8: Your Thoughts Were Loud Enough
Frank was sandwiched between Gerard and Josh in a very nice business class seat. An impromptu flight to California for business quickly turned into a secret vacation. Frank hadn't seen Josh since the incident between them and he could tell the air was still awkward. What made it worse was the fact that poor Ty was all alone. He was a low-class criminal, why would he befriend a politician? And due to Gerard's rule of thumb, Ty had to travel alone and pretend he didn't know the other three. At least Gerard had paid for Ty's business class ticket which meant that his germaphobia wouldn't be as bad as it could potentially have been if he was stuck in Economy. Frank pretended to ignore the proximity between him and Josh, ignoring the fresh cucumber and cologne smell that hung around the muscular pup as he read through his copy of The Devil Wears Prada. Jim was also there with them, wearing his Service Dog vest and his favorite frog hat, laying like a good boy at their feet.
They had been in the air for a good hour by now and Frank was so happy to have the excuse of sitting next to his Master in public. He was also grateful for the blanket that was concealing Gerard's hand on his thigh. He sipped on his tiny can of coke as he helped Gerard quietly go through a contract for his new campaign. He was also considering a side business all the way out in California. Frank didn't understand much of it, but he was still as supportive as ever.
Josh's book had been discarded on the tray in front of him as he continued to text Ty. Frank glanced over to see that Ty had begun sending Josh some very sad selfies as he sat all by himself. He smiled a little, happy that they were happy, and turned back to Gerard just as a hand crept up his thigh a little more. He swallowed, keeping his face as stoic as possible, and looked at the laptop screen on the tray in front of him that Gerard had set up.
He tried so hard to focus on the words that were blurring together, his concentration so intent that it took him a second to realize that Ty had come to sit in the empty seat next to them. Frank looked on with genuine curiosity at the other two. They seemed to be engaging in, what Frank could only assume to be, a roleplay scene where Ty and Josh had just met for the first time. And to Frank's surprise, Ty was behaving like a completely different person. He wasn't quiet and brooding and reserved as Frank knew him to be. He was smiling almost, such a weird sight especially for a Native - a joke that Ty had actually given Frank permission to use since it was apparently true. He introduced himself to a very blush-riddled Josh and began ruthlessly flirting with him. Josh was captivated, turning in his seat to talk to the 'stranger' he had just 'met'.
Frank smiled a little at their game and then turned his attention once more to the laptop. It was so weird to think that just a week ago, he had hurt them both so badly, and now here they all were together as though nothing had happened.
Of course, it hadn't ended there. Ty and Gerard had argued over the entire thing and Frank was genuinely worried that someone was going to get slapped, but they seemed to come to a consensus rather quickly. And that consensus ended with Frank being punished for his disobedience. Usually, Frank would have been accepting of his punishment from his Master, but this punishment didn't come from him; it was Ty's choice and that scared Frank to his core. The only punishment he had received from Ty was when he had been forced to watch them have sex. This was different. This was an actual punishment. He could have said 'no', he could have fought it, but he was terrified that that would have made it worse.
His bones still ached from being stretched. Ty had told him that if he was going to use his legs to kick like 'the stubborn donkey' he was, then Ty was going to teach him what happened. He could still vividly remember being strapped to the table and having his body stretched to the point of agony. He shuddered when it all came flooding back, the last point resonating just behind his navel. He swallowed and decidedly moved on from that memory, focusing, instead, on something that had been on his mind for a little while now.
"Sir?" He whispered softly and turned to look at Gerard, reveling in their sheer closeness, so close that he could see every perfect and pristine pore of his Dominant's pale skin.
"Yes, boy?"
"Permission to ask a question?" Frank continued their hushed conversation as Gerard continued to caress his submissive's thigh under the navy blue airline blanket.
"Granted."
"Remember when we first met, the interview?"
"Vividly," Gerard's lips pulled at one corner into a small smile, "What of it?"
"I remember you wanted to ask me something back then and told me you were gonna think about it. Did you ever ask me or did you forget what it was?"
Gerard sat back to think for a moment, sitting his tortoise-shell framed glasses up into his ginger hair, "Vaguely. I don't think I ever got around to asking you."
"What was it?"
"It really isn't anything arduous or pertinent, boy." He chuckled as he sipped on his water, "Really."
"But what was it, sir? If I'm allowed to know." He gives Gerard a small smile.
"I was just going to make mention of how young you were. It surprised me." He smiled and crossed a long leg over the other, the side of his brown leather boot caressing Frank's shin so casually, "Merely your actual age in comparison to your mental age. I like that you're intellectually beyond your years, it means I don't have to put up with the same things that I would if you behaved your age or younger. I don't think I could cope."
"You're not into the young things trying to make you all hip and cool?" Frank grinned, earning a flick to the head that had him giggle.
"I'd rather remain my old self, thank you very much."
"Please do." Frank whispered and smiled warmly, an earnest plea, "Don't change."
"If there's one thing about me on which you can rely, it's that I am consistent."
Ty snorted as he interjected in their conversation, breaking character in his roleplay for just a moment to snark, "Oh, totally. He came out of the womb as a middle aged man in a suit."
Frank giggled quietly and looked at Gerard, "It is kinda hard to picture you as a child, sir."
"Why? I wasn't as boisterous as other boys my age, but I still played with toys and had fun."
"Books are not toys, sir." Josh smiled at him politely.
Gerard let out a huff, "I'll have you know that I had a stuffed bear and a firetruck and building blocks as a young child."
"Ooh, very rambunctious. Calm down, tiger." Ty snorted as he sipped on a sparkling water. Gerard scowled at him ruefully.
"You stay quiet, stranger."
Ty turned back to Josh with a grin and continued talking to him about his side business, to which Josh listened intently. Frank smiled at his Master and played with the tag on the blanket, "You had a stuffed bear, sir?"
"Of course I did. He was wonderful, I'd had him since birth."
"Did he have a name, sir?" Frank sipped on his soda, clutching the can with both hands as he lay his head back against his seat.
Gerard chuckled and picked up his own and wrote on a page in his notebook. He held it up for Frank to see, "Try and pronounce it. My father named him for me. It's Gaelic."
"Oh, God." Frank muttered as he looked at the word, "Uh... It looks like 'carebear'."
Gerard looked at the word, "So it does. It's not even remotely, though. Give it a try."
"I know Gaelic is pronounced differently from the spelling. Uh..." Frank stared at the name, hoping that it would just jump out and pronounce itself for him instead. He didn't want to make an ass of himself in front of his Dominant. But 'Cairbre' wasn't exactly the same as 'fluffy'. He felt his cheeks flush as he looked at Gerard's sparkling eyes, "Is it like 'saber'?"
"Nope."
"Damn it." He huffed and frowned, "I don't know, sir."
"It's pronounced much like 'kahr-bra', boy." He smiled, "He who rides a chariot. He used to sit in this little wagon I had in my room."
Frank smiled brightly at the mental image of a tiny redhead boy in his room with a stuffed bear sitting in a wagon overlooking the construction of a block tower, "It's lovely, sir. Where is Cairbre now, anyway?"
He chuckled, "He sits on Lindsey's bed most days. He gets better use as her cuddle buddy than he does with me."
Frank grinned, "You kept him?"
"Of course I did. Why would I not?"
"I don't really see you as someone who holds onto sentimentality, if I'm honest, sir." He shrugged a little and toyed with the pull tab on his can, "I could be wrong."
Gerard smiled almost, putting his glasses back on the bridge of his nose, "Wholeheartedly incorrect. I may not hold onto every piece or every gift I've ever been given but I keep those things that matter most."
"Like Cairbre?"
"Exactly. I kept him on the off chance that I would give him to my child, if I ever had one." He shrugged nonchalantly, "Unfortunately, it was not in the cards for myself or Lindsey."
Frank pouted, "I'm sorry, sir."
"There's no need. A child would never fit into my life at this point. I'm past the point of wanting to father a child, my career takes up far too much time. As do my extracurricular activities." He eyes Frank over the edge of his glasses, the action instantly made the submissive blush and melt in his seat.
He tilted his head to look at Gerard, his smile softening as he took in the perfect features of the man he so adored. Gerard gave him a subtle wink, turning back to their work. Frank didn't approve of that; he was way too excited for their trip and far too distracted to be working. He turned in his seat to face Gerard, "Talk to me, please. We can work when we get to Sacramento."
Gerard glanced sideways at Frank, his tongue mulling against his teeth as he thought it over. And for a rare occasion, Frank was triumphant in comparison to Gerard's prosperous career. He closed the laptop and slid it back into his brown leather briefcase, "Alright. What topic would you prefer for our conversation?"
Frank snorted as he got comfy, "This isn't the fucking Ed Sullivan show, sir. We aren't here to talk about recent headlines. I just wanna talk to you about nothing."
Gerard's eyebrow rose, "Someone's exceedingly sassy today."
Frank gave his Dominant a very innocent smile with a few bats of his eyelashes, "Never, sir."
"Absolutely reprehensible. How are you feeling since your big slip-up?"
Frank pursed his lips and whispered, "Still a little guilty, I guess. But physically? I feel better. Not as achy."
"Are you sure you don't want to have your ear fixed?" Gerard tilted Frank's head around to look at the steadily-healing wound, "I know the stitches have already been taken out but the cartilage takes months to fully heal. We can have your ear grafted by a professional."
"It's okay, I like it. I don't mind that I have an elf ear." He smiled and reached up to brush his fingertips over the missing segment of his antihelix.
Gerard's lips pulled into a tiny smile, "That's your choice. As long as you're happy with your body."
"I mean, I guess. The ear is the least of my worries." Frank shrugged. Gerard's eyebrow rose yet again at Frank's answer, only having him feel the need to tack on his explanation, "Well... I'm not a hundred percent happy. But who is? Of all the things on my body that I'd want to change, the ear isn't even top ten."
"You have a top ten?"
Frank looked at his hands and shrugged a little, "Kinda."
"Am I allowed to know which parts qualify onto this slightly-concerning list?"
"Only if you don't get mad." Frank muttered, unable to look his partner in the eye.
"Why on Earth would I get mad about your opinions? They're yours for a reason. Especially about yourself. If it's something we can fix to make you feel better then we can do that. If it's not fixable then we can work on helping you accept it and love yourself..." Gerard leaned in close to whisper, "Just as much as I love you."
Frank looked up at him with wide eyes, "R-Really?"
"Cross my heart." Gerard replied in a soft, hushed tone, taking hold of Frank's hand under the blanket to give it a squeeze, "Now tell me what is on this list of yours."
"W-Well, I... Sometimes I don't like my eyes and my eye shape. The monolid thing. But I can't tell if it's because it's on me or because of my dad. I know it looks beautiful on other Asian people."
"I happen to love your eyes." Gerard smiled, "They suit you. They give you a... Timeless look."
"I always thought my lips were too small." He added before squinting at Gerard, "You shush."
Gerard hid his smirk, "I didn't say but a word, boy."
"Your thoughts were loud enough." He scoffed but smiled, thrumming and enjoying the fact that his Master seemed to enjoy his mouth no matter how he disliked his own lips.
"You have eight more spots to fill."
"I'm trying to like my body shape more these days. I used to hate how effeminate I was built because I was supposed to fill a certain role. But now... It doesn't seem so bad."
"I'm glad."
"I always wanted to be taller but there's nothing I can do about that."
"You could start wearing heeled shoes, Frank." Gerard offered with a smile.
"What, like, heels?"
"Not necessarily. Platform boots or even men's shoes that have a heel to them." Gerard gestured to Josh's shoes, "See?"
Frank glanced down to see the black leather boots on Josh's feet that were, in fact, footed with a thick rubber platform. They looked so incredible on him and added at least an inch or two to Josh's height. Frank nodded, "Yeah, maybe. It might help. They did make my legs look nice that one time."
"I'll say."
Frank smiled, his cheeks warming instantly, "Uh... My..." he sat back to think, "That stupid wrinkle between my eyebrows that I permanently have from always frowning when I worry."
"Nothing that a little minor Botox couldn't fix if you hated it that much. It's your body after all." Gerard stopped his water, "What else?"
"My teeth." Frank mumbled, "One or two of 'em are a little skew and I notice it if I smile in pictures."
"That's fixable." Gerard stated simply, "Four left."
"Well, it used to be my... Well, not my weight but just... The lack of toning, I guess. But we're fixing that."
"We are. Quite nicely, I may add." Gerard turned in his seat, rubbing Frank's hand with his thumb gently.
"Thank you, sir."
"I used to get pretty upset about the tiny amount of body hair I manage to grow. Like, yeah, I have hair on my legs and in my armpits but I couldn't grow a beard if I tried. Or chest hair. And it used to bug me a lot. But I guess... I mean, I guess it's not the worst thing. I could just be too harsh on myself."
"There's less maintenance for you, in that case." Gerard added, to which Frank nodded in agreement. Gerard finished his water with one last, long gulp before he closed the bottle and set it aside, "What are the last two?"
"My hair bugs me sometimes. I never know what to do with it. I don't know what suits me and what doesn't. I've had the same haircut since high school because I've been too afraid to do something and fuck it up. The only thing that changes is the color."
"That's also fixable. We can find someone to help you with that." Gerard gave Frank a warm smile, "And the last?"
"My nose."
"Your nose, my boy?" He frowned in genuine confusion, "What of it?"
"I don't like the shape of it on my face. It feels so... Big and ugly. Like they took my Italian genes and stuck it on my Japanese face. I hate it." He pouted and looked down, "The rest of my family on my dad's side have such nice little sloped noses and then there's me."
"I like it." Josh whispered softly and turned to look at Frank with a small smile, "I've got a hooked nose and I've always been self conscious of it. But living with Ty has made me not hate it so much. He has one too, because of his ancestors. And it suits his face. Yours is nice. It makes you look more sculpted. It's... it..." he trailed off into a bare whisper, "...pretty."
Frank stared at him in surprise, blinking a few times as his brain emerged from the sludge to kick-start, finally processing the pure compliment he had received so suddenly from the last person he had expected. Gerard smiled at his submissive, "What do you say, boy?"
"Th-Thank you, Josh." He stuttered, his whole face turning a pale shade of pink, "Thanks."
"You're welcome."
Ty took Josh's hand in his leather-glove clad hands to give it a proud squeeze, almost smiling at his submissive. Josh turned to look at Ty with adoration, continuing their quiet talking. Frank looked at Gerard, smiling a little as he lay back in his seat. Gerard turned to lean closer, "Un si bon garçon."
[Such a good boy]
"Me?" Frank's smile widened, "Really?"
"Oui."
Frank would kiss Gerard if he could, practically heart-eyed as he looked at him. He put his hand on Gerard's under the blanket and gave his manicured fingers a squeeze. He couldn't help the exultant grin on his face as he took Gerard's hand to put it on his crotch.
He didn't intend for anything to become of his playful actions, merely teasing his Master because he could. Which was why he was so wholeheartedly surprised when Gerard didn't remove his hand at all, but rather, just gently began rubbing Frank with his thumb idly. Frank tried to remain nonchalant, staring at him and hoping that no one planned to walk passed.
Gerard put on the screen in front of them, choosing one of the first movies on the list. Frank swallowed, his vision already hazy around the edges as he tried to fight off a semi. He huffed softly under his breath, his eyes on the screen as Gerard started palming him slowly, applying just enough pressure to have Frank's toes curling in his shoes.
His brain couldn't focus on much else, his train of thought on a one-way track toward absolute submission. But there was no way. Not here, not now. He couldn't. He knew he had to keep himself contained because his inner sub was a lot louder than he had intended them to be. And also way too obvious.
He just hoped that the flight wasn't somehow already over because there was no way he'd be able to stand up, let alone walk. He lifted his hips just a fraction, rocking his feet until he was on his toes, his breath frozen in his lungs. This was so irresponsible for Gerard, so out of character. They hadn't ever even held hands in public and now they were here, stuck on a flight with dozens of other people and recklessly touching.
He held onto the armrest to keep him grounded, trying not to alert anyone around them or Josh to what was going on. He was so achingly hard by now, pressed so tightly against his own jeans and against his Dominant's palm. There was no way they could do this and get away with it, but there was no way he could possibly tell Gerard to stop. He didn't want it to stop, but the adrenaline and the anxiety were mixing together in his head and creating a distorted sense of valor.
He wrapped his hand around Gerard's wrist under the blanket and turned to look at him, his eyes wide and pleading, but for what, he didn't know. Gerard gave his submissive a small and reassuring smile, turning Frank's head back to face the screen before he continued the slow and torturous act of teasing. Frank wanted to implode, his skin already so hot against his clothes. He swallowed hoarsely against his own tongue and tried to behave. The swirls of intense pleasure burner sommuch brighter than any other time he had ever just casually been touched by his Master, the coils tightening perfecting, crouching in wait like a predator preparing to pounce on the unsuspecting submissive who thought he could control himself.
He bit down on his lip in an attempt to stifle a tiny sound, his leg lifting a tiny bit and rolling on his ankle as he felt Gerard's thumb skid slowly over the denim material that separated their skin. He couldn't do it. He couldn't take it. He felt as though everyone knew. He felt his own safeword creep into his throat and he couldn't stop it before it fell.
His eyes widened when he realized, Gerard's hand pausing immediately. Frank felt tears in his eyes, sudden embarrassment that he had ruined their moment entirely. Gerard lifted his hand up to show Frank he had stopped, giving Frank a soft smile. He peered around for a quick second before he took Frank's hand to give it a kiss, "It's okay, prince."
"I-I-... I didn't..." He stammered, his heart racing, "Not you. I just- I couldn't-"
Jim looked up from his comfy spot on the floor by their feet, whining at the smell of Frank's distress. Josh looked away from Ty and at the frantic submissive next to him, frowning. He clearly misunderstood Frank's sudden anxiety for some form of plane-related panic and immediately took Frank's hand in his to squeeze it reassuringly. He whispered praise to Jim and gave him a treat from his pocket for his good job. Frank exhaled, closing his eyes, both hands being held seemed to help in abating his nerves.
He felt so stupid about safewording, hoping that Gerard wasn't mad at him. He didn't look mad; if anything, he looked proud of Frank. Smiling a little as he turned in his seat as much as he could to keep his submissive company without raising suspicion.
Josh held Frank's hand for the entire flight, making sure that he was okay whenever he stopped talking to Ty. Jim had now also taken to looking after Frank, resting his face on the latter's knee whenever he sat up. And although, Frank felt like he had ruined everything, there was some part of him that was proud of what he had done. He had obeyed his instincts and in doing so, had obeyed his Master. That's what counted, after all.
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