This chapter contains material that is not suitable for very young readers.

Please keep an open mind. This is a BxB book. (Gay couples, Bi couples) If you don't like it don't start reading this. Thanks. :)

Nathan Miller

I woke up in the middle of the night and it was hard. Why? Just because I was on a bed I coudn't recognize and a man I didn't know.

"Let me go!" I was about to jump out of bed when that man grab my arm and push me down on the bed. He was quick to stradle me and the next thing I felt were fingers.

"Ahh!!!" I screamed and he covered my mouth as I struggled off him. No! I'll die here! No. No! Calm down Nathan! No I can't! Not when fingers were getting shove down my fuckin' ass!

"Shh.. Calm down!" How can I?! He press all his weight on me and I couldn't barely move. I was scratching his back but I guess that was nothing to him because he is not budging!

"Stop! S-stop.. Please.." I can't believe it! I'm crying? "ah.." I sniffed and he just licked my tears off my cheek. He press his fingers deep and I shivered. Oh! what was that?

"shhh.. I won't hurt you. I'm just making you remember." I smelt something.. sweet.

"N-no.. Nn-ah!" I gasp when he hit that spot again and this time over and over again. I trembled furiously and he grined something hard and warm against me.

"Nathan..." He was rubbing his thing with mine!! No fucking way! I will-- oh God!

"There.." I didn't just cum? No way..

"Let me go.." I was panting.

"Not yet. I can't let you cum alone right?" I gasp and winced when he plunge in me. Thrusting deep in me with just one push. I screamed when he did.

"It hurts.." My whole body tensed and he stilled.

"Still too tight. Not even used to it huh? Guess one night isn't enough." He said and he pushed down my tighs and thrust his pull length in me. I gasp again and I think he tore me in half.

"Please stop! It hurts!! Fuck!! It hurts!!!" I screamed with all my might but I couldn't move. He's not letting me.

"Listen. Relax or it won't stop hurting! Breathe! Fucking breathe Nate!" Nate? I blinked and let out the breath I was holding in. I blinked my tears and eyed this stranger. He knew my name. He even called my nickname. Who is this guy? I blinked again and I saw blured blue eyes.

"Evan..." I stiffened when he pulled half his length and thrust deep.

"There you go again! Fuck relax!"

"Don't move so I can fucking relax!"

"So you finally remember then?" He slowly pulled half again and thrust slowly in me. I winced but I tried to relax like he said. It does hurts less.

"Evan please stop.. Nn.. Moving!" I grab his arms, feeling his muscle tighten under my hands.

"No. What happened last night Nate? Tell me." He grab my waist and continued to do me so slowly... Shit! Why is he torturing me?!

"Last.. Night?" I grip onto his arms then reach onto his broad shoulders.

"Tell me Nate." He thrust deep and hit that spot that made me gasp and moan out his name. Making him loose control. He grip onto my hips and pounded that spot in me.

"Shit! Evan! Evan stop!! Evan I'll break! E-evan!!!" He groaned and grunted like an animal and drop his head on my neck. This is it. This is what happen last night.

He broke me.

Because I love him.

**Evan did not technically force Nate, he knew what was going on but was incoherent because he can't see and was having a hangover. Nathan was the first to initiate, like what's said, Evan is making him remember. He got carried away and ended up hurting them both.***

*********

"Nate? Shh.. Please.. Please don't cry anymore. Please."

"It hurts... It hurts... Hik.. It hurts.." He tried to touch me but I just flinch and sob more.

"Nathan.."

I curled myself into a ball, hugging my body.

"Nathan..." I look up and saw him. He was staring at his hands. That's when I notice his bleeding arms. I scratched him all over his arms and chest. I bet he has more on his back. But that nothing compared to what he did.

"Nate.." I flinch again when he reach out and I sobbed louder when he grab my wrist.

"No.. No more, Evan! It fucking hurts... It hurts... Your kind of Love hurts." He looked mad.. He looked really mad and it scared me.

"E-eva--" He was so mad of hisself.

*slaaap!*

"Evan stop!!" He was using my hand to hit himself. He was making me slap him.

"Hit me. Hurt me too! Nathan hurt me please!!" He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in his lap.

"I'm sorry"

He completely engulped me. It was so scary how can he easily take me. Overpower me.. And hurt me all at the same time.

"This will be the last time..

.. Because this kind of Love hurts."

I look up and he was crying. Just like I was. He stood up and grab his clothes. He dress up like nothing happened and left my apartment.

Evan.. How could you?

"How dare you?!"

********

I am Jonathan Miller, 21 and am legally blind.

I am not totally blind. I can still see but you have to get really close to me. My vision started to deteriorate when I was 10.. now my vision is almost just blured lights and figures. I can't work well because of that. My parents supports me and even though it's embarrassing, I have to accept their help.

Then there is Evan.

Evan is actually my best friend since we were in diaphers. Our families are great friends. We are like brothers but then.. Things change when he confessed.

"Nate, I'm gay."

"Hmm.."

"Nate are you listening? Are you not blind anymore and already deaf? I said I'm Gay!"

"Gay?" I eyed him. His silhoutte is the same. I came closer to him to see him clearly. Evan is all man. He is tall and toned. Very masculine. He is the very definition of it. You can't see any ounce of doubt that he is as straight as a pole. So I laughed.

"Sure Evan." He looks pissed. Evan had this issue when he is pissed. He has anger issues but its not that bad. He just tends to scream in your face or if you scream in his face he'll definitely pounce at you.

"Fuck it, Nate! I am fucking Gay because of you! I am fucking in Love with you!" He panted and strom off my room. That's what scares me. Being alone. I lived with Evan all my life.He is always beside me. If not he'll take me to my family. He never leaves my side because he knows I'll freak out.

"Evan? Evan I'm sorry this is not funny. I swear Evan! I'll listen! Evan come back!" I squint my eyes to look better. I can see the door so I went towards it. I can still remember this house well but I still can't see where I was going.

"Evan.." I felt for the wall with my shaking palms and walk slowly.

"Evan come back..." I saw the stairs and went down slowly.

"Evan!" My knees are shaking and I finally missed a step.

"Nathan! Why the hell did you get out?!"

"Evan!" I grab his shirt and hugged him. His heart beat was so fast. I can hear it thumping against his chest.

"Don't leave me. I was so scared you left."

"Nate.. Fuck.." He hugged back almost squishing my frail body. I feel so small against his built. How can he say he is Gay for me? He loves me? How can he fell in love with me when I am a man?

**************

Evan Hudson

"What shall I do with him.. I can't even leave him alone for a second! He even fall down the stairs! Fuck... Just.. " I don't know what to do with him anymore.

"He fell down?"

"No, I caught him before he hurt himself."

"Hmm.. That's because he got used to it. Being protected by the mighty Evan Hudson." Jacob replied. Jake is the only one I can talk to about this. He understands me more than anyone would. He is my brother and he is also, Gay. Bisexual really because I always saw him with random girls and guys in different occasions.

I'm loosing my mind. I am head over heals in Love with a man. A man who is as fragile as thin porcelaine.

"Now what? After I confessed he laughed at me. He thought I was joking for heavens sake! Ugh!"

"Evan relax. If I was him I would laugh at your face as well. Like hello, not one part of you screams 'Gay' not even 'Bi' in my book." He lit a cigarette and blew out some smoke. I sighed and he shook his head at me.

"You're hopeless Evan. We are both hopeless with Love." He handed me a stick of cigarette and I smoke with him.