Chapter 23

I could still taste death in my mouth when I open my eyes. My surroundings started to spin and as I lay hopeless on the bed, I wondered if I could ever get rid of the fear of the townspeople that is now housing my chest and penetrating my heart.

"Ate Naia..."

Groggily, I sat up on bed. The room smelled of lavender and honey. The familiar tune of the beach waves told me that I am not in a hospital, the way I expected it to. I am inside a room, and on a couch pushed against the alabaster-white wall, is Zeus sleeping with only a wool blanket on. He looks tired. His hair is messy and dark circles are starting to form under his eyes. His firm, unsmiling mouth is set into a thin line.

"Ate Naia..." pag-uulit ni Levi. He stared down at me, sitting on the rattan chair next to my bed. "Gising ka na ba?"

My hands automatically went to my hair and to my horror, I couldn't feel my hijab or any scarf on. I buried my fingers on my hair and felt a thick bandage surrounding my temples.

"Where's my hijab, Levi?"

"Napunit po nung dinumog kayo ng mga tao sa bahay ninyo..."

I felt like crying. Hindi ako makatingin sa kaniya at hindi rin ako mapakali.

"Naia?" Zeus jolted awake and immediately rose to his feet. Halos takbuhin niya na ang pagitan mula sa couch na hinihigaan at sa kama ko, gayong hindi naman ito gaanong kalayo. His face is etched with worry and concern.

"Are you okay? Still hurting?"

Hindi rin ako makatingin sa kaniya. I lowered my head in shame.

"Naia?" untag sa akin ni Zeus. He touched my arm and the slightest skin contact made me jump a bit. Zeus cursed when he realized the root cause of my misery.

"I'll get my scarf from my room," he said, then quickly disappeared.

I clutched my chest and brought my trembling hands to my lap, staring silently at the bruises and the cuts. I then suddenly remembered Mama Normillah. I turned sharply to Levi.

"W-Where's my mother?"

"She's resting next room. Dalawang beses ka na niyang binisita simula nang magising siya." Ani Levi. "Pasensiya na, ate, at hindi namin nakuha ang hijab mo. Alalang-alala kami sa iyo dahil dumudugo ang ulo mo kaya nakaligtaan na namin iyon."

I shook my head weakly. "I see no need for an apology, Levi."

Zeus appeared on the door a few seconds later, a checkered scarf on his hand. "I really couldn't see any other scarf..." he said, handing it to me. "Sorry. I'll buy you a proper hijab later."

"Salamat, Zeus." I smiled tightly at him, relieved that I could finally veil myself. I wrapped the scarf around my head and tucked the ends together. Feeling satisfied, I could finally gaze at the Ferrer brothers. "Tulog pa ba ang Mama-jan ko? Kumusta siya?"

"She's okay, Naia. You got it worse than her." Zeus said in a controlled anger, clenching and unclenching his fists. "My Dad had already charged the townspeople who ransacked your home and attacked the two of you."

I nodded silently. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na nangyari iyon sa amin, gayong wala naman kaming ginagawang masama. We were just trying to live a peaceful life until the incident happened. And now, none of the townspeople could look at us without a hint of hatred, of disgust, and worse, of fear. They stare at us, alarmed that one of us will try and kill them again. They see nothing but a bunch of murderers in us.

I stared blankly at the window in front of me. There are lovely shells arranged neatly by the sill and the curtains are made of beads that it sings every time it dances with the wind. Nilingon ko si Zeus.

"Si Malik?"

"Still looking for that bastard?"

"Kuya!" sinapak ni Levi si Zeus at siya na ang sumagot para sa akin. "Ilang oras pagkatapos ka naming dinala dito ay dumating si Malik, Ate Naia. Nag-aalala din siya sa iyo."

"If he's so worried about you, he shouldn't leave his wife alone in the house during a crisis. He should be there, fighting for you." Zeus pointed out.

Tipid na ngiti ang isinagot ko sa kaniya. "Ayos lang, Zeus."

Pumintig sa sakit ang ulo ko. I don't know what's going to happen to the two of us after this. Makakabalik pa kaya kami sa dati naming bahay? Makakapag-aral pa ba ako?

I was about to get up but Zeus was quick to put his hands on my shoulders. Tinulak niya ako pabalik sa kama.

"I'm just going to check on Mama-jan..." it came out as a whimper.

"No." he said sternly. "You're going to rest. The wound in your head is still fresh, Naia. Don't be stubborn."

"I'm going to be fine."

"You're not getting out of this bed until I tell you to do so," he said, pulling out a tray with a glass of water and some white pills on a small ceramic plate. "For the meantime, you should take the pain killers that the doctor left for you."

"Is it really necessary?" I muttered. Gusto ko nang makita ang Mama-jan ko at makausap siya.

"Your mother is still resting. Please take the pill. Naia, you won't heal faster with a stubborn attitude."

"Fine." I took the pills, popped it inside of my mouth, and washed it off with water. Levi drew the curtains to let the air from the beach enter the room.

"I'll bring your lunch in a minute." Zeus said, wiping the corners of my mouth with a white towel and then gathering the empty glass into the tray. He sent me a warning look when I tried to move before heading out of the room.

When the door closed, Levi turned to me and gave me a rueful smile. "He's just worried about you, Ate Naia."

"I know. But I really want to see my mother... see if she's doing okay."

"She's okay. If anything, you were badly hurt. Kaya halos mabaliw ang kuya ko nang tahiin ang sugat mo sa ulo. Hayaan mo nalang muna siya."

I smiled at him. "Thanks, Levi."

The pain killers that he gave me started dragging me to sleep. Annoyed at myself for being so weak, I drifted into darkness again. Several times I woke, but went back to sleep as I can't keep my eyes open for a few minutes.

Nang magising ako sa pangatlong pagkakataon, madilim na sa labas. I grunted a bit, my head spinning. The house is quiet but I could hear the occasional murmur of voices outside the door. Doon napunta ang direksyon ng tingin ko kaya naman nang bigla itong bumukas at iniluwa si Zeus ay nakita ko kaagad siya.

"Are you awake now?" he asked, switching on the lights.

I stared at him, and quickly averted my gaze. He is topless, with water dripping from his hair. The jeans hung low on his waist, revealing a black band of the boxers he is wearing. I trembled at the sight. Pinapatuyo niya ng tuwalya ang kaniyang buhok.

"K-Kindly put on something please..." I murmured.

"Right. Sorry." He said in a low voice, before disappearing for a bit and appearing again in a gray cotton shirt after a few seconds. "Gutom ka na ba?"

I bit my lower lips. I'm really hungry. I don't think I've eaten something for the past 24 hours. "Medyo..." mahina kong wika.

"I'll fix you some food."

"Can I see my mother now?"

"And call your mother here, too. She's awake now."

I nodded gratefully at Zeus. He shut the door gently and I was left alone in the cold room again. Willing to move my limbs, I carefully lifted the thick blanket off my frail body. My gaze landed at the silky fabric resting on the night table next to my bed. Kinuha ko iyon at pinagmasdan. Saka gumuhit ang ngiti sa mga labi ko.

He really bought me a new hijab.

Unwrapping my head from the scarf I wore, I carefully put on my new hijab. The rose-gold veil feels so light in my head and soft on my skin. Itinupi ko ang hiniram na scarf mula kay Zeus at kahit na bahagyang nanginginig ang mga tuhod ay nagtungo ako sa bintana. I inhaled the cool air from the beach, feeling a bit better though my head is still pounding.

After a few minutes of solitude and just by staring at the beach, a knock sounded on my door. Mama-jan entered with a smile, carrying a tray of foods and placing it on my bed. I was expecting Zeus to follow him, but Mama-jan is alone. Siguro ay naisip niyang bigyan kaming dalawa ng privacy.

"Mama-jan..." I hugged her tight when she opened her arms for me, then I felt her kissing my forehead.

"My precious daughter..." she whispered. "I was so worried about you."

"Ayos na po ako."

"Yes, Parvana. Allah has heard my prayers and brought you back to me."

I hugged her tighter and buried my face on her chest, inhaling the familiar apple blossom scent of my mother.

"Ano pong mangyayari sa ating dalawa, Mama-jan?" mahina kong tanong sa kaniya. She tensed a bit. "Hindi na po ba tayo makakabalik sa dati nating bahay?"

"I'm afraid we can't, Parvana. Once your Baba gets out of the jail, we will immediately leave this town."

Nanigas ako sa narinig. Talaga bang aalis kami dito? Iiwan ko si Zeus at Levi at Zoey? Ang mga Ferrer? I bit my lower lips. However bad we were treated by the townspeople here because we're Muslims, I've found my true friends here in this village. My heart aches at the thought that we have to leave them.

"Malik is doing the best he can to get your father out. I heard Datu Kiram is not happy with the news of him being imprisoned."

"Pero wala po siyang ginawang masama!"

"I know, Parvana. Azir may be a bit harsh, but he can't kill a child. No man who have strong faith of Allah can take the life of anyone... especially a precious, little child."

Nangilid ang mga luha ko sa mata. Naalala ko ulit kung gaano kagalit ang ina ni Thea sa amin, at kung papaano kami tinrato na parang mga hayop ng mga tao dito. Sa sobrang galit nila sa amin ay nagawa na nila kaming saktan.

"Mama-jan... ayoko pong umalis dito,"

"We'll stay here for a little bit. I am trying to contact my relatives and begging them to help us. Kahit ikaw nalang ang kunin nila dito. I can't have you risking your life for me again, Parvana. Mababaliw ako kapag may nangyaring masama sa iyo, naiintindihan mo ba iyon?"

Tears brimmed at the corner of my eyes.

"Mama-jan..."

"I'd rather die protecting you, Parvana. I can't afford to lose you, after almost losing Azir. Hindi ko kakayanin ang sakit, anak..."

I could feel the pain from her words, her tone, the trembling of her fingers as she desperately hugged me. Niyakap ko din siya pabalik. Alam kong hindi na kami pwedeng manatili dito, pero alam kong pwede pa akong makabalik dito. Kapag maayos na ang lahat. Siguro kapag nakalaya na si Baba at naintindihan na ng lubos ng mga tao na wala talaga siyang kinalaman sa pagkamatay ni Thea. I will pray that they will understand our innocence and their hearts be softer this time. And when I go back here, I know Zeus and Levi and Zoey will be waiting. Panatag na ako doon.

After eating dinner with my mother, the Ferrer couple visited me on my room to check on me. Halos lumuhod na ako sa harapan nila kakapasalamat. We don't deserve to be the receiving end of their generosity, but they helped us without hesitation. And for that, I am forever grateful.

The pain killers took its toll on my body again. Ilang oras lang akong gising ay inaantok na naman ako. In the end, I went back to bed and slept with a better heart.

Nang magising ako ay hindi pa sumisikat ang araw. I could see the first soft rays of the sun, burning in yellow, orange, and red streaks when I opened my eyes. Bumangon ako mula sa kama at sumilip sa bintana. Pinagmasdan ko ang dagat sa hindi kalayuan. The waves are sparkling and a bit calm this morning. The long stretch of sand is inviting for a morning walk and the soothing cool breeze whispers on my ears.

I struggled a bit walking towards the window. Leaning against the sill, I watched in silence as the sun gracefully rose from the horizon before the Ferrer brothers came into view. Both Zeus and Levi are panting, jogging on the sand abreast each other, wearing matching grey sweatpants and white cotton shirts. Their wavy locks are whipping on the morning air as they continued to jog. A few moments later, their father came into view. The brothers halted as their father spoke, pointing onwards, and then they both nodded before they continued jogging.

Nang mawala na sila sa paningin ko ay saka ko pa ibinaling ang tingin nang marinig ang pagbukas ng pintuan. Tita Belle came into view, smiling kindly at me.

"Kumusta na ang lagay mo, Parvana?"

I smiled at her. "Ayos na po. Salamat po talaga sa tulong niyo sa amin..."

"Don't mention it." She waved a manicured hand at me and opened the door wider. A middle-aged woman in her white lab coat stepped inside the room. "This is Dr. Civardi, the one who tended to your wounds the other day. She's here to clean your wounds again and change the bandage."

"Feeling alright, Parvana?" the doctor asked kindly of me.

"Opo. Salamat din po sa tulong niyo..."

"I'm surprised you can stand by your own now. I guess you're not as weak as I thought. But you still need to rest. I advise a week's rest before you start doing your routines again."

"I understand, doctor."

She gestured towards the edge of the bed. "Please take a sit."

Pumasok din si Mama-jan sa kwarto pagkatapos ng ilang segundo. She and Tita Belle are talking about something while the doctor took off my hijab and cleaned my wounds. I tried to stay still, even though it stings a bit. She wrapped my wound with a new bandage and tapped it lightly.

"Huwag kang gaanong maglilikot. The more you rest, the faster you will heal. And take the pain killers I've prescribed for you. You may feel a little sleepy, but it helps you to numb the pain."

"Salamat po ulit, doc."

She nodded and gathered her things. Tita Belle said she's going to have my breakfast delivered to my room. Umalis na silang tatlo nila Mama-jan sa kwarto ko.

I went back to the four-poster bed and lay. I want to at least go out and feel the sun on my skin. Kung mananatili lang ako dito ay wala din naman akong gagawin. Hindi ako sanay na walang ginagawa at pinagsisilbihan ng mga tao.

Maybe I should ask Zeus?

"No. You can't go out."

Napanguso ko. I was already expecting him to say no, but when it came clear and fast from his mouth, all hopes of enjoying the beach for a bit while I am recovering vanished into thin air.

"You're still stick and you need to rest," Zeus said, placing a tall glass of Mango smoothie on the night table. I haven't seen him since earlier, when I caught glimpse of him jogging with his brother and father on the beach.

"Aren't you supposed to be in the university right now?" mahina kong tanong sa kaniya habang inaabot ang baso.

Zeus wiped a sweat at his brow. He's panting a bit. I guess he didn't have much time to rest after his morning routine.

"You're supposed to be in school right now, too. But you're confined in the bed with a wound in your head. What makes you think I can go back to Davao without worrying about you, Naia?" seryoso niyang tanong sa akin.

I bit my lower lips and averted my gaze away. "Zeus..."

"I think I'm going to skip the first semester. I'll stay here until things are settled down."

"You can't just leave your life in the city trying to watch over me, Zeus." Nagi-guilty kong wika sa kaniya.

"Yeah. Why the hell not?"

Hindi kaagad ako nakasagot. If he's really worried about me, it'll be harder for me to tell him that we're going to leave the town sooner or later. And now that he's pausing his life for me, it makes it harder for me to leave this guy behind.

"You really shouldn't worry about me, Zeus. I'm okay—"

"Okay?" he turned sharply at me. "Damn it, Naia. I left you for a day and when I came back, some motherfucker is pounding your head against the gate of your own house. And then you'll tell me you're okay?"

Napalunok ako. I could hear the controlled anger in his voice. He swore under his breath and dragged a hand through his hair.

"You can't blame me for this, okay? You can't blame me for worrying to death about you. I don't want people taking advantage of you because you're too kind for your own sake. I don't want you to get hurt again. I can watch you get married to another man over and over again but I can't... for the love of God, watch you bleeding and fighting for your life again. I can't stand it...do you understand me?"

Nanginig ang mga labi ko at dahan-dahang tumango. My heart wouldn't stop pounding wildly inside of my chest and my pulse leapt at the intensity of his words. A muscle on his jaw twitched in anger.

"Good. Come here..."

"What..."

"Just come here."

Nag-aalangan akong lumapit sa kaniya. Zeus grabbed my arm and yanked me closer to him, engulfing me into a hug.

"Zeus, you can't just touch me—"

"The hell I care with the rules, Naia..." he whispered and bury his face on my hijab. Mas hinigpitan niya ang yakap sa akin. "I don't care anymore... don't scare me again, okay?"

I bit my lower lips and nodded slowly, then found myself hugging him back.