Jason

"How's she doing?" I asked Thalia nervously.

"Fine." Thalia was scanning all the recent Capitol News tapings. 

Thalia and I didn't necessarily hate each other. Here in District 13 where everyone was all about teamwork, it was hard to openly hate someone who was in your training group.

Yet everyone but me managed to do it to Vena anyway.

Jerome also openly hated me, but Mitch and Thalia simply put up with me to a certain degree. In cases like this, I went to Thalia to vent about my worries. She understood better than Mitch about my worries concerning Snow.

"Are you sure?" I asked for the twentieth time.

"Yes Jason. She seems to be eating fine and there's no sign of torture." Thalia paused. "She just seems...not like herself."

"Not like herself how?"

"She's just, I don't know, she's more angry than confident."

"Okay?"

Thalia glared at me. "That's unusual for her." She snapped. Her tone was condescending. 

"Okay." I said simply.

"You're impossible." Thalia groaned throwing her hands up in exasperation. She stood and walked away from me briskly. No doubt she was going to find someone to rant to about my stupidity.

"Nice seeing you too." I muttered under my breath. I watched the Capitol News Tapings myself. 

Snow did seem weird. 

Almost like she wasn't herself.

Snow

"How are you Miss Pristeen?" A Capitol attendant rushed into the room nearly seconds after I woke up.

"I'm fine." I said coldly.

"Can I get you anything? Water? A change of clothes perhaps? Order breakfast or-"

"I said I'm fine." I snapped as I put on my black training gloves. All of a sudden, my left side twitched violently. "Thank you. Please leave now." I heard myself say. "Tell Coriolanus I'll be in the training room in twenty minutes. I don't want an attendee in there."

"Yes Miss Pristeen." The attendant bowed before fleeing the room. 

I walked over to the mirror on the other side of my room and stared at my reflection. If you looked carefully, you could see scars on several places. A few peeked out from beyond my gloves on my knuckles. A small one ran across my left temple. If I turned around and moved my hair to the side, you'd notice the long, not quite healed scar that traced my neck. 

With a low sigh, I picked up the dagger that lay on my bedside table. My nerves tingled as I turned the blade in my hands. Like before, my hand twitched slightly. The doctors here called it PTSD. They said that even though my mind couldn't recall the memories of the arena very well, my body remembered every last detail. I'd seen the tapes though. I watched I had gone through. Heck, President Snow had shown me the videos of the Games so often they were practically my memories. For weeks I'd analyzed my competitors in the arena. Tracking their strengths and weaknesses so I'd have the upper hand. 

Slowly, I put the dagger down and instead picked up the pen next to it. My skin became my canvas as I doodled over it. Of course the Capitol had actual professional canvases I could use, but I preferred my own body. It seemed more personal that way. 

I glanced at the clock frequently, careful to not lose track of time like I had done many times before. When I was left with five minutes, I put my pen back next to the dagger and stood. 

No one tried to talk to me as I walked down the halls toward my training room. Few people ever did. Even the attendants were scared of me (as they should be). I respected that. Some officials from higher position whom had worked with me before gave me a nod of the head as I passed (which I returned) but avoxes and mere servers just pressed themselves against the opposite wall. 

My training room was large but not grand or extravagant. I prefered it that way. Everything was organized. Archery in one area, throwing knives in another, hand to hand combat, guns, everything I needed in its own little section. Not many people had access to this area. Usually it was just me and the occasional attendee in here. On rare occasions, war officials came in to watch me train and ask me questions. Usually about what I thought concerning war strategies.

All of these thoughts filled my mind as I strolled into the spear section. My eyes lingered on a small, dainty, narrow one. The etched patterns on the shaft looked familiar though I couldn't place the design. But the moment my fingers brushed it, images flooded my mind.

"Thalia's right. We have to help her."

"Why? What has she ever done for us?"

For a mere a second, I was back in the training room. I knew those voices. I'd heard them in my mind several times before. Jerome and Mitch. Thalia was with them. I knew this memory.

"I haven't done anything for you." My voice was crackly. "If you killed me right now, you'd be doing me a favor. But I promised, I promised I'd stay alive....for her."

"We can trust her. She wouldn't try to kill us anyway, she's too weak right now." Jerome argued.

"Weak." An understatement. "I'm not weak, I'm broken."

I was back in the training center. The spear had clattered onto the ground.

I felt strong arms pick me up and carry me bridal style.

Get up Snow. Kick the crap out of him. Stab him. Stab all of them. Run before they can hurt you. Run before you can fall for him.

"Everything's going to be okay Snow. You'll be okay." 

Lies. He's a liar. You'll never be okay if you don't realize that you need to stab the hell out of him. 

Oh how I wish I could change my past.

Tears were running down my face.

Jerome slowly reached up and gently wiped away a few of my tears. I didn't fight it. I was too...broken.

"It'll be okay. Trust me." He murmured softly.

No. NO. You can't trust him. You can never trust him. Don't trust any of them. Leave them all to die. Do what's right. 

I've collapsed onto the ground next. The ground is cold underneath my exposed fingertips. The feeling of Jerome's skin pressed against mine is disappearing. The scent of pine is disappearing. Metallic tastes fill my mouth. The memory is leaving me. It's leaving me the way he left me. 

Wounded.

Damaged.

Broken.

"It won't ever be okay. Never." I said to myself.

The only smart thing I said in that memory.

"Snow." 

It's not Jerome's voice. This voice is deeper but less stable. Almost as if it's someone who hasn't spoken in years and is finally trying out their new voice.

But it's still a voice I recognize very well.

Jason

"You should really get some rest. You've been holed up here all night." Thalia argued as she sat down next to me.

"Beetee doesn't know when the security cameras' firewall will recover. We need to be watching this 24/7 for any information possible." I responded.

"That's very true, but in case you haven't noticed, there are people who are supposed to be here. Whose jobs are to be here."

"Good to know, don't really care." I mumbled as my eyes flickered over the screens yet another time. Okay, maybe the night had been uneventful. All Snow had done was sleep and yell at some people. 

I missed her so goddamn much. It hurt so bad. So what if that girl wasn't my Snow? She still looked like my Snow. I could still pretend she was my Snow. Every fibre of being wanted to jump through the screens just so I could see her in real life. So what if she'd kill me on sight? It was a small price to pay if I got to see her face to face. Besides, I deserved it.

"Hold on a second." Thalia brought me back to attention. "Pan over to camera ten."

I did as she said. The image of Snow walking in the middle of a training room popped up. It wasn't the first time we'd caught her training. Throughout the numerous times Beetee had managed to hack into the Capitol's systems, we'd gotten quick images of her throwing knives, shooting bows, and firing guns. 

"What about it?" I asked Thalia. "Nothing unusual."

"No, I swear I saw something in that corner near the door. Someone was coming in or something."

"I don't see anyone."

"Can you rewind it?"

"No, this is live footage." I shake my head. "No one else is in the room but..." I trailed off as Snow began to pick up a small spear. I recognized it from my own experience in the Games' training room. She and Jerome were practicing together when she'd first used it. "Hey, do you remember-"

"Oh my god!" Thalia jumped as Snow jerked violently all of sudden. "What the hell? Jason, what's going on?"

"I-I don't know!" I looked around the room at the other cameras to see if anything suspicious was going on to no avail. "What did she do?"

"She just touched the spear!" Thalia yelled in confusion. "Wait, she just dropped it." Thalia squinted at the screen before suddenly jumping back again. "What the hell? Snow just collapsed!"

"What?" I dropped my cup of coffee on the ground and leaned in. "No, no, no. What's wrong with her?"

"How the hell should I know?" Thalia glanced around wildly. "We can't do anything."

A figure sped across the screen. So fast, my eyes barely caught it. Even then, all I could make out was a blurry, tall person-shaped blob trailing across the screen. Too fast to be a human but yet...

The figure was kneeling down next to Snow's motionless body. It was a guy. I could tell that much from the back of his blonde head.

"Can you turn up the volume?" Thalia asked, well, more demanded.

"Yeah." I pressed a few buttons on the control panel in front of me.

"-you okay?" The guy asked. 

Snow slowly shifted. "Totally. I just like laying on the ground for fun." The guy laughed and helped her up.  

Thalia and I exchanged looks. What was this side of Snow?

"Does he...sound familiar to you?" Thalia prompted. 

"I don't think so." I was too busy paying attention to the way the stupid guy was wrapping his arms around Snow's waist.

"Dude, he's helping the girl up. Get over yourself." Thalia rolled her eyes. She stared closer at the screen. "I swear."

"Probably just the son of some official."

"Another memory attack?" The boy asked Snow. 

She nodded. "It was the one of Jerome in the woods."

"I'm sorry." The guy frowned. "Really, I am. You didn't deserve that."

"It whatever." Snow shrugged nonchalantly. "I mean, yeah it sucks." She laughed. "But it lasts a minute a most and then it's gone."

"Not the memory attacks, although you don't deserve those either." The guy smiled sadly at her. "I mean the way those guys treated you."

"It was the Games." Snow shook her head. "I don't know why I expected anything different. The whole point is killing one another. It's not exactly a romanced based TV show."

"Okay, this is going to sound really stupid." The guy laughed. "Bear with me. I'm not the most romantic guy in the world."

"Understatement." Snow's laughed matched his.

"Alright, alright." The guy held up his hands in surrender before placing one of them on Snow's waist.

Anger surged through me.

"All I'm trying to say is," the guy brushed a lock of hair out of Snow's eyes. "I'm really glad you didn't die in the arena."

"Ditto." Snow giggled.

Yes.

Giggled.

The guy was now angled so we could see his face. Unfortunately, Snow's head was in the way. 

"I guess I should get back to training." Snow sighed. She bent down to pick up her fallen spear.

Curse words flew out of Thalia's mouth.

"Oh. My. God." I muttered as I stared at the screen in disbelief. "No. Way."

"You sure you don't need help?" Kern asked. 

"I'm fine Kern, really, I am." Snow smiled at him. She stood on her tiptoes so she could give him a quick kiss on the cheek. "I'll see you afterwards okay?"

"Movie in theatre room?"

"Sure." Snow nodded happily. "Anything you want."

"I'll miss you." Kern leaned in.

"I'll see you in a couple hours silly." Snow responded.

"It'll feel like an eternity."

"Mr. Romantic huh?" Snow raised an eyebrow. "I'm really happy-"

The screen cut to black.

"No." I murmured. "No!" I screamed. "No way! Thalia! Get Beetee now! Get President Coin! Get General Pristeen or General Pristeen! I don't care, but we need to-"

"Kern's alive." Thalia interrupted.

"Uh, duh!"

"Don't you get it Jason?" She snapped. "That is two dead people who are supposed to be dead that aren't!"

"I know, but-"

"Look, I know you're distracted because Kern and Snow are now making out, but you need to focus."

"They're not making out."

"They're making out you idiot! Get over yourself! We have bigger problems!"

"What are you saying? They're zombies?" I retorted sarcastically.

"I'm saying that we have problems." Thalia glared at me. "Big problems."

"Oh, no, dur. What do you propose we do smartass?" I asked.

"Simple." Thalia shrugged. "We break Snow out of the Capitol."

A/N

This chapter took me flipping forever to write.