Chapter 4

"So... you live here alone?"

I glanced nervously at him. When I first bought this apartment, I was convinced that it's too big for me. The kitchen is spacious and there are two rooms upstairs. Plus, a small walk-in closet and a tub for that matter. But now that Zeus has graced my apartment with his presence, I suddenly felt ridiculous.

This might be too small, too narrow, for his taste.

"Uhm... oo." Sa mahinhin kong boses na sagot. Kanina ko pa pinipilit na pakalmahin ang sarili. I smiled ruefully at him, pointing towards the kitchen. "Do you want something? Coffee? Juice?"

"Coffee will be fine."

He remained standing in the middle of my living room, ignoring the small loveseat chair nearby. In the faint light that was all my place could offer, he looks like someone stripped out from a book. Kulang nalang ay magsilabasan ang mga press upang kunan siya ng litrato na simple lang namang nakatayo sa living room ko. And Zeus standing tall and lean inside my unit makes me feel like he owns everything and I'm just a mere servant.

Napailing ako. Masyado ko na ata siyang sinasamba. My admiration for him has skyrocketed that my heart couldn't contain it anymore. Now every part of him, every little thing about Zeus, I worship and adore.

Akala ko ay mauupo siya sa sala at hihintayin ako na matapos sa pagtitimpla ng kape. But he followed me inside the kitchen. Mas lalo pa atang dumoble ang kaba ko. I glanced at him and saw that he's darkly watching my every move. With a faint, awkward smile, I reached for the cupboard for a mug. I have to raise on my toes because I couldn't reach it by my own. Nagulat nalang ako nang makita ang malaki niyang kamay sa ibabaw ng akin, at siya na mismo ang kumuha sa mug. Natatakot akong lingunin siya sa likod dahil alam kong sobrang lapit lang naming dalawa.

"T-Thanks..."

He placed the two mugs on the kitchen counter and took a step away. I put the kettle on and grabbed the Arabica coffee powder I purchased last week. Tahimik lang ako habang nilalagyan ng asukal at coffee powder ang mga mug. The presence of Zeus behind me is too hard to ignore. Because of the deafening silence, I could hear his ragged breathing and could already imagine the steady rise and fall of his chest.

Humigit ako ng isang malalim na hininga at hinarap siya nang matapos sa ginagawa. He lazily lifted a brow at me as his eyes twinkled in amusement.

"G-Gusto mong manuod ng TV?" nahihiya ko pang tanong sa kaniya.

"It's twelve in the midnight, Naia. I don't think they still have a show going on right now."

"Right..." ngumuso ako at yumuko, hindi alam ang gagawin. I lifted my gaze to him again, only to find him already staring at me. Inani ko ang lakas ng loob at tinanong siya ulit. "Hindi ka pa uuwi?"

Zeus shifted his weight on the balls of his feet and leaned a hip against the counter. He tilted his head and stared at me. "Uuwi?" tanong niya na para bang hindi niya naiintindihan ang salitang iyon.

"Uhm... oo! Kailangan mong umuwi kasi baka... baka may naghihintay sa iyo sa bahay mo... o di kaya baka may gawin ka pa bukas."

"I don't know, Naia. I'm home right now. So why are you sending me away?"

"Zeus!"

The kettle whined loudly. Muntik pa akong mapatalon dahil sa gulat. Inipit ni Zeus ang pang-ibabang labi, na para bang nagpipigil ng ngiti. Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin at padabog na kinuha ang whistle kettle saka isinalin ang mainit na tubig sa mug.

Habang isinasalin ko ang tubig ay nag-iisip din ako ng ibang pwedeng irason ko kay Zeus. I forced myself to calm down when he occupied the space next to me and grabbed the mug.

"Still a little jumpy, aren't we?"

Kinunutan ko siya ng noo. "What are you talking about?" pagmamaang-maangan ko pa.

"You're still scared of me." He said in a low voice, as I slide the mug to his direction.

"I'm not scared!" I told him, my eyes blazing with borrowed confidence.

Zeus chuckled darkly. "I'm not scared..." he mimicked my tiny voice, putting down his mug before the smile on his face faded. He then took a step towards me with the dark look of his. "You're not scared, huh?"

"W-What do you think are you doing right now?"

Napakapit ako sa sink. Ayokong umatras because that will prove his point. But the menacing look in his eyes and the amused smile on his lips are sending me a mini heart attack. When he took another step, I almost fell to the ground. Buti nalang at nakaatras kaagad ako. Halos magtama na ang tungki ng mga ilong namin sa sobrang lapit ng mukha niya.

Zeus leaned back a bit, before he roared into a throaty laughter. "See? You're still scared..."

With cheeks flushing, I glared at him. He jerked his head back and winked at me. I bit back a yelp. I wanted to curse him, but I don't know how. Instead, I just glared at him and sulked like a child in the corner of the kitchen.

My disheartened feelings weren't allowed to linger for a long time when a shriek tore from my throat as the thunder roared wildly from a distance. Zeus glanced at the rattling windows and the strong gust of air that punched inside the unit through the open door. Kasabay ng mga nanginginig kong yapak papunta sa pintuan ay ang malakas na pagbuhos ng ulan.

Mabilis kong isinarado ang pinto at napahinga nang maluwag. The thunder growled and continued to rule the skies as Zeus sipped his coffee on my kitchen calmly. Napangiwi ako. binalikan ko siya sa kusina.

"Ikaw lang ba mag-isa ang nagpunta dito?"

"Yeah."

"Where's your limousine?"

Nag-angat ng kilay si Zeus sa akin. "I don't use it to travel around, Naia."

"Wala kang sasakyang dala?"

"Wala."

Napatikom ang bibig ko. Para akong teenager na hindi mapakali. Hindi rin nakatulong ang maya't mayang ungol ng ulan at malakas na kidlat. Tinitigan ko si Zeus na prente lang na nakasandal sa may kitchen counter at nagkakape. He looks unbothered and has no plan of leaving any moment. Humaba ang nguso ko sa naisip.

I reached for my coffee as another deafening thunder echoed and the lights went off. Nanlaki ang mga mata ko sa sobrang gulat. I froze on the ground as my entire surroundings succumbed into darkness and the rain poured hard outside my windows.

"Power outage." Zeus commented. I could feel him moving. Ayokong ipahalata sa kaniya na natatakot ako kaya naman kinalma ko ang sarili at inisip kung saan ko nga ba inilagay ang mga kandilang pinamili. "Do you have candles?"

"Yeah. N-nasa cupboard ata..."

Hindi ko siya nakikita sa dilim kaya muntik na akong mapasigaw nang maramdamang may mabigat na kamay ang humatak sa beywang ko. As soon as my face hit his chest, his manly perfume assaulted my nose and I inhaled a large dose of it. Doon pa ako kumalma.

"Stay still, Naia." Was all he said. Nakarinig ako ng iilang kaluskos at ang pagbukas-sara ng cupboard. Zeus set down something on the counter and reached for his back pocket, all the while keeping his hands on my waist.

Mayamaya pa ay nagkabuhay na ang dalawang kandila na inilapag niya sa kitchen counter. At the mercy of red light from the candles, Zeus' face appeared in the dark. His thick eyebrow rose lazily.

"These are scented candles..." he said when we both inhaled a large dose of the honeysuckle and lavender scent.

Uminit ang mga pisngi ko sa narinig. "Hindi ko naman kasi alam na mawawalan pala ako ng kuryente."

He glanced at me and nodded, though his eyes are filled with amusement. Sumimangot ako.

"You're hopeless." He said and grabbed the two candles, leading me out of the kitchen.

Para akong batang sumunod sa kaniya patungo sa sala. Inilapag ni Zeus ang dalawang kandila sa table at sinulyapan ako. Kaagad akong nag-iwas ng tingin at naupo sa loveseat chair. He went back to the kitchen, probably to retrieve the mugs of coffee I abandoned earlier. When he came back, he stared at me, and then the unoccupied seat next to me, and then back to my eyes as if asking for permission. Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko kaya tinitigan ko lang din siya pabalik. In the end, he sighed and sat across me.

"I can't sit next to you?"

My cheeks flamed. "B-Bakit? Nagtanong ka ba?"

"Hindi mo ba nakikita sa mga mata ko?" seryoso siyang tumitig sa akin.

I swallowed hard. Umusog ako nang konti at nanghihinang tinapik ang bakante sa tabi ko. "You can sit here."

Zeus chuckled and leaned his face away. Prente siyang sumandal sa upuan. He placed his left leg over his right one, sitting like a king and then staring again at me.

"I won't make anything that would make you feel uncomfortable."

"Ayos lang naman..." mahina kong wika.

"Anong ayos lang?"

Nag-iwas ulit ako ng tingin. I don't want to say it out loud! Nahihiya ako...

"Ayos lang..." pag-uulit ko.

"Ano nga ang ayos lang?"

"Na... na maupo ka sa tabi ko."

He chuckled again, his eyes blazing with amusement. "You know, for someone who's already 26 years old, you act like 16."

My shoulders sagged. See? I really am acting like a teenager right now with him around.

"But it's a good thing. That means my Naia hasn't changed a bit."

I reached for my mug and traced the rim with the end of my fingertips. Itinuon ko ang tingin sa malamig ng kape ngayong hindi ko magawang tingnan siya sa mukha.

"I'm not veiled anymore..." I murmured.

"Veiled or not, I think you're still beautiful..."

I let my teeth sank into my lower lips and shifted on my seat. Zeus rose a brow but didn't say anything. Napatalon nalang ako sa gulat nang biglang tumunog ang cellphone ko mula sa kwarto. The sound is barely audible, but we both could hear it... especially the song...

She's clad in a wedding dress with gold trims

She looks so beautiful walking down the aisle

But damn baby, my baby is not walking for me

I wish I could bring back time

Steal her from you

Make her mine again

Kinalimutan ko na ang takot ko sa dilim at mabilis na inakyat ang kwarto. I tripped over the stairs several times but still continued. Nang marating ko ang kwarto ay mabilis kong binuksan ang pinto at kinapa ang cellphone sa dilim. I quickly turned it off and pressed my eyes close, sulking in deep embarrassment.

Then I heard Zeus chuckled. When I snapped my head to the source of the rich, dark voice, I could see him standing in the doorway, a candle in hand, looking so elusive and mysterious. His eyes shone brighter in the dark, and the lazy grin tugged on his lips.

"I didn't realize you were listening to our songs to the point that you made it your ringtone..."

Ngumuso ako, namumula ang mukha. Humilig siya sa amba ng pintuan at patuloy akong pinagmasdan.

"You like that song particularly, Naia?"

I opened my mouth to speak but closed it again, knowing that I couldn't argue with him anymore. With my sagging shoulders, I nodded weakly.

"Fine, fine. I listen to your songs. Sino ba namang hindi?"

Tumitig ulit siya sa akin. Before he could retort, as I could see the battle in his eyes, I immediately cleared my throat and gestured outside.

"Labas na tayo. Mainit dito."

"Right..." he nodded, but still made no move. I pulled myself up from the bed and headed towards the door. Nilagpasan ko si Zeus. I only made a step away from him before I felt the bite of his hand on my arms. Napahinto ako pero hindi siya nilingon.

"You do know that I wrote the song for you, right?"

I nibbled my lower lips and lowered my gaze. Mas lalo pang hinigpitan ni Zeus ang hawak sa aking braso.

"When you got married..."

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata nang mariin at mapait na tumango. A sad smile broke on my lips.

"Alam mo, nagsisisi talaga ako na inimbita kita sa kasal na iyon." Ani ko sa mahinang tinig.

"Part of me is glad that I saw how beautiful you looked that day... and part of me is dying knowing that you're walking for someone else, Naia."

"Zeus..." hinarap ko siya, nag-iinit ang sulok ng mga mata. "Huwag na nating pag-usapan ang nangyari noon, ayos lang ba? I've moved on from it."

"Eh sa akin?"

He pulled me gently to his, leaning closer. I sucked in a deep breath as his eyes penetrated through my soul, digging for answers. Kahit anong gawa kong iwas ng tingin ay nahuhuli niya ang mga mata ko.

"How about me, Naia?"

I opened my mouth to speak when another loud roar of thunder broke the silence between the two of us. Pakiramdam ko ay lilipad na talaga ang bubong ko sa sobrang lakas ng hangin at ulan. I yelped a bit and pulled my hand away. Zeus remained calm, though, watching me with his dark eyes.

"B-Bumaba na tayo..."

He nodded and led the way. Hawak-hawak ko ang cellphone sa dibdib at bahagyang hiningal. I bit my lower lips and went straight to the sofa. This time, when Zeus placed back the scented candles on the table, he sat next to me.

"Kumusta na nga pala si Levi?"

Zeus turned to me, a questioning look settling on his face. "Hindi nasabi sa iyo ni Zoey?"

"Na ano?"

"Wala na si Levi..."

My heart skipped a beat. I stared at him as horror dawned on me and cold fear closed in my throat.

"A-Anong wala na si Levi?"

Zeus shrugged. "Wala na siya dito sa Pilipinas, matagal na... he went abroad to pursue medicine. Why?"

Nakahinga ako nang maluwag. "Zeus naman eh!"

"Ano?"

"You made it sound like he's... he's..." I trailed off and shook my head. I couldn't even say it!

He chuckled. "Masamang damo yun. Huwag kang masyadong mag-alala sa kaniya. He'll be home by the end of the year. If you want to meet with him, just tell me and I'll drag that kid back here."

Nginitian ko si Zeus. The way he's talking about his brother right now planted a fat reassurance that Levicitus is really okay.

"You should sleep. Gabi na." ani Zeus.

Ngumuso ako. Para na nga akong makukuryente na nagkakadikit ang mga tuhod naming dalawa. Sleep is not an option right now. Not when he's here to jolt my body alive.

"Eh ikaw?" I swallowed back a yawn and sat straighter. "Anong gagawin mo?"

"Babantayan kita."

Sinilip ko siya ng tingin ngunit nakatitig lamang siya sa kandila. I followed his gaze and watched the tiny flicker of flame accompanied with the sweet honeysuckle smell of the scented candle. It made the place more romantic, if not for the roars of the thunder every now and then and the heavy pour of the rain.

"Seriously, go to sleep." Aniya sa akin at umusog palayo upang bigyan ako ng espasyo. "You can place your head on my lap if you want..." tinapik-tapik pa niya ang matigas na hita at nginisihan ako.

Irap ang inabot sa akin ni Zeus. "Ayoko nga." I reached for the throw pillow and used it instead. Itinuro ko ang isa pang malaking sofa na walang nakaupo. "Pwede kang matulog dun."

"I'll stay here."

"You'll be uncomfortable. Sigurado ka?"

"Oo."

Tinitigan ko si Zeus pero hindi talaga siya gumalaw. In the end, I sighed and nodded. "I'll sleep then."

"Yeah."

"Matulog ka na din."

Hindi siya sumagot pero narinig ko siyang gumalaw. I hugged the throw pillow and closed my eyes. I thought I would have a hard time falling asleep with him by my side, but in just a matter of a few minutes, extreme fatigue pushed me into a deep slumber. The honeysuckle smell and his scent hung heavily on the air that eventually lulled me into darkness until I couldn't think anything but him and his smell.

"Naia..."

I grunted and moved. I could feel someone shaking my shoulders gently. When I opened my eyes, Zeus' face came into view. Sobrang lapit ng mukha niya sa akin. I could even smell his minty breath and had a close-up look of his flawless skin. For a moment, I was stunned before I got terrified. One wrong move and I'll embarrass myself to death. Maski paggalaw ng mga labi ko ay natatakot ako.

He stared at me even more darkly, before his eyes dropped to my chapped lips. My heart pounded wildly in my chest. I could feel him leaning closer and brushing his lips lightly against mine, before a harsh hiss came through his teeth and he pulled away, cursing himself.

"Umaga na." aniya nang hindi ako tinitingnan.

"U-Uhm... oo nga..." nauutal ko namang sagot. I cleared my throat and quickly got up. I could feel the dull ache at the back of my neck and my spine. Napansin ko ding nakapatong na ang dalawa kong mga paa sa sofa at wala na din ang kandila sa lamesa. He must've got up early.

"I need to go. Ayoko lang magising kang nag-iisa."

I nodded in understanding. He shoved his hands into his pockets and then tilted his head a bit na para bang naghihintay ng kung ano. Nang wala siyang marinig mula sa akin, bumuga siya ng isang malalim na hininga.

"Wala kang sasabihin sa akin?"

"Uh... mag-iingat ka?"

"Yun lang?"

I scratched my brows. "Ano pa ba dapat?"

He stared at me as if he couldn't believe what he was hearing. Zeus shook his head and murmured something under his breath.

"Anong sinabi mo?"

"Wala." He cleared his throat and then took a step away. Tumama ang liwanag na tumatagos mula sa bintana ko sa kaniyang mata na nagpakinang dito. "I'll have something to say to you, though."

"What is it?"

"I want to take it slow... for you. But I don't want to risk losing you again. I still have the fear that if I leave you, I will never find you again."

"Zeus—"

"Sumama ka sa akin sa Davao."

"Huh?"

"I'm going back to Governor Generoso for a while. Bibisitahin ko sina Mommy."

Mabilis kong kinalkula ang mga araw na natitira sa bakasyon ko bago ko kailangang bumalik sa Zamboanga.

"Kailan ka ba aalis?"

"We're still arranging the schedule but I just want to know if you'll come with me."

"Walang magagalit?" itinagilid ko ang ulo ko at tinitigan siya.

"Ako ang magagalit kapag hindi ka sumama."

I chuckled, then nodded. "Fine. Sasama ako sa iyo."

"Good." He reached for my hair and stared at it, playing with the ends, before he let go and sighed. "I want to see you tonight, too. Can you come to my house tonight?"

I nodded again.

"I'll have Nigel pick you up later..."

"Okay." I chirped.

"And Naia...?"

"Hm?"

"For the love of God..." he raked a hand through his hair. "Please wait for me this time. The last time I told you to wait for me, you disappeared for ten years."

Pagak akong tumawa. "Huwag kang mag-alala Zeus, hindi na ulit ako mawawala..."

"I hope you keep your promise."

I nibbled my lower lips, ashamed at myself, and then nodded. "I promise..."