I'm admitted to hospital

Early morning in September

Giving up slowly

All the colours are confusion

All I remember is blacking out

In the bathroom

Someone's desperate knocks fading out

As all I see is a black hole of 

Nothingness 

Anorexia tells me I haven't tried hard enough

That I've failed myself

Fat, ugly fatso

My body can't keep going this way

Can it?

I wake up

And around me is a 

Sterile blur

Of nurses, doctors and needles

Mom is asleep on the chair

Tousled hair over her face

Her face drawn and pale 

Nearly lifeless

I look at my arm

At the pipes and tubes

Leading in and 

Out of my body

Carrying fluids 

I'm silent

But a cheery nurse comes over

And mom wakes up 

How long do I have to stay here

Staying healthy

Staying monitored?