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CHAPTER 42

My dad and I are spending the day together today. We decided to drive to the town over and explore a new environment. We just finished lunch and are making our way over to this bakery called Bel Ami Pastries. Supposedly, they're known for their chocolate chip-filled croissants.

We each order one and grab a table outside on the sidewalk. I already filled my dad in on my conversation with my mom. Like I knew he would be, he was really happy to hear that I'm willing to give our relationship the chance that it deserves. My dad has always supported my decisions because he trusts me, and I know that he wanted this for me. I respect him even more for that. I can't imagine how hard it must've been to raise a child alone or lose the person he thought he was going to spend forever with, but I'm also not worried about him. I know that he's happy and I also know that he'll find even greater happiness in the future.

"What's going on with you and Jack?" dad asks me.

"Nothing," I answer as I peel apart the croissant. "I found out he kissed Jordana."

"While you two were together?"

"No. We were broken up, but still. It's his ex. And it's her. She's not a good person. Doesn't he know that by now?"

"Honey, I'm not discrediting your feelings, and you have every right to be hurt, but Jack didn't betray you. And it doesn't sound like he lied, either."

"He didn't. But that doesn't mean that it hurts any less."

Dad simpers at me and then says, "Maybe that's because you're in love with him."

I bring my head up and look at my dad. "Yeah, well being in love sucks. It doesn't make any sense to me."

Dad starts laughing and I can't help but smile at his reaction. It's good to see him like this.

"It never does," he says.

"Great," I sarcastically mutter. "I just want to know if he thinks about me the way I do him? I mean, I hope he does. He doesn't even have to think long. Taking up even just a second of his thoughts is enough for me."

"Yup," dad smiles, "you're definitely in love with him."

"So, help me, dad. What do I do about it?"

"Go get him, Stassie. Don't wait another second."

***

I didn't want to rush my day with my dad, but he was insistent that I go see Jack, so I had him drop me at his house. I'm not even sure if he's home right now.

After I ring the doorbell, I think about whether or not I should've texted him to give him a heads up that I was stopping by, but it's too late for that now, I guess.

The door opens and I'm relieved to see Jack standing on the other side of it, despite the fact that he seems stunned to see me. "Stas, what are you doing here?"

I don't say anything back and immediately go in to kiss him. It's an instinct that I don't even have time to think about. I just know that I have to do it.

The way that he kisses me back tells me that he feels the same way that I do.

I finally pull away from him and he smiles at me with closed lips. "I missed you," he tells me, and those 3 words are exactly what I needed to hear right now.

He takes my hand and walks us into his house. I look out the tall window that lends view to the beautiful backyard and notice a bunch of workers setting up a tent. And that's when I remember that his dad's birthday party is this weekend.

"Don't mind the noise," Jack tells me. "They've been setting up for the party all week."

I squint my eyes at him and then say, "Why don't you seem excited?"

"Because I'm not." He tugs my hands, pulling me into him, and his palms find the top part of my arms, rubbing them up and down. "You're coming, right?"

"To the party? Jack, I can't."

"Why not?"

"I don't really think that I'm top on the list of people your dad wants at his birthday party."

"That's not true."

"Jack," I state, skewing my lips.

"It's a big party."

"So, what? You think he won't notice that I'm there?"

"Well, no. You stand out in a crowd," he says, coming in to kiss me again. "But it would mean a lot to me if you came."

I take a few seconds to respond, even though I already know what I want to say. "Okay. I'll come. But only for you."

"Thank you," he smiles, kissing me again.

We take a seat on the couch in the living room, our knees facing each other. "I'm sorry for the way that I reacted the other day. About Jordana..."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I should be the one apologizing. I never want to hurt you, Stas, but you have to know that she doesn't mean a thing to me. You had just told me you wanted a break, and I was so upset, and Jordana...she was just there. It's no excuse, but you have to believe me when I say that you're the only thing I think about. All I want to do is call you mine." He shakes his head. "Who knew 4 simple letters could be so complicated?"

I reach for his hand and intertwine our fingers. "I am yours, Jack. I don't want to be anybody else's. But I want you to want to be mine back, too."

"Stas," he says, shifting his body even more toward me, "I was yours from the first day that we met at the library."

"Even when you were being a pain in my ass?"

"Even then," he says, bringing our interlaced fingers together and planting a kiss on the palm of my hand. "Especially then."

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