The weather was getting better lately. February wore off in a series of warmer breezes and pools of budding flowers in his garden, and Renjun was beginning to regain some faith in whatever the sky bought down on them after that draughty winter.

He'd decided against wearing a coat to work, but he was beginning to regret it, standing at a bus stop trying and not to shiver to preserve his pride. It wasn't that cold. In fact, it had been warm all week.

He distracted himself by thinking of what Jeno had told him about the trip to the beach he and Jaemin had attended, along with their teammates. "Sounds like a lot of fun," Renjun had replied, "I might consider joining the team if I would also get to go on these trips too."

He had actually wanted to go, though. It had sounded like a lot of fun, but really? He missed hanging out with both Jeno and Jaemin. For some reason, over the past few days, Jaemin had stopped coming to any hangouts, and said hangouts themselves had decreased in number. Things like hanging around at lunch, or going to the arcade at the weekends, or even just accompanying each other to their bus stops or houses. These little things that had disappeared as suddenly as they had come. Jeno was still there, and Renjun was happy, but, and he felt a little spoiled saying it, everything came alive when both of them were with him. Besides them being his crushes, they also complimented each other perfectly, and it just made Renjun pleased to see them together, like it scratched an everpresent itch. 

Anyway, the concept of missing the chance of spending the entire day at the beach with his crushes was a bit disappointing. They had even made smores at the end, around a whole ass campfire. How depressing. He might as well join the basketball team, even though he hated basketball. 

Renjun stopped walking and tapped the button on the traffic lights, bouncing on the balls of his feet nervously. There was another, even more selfish reason for him to join the basketball team, if it were to happen. 

He had a terrifying hunch that those two were going to get into a relationship. 

The idea shot arrow of guilt into his stomach, twisting his thoughts. Of course, he should be happy for Jeno should it happen. They got along so well, better than how Renjun got along with Jaemin. And it was Renjun's job as a good friend to be happy for them.

Jeno had also been jumpy when he'd been on the phone with Renjun that morning, sounding distracted when he'd been telling Renjun about what had happened at the beach. Like he was hiding something. It gnawed at Renjun, because realistically, it was going to have something to do with Jaemin. He rubbed at his eyes. Be happy for them, be happy for —

A car honked its horn and he jumped and ran across the road before the pedestrian lights turned orange again.

=

Renjun reached work, and almost avoided Jaemin after the thought process he had just suffered through. But, in all honesty, when Na Jaemin said hi to you, you were nobody to ignore him. And when he asked you how your day had gone, you are to tell him you're doing amazing and it's so good of him to ask. And then, preferably, you would have kept talking to him, unless your boss came out and looked at you like they're actively searching for sack-worthy behaviour.

Johnny handed Renjun a bowl practically overflowing with soup and a plate of bread on a single tray, and promptly told him the table the food was destined to be sent to. Renjun carefully balanced it between his hands, sending every prayer to any and all gods above that he didn't drop it. He wasn't exactly a clumsy person, but he wasn't the most agile one either. Before signing himself up for the job, he had hoped being a waiter would help him with that. It had, somewhat — he made it.

Renjun set the tray down on the table it was designated for and smiled at the two occupants seated there, which just so happened to be an old lady and a teenaged boy, tall and blonde — foreign. Renjun didn't see many foreigners at Empathy.

He looked at him for a second too long — the boy grinned slyly, and Renjun blinked, standing up abruptly and walking away. He felt two eyes burning holes in his back, and he swallowed, a cold sweat breaking out on his back. It was strange, novel, and he didn't know how to deal with the unwanted attention.

Face a little pink from embarrassment, he headed back to the kitchen to grab a jug of water to replace the empty one he had spotted on a table on the other side of the room. On the way he came by Jaemin, who he subtly tapped on the shoulder to gain the attention of. Jaemin turned to him with the prettiest fucking smile, and Renjun had to remember why he had tapped his shoulder in the first place. "Hey, Jaemin," he said lamely, dragging out the hey. Jaemin said hey back (Renjun's elongated version, too) and laughed, which felt beyond rewarding every single time. Renjun gathered himself and continued, "See that guy, over by the window? With the old lady? He was looking at me real weird. Should I be bothered?"

Jaemin frowned lightly, "Specify what you mean by weird." Renjun fiddled with his watch, ears and cheeks warming as he wondered how to put it normally that this random kid had just casually been staring at him. He swore he had imagined Jaemin struggling to keep a smile off his face. "Eh, nothing really. Just... y'know... looking at me," he gestured helplessly up and down his torso, and his face practically caught fire, "Can foreigners, like, not? It's not like I'm some ulzzang" He added dumbly, slightly mad at the boy for making him act like a fool. Jaemin snorted, then cooed, pinching Renjun's burning cheek. "I'll keep an eye on him, can't have him bothering our Renjun."

Renjun breathlessly thanked him, and ran away, off to do whatever he had to do to get paid. Jaemin turned his gaze towards the aforementioned white kid, then started as he saw him looking right at him. He looked behind himself and to his sides, trying to see if there was anyone that he might be focused on, but everyone was chatting away or eating their food, oblivious to anything that was happening beyond their table.

It struck him that he was quite obviously interested in Renjun, and Jaemin acting soft with the boy had pissed him off. So Jaemin glared right back, because he had to protect his man. Right now, it didn't matter whether they were dating or ever going to date, because Jaemin had found a reason to be petty and was going to use the chance happily. It still took a few questioning looks from a few of the other waiters to get him to stop sneering right back at that boy's pinched up little face and finally get back to the kitchen. He decided to keep an eye on him from then on, just in case.

=

"Quickly just head over to the storage closet and get a few of the yellow j-cloths and surface cleaners, we've run out in the kitchen. The one containing cleaning supplies is right down the corridor where the bathrooms are, here are the keys for the lock. I'd ask Mingyu to do it, but he's gone and, uh, decided to just not show up for the job..."

Renjun set off on his mini-quest, not really thinking much of it and idly wondering where Mingyu might have gotten off to. Jungwoo had looked mysteriously sheepish about it, so that was something to wonder about.

He unlocked the door and got out a packet of untouched j-cloths and a couple half-used sprays, hoping they were the appropriate ones. Out of curiosity, he checked the clock that was set upon the wall right outside the bathroom and was thrilled to learn that he would be due to leave, along with Jaemin, in just fifteen minutes. He locked the door, put the jingling keys in his pocket, and turned to leave.

But his exit was blocked by a figure. A tall one, standing in front of the ajar door, hip jutting out in some grotesque pose that was supposedly meant to be attractive. Renjun blinked, and went to move around him, but this guy was completely set on keeping him where he was. He took a deep breath, his annoyance turning to unease, "Excuse me, sir?"

"Excuse you," he replied mockingly, a sad imitation of a smirk on his face. Renjun swallowed as he took a step back in retaliation to the other taking a step forward. This continued until he was almost pressed against the back wall, his breathing quick and shallow.

Renjun wanted to do nothing more than push him away and get the fuck out of there, but he couldn't see himself overpowering this guy. It was terrifying. His heart was in his throat.

"C'mon, don't be so stiff." His Korean was slightly shaky, but he was fluent. Like how Renjun's used to be when he was maybe eight or nine. His face was darkened from the directly overhead lighting. "I've never wanted to get along with a Korean guy so badly... but here we are."

"I'm... Chinese." Renjun's mouth was dry. His back was now completely stuck to the wall in his efforts to get away from him.

"You're cute enough. What's your name?"

Renjun cringed, "I have a name tag."

"Oh, shut up." The guy laughed. He probably thought she was being romantic, but this was the most ghetto shit Renjun had ever suffered through in his entire life. He went to finger his collar between his forefinger and thumb, but Renjun exhaled sharply and burrowed his chin down to stop him, probably forming a double-chin in the process, hoping somehow that it would be enough to ward him off.

His forehead creased in annoyance, and he put out an arm to the side of Renjun's head. "Dude, just give me what I want, or I'll report you to your boss and you're gonna get into serious trouble. It's not like you can physically resist me, anyway. " Renjun's heartbeat spiked in fear, multiple alarm bells starting to scream over one another in his mind. I don't want that, don't do that, that isn't fair.

His lips curved upwards unpleasantly at the knowledge that she was cutting off the smaller boy's choices. Renjun's pupils were dilated in revulsion as he asked, "What do you want?"

He fingers ghosted over Renjun's hip. "A fun time."

≠

"Psst, come over here. Ay, Jaemin. Jaemin." The clueless boy turned around and looked for Jungwoo, who had called him from where he had heard from nearby but wasn't anywhere in sight. Jungwoo then made Jaemin drop the towel he had been holding when he popped up from behind the bar counter. "For God's sake, hyung," Jaemin panted shallowly from the shock.

Jungwoo giggled and Jaemin became soft and calm again. "I sent Renjun to the storage closet to get a few cloths and stuff a few minutes ago, and he still isn't back yet. I was wondering whether you could go check on him. You see, I need those to clean up a mess immediately. The big container of vodka I usually have here went sploosh~" He added a couple extra sound effects, making Jaemin laugh.

"I'll check on him, don't worry. I'm sure it just took him a while to find the right key." Jaemin sent him one last cheesy smile before setting off across the large room. While walking, his eyes went to the table where the boy whom he had been having a staring match with earlier had been sitting, but he was absent from her seat while his elderly companion ate on, unbothered.

An unpleasant feeling of anxiety settled in the pit of Jaemin's stomach, a sense of wrong. He noticed his own pace quicken by a fraction. The corridor where the storage room was located was curved in a way you couldn't see what was at the end if you were viewing it from the outside, which was rather stupid in Jaemin's opinion. After all, weren't these, the  bathrooms, the place where someone was most likely to be —

"What the fuck is going on here?"

The guy cornering Renjun whipped his head around, tearing his hand away from the wall. Renjun took the chance to shover him away, the tips of his fingers just barely touching his arms, a look of relief etched on his features. The foreigner groaned, "Seriously? Get the fuck out, you cockblocker."

Renjun, now evidently calmed down, retorted, "There's no need to block something that was never coming." A look of irritation crossed his features, and Renjun took a deep breath and stepped away. Jaemin stilled. Renjun looked terrified.

"My boss is right outside the door," lied Jaemin, clenching his fists. The look on his face must have said something. "He has heard everything you just said. But it can be forgotten if you leave, right fucking now. Or I'll beat the leaving shit out of you, without blinking."

That did it. His pupils dilated, and he started strolling towards the door. Renjun fell back against the wall, wiping at his forehead with a shaking hand. Jaemin ran over and hugged him silently.

"That was... the scariest fucking thing I've..."

"Shh, it's fine, just chill for a sec. It's over now, yeah?"

"He said... he wanted — like, he was gonna —" Renjun was cut himself off by Jaemin running his hands up and down his arms roughly, distracting him. He would not allow Renjun to dwell on that. His own heart was thumping as he thanked Jungwoo over and over again for telling him to check on Renjun. He made a mental reminder to take a quick picture of the guy before they went back to work — he knew Renjun was going to refuse to let him tell anyone, but he could always get the guy banned from every restaurant and bar he knew. 

"He's gone now. He's gone, he's not coming back. Fuck, man. I told you, didn't I?" Jaemin stood back, holding Renjun's shoulders. "Who wouldn't hit on you? You're fucking gold."

Renjun smiled slightly, his eyes becoming less clouded. "Thanks, Min. Thanks for showing up."

"No problem — here —" Jaemin took the keys from Renjun's hand and held them up.

"C'mon, we need to get those cloths and shit to Jungwoo-hyung. He has a bit of a mess to clean up. Remember that vodka bottle?"

Renjun laughed, nodding, thought he still looked a bit pale. "He spilled it? Let's get a couple hundred."

Jaemin sighed in relief. "Yeah, let's."

When Jungwoo asked him about why they had taken so long, Jaemin simply said that the key had gotten stuck in the lock because Renjun had accidentally used the wrong one, and he had promptly received an exasperated look from Renjun himself for making him sound like a blundering idiot. Jungwoo tutted him and took the keys, telling them their work was done for today. 

Jaemin turned to Renjun and said he needed to use the bathroom before they left. Renjun said he would wait, of course, and waved Jaemin off. 

Renjun waited at the bar for a minute or so, in front of Jungwoo, who had by then put the j-cloths on the floor to soak up the spill, and was wiping down a few perfectly clean glasses for no particular reason; your typical bartender. Renjun chewed on his lip for a bit, then suddenly turned to Jungwoo, who raised an eyebrow at him, still wiping his glass. The question rested on Renjun's tongue for a second, then —

"How would you get out of the friend zone?"

Jungwoo looked wholly unsurprised at the question, but pleased all the same. "I'd say you should try to be spontaneous. Don't shift into showing them you like them, because that's what everyone does and it never goes well. You see, they would probably just adapt to how you're acting, and continue to believe you're still just their friend. The most you might get out of gradually changing your behaviour towards them is maybe making them confused by your mixed signals." Jungwoo paused, noticing that Renjun looked quite taken aback. "You good there?"

"I'm sorry," Renjun shook his head, "I just wasn't expecting such an exact answer." Jungwoo went to reply, but he zipped his mouth as someone cleared their throat.

Jaemin suddenly made himself visible, and Renjun turned to look at him slowly, his tongue like lead in his mouth. Did he hear anything? The question hadn't had anything to do with Jaemin directly, but who wanted their crush thinking they liked someone else? I mean, I do like Jeno as well, Renjun reasoned pointlessly.

"Um, I'm just about ready to go if you are, Junnie." Renjun smiled, still wondering if Jaemin was faking cluelessness, and went to walk beside him after they had both bid their farewells to Jungwoo. They walked outside and Jaemin looked at Renjun, puzzled. "Where's your jacket? did you leave it inside?" Renjun tried to keep his slight shivers to himself, but it proved to be difficult and he relented with an unpleasant chatter of his teeth. The wind was blowing Jaemin's hair into unruly tufts on his head — and he still looked good.

Renjun wetted his lips and blinked, snapping out of it. "I — uh, I didn't bring one."

"Oh god, you're so dumb." Jaemin ran a hand down his face, stressed. "You're obviously freezing. I would love to be all cliche and give you my jacket, but then I would be cold, so that defeats the purpose." Renjun laughed, his heart thudding because it was considered cliche for couples to give their jackets to one another.

"Hold up, I think I have a jumper in the car." Renjun tried to refuse the offer, but Jaemin simply wouldn't let him. He told him they could stand in the staff parking for the next half hour arguing or Renjun could don the white jumper and get in the car so that they could leave. So Renjun tried not to make it be too obvious he was deeply enjoying the strongly Jaemin-scented jumper; coffee and firewood and something else, like a particular deodorant. This must have been what Jaemin had worn to the beach. He inconspicuously threw an arm over his face, to "block out the lights" — breathing in the scent lightly.

This was the quietest car ride the two had shared as of yet, with Renjun practically falling asleep and Jaemin driving carefully in the darkening evening — no music, just the rumble of tyres on gravel and the soft breathing that filled their ears. In Jaemin's presence, Renjun had already forgotten about the near-disaster that had just fallen out back at Empathy.

Renjun wanted to live like this for the rest of his life.

***

oh look, finally a decent sized chapter

anyway quick shout out to all the guys who've suffered domestic and sexual abuse. its less common but it still happens and its a known fact that men that are r*ped and groped receive less visibility and are taken less seriously. so its always okay for anyone to speak up.