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I threw away the flower vase angrily before storming away from her sight. After leaving from there, I went into the balcony of my room and took deep breaths to calm myself down.

I wanted to shout my lungs out to release all my pent-up frustrations. Why couldn't she understand my efforts? Why couldn't she look past my words? Why was she doing all this to me? Why? Why? Why?

Thinking of all the recent happenings and her behavior, I dejectedly slumped down on the swing. Rubbing my face in exhaustion, I shifted my gaze up to the cloudless sky where the orange hues were vanishing and the brightness was disappearing, slowly getting replaced with the darkness of the night.

"Wasn't it how my life is?"

I smiled sardonically at the thought of it.

To be honest, I have imagined countless scenarios of us being together and weaved so many dreams in my head about us. I knew it was not possible between us from the beginning. I knew we were not meant to be together. I knew she would never place me in her heart.

Yet I was content as long as I could get a glimpse of her. I was happy just to see her from afar. My bickerings with her were the only pretense I could use to have an interaction with that head-strong lady. I didn't know when she became the rhythm of my heartbeat. I didn't know when she became such an important part of my life. She became an exception even when she went against my own dogmas.

I have to hate her for inflicting so much pain onto my heart yet here it is, still yearning for her, wanting to protect her from all the demons she was fighting over.

Even when I wanted to turn a blind eye, I couldn't, when I was aware of all her internal struggles, when I knew she wanted to trust me with her secrets but couldn't dare to do so. When I knew she wanted me to see her real self and something was stopping her from reaching out to me.

I knew it all, that's why I wanted to be a support for her. I wanted to be her strength but this was all my wishful thinking. She never actually needed me in her life. She never thought of me as a person to trust her life with me. She never chose me over someone.

This morning when I saw Ikshith at my doorstep, only I knew how panicked I was, internally. I was afraid that she would choose him over me again and she proved me right by going with him.

I guess I should stop when it was time to, otherwise the only one who was going to get hurt would be always me. I should shut my heart forever, so I didn't have to go through the same pain again

On another note, again amidst all this, it didn't go unnoticed by me how she looked so terrified when she saw him at our doorstep. The look on her face told me that she would have banged the door on his face to avoid a disaster if I wasn't there and I had a gut feeling that she went out with him to avoid him in spilling some darkest secrets.

But weren't they in love with each other? How could I forget the day when she crushed my hopes like nothing and declared her undying love for him?

When these thoughts struck me, I couldn't help but recall that dreadful memories.

I recalled how nervous I was when I decided to confess to her after receiving my IPS training notification. I felt like I should let her know my feelings before it was too late. So I wrote all my feelings in a letter and on my way to my daksha's home, I even bought her favorite tulips.

I was grinning like an idiot when I reached their doorstep but suddenly I became a little timid when I thought of all the what-ifs. So instead of directly handing out a letter to her, I decided to put it in front of the door itself.

With that thought, I continuously rang the doorbell until I heard the footsteps. I kept the letter and flowers in front of the door and rushed towards a tree to hide behind it, praying that she would be the one to open the door.

As if my prayers were answered, she was the one who had indeed opened the door. When she saw her favorite flowers lying on the doorstep, I could see the curiosity fleeting over her eyes. I was taking in all her expressions when she was reading the letter while my heart was thudding in anticipation of her reaction.

Suddenly I saw a guy rushing from inside and placing a hand over her shoulder. When he saw the flowers and letter in her hand, he looked around with a cold look.

'My my my... Isn't this a confession from some pretty boy?' he asked her with a smirk for which she fisted her hand over a letter, crumbling the edges of it a little while biting her lips.

'Who is that guy? Do you also like him?' he asked her in a probing way while looking in my direction as if he had noticed my presence long back. So instead of ducking away, I stood straight and matched his gaze with the same intensity.

With an winning smile, he leaned over and whispered something in her ear which made her stiffen a little and she became quiet for a moment before lifting her face.

With a bright smile, she replied,' It doesn't matter whoever it is when my heart only longs for you. I love you, Ikshith, only you. So, don't worry, I won't fall for these silly confessions.'

Saying this, she ruthlessly dumped those flowers and threw away the letter without any respect for the opposite person's feelings. Once she was done, he hugged her so proudly while throwing me a mocking look which I couldn't care less at that moment because I had already expected a rejection as a worst possibility but what I didn't expect was, this kind of disrespect from her.

At that moment, I felt like I did a good thing by not confessing her directly otherwise it would have hurt my self-respect as well. At that moment I hardened my heart to not fall for her or anyone for that matter and decided to focus on my goal.

That day when I left from there, I never turned back, I entirely kept my focus on my training, consoling myself that love was not the only great thing to achieve in life and when you look past it, there were many things beyond that.

Even when I got the posting in my own city, never once did I ever try to meet her on my own accord but again when I was doing one thing, my heart decided to do the other. I thought she was a closed chapter but it proved me wrong when I again started seeing her around Aarna or meeting her in some family functions. I realized that I could never get over her when her presence itself was deeply etched in my heart.

So I decided that instead of avoiding her, let's at least make some memories to cherish later, so that was the start of our bickerings with me passing snarky remarks at her to spite her and god, she would never bore me out and would always outdo me.

I really enjoyed those moments with her but that was it, I never dared to imagine beyond that as I knew I was the only one who would be bound to get hurt when started thinking about these unthinkable and to be honest, I never knew whether she was aware of a fact that I was the one who wrote that letter to her or for a matter of fact, I once had feelings for her. Alas, even if she did, it didn't seem to cause much difference to our equation and given a chance, I would pray that she would never know it.

When I heard about her wedding, needless to say, I felt disappointed & hurt which I shouldn't feel in the first place because I had already expected it to happen But with a twist of fate, we were tied together in this hopeless relationship where I was trying to give us a chance by putting some effort in at least getting to know her side of the story and where she was pushing me away like always. Rejection, first time itself to experience it, it was so painful and it took me years to recover from it and now facing this rejection at my every attempt of getting to know her, I was clearly exhausted and hurt.

Just as I composed myself, my mobile chimed with an incoming message. So, bringing myself out of my thoughts, I opened the message from my dad to read its content.

'be home in an hour along with her. Need to discuss something.'

-Dad

Though he didn't mention the name, it didn't need the genius to guess that he was referring to Yuktha but that was not the main concern. Why did he want us to be there so urgently? Did something happen? I thought to call and ask him the same but on second thought, if it was something that could be discussed over a phone call, he wouldn't have asked me to come home in the first place. So I decided it was wise to go home and see what he had to say but for that, I again had to face her.

All the emotions that had been suppressed till now were resurfacing again. Hurt and anguish were dancing in my heart. Taking a deep breath, I masked my emotions to put on my pretense and left my room with a blank face.

Taking steady steps towards her room, I knocked on the door slightly and stood with my back facing it. When I heard the creaking sound, I just turned my head slightly and without even taking a glance at her, I informed her to be ready in 5 as we had to leave for my parents ' home and told her that I would be waiting in the parking lot.

The journey to my parent's home was filled with complete silence as both of us were immersed in our own thoughts. As we reached their place, she got off the car and when I came back after parking the car, I could see her standing still at the entrance as if she was contemplating whether to enter or not. As I neared her, I got to know that reason for her contemplation as I could hear some sort of argument.

Brushing past her, I stepped forward only to see my dad, flaring up in anger and my mom, trying to pacify him regarding something.

"All good??", I asked them, while taking the casual steps inside while glancing at my back a little, to see her tailing behind me with the cautious steps.

"Good? Do you really think any good will happen after they entered our lives again?" my dad flared again while glancing mildly at yuktha and when she heard this, she lifted her head to look at my dad and again turned her head aside with a helpless look.

When I saw this, I shielded her a little and turned towards him with a frown while saying, " Can we please come to the point? Why have you assembled us here?"

" What else for? Your mom's dearest nephew is getting married and she is insisting that we all should be there as a family. Like in hell, I would give in and give them a face. By the way, she was the one who summoned you here,' saying this, he turned towards my mom and pointed towards her, 'So.. You..deal with it. I am not going to step foot again in their home."

Hearing this, my mom looked at me helplessly and said, 'Indra, I really can't vouch the right or wrongs of the past happenings but one thing, I can say for sure is, my dad would have never done such thing.'

Listening to this, my dad again shouted at her, ' then do you mean we have lied about everything? Sudha, you won't believe me but you will believe your son..right? He had witnessed everything at such a tender age. He saw it all. You know, how humiliating it was to experience everything in front of your own son? It's such a black spot in my life and you are poking my wounds by doing this.'

Saying this, he slumped into the sofa tiredly as I immediately lunged forward to take a seat beside him to rub his back to calm him down as I gave my mom a helpless glance indicating to stop all this but instead of listening to me, she sat in front of my dad on her knees and held his hand while patting it lightly.

"Raj, I never said that I didn't believe you. We have spent nearly 30 years together. So, why do you think I didn't trust you? I trust you and I trust my dad as well. All I am saying is, there is some misunderstanding and I want your presence there to clear everything. I missed so many things and moments, I don't want to miss this as well. Please, come with me. I promise, this would be the last time and even I would never meet them again after this. Please, agree to it.'

she pleaded while trying to control her sobbing and I could see my dad pondering over whether to say yes or no as I knew that he could never stand my mom's tears but at the same time, agreeing to it meant he had to revisit his old wounds.

"Ma, why are you even troubling Dad over this? If you want, you can go. That's your place and no one is gonna stop you but forcing Dad like this, I really can't stand this. Respect his choice like he is respecting yours. We have been absent in their lives for more than 28 yrs and missing one more wouldn't make any difference. Also, it's better to have as less interaction as possible with those people. "

While saying my eyes had brushed past Yuktha and I could see her taking a step back instantly when she heard my words as I flinched a little at the remembrance of what I had blurted just now. I let out a sigh and returned my gaze to my mom who was sobbing uncontrollably.

"Yes, you are right, Indra. I shouldn't have forced him like this. In my life, they both are important and he is unnecessarily hating someone whom he shouldn't and hating someone is so taxing. So, that's why I thought to give him some closure to ease his pain but I guess, while trying to do it, I am inflicting more pain on him and yes, we have been absent for so many years and being absent for few more years wouldn't make much difference but Indra, you know what, I am getting old and my dad is also aging, so we can't afford those years but it's fine. I guess, we will be fine like how we are now. Forget that this conversation has even happened. It's too late. So stay here for tonight if you wish to."

Saying this she stood up slowly while brushing off her tears, she flashed yuktha a light smile as she made her way upstairs and I shook my head helplessly as they both were right on their part.

And yuktha who had been the silent spectator till now opened her mouth as if she was fed up with all these and started taking steady steps towards where we were sitting with a calm face. Upon reaching us, she met my dad's gaze and started saying while placing her hands on her waist with a hmph, " I know it's not my place to speak but I really can't stand you both talking down my grandpa. It's a fact that we have wronged you and I am so sorry that this has happened to you but you don't have any right to demean my old man."

"You have loved her a lot..right? So in all these years of your marriage, did she make any wrong judgment or did she do anything to bring shame on to you or your family?' When she asked this, we both gave her a sharp glance as she chuckled a little.

"It means she hasn't..right? And you know that she was practically brought up by that man? If you can't trust his upbringing, you should at least trust your wife whom you have loved inside and outside because of her character. You should believe her when she is claiming her father's innocence. Or is it so hard to do it because he belonged to that family? Then I would say it is too partial to judge someone on this basis.'

'Even I am not interested in going to my ex-fiancee's wedding but I am willing to go there because of you. So, give me a chance to prove my grandpa's innocence and give yourself a chance to come out of those shackles. This is not to reopen your wounds but to heal them once and forever. So, the choice is yours." after saying this piece, she turned towards me with a sigh as if she had to pacify another kid and gestured me with her finger to stand up.

Frowning a little, subconsciously I did what she asked me to and she slowly marched towards me and tiptoeing, she gripped my shirt before mumbling in my ears.

'You are so itching to know the answers..right? Then this is your only chance. Indra, don't blame me. You wished for it and you have dragged yourself into this whole mess. So, be ready. It's gonna be a messy ride with roads full of twists and turns where you will either hate me more or fall head over heels for me unknowingly.'

Saying this, she patted my cheek with a consoling smile and sashayed away her way after giving us both a final glance, leaving us on our own to decide as I kept on looking at her retreating with the clear gaze.

..........

Hello All,

I know it's been a long. How are you all?

Thanks for waiting so patiently while I was working on my writer's block and sorting out the things in my personal life.

Finally I have managed to complete the chapter which I had been drafting for more than an year😂. Please do enjoy it even if it's not up to the mark.

Thanks for being so understanding and thanks for reading.

Please, do vote and comment.