante—"

"Thanks," he rudely interrupted and tried the door handle again. Hindi na naman bumukas.

Nang bitawan, at saka lang iyon gumalaw. The door opened, but Ronnie could not be seen.

Tinulak niya ang pinto, pinatuloy ang sarili. He saw Ronnie walking back to his desk. Sinara niya agad ang pinto at ni-lock iyon.

After all, he didn't want any interruptions.

"Yes, Mr. Villaluz?" pormal na bati sa kanya ng kapatid nang makapuwesto sa tapat ng swivel chair nito. Hindi pa ito umuupo. His hand was busy unbuttoning the bottom part of his dark blue, suit's blazer.

"Ano ang sinabi mo kay Stacey kagabi?"

Tumaas ang sulok ng labi nito. Nanunudyo. "Oh, why ask me? You think she's not telling the truth when you asked her about that?"

"Did you mention to her about the investigation years ago?" lapit niya sa desk nito.

"What if I did?" mapanghamon nitong saad.

Nakuyom niya ang kamao. "Bakit?"

"Gusto niyang malaman kung bakit ko kinakausap si Brian, hindi ba? So I explained everything to her."

"How come that is related with what you just did recently?" he hissed.

"Because it's the same old trick, Renante!" pagseseryoso na nito. "The stalker thing. The investigation thing. At sinisigurado ko lang na ginagawa nung Brian ng maayos ang pag-iimbestiga!"

"And how did you know that? Paano mo nalaman—"

"It's your detective's fault," kinakapa na nito ang loob ng suit. Alam niyang nagsisimula nang manuot ang stress kay Ronnie kapag naghahanap na ito ng mahihithit na sigarilyo. Smoking was one of his brother's ways of concealing how stressed he was. "He contacted me. Nadiscover niya na pinaimbestigahan ko raw noon ang stalker case ni Stacey. He asked me some questions about the stalker, about how I felt with the results, at ano ang masasabi ko ngayong nagbalik daw ang stalker ni Stacey. Wala ba iyon sa mga files niya?"

"Wala," matalim niyang titig dito.

"Oh, too bad," hugot nito ng sigarilyo bago binalik ang kahon niyon sa inner pocket ng blazer na suot. "That's interview just happened recently. And I requested for a second meeting around Holy Week to... ask for an update."

"Too bad, you can't meddle now. He's already dead," mabigat niyang bitaw na nagpakunot sa noo ni Ronnie.

He was slightly shocked, but less affected. "Too bad. Who's handling the case now?"

"Wala ka na roon. Now tell me, ano pa ang mga sinabi mo kay Stacey?" pagtitimpi niya. "She's so drunk when I found her in the party, Ronnie. She's feeling like she's this terrible person! Binabalik na naman niya ang mga isyu nung nakaraan na dapat hindi na namin iniisip ngayon!"

"Oh, I thought she's so tough. Never knew she's a crybaby," tapat nito ng lighter sa dulo ng hawak na stick ng sigarilyo. "I just called her a liar. That my brother is not supposed to be around a liar like her." Mischief shone in Ronnie's eyes as he stole a glance at him. "It'll be dangerous."

Pero tuluyan nang napatid ang pasensya ni Renante. Hinablot niya ito sa kwelyuhan.

"How dare you call her that," he spat to his face.

"Bakit? Hindi mo rin ba minsang binansagang sinungaling ang babaeng iyan?"

"Noon iyon!" sigaw niya rito. "Nung hindi ko pa siya naiintindihan!"

"Naiintindihan?" nanatili itong kalmante, pero dama niya ang pagiging alerto ni Ronnie. "How can you justify being a liar, Renante? There is no right reason to be a liar."

"Why?" he seethed. "Aren't we all liars, Ronnie? Ilang beses ka na bang nagsinungaling sa mga kliyente natin? Sa mga business partners natin? How many false hopes and exaggerated promises have you given them? Ilang beses mo ba silang binobola sa mga golf games ninyo para lakihan ang investment sa kumpanyang ito? How many times have you lied to Dad? He even didn't know about you, hiring a detective for my little request, right? What did you tell him about that? Sabi mo, natalo mo lang sa sugal 'yung pera, hindi ba?"

Ronnie's jaws tensed. Alam niyang nasasapul ang kanyang kapatid dahil sa pagguhit ng galit sa mga mata nito.

"And I know you're also lying to Dad that you love this company so bad!" patuloy niya. "Behind that suit and tie is a man who wants to break free from this damned office! I bet you're also regretting being old and still single, ignoring this woman you really like because she won't impress Dad!"

"I'm warning you," pagtitimpi ng lalaki. "Huwag mong itutuloy iyan."

But he could not be stopped now, tugging Ronnie's collar that he was cluthing angrily. "Tandaan mo! Nagsinungaling ka sa babaeng mahal mo! Nagsinungaling ka na hindi mo siya mahal para sa kumpanyang ito! Now that you got your position, it's too late, right? She's already married!"

That's it. That's the last toll. Ronnie knock his hand off his collar, grabbed him by the side collar of his shirt. Manginig-nginig na inamba nito ang kamao sa kanya. Muntik na iyong sumayad sa mukha niya, nang mahablot agad ni Renante ang braso nito. Tinabig niya iyon sabay tulak sa kapatid pasubasob sa desk nito. The left side of Ronnie's face slammed and pressed on the desk, as Renante lifted a fist.

Nakaamba na iyon sa kapatid nang matauhan siya.

He felt his whole body shook, his furious blood still surging. Nanghihinang pinakawalan niya ang kapatid. Dahan-dahang inahon ni Ronnie ang sarili mula sa pagkakasubasob sa desk nito.

"Hindi kita susuntukin, dahil alam kong aawayin niya ako kapag sinaktan kita. Hindi ko sasapakin iyang mukha mo, dahil mali ang mga pinagsasasabi mo kay Stacey na hindi siya makakabuti para sa akin. Kagabi pa kita gustong komprontahin, ayaw lang niya. Dahil alam ko, ayaw niya tayong mag-away. Ayaw tayong mag-away nung taong sinabihan mong nakakasama para sa akin."

"But that won't change the fact that she's a liar," humihingal nitong saad, matalim ang tingin sa kanya. "She's only going to lie to you, Renante. And when that happens, don't say I didn't warn you."

"You know why she's lying? Just like us, she's lying because people never made her feel comfortable with being honest. I know, because I have been one of those people who made her feel that way. I know, because you made me feel that way, Dad made us feel that way. We're afraid to be honest because we are scared of being told we're wrong," galit niyang anas bago nilisan ang opisina ni Ronnie.