I hate that things aren't the same. And they probably never will be.

We went from talking every day, knowing everything about each other and being completely honest with each other, to not talking for MONTHS. Now, you say you forgive me, but things don't feel right. That bond isn't there anymore. I feel like I can't talk to you like I used to and it hurts so fucking bad because I care about you so damn much. I was so fucked up after we stopped talking I was almost hospitalized. And now we barely talk and it's not the same. I almost wish we didn't talk at all so I could just live in those days when everything was great, and not think about how things have changed and it's my fault. I miss talking for hours on end, I miss your weird jokes and learning everything about you, I miss watching videos of my playing drums or guitar. I miss you. I'm sorry I mess everything up.