I need you to be ugly to me.
You've already emotionally hurt me but I need to see your truth on the outside so I can totally accept it.

Because I look at you-
Those are the blue eyes I used to drown in.
Those are the lips I used to kiss.
When I look at you, you are still the person I love-
just plain.

I need you to be more than that.
I need your dull irises to only be seen through squinted eyes.
I need your lips to fade so much into your skin, I can't even remember their shape and the way it pressed into my hand.

I need your face to become deformed.
I need you to look like a totally different person-
the horrible one that hurt me has to look different that the person you were before.
I need you to be ugly to me.