Just a very quick note! Please read this before I get any angry comments: because both cc!Ranboo and cc!Tubbo have confirmed their characters - I stress 'characters' here - are in a romantic relationship on the DSMP, they are portrayed as romantic in this fic. It can be interpreted as queer-platonic if that would make you feel more comfortable and they'll refer to each other as 'partner' instead of 'boyfriend'.

Nothing from the relationship will cross the creators' boundaries in any way and their relationship will not be a heavy focus. I just thought I ought to tell my readers quickly in order to enforce the 'don't like, don't read' policy. I reiterate again that this will not be a focus in the story, nor will it affect the plot and characters in any way.

Simply, for this fic, the beeduo characters are in a romantic/queer-platonic relationship and you can take that how you will.

Now, sorry for the long note! Let's get into your fanfic :)

TW: Attempted mugging

Ranboo woke up at eight in the evening. He could hear Tubbo humming loudly outside and the TV blaring. With a groan, he rolled over and rubbed his eyes, yawning loudly with exhaustion. Reluctantly, he pulled off his duvet and crawled out of bed, shivering slightly in the chilly air. Most nights, he'd wake up a little later, after a much longer sleep but, alas, Tommy had been very determined to use the hybrid as his personal taxi on a daily basis recently.

With another loud yawn, Ranboo stretched his arms high above his head, grimacing. He walked out of his bedroom, slumped a little, and blinked in the harsh, bright light of the living room.

Tubbo was lounging on the sofa, scrolling idly on his phone, and looked up when his partner emerged. "Hey, Ranboo," He greeted, with a fond smile. "You look awful."

"Shut it," Ranboo groaned, walking over to him. "I don't wanna work today."

The smallers' smile widened and reached up for the hybrid, gently tugging him down onto the sofa next to him. "Call in sick. We can re-watch The Office, or go on a walk. Nothing vigilante about it; just me and you."

"Honestly, it sounds lovely," Ranboo sighed, leaning his head on top of Tubbo's. "But I called in sick last night to help with the warehouse thing. I don't want to call in ill too often."

"It won't be suspicious," Tubbo tried, wrapping one arm around Ranboo so he could hug his partner while still looking through Twitter. "I mean, you're 'sick' and need one more night to recover." He looked up with a cheeky grin. "You may even need three!"

Ranboo smiled a little, settling down closer into Tubbo's embrace. "I don't want to start seeming like I'm slacking, though. I want this job, remember?"

"It's not slacking if you are in desperate need of recovery!" Tubbo replied peppily. "You might be dying for all they know. And you totally are. And your dying wish is to re-watch The Office with me one last time."

The hybrid raised an eyebrow. "Not so sure that's my dying wish."

"It is now."

"Whatever," Ranboo sighed, amused, and closed his eyes softly. "Ugh, you are, really, such a bad influence."

"Mm, yes, I am. Now close your eyes and sleep. I'll wake you up after I called your work to say you can't come in." His voice was quieter then, soft and warm like a lullaby. He even began to gently stroke Ranboo's head, running his fingertips through his hair rhythmically. It was, all in all, very sleep-inducing.

"Bad Toby," He murmured as his shoulders loosened and his muscles relaxed. "Very bad..."

Tubbo pressed a kiss to his forehead. "I know."

"Ew."

Ranboo jumped awake, turning around, and Tubbo startled too, spinning his head like a terrified owl, only for the both of them to find Tommy standing in the doorway of his room, hair damp and a repulsed sneer on his face.

"Ew," He repeated, giving the pair a judgemental stare.

Ranboo flushed. "What do you mean, 'ew'? Shut up!"

"Piss off, Tommy," Tubbo yelled at him. "I'm trying to be cute and loving over here!"

"And it's gross," The blond answered, with an accompanying shudder. "Ranboo, go make dinner and be a good housemaid. Tubbo, stop being a harlot."

"Harlot?!" Tubbo scoffed incredulously.

"Housemaid?!" Ranboo hissed indignantly.

"You both heard me," Tommy replied, rolling his eyes.

Ranboo glared. "I'm not your mum, Tommy. I won't just cook when you ask me to."

"But Tubbo's hungry, too."

There was a pause. The enderman's glare darkened. "How dare you use Tubbo as blackmail. Fine. What do you want for dinner?"

Tommy grinned. "There's a packet of breaded chicken breasts in the fridge. Could you cook those and then microwave a vegetable pot?"

Ranboo, who had been trying to disentangle himself from Tubbo's arms, stopped and stared at his blond friend in disbelief. "You can do those things yourself."

"You do it better than me."

"Tommy, I need you to understand that I am not your servant."

"Ranboo, I need you to understand, you must cook my dinner."

The hybrid scowled. "This is my flat. I can throw you out."

"But you won't." Tommy grinned triumphantly. "Will you?" Ranboo began moving off the sofa again, grumbling grouchily. Tommy beamed. "Thought not."

"I think you're just jealous," Tubbo told his friend loudly, "that I'd rather re-watch The Office with Ranboo instead of you."

Tommy made a face. "I'm not jealous. I can re-watch The Office fine without you."

Ranboo walked into the kitchen, rolling his eyes. "You're jealous," He called over his shoulder as he opened the fridge. A loud, indignant noise from the blond could be heard from the other room.

Tubbo yelled out and a crash sounded from the main room. Ranboo winced, checking the time needed for the chicken as he made his way to the oven.

"Boo! Tommy pushed me off the sofa!"

"Tommy! Don't push Tubbo off the sofa!"

There was grumbling behind him and Ranboo turned to see Tommy walking in, a scowling pout on his face. "He asked for it."

"Oh, yeah? What did he do?"

"He made stupid faces at me," Tommy grumbled, sitting on a chair at the table.

Ranboo hummed, setting the ovens' temperature. "Well, be the bigger person next time."

"I already am the bigger person," Tommy sighed. "Tubbo's only five-foot-five!"

"Suck my balls, Tommy!" Tubbo shouted from the living room.

Tommy groaned and turned to Ranboo pleadingly. "I'm sorry I called you a housewife," He started in a pitiful tone, "Can you please lock Tubbo in his room for me?"

"No can do," Ranboo smiled. "You two have to get along tonight. I'll be working."

"Call in sick!"

Ranboo rolled his eyes. "Oh, not you too. I can't, Tommy. I want this job and it gets me out of the flat. If I call in sick too many times, they won't like it."

"But you rarely call in sick," Tommy urged, "Come on, Ranboo, if you 'shake it off' by tomorrow night, there'll barely be a problem."

"Stop encouraging me to skip work. You're a bad influence."

Tommy grinned hopefully. "Is my encouragement working?"

Ranboo grinned back. "Nope! Not in the slightest."

Tubbo walked into the kitchen and wandered over to his partner hugging him tightly. "You stay. We watch The Office. The pizzeria never needs to know."

The hybrid sighed, slouching in Tubbo's arms. "You two are so annoying sometimes." The oven beeped and he gently shoved the short one off him. "One second, gotta put the chicken in."

Tommy leaned on the table. "Just stay with us tonight, bossman! You didn't get to rest yesterday night so you should be able to now!"

"No, I can't," Ranboo insisted, fiddling with oven gloves even if he didn't need them. "I've got to work."

"Aw, come on!" Tried Tubbo again. "Just stay. Please."

Ranboo turned around after closing the oven on the chicken, a small glare on his face. "Okay, seriously. What's up with you two?"

The two of them glanced at each other and the enderman twitched an eyebrow when they both looked away, hurriedly.

"It's just boring without ya," Tommy tried and, although he sounded convincing, the lie was thick and plain to see. "You deserve a break, anyways."

"And I want hugs," Insisted Tubbo. "We can cuddle if you stay. And we don't even need to watch The Office."

"This is about your fight, isn't it?"

The kitchen fell silent. Tubbo let go of his partner's hand and Tommy averted his eyes anxiously to the wall.

Ranboo wrinkled his nose. "I should've known. You've been avoiding each other all day because of it." Tubbo winced a little and Tommy's face crinkled in a silent sneer. "Oh, honestly, get over yourselves. You were both tired and snappy so you said things you didn't mean. Come on, you both know this won't be your last straw. Apologise and make up."

"It's nothing to do with the fight," Tommy muttered but all three of them were aware of the utter bullshit he just said. "You've just been... working really hard."

Tubbo just left the kitchen, without a word. 

"I can't believe you: the pair of you," Ranboo sighed, leaning back on the counter. "You're both acting like children and it's a little pathetic."

"Tubbo started it," Growled Tommy, balling his fists.

"Yeah? Well, watch me finish it. I'm going to the pizzeria and you two shall forgive and forget. Hell, go on an online shopping spree for all I care. I've got work to get to and I'll be leaving soon."

Tommy looked up, eyes wide. "Soon?" He echoed. "But you've got ages!"

The hybrid pushed off the counter, not sparing the blond a glance. "Get over your crap, Tom. I'm leaving the pair of you two it and, if anything's damaged in the flat I pay for when I get back, I'm sending you both out packing. Do I make myself clear?"

There was a moment of silence. "Crystal clear," Tommy hissed, bowing his head.

"Good. I'll see you later."

Ranboo left the kitchen and made his way to his room. He got out of his pyjamas and into jeans and a hoodie. He kept his uniform in his locker, so he'd change later. Dropping his phone into one pocket and his keys into the other, he was ready to go.

"Bye!" He called over his shoulder as he left the flat.

"Goodbye!" His flatmates called after him, the cheeriness obviously forced.

Ranboo closed the door behind him and made his way through the corridor. He took the stairs down and left the block of apartments in a flash. It was windier than it had been when he was last out, and the night's darkness brought a chill to the breeze that made him pull his hoodie a little tighter around his neck and shudder a little.

It wasn't too dark yet, although that might've been the streetlamps. The hybrid walked down the road, hands in his pockets and ears pricked. It wasn't like he was listening out for criminals or wrong'uns - it was more like he was making sure no one was going to try and jump him. He made it onto the main road and watched how the sea of headlights flashing past lit up what had previously been a dark evening.

Squinting a little, he made his way down the pavement, side-stepping partygoers and avoiding marching business people. He weaved his way both against and with the ongoing traffic, following when hordes of people flooded a red traffic light and crossed the road.

It was only ten minutes into his walk when Ranboo realised he had left far too early. He had rushed himself out of the house in order for Tubbo and Tommy to not use him as an excuse to avoid each other but he still had plenty of time to waste until he actually needed to head to the pizzeria. It probably wouldn't even be properly closed yet. 

So he sidled away from the flow of people awkwardly. Arriving early to work would be a little odd, maybe. Perhaps it would be better to whittle away at the time. Ranboo leaned against a wall, pulling out his phone. Texts from Tubbo, asking him to come back because he was lonely. Texts from Tommy, saying he was going to visit a friend. The hybrid sighed and ignored both of the notifications. He also ignored the notifications from his mothers.

He still didn't want to talk to them yet.

"Excuse me?"

Ranboo looked up at the voice.

The voice belonged to a well-dressed man, brows furrowed in stress and mouth drawn into a tight, scared line. "I'm sorry, but could I take up a couple minutes of your time? I really need some help."

Ranboo stood up straighter. "What's the matter?"

"It's my mate - David. He's just fallen over, in that alley there," the man gestured behind him. "He's been a bit sick recently and he just... well, he just toppled over. Please, I know it looks shady in there but that's why I got to get him out!"

The hybrid hesitated, flicking a tongue across his lips. "Wouldn't you rather call someone a bit stronger? I'm not the best at lifting things, let alone people."

"Please," The man pleaded. "No one else is stopping to help. You're the first one who's not ignored me!"

Ranboo put his phone back in his pocket, sighing. "Yeah, alright. I'll help you out. His name's David, you said?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm Caleb, by the way."

"Nice to meet you." Ranboo gave him a smile and then let Caleb lead him to the alleyway. He glanced around behind him briefly and saw a figure on a rooftop nearby. 

He frowned at it but didn't have much time to pay attention to it when Caleb called, "Hurry up!"

"Yep, sorry." Ranboo walked in, blinking in order to adjust his eyes to the darkness. "Where's your friend?"

"A little further in. He said we'd be taking a shortcut this way and then he just- his legs went and he's not responding anymore!"

The enderman felt something gnawing slightly in his chest - and, by gnawing, he meant viciously biting and ripping at him with the uncomfortable hunch of "trap". Ranboo couldn't see the shape of anyone down there, unconscious or not. But he kept walking down anyway, keeping his ears pricked for the sound of movement behind him.

He heard 'Caleb's footsteps change slightly and softly in their pace and Ranboo could feel the way his forehead throbbed in desperation to let the horns grow and his body shift. He needed to protect himself and, without Tommy or Tubbo, it was highly unlikely this guy would be distracted enough to let him knock him out.

"I don't see your friend," He decided to say, coming to a quick stop.

"You'll be him in a second," Muttered a new voice, and Ranboo watched as a new person stepped out. He was dressed in dark clothes and looked rather bulgy in all the wrong places.

A third person, a rather muscular woman with shortly cut hair and a dozen piercings stepped out next. "Ooh, he's got a pretty face," She cooed, reaching out a hand to stroke his cheek. Ranboo pulled back with a clear grimace. "What a shame... That pretty face won't look so good once we've got all your cash."

"If you know what's good for you," Ranboo said lowly, feeling some of his bones ache as they tried to grow, "You'll let me go right now and we won't have a problem."

"Ooh, how terrifying," 'Caleb' said and the point of a knife was pressed into the small of Ranboo's back. "Listen, mate, just give us your shit and we'll let you go, unharmed."

"Mostly unharmed," chuckled the second man, with a slightly sadistic grin.

"Back off," warned Ranboo again, straightening his spine.

"Why should we?" Whined the woman, bringing out a knife of her own. "We only want a lil' donation."

"Yeah," Agreed 'Caleb'. "Can't you help us pay for David's medicine?"

Ranboo was shoved to the ground and he landed expertly enough not to scrape the skin on his palms. His skin was thinner as an enderman, anyway. The second man stood above him with a little grin. "Alright, then, pretty boy. Where'd you keep that walle-?"

He was cut off instantly when something black and shining flew at him, catching him in the face harder and faster than any punch. Ranboo stared, shocked, as some of the black something peeled back to swing itself at 'Caleb', grappling his arms to his chest. The rest of the metal flew fast from the second man and latched itself around the woman's head, sending her back into the wall, trapped.

There were the sounds of click-clicking footsteps and, the next thing Ranboo knew, a red cape filled his vision as someone stooped down to pick up the second man by the collar.

As the second man paled and Ranboo felt his heart stop, The Blood God narrowed his eyes disapprovingly. "You're under arrest," Was all he said, in a manner shockingly similar to Jubilee Line.

The black things around the other two went flying back and formed the netherite brace around the piglin's arm. The Blood God didn't hesitate to cuff the second man and also wasted no time grappling 'Caleb' and binding him too. The woman was unconscious yet the Blood God cuffed her anyway.

Then, he turned to Ranboo. Another criminal.

"You," He said, in a deep, apathetic voice. Ranboo flinched back when the Blood God knelt down to him. "Are you hurt?"

"I..." Ranboo paused. Of course, he wouldn't recognise him. He wasn't looking like Enderling. He looked normal. "No, I'm fine."

"That's good," The Blood God said, standing up. He offered out a hand and, against all his better judgement, Ranboo took it. "Did they do anything to you that I should know of beyond attempted mugging?"

"No, they didn't. They had knives, though."

The hero nodded, calmly. "I did notice. If there's nothing you wish to report, citizen, then you may continue with your evening. But, please, try to be more careful when walking into creepy alleyways with strangers." The piglin looked around calmly. "This place looks like the resting place for Batmans' parents."

Ranboo choked on his laugh, utterly surprised by the attitude. "Yeah. Yeah, I'll try. Thank you."

"No problem. Doing my duties." The Blood God bowed very, very slightly. "Good night."

"G'night..." Ranboo turned to walk away. When he glanced over his shoulder at the bottom of the alley, the Blood God and the three muggers were gone. He shuddered a little. "Talk about professionalism. Didn't even get a scratch on him..."