Chapter 27: I don't care anymore

Hannah:

I can handle this, I can handle this, chanting this to myself watching Madeline and Charlie all couply with each other. I can handle this. I took deep breath as I slowly walked to my next class, which is in the direction of where Madeline and Charlie are. I felt Louis holding my hand and I looked up to him and gave him a small smile. Passing by them, taking a peek at Charlie and we locked eyes for a second before I turned away. My attention is short to what the teacher was saying the first ten minutes in History class, but zoned back in when he said we should read chapter ten through twelve for the rest of the class. I read chapter ten but kinda spaced again pretending to read, reveling how Charlie could date her.

He's such a freaking idiot, but I still love him. No, he sucks because he ended what we had. I don't care anymore. I don't. When the bell rang, I started to put my things away then our teacher said tomorrow we will review what we read for a quiz on Wednesday. I'm so hungry, thank God it's lunch time, I think they're serving egg rolls or hamburgers or both I'm starving. The menu said hamburgers, I got mine putting ketchup and mustard on it sitting on our table. Linda and Edward sat in front of me while feeding each other, Louis at my side sitting real close and asking me if I wanted a brownie, I nodded and he handed me the one he bought.

"What's up, Charlie?" I heard from a distance, looking up to a guy that greeted Charlie with a fist bump and he left. Madeline was sitting by his side, practically on his lap as she showed off. I grimaced at sight, I could probably throw my leftovers at him but that's petty. Louis squeezed my hand for reassurance, "don't worry about them." I nodded, staring at my half eaten burger. I felt sick but I can't make it go to waste so I started eating it again.

***

English class, I began to dread since Charlie's there. I could skip but that would lead me wallowing in pity and too many questions that I don't want to answer.

Just it suck it up, I breathed out and opened the door the teacher writing on the board. I'm the second one here; the first is a blonde girl pulling out her book expressionless. Two minutes in, I read some chapters of 'Jane Eyre', the class started getting full. No sign of Charlie, hoping that he transferred back to his old class, but luck is not on my side spotting him in the doorway. Madeline by his side kissed him on the cheek, muttering something in his ear and her responded with a tight smile. I held back my vomit from lunch because he doesn't deserve to see my bile. He made his way next to me, sitting on the desk with a blank expression. Clearing my throat to avoid eye contact the teacher began talking about our project, telling us that we should be at least on a two digit chapter.

"Okay guys, turn to your partners and tell them about what you think of the story so far then hand in your essays," he instructed. Desks scraping on the floor for students facing or sitting next to their partners. I glanced at Charlie and he does to me, sitting in an awkward silence. Neither of us budge. So me being the bigger person, I scooted over to him and open my book to where I left off.

"What chapter are you on?" I asked in a bored tone, not looking at him. He said nothing, so I looked up to him just staring at me hard like he might start a fire.

"What?" I asked oblivious.

"Are you serious?" He retorted.

"I just wanted to know what chapter you're on."

"You haven't returned my calls, and that's all you can say to me?" he whispered harshly.

"I'm on chapter ten, I think the part where she goes to the Rochester house and she saved him from the horse-"

"Hannah."

"Charlie," I responded in the same condescending tone.

"Fine, be like that." Another silence for a second, "I'm on chapter ten too and it's not saying much, only that he thought that she cursed the horse to hurt him."

"Yeah, what do you think about that?"

"I think she did."

"Why would she do that? She just got there and he was on the ground."

"For attention."

"That's stupid," I frowned.

"She comes out of nowhere, he's on his horse peacefully then the horse just freaks out and leaves him hurt. She probably did that so she can get money from him."

"What would she need money for? She doesn't care about that. She did it to be nice."

"Maybe he didn't need her help."

"So she should just leave him there to die?"

"Yeah, he could fend for himself."

"He hurt his leg, he couldn't walk."

"He's a man."

"You're a moron. She helped him, he's fine."

"I'm not a moron and he didn't need her help from some chick."

"I didn't peg you to be so sexist."

"Then I guess you don't know me at all," I rolled my eyes and leaned back on my chair, annoyed and offended by his statements. Jane just helped Mr. Rochester, and he's thinking that Mr. Rochester should fend for himself. This better be an act.

"So if I saw you hurt on the ground almost bleeding to death, I should just leave you there so you can do it yourself?"

"Yeah, I don't need you."

I scoffed, shaking my head and say "Whatever, then you're gonna regret me not helping you when you're seriously injured."

"I already regret being with you." Did he just say to me? I fought so hard not to cry right now, because we're in class and I refuse to let anyone see it. I held it in, not talking to him as I turned my attention to the board. I don't want to look into his blue eyes at all. I wish I could just forget his face but I can't. Thank the heavens that the bell rang; turning in my essay, not caring if Charlie turned in his I rushed out of there. Don't cry, Hannah, you're strong so be strong. My uncle couldn't pick me up so I walked home. It looked like Linda is staying after so I'm by myself, kicking rocks with my head down going home thoughts muddled of confusion and sadness. It's for the best probably that it's over. But there's something pulling in my chest, what he said to me in class, he doesn't have to be so cruel. And I have to face him again at his house for our book report. FML.