Warning drug stuff

You know those days where you wake up and nothing's okay?

It's been like that for about 2 years now.

21st of January. I'm 20 years old today. What a day.

I hear my mom downstairs, cooking me breakfast. She's gonna try so hard to make this perfect. My nineteenth was a disaster.

I really don't like birthdays.

I sit up slowly. I just want to get to the lab and spend my day with Professor Oak. It's the only place where I really feel useful.

I hear muttering at the bottom of the stairs. Mom talking to dad.

And then, they come up the stairs. The door opens. They barge in, mom with a tray in her hands.

"Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear Eden! Happy birthday to you!"

I plaster a smile onto my face and take the tray. Eggs and bacon. Arranged to look like a smiley face.

"Here's your card, sweetheart." My mom hands me a birthday card. "Eat your breakfast and then come downstairs for some presents."

I nod. They leave me alone.

Have I swept myself more and more into a dark, inhabitable hole where all I want is to curl up and die since Daniel ended it? Maybe I have. So what?

I eat the food but it tastes bland and tasteless. I know it's good, home cooked food, but these days I rarely eat, and when I do, it's usually when I'm with the boys and they buy me dinner.

Screw the lab. Maybe they'll make today good.

I finish eating. I don't need presents. They don't make me happy, and it's awkward smiling like a lunatic and thanking people endlessly for their kindness. I get dressed.

After opening the presents- jewellery, makeup, chocolate, whatever else you'd expect to receive- I head to the lab. Writing reports has never been so good.

Professor Oak gave me a card before I left that evening. I headed downtown to meet up with those boys.

They say they're in Team Rocket. I'm not sure what that is. It sounds dangerous, though, and I'm gonna get involved; no matter how much I feel it's a bad idea.

They're total scumbags. But I've lost all my dignity at this point. My skirts have gotten shorter and shorter and my necklines lower and lower. I want them to look at me and smack me on the ass and make comments. I don't like it but it reminds me that I'm real.

As soon as I join them I'm met with wolf whistles, and a handful of happy birthdays. I'm given vodka immediately, and I take a few swigs straight from the bottle. Fuck-my-life, I think with each swallow. My throat burns and my head fogs. Good enough.

"Eden, are you a pussy?" One of them asks. The one who's always making comments. The one who's seen me naked more times than I'd like to admit. The one who threatened to beat me if I didn't abort.

"No."

"Snort some of this, baby girl." He says. He throws an arm around my waist, and then his hand moves down, gripping my thigh. I'd have been uncomfortable once but now I don't have the will or energy to care.

"What is it?"

"It's the best stuff. You'll see stuff for weeks." He smirks. "Go 0n, babe. Do it for me." He says, going to suck on my neck. I want him off me so I just nod.

"Wait! Follow us first."

I let them lead me into the centre of the woods. It's dark. Anything could be out there now.

I'm starting to feel regret, but I know even if I ran off, I'd not know my way out. It's probably better to just do what they say. They might lead me out again if I'm lucky.

I sharply inhale the white powder. My nose stings and burns, my eyes water.

"Oh, come on, don't be a baby. You can do more than that."

I nod. I continue until my head's pulled back. "For fuck's sake, are you trying to kill yourself?! Stupid bitch."

I can't respond. I feel nauseous, anxious, my heart is pounding, my head is reeling.

"Shit, I'm not dealing with this." He walks away. The others follow suit.

I'm lost in the woods.

I can't see. What little light I can see is wavering and spinning. I feel like my head is going to explode.

Please, I think to whatever god might be out there, if I'm going to die tonight don't make it painful.

I can't stand up again. I crawl around for hours on end. I don't know where I'm going. I just want to go home now; to my own bed, to sleep. I vomit down myself a few times. It doesn't make me feel much better.

My phone. I can call for help. My parents will be so mad but I can't bring myself to care. I go to my pocket- but it's not there. It must have fallen out somewhere. There's no chance of me finding it now.

I just continue forwards. If I go in one direction, I must come to the woods edge eventually, right? Then, it'll be some kind of town where some bar will be open and I can borrow someone's phone.

I continue. I reach light.

Pallet Town. Even better.

I have no strength at all left. My skin is hot to the touch, I shake uncontrollably,I hear my heart pounding in my ears. I find Oak's house, and I knock as hard as my feeble hands will.

There's some movement inside, and the door swings open. There he is- and I promptly stumble against the door frame. Professor Oak grabs both of my arms and pulls me indoors.

"What the hell happened to you?! Out in the middle of January?! Without a coat?!"

I can't speak. I feel hot, but he's right. It's the heart of winter.

He helps me onto his couch, going to find a blanket.

It hits me just how sick I am then. I lie down. I never want to get up again. My head is absolutely pounding, my stomach churns. I worry that I'll throw up all over his nice house, but I'm that ill that I can't worry about it.

It takes me a few seconds to realise he's calling for an ambulance.

"I suspect a drug overdose." He says.

Overdose. Feels like a punch to the gut after Daniel.

Blacking out, the world seems to fade around me.