'Come up to meet you
tell you I'm sorry
tell you I set you apart'

                                      ~coldplay

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The dry leaves crunched dead under the soles of my shoes, just like my grit as I tripped out of the car.

A faint cold breeze nuzzled my skin but instead of feeling fresh, a wretched shiver rushed down my spine. Instead of feeling free, I feel stiflingly trapped.

The ride was infuriatingly long, I could just sense the thick anticipation flowing in the air with the dark fabric covering my sight. Yes, that bloody fungi head blindfolded me. An obscure smell of muskeg fogging the air, clearing the illusion of any living plantation.

I could hear the deep rumbling in the sky as if encouraging me to run. Taking in the deepest breathe that my lousy lungs could handle, my feet hurriedly strode ahead before I could arbitrate the right direction as if they desire to be free more than myself.

They didn't even cover three clear steps when a brawny palm landed flat on my left cheek as I stumbled on the ground.

It was a cold sensation yet hard, my hand hastily reached over to feel it and that's when the hot ringing sting of pain slithered in. The satin cloth felt heavy with the patches of unwilling tears flooding from my eyes.

"Don't. I repeat don't ever try redo this stupidity." his deep voice reverberated with strong blow of wind, he continued running his thumb over the band aid on my shoulder, "They've already inserted a locator chip inside you. Even if you manage to ran to remote city in the opposite side of the world, I will track you. You cost me almost a million."

He grabbed my jaw hard, his voice grumbled from deep within his throat, "You, your body, your soul, your everything, belong to me now. Do you understand me?"

Let me clear it for you mister, I may sit with certain group of people and sense enjoyment it their company or might feel exhilarated to an extent but, as for my belongingness, I entirely relate to my whole self and this man here needs to know that.

The howling of the wind was getting harder with extending the pale lightning in the sky and the vague drops of rain muzzled my skin.

When I didn't reply, he shook my jaw harder, "Do you understand or not? Answer me!"

Who does he think he is? Did I told him to do this?

Clenching my teeth, I faced sideways, tugging my chin out of his grasp, "Oh I see now, you're that feisty bitch, huh?" he chuckled, iniquity radiating from his tone, "I'm going to tell you one thing, print that in your mind. You either submit to me or you will submit to me, no other way around but..." when I still didn't respond, he continued, "...if you still fail to do, I'll personally make your life a living hell."

The fuming heat boiled inside my arteries, reaching the pinnacle of my head, so ready to overflow me, as I muttered, "Asshole."

A thunder-clap resonated, drumming from deep beneath the wistful woolly clouds as rebellious raindrops escape from it. Completely ex nihilo, out of nothing but still has an eternal origin.

"What, did you just say?" he asked, grinding his teeth hard enough to powder his molars.

Maybe the roaring from empyrean overlapped my words that he didn't quite hear me.

"Assho- " my words were never completed as a hand connected again with my left cheek, imprinting into the stinging redness and I winced horribly.

Didn't he saw any other place beside it, you know my right cheek is there for a reason.

I held up my fingers, feeling the swell as a little touch would ring a jolt of electrifying pain through my nerves. A choir of sobs began to rise unrhythmically in my throat.

You better stop them where they are, you're stronger than this.

Tugging out the cloth I turned my gaze threateningly to him and stretched my arms fisting but just when it was about to land on face, he halted my wrist, capturing it in the midway. "If you didn't stop acting like bitch, I swear I'll make this even harder for you. Do you hear me? You're mine, my escrava."

Damn, you have to fight Thunder, because that's what you do.

Snatching my hand from his hold, I retaliated back, "Keep saying that, maybe you'll feel better but you don't know what fanatical bitch you've crossed path with. I'll get away from here soon and find that naked-head Jones, then you- "

"Mr Jones ah, a good business partner and oh..." he shook his head, a knowing smirk started creeping over his lips, "...now that you've mentioned, I remember him boasting about his glory, how you and your little friend- " sensing my uneasiness, he desisted for a second, leering with a smug smile, "Oh, did I hit a spot hm? Aren't you desperate to know where she could be right now?"

My whole body jiggled as I immediately turned to study his face, not caring about the despair painted on my dial.

The heavy raindrops sinking his lashes but it was not the wet seaweed creeping out from his head, it was his dark onyx eyes stared back at me pure devastation, the blackness in them slowly enveloping the white.

"Aw, don't make that face, I will tell you. I'll tell you how he dragged her bloodied body into the shore. How he barred her lifeless form into a coffin." It felt like a second alarm, ringing and knocking you out of your own space.

The pile of mutinous sobs that was chained behind a facade of valours girl was struggling to escape.

Triumphantly, he continued, "I'll tell you how he dumped that blood-pooled corpse deep in the sea. And you know why she's there? It's all because of you."

"No..."

"Oh yes, think about it escrava, Jones told me about your little stunt and your friend..." he chuckled while running his tongue over his teeth, "she died saving your stupid ass. Trust me, it's all because of you."

Ever so slowly, the agonising perception dawned on me as the breathe frantically running out from my still form. The aching pain was exhilarating, pulsating through each and every cell in my body.

My mind was reeling back, shaking uncontrollably and my vision tunneled, mercilessly rewinding the dreadful scene again, and again.

All I could feel was narcissism radiating from me. All I could see was her warm brown eyes staring right through my tainted soul.

Another growl erupted between the clouds, heavy droplets of icy water poured down soaking into my sore flesh, trying to ease the throb. Trying to wash and drain my sins but all it does was dampen my hair.

He hauled my drenched body inside by my hair like a lost rag doll who was left forgotten in the park.

I didn't have the time to inspect the surroundings as my legs felt limp like boiled noodles, all I saw was big gigantic walls that was screaming to swallow me whole, the humongous airy hall which was promising to suffocate me and the colossal windows tightly closed which were staying loyal to his owner, not letting a single scream to flee.

Even the polished marble floor looked brighter than my future.

I was too unaesthetic to fight back. I can hear the clanking of chains after he tossed me into a room but the door never locked.

A bloodied light was dimming the space giving a contrasting effect to the varieties of metals hung, decorating the room.

I can hear them whispering unholy secrets to me.

He took a last sinful step forward, covering the distant as the sound of unbuckling of belt rung like a final warning.

Four five six, block don't think. One two three, wait pounce free.

And when at last, the stinging whip lashes of pain marked my flesh, I welcomed them. I welcomed the blood-dripping scratches and burns, merrily.

Because I deserve it. I deserve every bit of it. My silent cries were almost drowned under the deluge of the thunder.

A streak of lightning split the sky and lit up the room for a few seconds. As if enunciating which one of us is the mightier.

My heart and body was ripping apart continuously, wrenching painfully, coupled with explicable despair.

There was a series of cursing, strangling, blood, screaming, all blended with haphazard yells from behind the clouds.

And then the numbing pain.

The coldness from the floor beneath me was seeping through my legs, as if trying to soothe the soreness, but all it could offer was crisp. I traced the foreign marble of the floor, liking the friction.

The pull was stronger than gravity like it didn't want to release his hostage.

Every inch of my body was aching, wailing to give up but, my mulish mind was still stone-deaf, still commanding my glacial hands to keep moving and surging the overflowing emotions while enjoying the cold sensations at the tips of my fingers.

'26 October, 2016.'

The words looked real for microsecond before it disappeared into the abyss of time.

Very homogeneous to our lives, for one minute you're living the happiest moment of your life and in the next poof, all wiped into the hollowness, as if it was never there.

Leaving a reminiscence of memories as a souvenir. Just like that, the memories sneak out of my eyes and roll down my cheeks.

I began scratching the phantom words on the marble with my finger tip which were too timid to run out my tongue.

'Dear Kali...I'm sorry.'

Taking in the deepest breathe I could with my shaking body, I resumed, 'For all those countless mistakes that every time dropped you in a compromising situation' unknowingly, a throaty chuckle took off from my sore lungs, 'But still, you were always there.

Every time I was in a rough mood or got into a messy fight or needed a blissful wind to clear my stressed head. I always found you right beside me holding a tub of ice-cream.'

I sniffered, a smile creeps on my dry lips as I hastily wiped the lacrimal fluid from my cheeks, 'maybe you didn't give me sloppy kisses and bone-crushing hugs, although your smacks always crushed my backbone. But I felt your love, I felt it wrapped inside your ear splitting lectures. I felt it in your mocking eye rolls, hell I even felt it when you clench your teeth, your death glares...everything. I can still feel it. And I...' my eyes were getting heavy and a single tear touched the floor over my evaporated words, 'I don't want it to end, ever.

Because that's the only thing which is keeping through it.

Not only when I was stuck behind my family or when I was struggling to figure out life, but also right now at this very moment.

I waited for the torture to end, for the whiplashes to let tired. I'm waiting for the monster inside him to give in, I waited for him to stop, but he stole from me what people call innocence.

And I'll be still fucking waiting for the right moment to act.

I wanted to blame you for teaching me hold on and to think the circumstances in every different way. And you know what? I'm bloody doing just exactly what you taught me. Think, wait then think again, everything will fall back to place.

And...that is how I'm keeping you alive Kali. You might me dead but will always be alive, with me, in me. Always.

I miss you so much.

Deadly Yours,

Thunda.'

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*spoiler alert ~ are you ready to meet Halcyon Stone in the next chapter?* ;)))))

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