I wrote this for you, and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m afraid of your attitude, and I can’t imagine how I’ll feel when I receive your response to my message. will you still there and talk with me like these days, or ignore it all, I feel like I’m bothering you when you’re in this state.
I talked too much, and I don’t know if any of it stayed in your mind. I didn’t even know what you were thinking, and that made me feel deeply sad. Sometimes, even when you were right next to me, I couldn’t feel your presence, it felt like you were somewhere else. For a while, I felt like you were just waiting for time to pass, like you were killing time and slowly forgetting about me. It made me feel invisible.
I tried to create some interaction, but it only seemed to make things worse. I’m not ready to text you because I don’t know how you would react or what your attitude would be like. I want to see you, to talk with u so badly, cant describe how was it, the atmosphere between you and me now hurts me so deeply, I’ve never escaped from problems before, but this time, I’m truly sorry for disappearing today, even though I really didn’t want to. There was nothing else I could do.
You’re going to Quang Tri for work, and there won’t be much time for me to be by your side. I know learning is important it’s necessary for the future and for personal growth, and of course, I understand and respect that. I don’t want to become a barrier to you. What hurts me is that it will be a long time before I can see you again, and I’m afraid that we still haven’t fully understood each other. For me, I stay as long as you still need me. I still see myself as someone who is with you, a part of you. I’m really scared of the feeling that I might mean nothing to you, because I love you so much.
To be honest, I don’t like how you’ve been treating me recently. But what hurts even more is the state you’re in now. I can’t tell whether you’re comfortable or not, but I know you’re not in a good state. All I want is to see you happy, confident — and loved by me, too.
I’m so sorry for my strong feelings.