imsebastianstan: i've tried drafting this caption so many times and i can never really get it right, but here goes: you know those people who come into your life and break everything apart and put it back together in ways you couldn't ever imagine? that's june. five years ago i left a comment on her instagram: 'need a hand?'. it changed my life. well, no. it was june that changed my life. nothing has ever been the same, and i'm grateful for it every day since.

a week ago, she took me to lizzie's roof, got down on one knee, and said 'i need a hand'. i gave her my hand. then she pulled out a ring and asked me to marry her. i said yes. the ring is made out of a piece of seaglass she kept from one of our dates down in santa monica, because it reminded her of the ocean and me and how much she loved both endlessly. she never ceases to amaze me or surprise me and i am hopelessly and irrevocably in love with her. i can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you, june harmon.
tagged: juneharmon
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chubby dumpling changed chunk stuffers to wedding plannners!

tommy h
wow i just busted such a fat nut

prune
tom sweetie that's not appropriate

robert frowney jr
gross

hemsworthy
can you nut

hemsworthy
get it

hemsworthy
like can you not

ruffalo wild wings
chris give up

ruffalo wild wings
we're never going to think you're cool

hemsworthy
but i learned to play the oboe and memorized every orchid variety

robert frowney jr
that's so dope chris

hemsworthy
really??

robert frowney jr
if your targeted audience is in a nursing home yeah

tommy h
can we focus on what's important here

tommy h
jeb is getting MARRIED

tommy h
i can't believe you're talking about orchid varieties

hemsworthy
well there are over 30,000 species

tommy h
CHRIS

hemsworthy
right

hemsworthy
love

hemsworthy
marriage

hemworthy
not the dendrobium anosmum

ruffalo wild wings
anus mom yourself

scar jo
i cant believe we really get to plan jeb's wedding

scar jo
i'm weepy

lizzie
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

lizzie
pt 2

chad danforth
i've genuinely waited for this moment so long

crisp evans
if i don't get to be the flower girl i'm going to throw a fit

crisp evans
because i'm great at throwing things

crisp evans
like petals

chubby dumpling
chris you're going to be my best man

crisp evans
did i not hint heavily enough

mack the knife
oh chris is the best man

mack the knife
that's cool

mack the knife
mack the knife?

mack the knife
more like back the knife

mack the knife
because you just stabbed me in the back

chubby dumpling
cool it mackie you're also the best man

mack the knife
HAHAHAHA

mack the knife
choke on that suckers

chubby dumpling
june let me have two because she's the best

prune
i knew it would make you happy

chubby dumpling
you make me happy

lizzie
i love love

mack the knife
i'll give up my position as best man to make this stop

scar jo
let their love thrive mackie

tommy h
what about me

tommy h
i don't get to be a best man??

chubby dumpling
HAHAHAHAHA

mack the knife
hahahAHAHAHAHA

chad danforth
lmao

lizzie
good one

prune
oh buddy

chubby dumpling
we have a special job for you tom

tommy h
oh good!

chubby dumpling
you get to collect souvenirs of our wedding after the event is over

tommy h
wait what

prune
you're on garbage duty

tommy h

tommy h

tommy h

prune
poor kid

prune
let's tell him

prune
i can't stand to see my son in pain

chubby dumpling
ugh

chubby dumpling
fine

chubby dumpling
you get to be a groomsman

tommy h
WHAT

tommy h
YES

tommy h

tommy h
THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE MY PARENTS AND MY LIFE SO MUCH ILL NEVER TAKE ANYTHING ELSE FOR GRANTED WOW

scar jo
what about us?

prune
you guys are going to be my bridesmaids obviously

lizzie

scar jo
heck yeah

scar jo
who's choking on it now mackie

tic tac
that's what she said

hemsworthy
nice one rudd

hemsworthy
fist me bro

ruffalo wild wings
what

hemsworthy
like when you pound your fists together

hemsworthy
sorry is that not what you say

hemsworthy
pound me bro

robert frowney jr
do any of you hear yourselves when you talk

lizzie
shut up all of you

lizzie
there are more important things at play here

lizzie
i get to be a bridesmaid

lizzie
this is the best day of my whole life

crisp evans
you told me the best day of your life was when you held your baby niece in your arms

lizzie
i said what i said

scar jo
what about mel?

crisp evans
yeah she's been shockingly absent from this conversation

prune
she was supposed to be the maid of honor

lizzie
was??

prune
i'm still trying to convince her

prune
i didn't tell her i was going to propose

robert frowney jr
uh oh

prune
two days ago she released a live ferret in my car

chad danforth
i knew it

crisp evans
no you didn't

chad danforth
yes i did i literally wrote it in the list of potentially dangerous things i thought mel was capable of doing to prove to my insurance agent she's a threat to my emotional and physical well being

crisp evans
he just showed me the list

crisp evans
he's not lying

robert frowney jr
where did she get a live ferret in urban california

robert frowney jr
aren't they illegal

melon
someone in animal control owed me a favor

tommy h
she lives

melon
i survive out of spite alone

prune
mel it's been two weeks of torture

prune
i just wanted it to be a surprise

prune
please forgive me and let's plan this wedding

melon
why should i forgive you and not release the badger i have in my room

ruffalo wild wings
holy shit

chad danforth
can we all agree i was right about mel

prune
because i love you

chubby dumpling
and i love june

prune
and we're getting married and we want you there

tommy h
and i want you there too

melon
don't start tom

melon
the badger is angry and i know where to find you

tommy h
okay i'm gone

prune
you're my best friend

chubby dumpling
and you're like the orphaned child i accidentally adopted who terrifies me

prune
we really want you there

melon
okay

melon
i'll come

prune
you'll be my maid of honor?

prune
just like that?

melon
yes

prune
thank you mel i love you

chubby dumpling
wait that's it

melon
yes

melon
it's not that hard to convince me

melon is typing...

melon
but also the badger is loose and i have to go

AUTHOR'S NOTE: this fic gets more and more unrealistic with every chapter. also people keep messaging me asking if theory is over and the answer is definitely not. the contest is just for fun i still have a good 10 chapters in me