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Chapter 7: You're Not Joking

I know it's not Monday but I am just so excited about this book that I want you guys to share my excitement. What better way to share this excitement then releasing chapters as often as I can?

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DarlaH

Stella POV

"So homecoming is coming up in three weeks. Are you planning to come?" Alice asked with a smile as she wiggled her eyebrows at me in front of the school building.

I shrugged as I stuffed my hands in my loose fitting jeans as I tried to play it cool. "School dances aren't really my thing," I said, but instantly regretted saying that when I saw the look of disappointment on her face. "But I'm willing to try," I quickly added, as if that would save me.

Alice beamed, then wrapped her arms around me with a cheer. "We should go to dress shopping together. Gosh it would be so much fun."

"Sure," I said, knowing full well what I was getting myself into. There was a reason I never went to these, but being in a large school, no one cared if I didn't go. Here, everyone would care so I would go or at least everyone to know if I didn't go and I couldn't let that happen.

"Great! Let's do that next weekend!"

"Sounds good. Anyhow, I have a test to study for so I'll talk to you later," I said, then waved her off so I could have some peace and quiet as I tried to wrap my mind around what I just agreed to do.

"Are you sure you don't want a ride?"

I shook my head as I looked at the bike standing alone at the bike rack just to the right of us. Instead of asking dad for a ride this morning, I took this to get to school. I am not sure what came over me to decide this, but maybe it was the fact that dad looked so excited that I was doing so. "I have to ride this back."

"I have a bike rack we can stick it on."

Of course she did. "Nah, thanks for the offer, but I think I should try to get some exercise since my dad wants to take me out. I'm not nearly as fit as he is," I said with a chuckle, using that as an excuse when I knew he would never take me. He was always too busy, and it would remain the same until I left. But she didn't know that so that meant it was a perfect excuse.

"I understand! Say no more. I will talk to you later!" she said, then walked to her car without another word.

I breathed a sigh of relief as she walked away from me. Normally she was ok to deal with, but today there was something she said that rubbed me the wrong way. When I asked about Gray not being in school for the second day in a row, she shrugged her shoulders and said, 'good riddance'.

Her words had such spite in them, as if he had wronged her. But I knew that Grayson had done nothing to her or her friends. He said nothing and was completely alone most times. How could she be ok with wishing ill on someone that was not causing any damage to her? Yes, people said he was a killer, but how could they believe it when he wasn't in prison. As difficult as Grayson was, he didn't deserve the hate he received.

I got on my bike and peddled back home as Grayson stuck in my mind like gum at the bottom of a shoe. How could a whole school hate someone so much like they did Grayson? It couldn't be solely because he was an outsider, because I was an outsider myself and they loved me.

My thoughts came to a crashing halt when I spotted Grayson in a gray sweater wading through waist deep grass. There was a scowl on his face, which made me believe he dropped something and was trying to find it. I watched him for a minute in silence, as he was completely unaware of me watching. He swore lightly, then threw a rock in frustration.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, bringing him to the realization that he wasn't alone.

He stopped what he was doing to frown at me. "What are you doing?" he retorted, meeting my questions with another one as if I was doing something wrong.

"You haven't been in school the last two days. Are you ok?" I asked as I got off my bike to look at him, making sure he was truly ok. Two days ago, he was in such rough shape but as I stared at him currently, he looked completely fine. It was as if he was never attacked.

"I'm fine."

"Yeah it looks like it," I mumbled with sass.

"What does that mean?"

"Exactly what you think it does," I said as a placed my hands on my hips, trying to appear larger than I was. Gray was not a massive guy, but he still towered over my small frame.

Gray sighed as he eased tensions between us almost instantly by this simple gesture. He stuffed his hands into his pockets as he thought in silence. "I wanted to tell you the other day, thanks for offering to help. I think you are literally the only person in school that would do something like that for me."

His words melted any tension building up within me. I wonder if he knew the spell he threw on me when he softened his words. The sadness in his tone reminded me of what Alice said today. The school hated him, and they would never think about helping him, even if he was in trouble. "So, how did you heal so quickly?"

"Who says I'm healed?" he frowned, making me doubt he was fine.

I gave a chuckle, but quickly stopped as I looked at his serious face. "You're not joking, are you?"

He shook his head with a straight face, but I didn't believe him. He looked fine but in the back of my mind I knew he was hiding something from me, maybe everything. Behind his dark blue eyes, held secrets he would keep to the grave, that much I was sure of.

There was silence for a moment as we let the wind whip our faces. "So you'll be back at school tomorrow?"

He shrugged. "Probably. Will you be at school tomorrow?"

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Seriously?" I had no reason to skip.

He chuckled, which made me realize I don't think I've ever heard him laugh before. "I've got to make sure if it's worth it for me to make an appearance since you're the only one that cares to pay attention to me."

"The others are missing out," I said before I knew what I said.

He gave me a pointed look as his smile slid from his face. "Are they though?"

Once again, his words had enough force behind them that they made me question whether or not he was a good guy. Maybe Gray was dangerous, maybe he was a killer. "Yeah?"

He shrugged. "Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow then Stella," he said as he looked back at the grass, showing that he was done talking to me.

"I guess you will." Convinced that I would see him, whether that be in school or outside of school. I would see Gray again and I think deep down, he knew that too. With that, I got on my bike and continued on my path, refusing to look back at him.

By time I made it home, my mind swirled like water draining from the tub with thoughts about Grayson. Why was he in the grass? How was he healthy? I saw him two days ago and he could barely stand on his own, but there he was, standing in the grass like he belonged there. There were times when I wanted to listen to the school rumors, but those moments were few. Talking to him today was another realization that Grayson was pushing everyone away, but I didn't understand why.

Breaking me from my thoughts was when I saw Bec crying at the kitchen island. I frowned, as I remembered hearing her cry last time. I should have heard it as I walked up the stairs, but I was so caught up in my thoughts to notice. Knowing I shouldn't have intruded on her private moment, I quickly turned on my heels to go back downstairs before she noticed me.

"You don't have to go," Bec said with a sniffle as she wiped her eyes, causing me to freeze.

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I slowly turned to face her as she continued to cry silently. "Are you ok?" I asked, unsure what else to ask her. If she wanted to be alone, she would have let me walk away, but yet I was here looking at her and her watery eyes.

"I will be," she sniffled as she regained herself.

We let silence fill the space between us as we stared at each other, but it wasn't an awkward stare instead, it was full of understanding. "Do you want to talk about it?" I asked carefully, hoping I didn't cross any lines.

She was silent for a moment, and it made me realize that I probably stepped over a line. "I had another miscarriage," she whispered.

Her honesty took me off guard, causing me to take a step back since I never expected her to say this. "I didn't know you guys were trying for kids." I just assumed that I would be an only child. My father was busy and if he didn't have time for me, he for sure didn't have time for another child, but who was I to say anything about that.

She nodded slowly. "We both want at least one, but I've been trying for almost a year, and I just had my third miscarriage."

Her voice had so much pain in it, it made my heart ache. "Does my dad know?" I asked as I walked towards her. Now it made sense why she was crying a few days ago. It was about this.

She bit her lip as she shook her head. "Not this last one, no. He just gets so heartbroken, and it makes me feel even worse, like it's my fault that I can't keep any. And he's so busy, I don't want to be a distraction."

I felt a pang of resentment toward my father. He was a busy guy but the two women in his house were struggling with their own problems, and he didn't notice. He was supposed to be there for us, but he was too busy trying to provide for the physical needs that he forgot about the emotional ones.

I grabbed her hands and squeezed them. This was the first time I held her hands, and I never realized how small and thin they were in mine. As she looked at me, she looked so small and broken, as if she didn't know where to turn to. It made me wonder if she had anyone since she was talking to me about this, a stepdaughter she barely knew. "Don't you think that. It's not your fault! And as your husband, you have a right to be distracted by this."

She nodded as she took a deep breath. "What if I can't have children?"

I shrugged, as if the answer was simple. "You will solve the problem when it comes to it."

She frowned as she let out a shaky breath.

"One step at a time. Don't think too far into the future, it will just bury you in worry," I said as I remembered my mother saying something similar to me not too long ago.

"Sometimes it's hard not to."

I nodded, knowing what she meant. As humans, it was hard not to plan for the future. We allowed ourselves to drown in it sometimes, but drowning in fear didn't help anything and it surely didn't help plan for the future. I was guilty of over planning myself. I would plan years out in advance because I could predict things better, but that did nothing for me.

She sniffled again as calmed herself down. Once again, we were silent as we held hands, unwilling to let go of the other as if it would break some kind of bond we made. "I don't know what I would do without you. You being here means more to me then I can share."

I smiled at her lightly, welcoming her words. Bec had been nothing but kind to me since I arrived and for the past few weeks, I just felt like an inconvenience to her, but as she held my hands, I felt like I belonged here, that I wasn't an outsider, but I always belonged here in this house, with them. "Thank you."

She nodded and brought me into a warm hug, holding me tightly as if we were always friends. "Of course."

I pulled out of her embrace and asked, "let me make us some tea." With that, I put a pot to boil. "My mom would always make me tea when terrible stuff happened. She said it helped calm the roughest of seas."

"Did it work?"

For me, hardly ever, but my mom swore by it. She said with tea; she was always calm. I think she just knew how to handle her emotions better than I ever did. "Most times, yeah."

"Then I should have at least three cups," she said, giving a humorless chuckle as if this predicament was solely her own fault.

"You need to talk to my dad about this. He needs to know. Don't listen to your doubts about it. He is your husband, and he is here to support you."

"You're right. I need to."

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