December was a harsh period for him. Not just because of the miserable cold that he ever so dreaded, but also because of the memories it resurfaced in his mind. The time he used to enjoy no longer appealed to him; hearing the laughter of small children, the hearth of every home warming his heart, and the festivity and bright lights relighting the spark in his eyes he had lost not long ago.

Hope and joy was what he truly desired but instead all he felt was that every single bone in his body ached and that his sullen mind was hollow.

So as he walked through the barren streets, the sight of one of his friends from the music industry didn't cause his lips to raise, but instead caused his heart to sink further. He bit down on his bottom lip to keep himself from trembling in the cold. The only thing he had to keep him warm was his black hoodie and sweats - the same thing he had worn for the past few months.

When his eyes landed on his friend, they quickly averted down to his feet. He quickened his pace to make sure that he would not be able to spot him. His luck had obviously run out because he heard the call of his name.

"Luke!"

He stopped in his tracks, closing his eyes and pursing his lips; letting a small huff of visible air out in annoyance. He was in the midst of crossing the road, and now stood in the middle of it, he ignored the honk of a car that impatiently and eagerly wished to pass through the small neighborhood. Casually strolling off to the sidewalk where his friend was, he stuffed his hands into his pockets to keep warm.

"How have you been? I haven't seen you in ages." His friend smiled widely as he approached.

"I'm fine." Luke replied grimly. "And you?" His attempt to be polite despite everything came out forced.

"I've been good! Thanks for asking." His expression changed quickly from ecstatic to weary in a split second. "Oh, I'm so sorry for what happened. I can't imagine what it's like for you. It was truly heartbreaking to hear, I hope you're doing well now." His friend rambled, feet fidgeting uncomfortably.

Luke winced once he was reminded of it. "I already said that I'm fine." He spat, letting his anger take over once again.

His friend furrowed his brows in confusion and took a small step back. "Sorry, bro, I was just worried about you."

Luke sighed and ran his ice-cold fingers through his flattened hair. "I kind of lied, I'm not exactly fine," he paused when he realized he had forgotten the name of his 'friend'. He quickly coughed to cover up his mistake. "I gotta go, see you around." Spinning around, he walked the opposite direction and didn't wait for his friend-who's-name-he-forgot could answer.

He must have spun around too abruptly because his vision was suddenly masked with blackness. It was as if his head was pulsing through his skull, inducing a dull headache. Luke shut his eyes tight to try and pinched the bridge of his nose to relieve the pressure, which only mildly helped.

For him, the headaches were a relatively new and frequent occurrence. He didn't want to make a huge fuss about it after what had happened with the band, but that didn't stop him from worrying that there might be something wrong with him. Luke hated feeling weak, and mostly he hated having to rely on others to solve the problems that belonged to him.

Sucking in a deep breath to get the oxygen flowing throughout his body, he quickly strode away. Cold air went up his nose, making Luke shiver and wonder how it was possible that snow hadn't fallen yet.

Fumbling with his phone that was buried in his pocket, he managed to pull it out with his stiff fingers. Checking on his recent calls, the most recent one - that wasn't from his mom - was from five months ago. He mentally prepared himself and pressed the portion that would let him hear the voice of a person he hadn't heard from since the incident.

It took a few seconds, but the other line finally picked up.

"Calum?"

❆ ❆ ❆

Calum was out again when Luke called.

He had acquired the habit of going out every night, finding some girl that would sleep with him, and waking up the next day only to repeat the heartless task. When there was daylight, he would just walk aimlessly around town, searching for something he knew didn't exist anymore.

He was used to his phone being silent - the only notification he got was the occasional tweet or direct message from an old fan, wondering if they were all okay. Calum had slowly become accustomed to lying to those caring fans; but only because he knew he had to. If everyone out there knew they were all slowly dying inside, it would only make matters worse.

Calum was the only one left in the band who updated his Twitter and Instagram. Although his posts had drastically changed, they were still reminders to everyone that he was okay - on the outside. He hated leaving the people that brought them so far to a dead end.

But inside, he knew the truth. He hated the fans for what they did.

He was going through the same thoughts he did everyday when his phone buzzed. He had forgotten the feeling of someone genuinely wanting to talk to him. Stopping off to the side of the sidewalk, he dug into the deep pockets of his sweats. Once he pulled his phone out, his eyes widened greatly at the caller ID.

Luke Hemmings.

Calum was shocked, to say the least. He fumbled with his phone for a while, not knowing whether or not it would be worth it to pick it up. Well, he thought. It's been five months, it must be important.

He hesitantly pressed accept call, raising the phone to his ear.

"Calum?" The voice rang through, causing his mind to run blank. "Mate?" Luke asked after Calum didn't reply.

"Luke." Calum breathed out, missing the sound of his friend name on his tongue.

"We need to talk, please." He pleaded, leaving Calum confused.

"Then talk." He stated, simply.

"In person." Luke added. Calum shuffled his feet nervously, what was so important that they needed to talk to each other in person for?

"Where are you?" For all he knew, Luke could be across the whole entire world and Calum would have no idea.

"I'm in Detroit." That surprised Calum, he would have expected him to be in Sydney, where his family was.

"I'm in Washington." Calum replied, feeling Luke's question before he could say it. "Washington's two states above California, dumbäss." His old antics were starting to appear again.

"I know." Luke snapped, "I was going to ask why you were there."

Calum shrugged, but realized that Luke couldn't see him. "It isn't so full of people, but it's also close enough so that I don't forget." The line was silent for a moment, so Calum asked, "Why are you in Detroit?"

"It's cold." Luke said without elaboration. "Meet me at the LA airport tomorrow at four, okay?"

"Okay." Calum huffed out, watching his breath turn into visible vapor. "Are you going to call - "

"No." Luke blurted, quickly. "I'll tell him later."

Calum furrowed his brows. "Alright, see you."

Luke hung up, leaving Calum to wonder what had gone so wrong that he had to call him after five whole months.

❃ ❃ ❃

hey! so this is the beginning woooo!!!!

it's kind of short, but the chapters will get longer :) let me know what you guys think, who's missing?

this is such a sad story to write but i just thought of it all the sudden and was like, why not make you guys cry !!1!

hope i didnt bore y'all to death & u keep reading ok ok