After the show was over, still dazed from what happened with JayyVon, I stumbled towards the bathroom, my legs about to snap in half, my head feeling like it was about to burst, and my ribs hurting like hell and fresh purple and blue blemishes all over. But I felt amazing. It was all just the most brilliant thing I have ever witnessed in my life, even though I only remember a few things about it. Especially....Jayy.

When I made it to the restroom, I went into the first open stall I saw and sat right down on the toilet to pull off my heels and rub my feet since they were about to practically fall off. As I did this, I glanced at the watch I always wore on my right wrist, along with all my BOTDF and Hello Kitty bracelets. 9:35...Okay, I have 5 minutes to build up the courage to go see whatever JayyVon wants with me. I am NOT drinking though. No matter what.....I am not smoking, either...

Eventually I got up and walked out into the cold night air, a slight breeze whipping my messy hair sprayed hair across my neck, making me shudder slightly. I really wish I had brought a jacket with me...It IS Minnesota, after all.

After a few minutes of running around trying to find where they kept the tour buses while getting strange looks from people because I was literally running like a crazy person, I finally found it. It was hidden about a block away, behind some trees in a building's parking lot. Luckily no one else had found it yet, so it would just be Jayy and I. If he even remembered I was coming.

I approached the door cautiously, trying to look through the small window beside it to see if anyone was inside. There were a few lights on from what I could tell, and I could hear someone rustling inside. It must be Jayy. Who else could it be?

I knocked on the door 3 times in a friendly sounding way - if that even makes sense? - and waited a few seconds before the person inside opened it.

"How may I help you?" I heard a female voice speak before I could see who it was. She had black hair, shaved on one side - like, completely - with leopard print tattooed on her head, which I imagine must have hurt like hell, and red-ish eye contacts in. She was very short and light on her feet, with a tiny waist - a lot like me, I realized - and I stared at her for a few seconds before recognizing her. Sally Stitches! Of course! Blood On The Dance Floor's merch girl! 

"Oh, um," I spoke nervously. This isn't exactly how I imagined meeting her, while looking for JayyVon. I've always wanted to, because she's just plain awesome and a total sweetheart. "I was actually wondering where JayyVon was? I'm meeting him here..."

"Sorry sweetie, he's not here at the moment. He said he's off at the bar near the buidling across from us," she pointed to a red blinking sign that said "Red's Tavern".

"Alright! Thank you so much Sally!" I smiled, although a bit disappointed. He'd better not be drunk off his feet when I get there....

At that, I sprinted across the street, looking both ways since it was so dark outside, over to the bar he was supposedly at. 

I opened the door to the bar and immediately smelled alcohol all over the place. I stepped inside innocently, looking around for wherever a skinny, very tall, gay, attractive, sassy boy may be at. I couldn't find him anywhere, so I went up to the counter and asked the bartender if he may have seen him. He replied with "Um, yes, I have. He's upstairs. But, how old are you? You don't look 21..."

That's when i started to panic. I didn't need to get driven home by the police just because I went into a bar when I'm only 15.  "Well...I'm 15...But I'm just looking for this...boy. I'm not trying to get a drink or anything. Just tell me where he is and I'll leave."

"Miss," He said, "I already said, he's upstairs." He started to get impatient, tapping a pen i hadn't noticed was in his hand on the wooden counter, making an annoying tick! tick! tick! sound. 

"Well could you go up and get him for me or something? That's all I'm trying to ask..." I tried to remain calm myself. My nerves were getting to me. It was getting late and I don't want JayyVon leaving without telling me what he wanted.

"Okay okay, just a second!" He snapped, disappearing up a staircase in the back of the bar.

I twiddled around with my thumbs to pass time, bouncing up and down on my toes anxiously. I'm about to meet my idol. One who specifically wanted me to meet him after the concert. And he mentioned booze. But I don't look 21! You heard that bartender.....But maybe they're trained to seek out youngsters who have fake ID's....Hell, what do I know? My mind just couldn't shut up, and it was driving me nuts!

Finally, JayyVon appeared from the bottom of the staircase, the bartender following close behind him. I saw Jayy's eyes light up as soon as he saw me, smiling his sweet, perfect smile that's his own. "Hey, hunnie! You came! I was wondering where you were..." As he approached me, he hugged me from the side, pulling me close. I could tell he smelled of some sort of sweet alcohol; nothing like a cologne. I hugged him back tightly around the waist, wishing this moment would last forever. He pulled away first, and as soon as he did, I looked up at him with a big smirk on my face, not being able to say a word. His eyes looked a bit glazed over though, like he was buzzed on whatever he had been drinking a fair amount of the alcohol.

"What is it, hun?" His smile grew wider, his teeth impossibly white and his dimples showing in his cheeks. Seeing this made my face turn hot, and my palms all sweaty.

"Well....I don't know, exactly..." My voice came out a lot quieter than I had anticipated, almost like a mouse's. "I just....Love you. A lot. And I was wondering why you wanted to see me after the concert? If you remember, you talked to me during the show...I was at the front. You said you wanted to meet me 10 minutes after the show at your trailer. I went there, but only came across Sally...She lead me here, saying you were here....And here you are..." I was obviously blabbing now, but I couldn't stop myself for some reason.

"Oh...I'm sorry, dear. I remember asking to meet you, but I couldn't think of where I had said, so I just headed over here, thinking you would come here to grab a drink after or something...." I could tell he was sincere about this, and I believed him.

"Well," I laughed softly, "I'm not 21, first of all. I almost got caught coming here by the bartender who went and got you from upstairs. Do I really look like I'm 21?"

He blushed this time, "Yeah, you do, actually. Not that I looked or anything...Haha...."

"Oh, well, that's not too good, I guess?" I joked lightly, punching him in the arm softly like a good friend might do.

"Yeah, I guess...." His voice suddenly strayed awkwardly in the air, causing a weird silence between us. He had been the one to break the ice. "So, would you wanna hang at the bus for a while, since it's forbidden that you go upstairs?" When he said "forbidden" he sneered over nastily at the bartender, who ended up rolling his eyes in his direction and returning to a drink he'd been making for a young woman that looked around 25.

JayyVon took my hand in his and started walking to the door to head outside. I held his hand close to my body, and as we walked I could tell he was having a bit of trouble. Oh, Jayy...Have bit too much to drink, huh? I laughed to myself.

Eventually we made it across the street and into the tour bus. Sally was gone off somewhere, probably back to the venue merching some more. When I made my way inside, I immediatly spotted a black leather couch near the window and plopped down on it tiredly. I noticed my mouth was very dry and pasty, so I asked Jayy for a glass of water or something.

"Sure thing, sweets!" He went off into the kitchen and fumbled with something in his refrigerator, pouring clear liquid into a blue glass. "Mind if it's strawberry flavored?"

"Naw, anything is good!" Luckily, strawberry is my favorite flavor. Who would've known?

He came back with the drink, handing it to me and sitting down on a red couch opposite of me, his own drink in his hand. "So how's in hangin, little lady?" He took small sips out of his blue glass, swallowing whatever was inside rather harshly.

I looked down at the contents in my glass. Clear liquid. Looked like water. But it was flavored? Must be out of a bottle or something. Like a Propel or something. I took a sip, and boy, was it strawberry alright! It was one of the best things I've ever tasted! But why? Its only water with flavoring...

As I continued sipping, Jayy and I talked about life and how fucked up it can be. I found myself wanting even more of the drink, soon ending up with a bone-dry cup in the middle of a conversation. I set it down awkwardly in my lap, and suddenly noticed my vision was a bit blurry, and my head was starting to spin. My thoughts were jumbled up and my speach was a bit slurred, but I thought that was just because of my nerves. I started to actually get nervous, clamping onto the glass cup with everything in me because I felt as if I were on a tilt-a-whirl. Everything around me was spinning, except for JayyVon's face.

He noticed this, still buzzed from drinking at the bar. But when I managed to look into his eyes, they looked even more glazed over, and he looked like he was off in some other place, other than here, in Minnesota, in their tour bus, with one of his biggest fans just a few feet away of him. I don't mind that he was drunk; just so he wouldn't vomit all over me, I'd be fine.

He started to get giggly, like he does when he gets high, and hearing his laugh made me start laughing for some reason, too. I mean, his laugh is always contagious, but it was even more contagious than usual.

While we were having the laughing fit out of nowhere, he suddenly stopped and started to stare into my eyes. This made me stop in response as well, and I choked out, "Why....why are you staring at me? Hahahaa...." My head felt like it was blown up with helium, my voice a million miles away, vision still blurry. Whatever he had put in my drink, it was like heaven. 

"You're just so....pretty..." He whispered, getting up out of his seat, shuffling over to my couch and half-falling onto my lap. This made me start giggling again, and I helped him onto the couch.

"Boy, you gotta get your shit straight...Since when....since when am I pretty? And....aren't you like....gay, or something?"

"Girl, please....Where did you possibly hear that? I love my boobies....And girlies..." He smirked drunkily, reaching over and squeezing me in the breast and leaning his face close to mine, licking my nose. I couldn't help gasp with shock and amazement and what else? I don't know. All I knew is that I suddenly wanted to rip his clothes off and fuck him right then and there. I looked up at him, biting my lip softly, his sweet, lovely breath that smelled so much of alcohol brushing against my nostrils, making them flare. I parted my lips and it took everything in me to restrain myself from kissing him. He could tell I was having difficulty, so he moved a little closer, brushing his lips against mine ever so softly; it felt as if butterflies were flapping their tiny, fragile wings against my skin, and I finally gave in.

When I kissed him back, I felt so alive and real and beautiful because JayyVon Monroe wanted ME. I kissed him gently at first - I've never kissed anyone before, like, ACTUALLY kissed anyone, so I had no idea what I was doing. But whatever that drink he'd given me made me simply not care - but his lips kept pressing fiercer and more passionately against my own, and soon I was straddling him on the couch, my fingers tangled in his hair, letting myself slip away in the moment. He moaned against my lips softly, and I bite his lower lip hard, which made him whimper in pleasure, moving his hands underneath my tanktops to unhook my bra; and I let him.

I dragged my hands down his back, kissing him roughly, making my way to the hem of his leather pants he was wearing, and pulled them down slightly. He got the cue, helping me take them off over his legs, along with his black combat boots.

I've never felt so alive in my life. His slender hands made their way down my body, tearing off my own leather pants and I kicked off my heels. He slipped off his shirt, and me my own, until we were completely naked on his tour bus couch. In. The. Tour. Bus.

As I lay on top of him completely naked, not thinking about anything that I was doing, I started kissing down his neck, when I felt....it....poke me in the inside of my thigh. I smirked, reaching down and I put it inside me. I didn't care about anthing at that moment. All I knew was I was kissing JayyVon Monroe all over the place. And I was losing my virginity to him. That's all that really mattered.

I don't know how long it lasted. It felt like an eternity - but in a good way. A really really REALLY good way. I wanted it to last forever, but I knew that wasn't possible. That was the best night of my life, by far. 

Little did I know, that it would bite me in the ass later.

What the fuck have I done?

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What Station 4 looks like (: ---------->