Today has been a really fucking shitty day. To be honest, it started last night.

Okay, so my work gives me a lot of anxiety. Why? I have no idea. Probably because I'm forced to do nothing but talk to people for 5 1/2 hours straight. Anyways, I started getting anxiety last night and literally had nightmares about work (it happens more often then I'll admit). The first half of today was okay. I just listened to music and did some homework, but then my anxiety started coming back. All I wanted to do was go to sleep. I worked myself into a fucking panic attack so bad that taking Xanex and calling my therapist didn't work. I had to go to work though, so I got in the car and guess what I did? I backed straight into a fucking car that was parked in the road. It was in perfect visibility, I just couldn't think straight so I didn't even check. So now a fucking dent is gonna cost my family $1,200-1,500 that we don't have. Anyway, I had my mom drive me to work because at this point I'm an even worse wreck and I go in and thank god my boss is nice. She let me have the night off, since I was probably going to just be a liability anyway. Now my suicidal thoughts are back because honestly I just don't want to deal with life anymore. Probably just going to sleep it off though because I'm a fucking wimp.

Moral of the story: don't have a panic attack then drive.