Chapter 16

She sat cross-legged with her fingers folded on her lap, waiting patiently for me to open my mouth. The original plan was to tell her everything that went down; how I felt when he held my hand while he was driving and thinking that I saw Kayden at frozen yogurt where he pinned me against the building and intensely kissed me. However, the guilt that I felt earlier rushed back in full force.

“Olive?”

“What?” A bright smile touched her lips, oblivious to the severe guilt that was gnawing at me. 

“I’m a bad person.”

Instantaneously, her eager smile was long forgotten. Lines creased her forehead as she narrowed her eyes and cocked her head to the side. “What the hell are you talking about?"

Everything spilled out: that Garrett was trying to make small talk and asked me if I ever had feelings for Zach. Even saying the words tasted like vomit on my tongue.

The thought of seeing Zach in more of a romantic way made the frozen yogurt climb up my esophagus. I proceeded with the rest of the details of how he, then, asked about my feelings for Kayden. The part that made me feel guilty in the first place. I lied. Then I kissed him with the mouth that just lied to him. Of course the last part was the only part Olive held onto. 

“You kissed? On the first date? How was it? Was it more like a slow, passionate kiss or an intense, tongue-in-mouth, hands on your hips, your souls on fire kind of kiss?”

I gave her a pointed look to say that I was being serious even though the tone in my voice should've been what clued her in. A sheepish smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

"Sorry. Not the point."

"He asked me, point blank, if I had any feelings for Kayden and I flat out lied. I am a horrible person! Here he is, a guy that had liked me since we were kids and I lied to him about my feelings. But, despite my previous feelings for Kayden, I actually felt something for Garrett. What if this lie is gonna bite me in the ass? What if he somehow finds out I was lying and his heart gets destroyed because of me?"
 
"Bella." Olive's hand landed on my wrist. "You didn't do anything wrong. This was your first date with him. What did he expect you to say? 'Oh yeah. I totally have feelings for Kayden. And by feelings, I mean that I'm madly, irrevocably in love with him. Anyways, do you want a bite of my frozen yogurt? It's really good'. You couldn't tell him the truth."

I sighed. She was right. No way should I have ruined our first date by revealing my true feelings. 

I wasn't a bad person, my inner voice reminded me over and over again until it got through to my brain.

-

It was the third class of the day and I was already anxious to get the hell out of this hell hole for the weekend. Being the nerd that I was, I copied the notes written on the whiteboard onto my notebook to prepare for the upcoming test.

Eventually, I began to feel a presence next to me and I looked up to see Kayden staring down at me. He looked distressed; his hair was tousled, he was rubbing the back of his neck and he was avoiding eye contact.

A small part of me still couldn't stand seeing him with another girl. Even after having spent the previous evening with a boy who checked off everything on my list of what made my dream boyfriend.

"How did the date go last night?" He didn't look as excited for me as Zach and Olive did when they asked me about the date.

In fact, his lips were in a straight line. Maybe he wanted to hear that the date didn't go so well because he wanted me all to himself.

Hello.

It's me again.

Your inner voice.

Wake the fuck up, sister.

If you honestly think that he wants you, you need a cold, hard reality check, my friend.

I mentally slapped myself for even considering that was a possibility. He had a girlfriend and I shouldn't get my hopes up too high. He had to know I didn't have any romantic feelings toward him. "I had a really fun time last night. We're even going to Angela's birthday-slash-Halloween party together."

Kayden didn't respond; his lips formed the shape of a frown and he was nibbling on his bottom lip. However, he still made no move to return to his seat. He lingered at my desk, his mind clearly elsewhere.

"Is that okay?"

Whatever trance he was in, he snapped out of it. “Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t it be? I'll see you there, I guess.” He mumbled the last part and approached his desk. Furrowing my brows, my eyes followed his every move and he weaved his fingers through his hair.

Okay...

What the hell just happened?

-

During lunch was my time to complete any extra credit assignment my teachers gave me in order to give my grades the boost they needed. My head was even buried in my textbook to block out any distractions and it was working until I saw a lunch tray plop on the table.

"Only a nerd will take their lunch period to work on extra credit. Who even needs credit? Period?"

"Everyone?"

"What's up with Kayden today? Just now, when I passed him on the way to the table, there was this... look in his eye. Somber? Melancholy? I don't know what you would call it, but let's just say, he looked less than thrilled."

"I don't know. Actually, he was weird at the beginning of last class. He asked me how the date went. He had no smile, he was lost in thought after I told him the date went well and then, he just walked away."

Olive was making eye contact with me, but her mind was elsewhere. She was biting her nails and would scrunch her face up like she was trying to figure something out. The light bulb turned on and her lips were in an opened, wide smile. "Maybe—..." She was distracted by something behind us.

I spun around in my seat and saw Angela rubbing Kayden's arm, but he was paying her no attention. His fork picked up his spaghetti, but then he'd drop it right back on the plate and it looked like he was mentally not there. A finger tapped my shoulder and I found Garrett with his hands behind his back. "I hadn't seen you all day. Where were you?"

"I had no idea that it was your birthday that night of the party." A cute smile grew on his face and I never noticed it before, but there were laugh lines around his lips. "I had to hear it from your best friend here and she insisted that I buy a gift. It's late, but I hope you still like it." He pulled out a gift bag from behind his back and lightly set it on the table in front of me.

This was unexpected. We only went on one date last night so I was taken aback, but gifts were my love language. I wasn't about to question it.

With curiosity, I threw out the tissue paper and found a small Pandora box at the bottom. I glanced up at Garrett with the corners of my lips lifting upward into an excited smile. He gestured for me to open it and when I did, I was greeted by a gold charm bracelet.

All the charms represented everything I loved; a Christmas tree, a pumpkin with a smiley face carved into it, a snowflake because I'd always wanted to see snow, a wave, a palm tree and there was even a stethoscope charm that represented my dream of becoming a nurse. My jaw dropped at the most thoughtful gift I'd ever received and I immediately wrapped my arms around Garrett.

"Awwwww! I want one of those!" Olive interlocked her own fingers together and pouted her lips as she admired the bracelet in my hand.

"Thank you so much!"

"You're wel—... huh. What's going on with them?"

Olive and I turned around just in time to see Kayden storming off and Angela running after him. She was begging him to talk to her because something was clearly wrong, but he argued that they needed to talk about it later and that this wasn't the right place or time. Olive was stuffing her face with fries the whole time as she watched the soap-opera-like scene.

-

"First, he acted suspicious when I told him about the date, then, you told me he was looking down in the dumps and we saw that he wasn't paying Angela any attention while playing with his food and lastly, he just upped and walked away. Why is he acting weird all of a sudden?"

Olive and I were at the mall shopping for costumes for the Halloween party tomorrow.

We were currently in the fitting room while she was trying on a Barbie costume that consisted of a short pink dress, a blonde wig and pink heels. She was checking herself out in the mirror from each side angle, but she didn't look like she absolutely loved it.

She shrugged it off and took a seat next to me on the bench. "I started to say at lunch that maybe... he only started dating Angela to help himself get over you."

I rolled my eyes and scoffed at the ridiculous notion. "Yeah right. Nice try, but... nah."

"I'm serious! I swear to you he told me he liked you. Then, all of a sudden, he starts going out with a girl he never showed any interest in? I mean, come on. When you think about it, it makes perfect sense!"

"That is so not the case. Angela is supermodel gorgeous, she's a cheerleader and she was clearly born to be a model. He may not have shown her any interest before, but once they started talking at the party, he could've started to genuinely like her. I'm not letting you get my hopes up anymore. I learned that lesson the last time."

"You told me you believed me! Him moving on to someone else was just shitty ass timing!" Olive threw her hands and crossed her arms and legs. She gasped and held onto my arm with both her hands. "Didn't you say that you and Garrett were going to dress up as the devil and an angel for the party?"

"Yeah?"

"Isabella, we are going to make you the most beautiful angel on Earth. We're going to make sure that Garrett drools and Kayden leaves the party jealous."

I rolled my head back. That meant that she was going to force me to sit down for hours while she treated me like her own human barbie doll.

"At least you know what you're gonna be! What the hell could I go as?"

"You can go as a cheerleader."

Olive slowly turned her head to shoot daggers at me with her eyes. "I am a cheerleader."

"Exactly! You don't even need to buy a costume!"

She groaned as she dramatically rolled her head back.