⚠️ TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️
THIS CHAPTER CONTAINS MENTIONS OF SELF HARM. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Chapter 23

You've got this, Belles.

He can't hurt you in there.

He's literally surrounded by guards and will be in handcuffs.

Repeating these words in my head, I looked up from my seat in the visitor's room. I didn't say a word about this to anyone, but I needed to see him one last time to tell him that he will never hurt me again.

I shook my hands and wiped my palms on my knees-a nervous habit I was never able to break. Zach was blowing up my phone asking where I was because he wanted me to go to Kayden's parents' barbecue with him. If he found out I was here about to talk to Gray, he would blow a gasket.

I silenced my phone and slid it into my back pocket as I waited for the sound of footsteps approaching the table. A buzz echoed across the room, followed by footsteps heading in my direction.

There he stood.

In an orange jumpsuit with his hands in handcuffs. His face showed no emotion as he looked me dead in the eye. Even in a jumpsuit, not one ounce of remorse was present in his eyes.

It sounded stupid, but I actually felt remorse that he was born without a heart and to be an evil monster. At least he was getting what he deserved. He plopped himself on the chair and slouched against the back. He remained silent, waiting for me to speak first. There was no need to beat around the bush.

"Why did you bring a gun to my school? What made you so pissed off, you wanted to kill everyone?"

He scoffed. "Everyone? I didn't give a shit about anyone else."

Anyone else?

"What do you mean 'anyone else'?"

His eyes darkened. "I saw you kissing your little boyfriend."

My heart just about flatlined when he lifted me off the floor and wrapped my legs around his waist. The butterflies were throwing a rager in my stomach with each kiss and I pressed my lips to prevent moans from escaping my mouth when he threw me on my bed.

His lips briefly left mine only to ask me if it was okay to touch me. To kiss me anywhere else but my lips. I appreciated what he was doing.

He was trying to not trigger a panic attack and I loved him for that, but I just wanted him to shut up so my tongue could explore every corner of his mouth. The noises from the TV downstairs and the loud thud coming from outside became background noise.

Sleep was a pipe dream that night on account of spending half the night tossing and turning as I was wondering if someone was out there. Whether it was Gray or some random robber who selected our house out of all the others in the neighborhood.

Questions about why they were there or what their intentions were were bouncing around in my head. At least now, I was at ease knowing who it was. It wasn't the best idea to antagonize him. To ask him if he really wanted to shoot us just because he was a little jealous he saw me kissing another man. I kept my mouth shut about that. "Why were you even watching me?"

"I had to make sure you didn't encourage your hot friend to report me."

I scoffed and shook my head in disbelief. Not one hint of amusement was in his eyes. Of course he was serious.

Look where that took you.

Back in prison.

Which was exactly why you didn't want Olive to report you.

Wise move on your part.

It was time to move on to my next question. "Why me? I was an innocent little girl. Never did anything wrong. Always spread kindness. You flirted with me at the coffee shop and my life had never been the same since. You fucked up my life and for what? Nothing? That wasn't fair. I didn't deserve any of that."

For a second, just for a second, a somber expression touched his eyes. Upon closer examination, you could see a lonely tear forming in his eye and he didn't even bother wiping it away.

"Yeah well," he shrugged and shook his head. "I didn't do anything to deserve losing my parents at ten years old in a car accident. Nor did I deserve my foster parents treating me like shit, making me feel suicidal even. I almost hung myself once."

Gray paused and suddenly shifted uncomfortably in his chair. Being open and vulnerable to the girl he tormented for months clearly made him feel awkward. "Their main priority was that if they lost me, they'd stop getting checks every month. That was the only reason why they stopped me. I was... the only kid they've adopted who followed orders, did chores and walked to the grocery store without complaining. They didn't want to adopt anyone else."

He wasn't looking at me. He was staring off into space with his mind elsewhere, lost in the horrible memories of his childhood. He mumbled something under his breath. Gray didn't mean for me to hear it, but he said he wished he died with his parents.

All of that was new information for me. Even though he was a monster, my heart broke for him. He was still human. He didn't deserve to be treated like that. That explained why he treated me the way he did. Gray poured all his resentment onto me. That was no excuse, but I understood.

"I'm so sorry for your loss. But that doesn't give you the right to hurt me as much as you did. You think your parents would be proud of who you've become?"

"Don't talk about my parents," he snapped with gritted teeth. He leaned back against the chair, but you could see  that he knew I was right.

"Look, I only came here to tell you that you're not gonna hurt me anymore. I'm done being terrorized by you, the nightmares and the memories. I'm moving on. And I'm making sure you regret everything you did to me."

A hair-raising, malicious chuckle left his lips as he rolled his head back. I was taken by surprise at this reaction. His reaction was unpredictable, but I certainly wasn't expecting him to laugh.

Once his chuckles slowed down, Gray leaned forward. "The only thing I regret is not killing your boyfriend."

That's it.

I said what I needed to say.

Now I'm done.

There was no other way to respond to that other than by flipping him off. I pushed my chair away from that bastard and stormed away. A sense of pride that I was able to overcome my trauma washed over me and I couldn't help the grin that took over my face.

-

Zach was in the living room playing his video games with one of his little twin brothers, Logan. Jackson was playing with their remote controlled truck as he laid on his stomach, a bored expression in his features. Sat right by the front door were his duffle bags of clothes with the LA Lakers logo printed on the black material. Zach sprung up from his seat not even a full second after he saw me.

"Where the hell were you? I've been trying to get a hold of you." He looked me up and down and took note of my condition. Wiping my sweaty palms on my legs, twiddling fingers and my eyes flitting everywhere in the room but at his eyes. "Please don't tell me you were visiting you-know-who."

A breath I didn't realize I was holding in was released and my tense shoulders relaxed. He didn't seem upset with me. He waved me off and shook his head.

"Belles, it's fine if you did. There are guards everywhere and how the hell could he hurt you with his hands in cuffs? I'm just glad you're okay." Zach pulled me in in his arms and squeezed me hard, like someone was going to take me away from him and he'll never see me again. He had gotten into the habit of doing that a lot more often since the shooting, on the contrary to his rules of physical forms of affections.

"Now, come on. We can't be late for this barbecue. You're the guest of honor," he casually slipped as if I would have any idea why they would be celebrating me. Zach broke the hug and held my hand toward the door.

"What the hell do you mean I'm the guest of honor?"

"What, did you think that we'd let the fact that the man that tormented you for months is finally back in prison for good go without a celebration?"

"I thought going to the beach was the celebration."

Zach cocked his head to the side. "True, but... you know the Taylors. Any excuse to use that fancy barbeque they bought last summer."

We didn't go to Kayden's place very often. Either he went to mine, to Zach's or the beach, but his parents had a beautiful house. They had a spacious backyard with a pool that took up most of the space, palm trees lining the driveway and a good, two thousand square acres of gray walls and luxurious furniture.

Kayden's parents approached us in the backyard. Kelly's brown hair that landed past her shoulders was tied up in a ponytail, her blue eyes were darker than Kayden's and she was casually dressed in an oversized sweater with leggings and Ugg boots.

Drew had dark hair, bright blue eyes that were smiling with his lips and was wearing a black hoodie paired with jeans and boots. Kelly was the first one to squeeze me in an embrace.

"I'm so happy for you!" She pulled away and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. "That man is finally behind bars for the rest of his sad, pathetic life. You don't have to worry about him anymore, baby."

"Thanks, Mrs. Taylors," I replied with a bright smile.

"Kayden is still in his room getting ready," Drew chimed in with his thumb gesturing toward the house. He told me where his room was and I followed his directions upstairs to the first door on the right. Shortly after I knocked, he answered the door, but his eyes weren't the first things that caught my attention.

My eyes scanned his six-pack, water droplets falling from his hair to his chest. The towel hung loosely around his waist. I bit my bottom lip and felt drool dripping in the corner.

Pull yourself together, Isabella Price!

Shaking the dirty thoughts out of my head and clearing my throat, I forced myself to focus on his eyes. A heat permeated my cheeks and neck when a deep chuckle vibrated in his chest.

"I'm sorry. I thought you were my dad." He stepped aside. "Come in. I just need to finish getting ready."

My feet carried me around the room. My back faced Kayden so I didn't make a fool out of myself again. I took in the decor of his room. There was a framed football jersey with the number '11' along with an unrecognizable last name.

He had a desk tucked in the corner with his laptop and textbooks neatly stacked by the side. Shelves were mounted on the wall with framed photos of his family.

There was one from his family trip to New York during the winter time. Snowflakes landed in their hair, they were dressed in heavy layers and their smiles reached their eyes for the camera. His arm was draped over his little sister's shoulder and his sister was making a goofy face.

There was one picture in particular that caught my attention. It was of me, Zach and Kayden. We were at the beach with ice cream cones in our hands. Mom tied my hair up in curly pigtails and I was smiling so bright, my eyes were closed.

Kayden was looking at me with an identical smile and Zach was focused on the camera, clearly oblivious to the admiration in his best friend's eyes as he looked at me.

I flinched when I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. My heart started spazzing out of control when Kayden left trails of soft kisses down my neck and shoulder.

"That was the moment I fell for you."

His whispers that fanned my face caused a shiver to crawl up my spine. My body temperature increased at the close proximity between us.

"What about you? When did you realize you liked me?"

Great.

That's all I need.

More embarrassment.

"Would you think I'm pathetic if I said I've loved you since day one?" My eyes were downcast in shame. I looked back up when I heard his deep chuckles echo through the room once again.

"Not at all. I was an adorable and... dare I say, lovable kid back then." Kayden continued to kiss my shoulder and pulled me against his chest. In the meantime, my palms were growing more sweaty.

"You know, there could be another occasion to celebrate with a barbecue."

My interest peaked. I tilted my head to give him more access and closed my eyes to focus on the feeling of his lips against my skin. My eyes snapped open when he stepped away, his hands rubbing the back of his neck. My body felt cold without his arms holding me.

"I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be kissing you like that considering how... you-know-who touched you."

But you're different!

More gentle.

Kind.

"I want you to kiss me like that." My heels spun around to face and my arms instinctively wrapped around his torso. "I trust you."

Lust was swarming in his eyes as he looked into mine. His hands lightly slid up my arm and wrapped around the back of my neck.

My stomach twisted into knots hearing our breaths intermingle and I swallowed a lump in my throat at the feeling of his warm hand on my cheek. I waited for his lips to connect with mine. They never did.

"As I was saying..." Kayden started in a low voice. I heard him gulp, but he never let go of me. "There could be another occasion to celebrate with a barbecue." His fingers played with my hair and his eyes remained trained on mine. I feared he could feel my quick heart rate with his hands on my neck. "You saying yes to my invitation to go on a date with me."

-

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AUTHOR'S NOTE-

This has to be my FAVORITE chapter I've written for this story! Between Bella looking like a badass as she walked away from Gray and the moment they shared in his bedroom, this is definitely the chapter I'm the most proud of.

It's even the longest one by far with 2K+ words (even before this note was added). I honestly thought it would be 1.6K-1.7K, but I was on a roll!