▬▬ conundrum: lost in the dramaturgy

THE THINE HIGHNESS WAS STILL FAST ASLEEP. You were facing the other way while lying on your sides, whilst Nanami had resting his chin on your shoulder and his arm was winding on your waist. He only had the intention to hold your hand, yet you flinched in response—in which he didn't expect. He thought that he woke you up, but you unconsciously held his hand back, looked for the gaps between his fingers, and intertwined it with yours. He sucked in a breath, his pulse missing a beat, inspecting if you were awake . . . Judging from the steady rhythms of your breathings, you were not.

He sighed quietly, brushing his thumb on yours.

He woke up earlier than you this time. He could've gotten off the bed, but he decided to stay; it was a chance to hold someone close to him and let his life slow down for a minute.

Looking at his digital clock on the side table, it said that it was 4:57 AM—an hour left before the sun would rise. He should get up right now, because he'd like to go for a run . . . But he liked the heat your body was enshrouding against him. Nanami took an inhale, his nose on the side of your neck. He could smell his scent on you—through his clothes and bathing products—but your natural feminine scent overpowered the stilted smell of the products . . . And he just wanted to stay there and have you invade all of his senses like a drug.

Unexpectedly, there was a tightness and tingle flamed on his lower area.

Fuck.

He only groaned mentally when he sensed the growing hardness between his legs.

It was a part of the male biology, especially during the morning after waking up, but having you in his bed was like having his cock teased without relief. He could jerk off, but it didn't feel right. And he didn't want to feel like a fucking creep, relieving himself in a thought of you while being asleep . . . Nanami shook his head apologetically. It wasn't right, he only felt horrible of himself just thinking about it.

Sighing, he decided to stand up and parted his body from you.

He was careful not to wake you up, but you were just a light sleeper.

You stirred, moaning incoherently.

"Nanami . . ?" you groggily uttered, eyes were half open.

"Hey," he responded with a humming and growling manner. "Sorry if I woke you up." He watched your morning face while brushing your hair gently.

"Where are you going . . ?" Your full consciousness wasn't up yet, but you reached for the hand that was brushing you hair and squeezed it weakly.

"I'm just going out for a run, Your Highness." Nanami moved his head and pressed his lips on your temples. "I'll be back in an hour or so; I want you to sleep more."

You grinned sleepily, "Mmkay . . .", then going back to the dreamland again as if nothing happened.

Hearing you responding to him, he gave you another peck on your forehead. And another one. Good thing your sleep was deep and it didn't wake you up again.

He stood up after, walking towards his walk-in closet, and picked a running attire. His sleep that day wasn't complete (like the usual), thus running was good for him to awaken his body. Also, he needed a distraction from you.

The blonde only washed his face and brushed his teeth before changing his clothes. He'd take a shower after his run.

He went out, stretched his limbs out for a bit, then walked for another kilometer as a warm up before going to his run. His usual route was from the condominium building to the Akasaka Palace, to the Imperial Palace, then return to his unit somewhere in Roppongi. He could keep his pace at his highest speed without a break. His lung capacity was a lot outstanding comparing to other mortals; of course, he was a sorcerer. Ever since he was a student in the Jujutsu High, he always set off for a high-pace run, and that was how he built his endurance.

At least fifteen kilometers of running at top speed, he was finally reached the park near the condominium building. Nanami wiped his sweats away on his forehead with a towel as he jerked his shoulders up and down, and exhaled heavily. He was walking with huge strides as a cool down as he took the path back where he started.

As soon as he was back inside his unit, it was twenty minutes past six o'clock. He gracefully removed his sweaty shirt once stepping in the foyer and placed his shoes back to the shoe cabinet.

When he walked inside his room, he still found you sleeping while hugging one of his pillows. He let you sleep, filtering his closet next to find something to wear, then went straight to the bathroom and hopped in to the shower.

Once he was done, dressed comfortably in another twenty minutes, you were still sleeping. You must be tired, and from all the psychoactive compounds you consumed last night, your body was recovering from it.

Nanami watched you sleep for a mean time, before he decided to cook something for breakfast. Gently ruffling your hair, he stood up from the bed and exited the room.

Now, he was standing in front of his double-door fridge, thinking what would you and him have for the first meal of today. He still had pickled cucumbers and seasoned spinach from last night, having them as side dishes must be good. He couldn't decide what to make for the main dish, though he was opting to have something comforting and nourishing. Kento had assumed that you'd be waking up feeling like crap; from all your vices, yes. Or, you could at least heal yourself. But, nevertheless, a breakfast is a breakfast.

Traditionally, white rice should always be served, but he ought to have bread for that specific morning.

French onion soup, it is.

Nanami had cooked a lot of beef dishes before, (especially if he was lucky to come home early and prepare something for himself alone), thus he saved beef scraps and made a stock out of them. Also last night, he ordered roast beef for dinner in a fancy restaurant and had some leftovers.

He prepared the ingredients needed; cut them thinly; sauteéd them; added the shredded roast beef, beef stock, a good amount of dry sherry, and other spices; and had simmered it for half an hour in low heat.

Meanwhile, he preheated the oven's broiler, and while the soup was being simmered, he readied the ingredients for the cupcake-sized fondant chocolate.

He made the ganache by melting dark chocolates with fresh cream, have all of the dry ingredients incorporated together taking out two cupcake liners and poured the batter on it, the ganache in the middle, and topping it again with the batter.

The oven was already preheated, put the sweets in it and have them baked in 180 degrees Celsius for eighteen minutes.

Nanami focused his attention back to the onion soup. Preparing two round loaves, he sliced the top of them, gorged the insides, and saved them for later. He took out a ladle and poured the soup inside the bread. Once each bread was almost full, he layered a slice of provolone cheese, some of Swiss cheese, sprinkled some grated Gruyere and Parmesan cheese.

Waiting for the fondant chocolate to be baked—the soup on wait—he began brewing coffee, thinking that you might need a cup of it. He could have some as well, but he preferred a green smoothie now. Nanami seriously liked to take care of his health: going to morning runs, hitting the gym at least three times a week, and eating healthy foods. It was his lifestyle, he would feel incomplete if he missed a single routine.

A little while later, he heard a ting from the oven.

Finally, the sweets were done baking.

He placed the bread bowls on a metal sheet and broiled them. He just needed the cheese to bubble and brown slightly—for at least 2 to 3 minutes—not to overbaked them.

Nanami needed to wake you up next; breakfast was almost ready—he only needed to plate, in which was a quick thing to do.

He sat down on the edge and leaned towards you. He marveled at you first. Your eyes closed, breathing deep and slow, as your beautiful, lush hair was sprawling on his pillows. Even in sleep, you still looked so beautiful—so ethereal with your long, dark lashes resting against your cheek.

Your character was a welter of contradictions as well. You carried yourself with grace and poise, but when you speak, you were as though reading the lines, but never a follower of the scriptures. You were not also following the rules, although you made sure that those mortals would follow you.

You had always been a deadly combination, a hybrid of angelic features and chiseled features of cynicism and deceitfulness. You, a woman, whose height was only around his shoulders and frame of a delicate deity, was enough to make a man lose his sanity, like a siren who lured and seduced humanity into a fatalistic downfall with the irresistible promise of beauty.

Ergo, him . . . Nanami Kento.

He, shot with guilt, shook his head in dismay . . . And yet, even though still, he was firm to the words he told you last time: you were the sin he was willing to commit—always, over and over, and again.

Kento cupped your cheek, softly caressing it with his warm palms. "Your Highness," he called, now squeezing your cheek gently, "wake up."

There was no response.

"Your Highness," he spoke again.

This time, you bestirred, whining hums confusions and irritation.

She doesn't like interrupted with her sleep, huh?

Nevertheless, Nanami was insistent.

"Your Highness," he said his endearment to you in a clear and calm manner, warm and gracious at the half part of it.

His smooth and mellifluous voice resonated to your ears, and thus, you slowly opened your eyes.

Then, it happened on one autumnal morning, you were struck by his likeness.

You were drinking last night, got drugged, returned to Tokyo, and had him as your fellowship to accompany you throughout the night. Now, as you opened your eyes, the first view you had to envision was him: Nanami Kento.

He was sitting conscientiously beside you next to the large window. His regular profile, its outlines clear-cut with the brilliance of a Victorian portrait, floated against the background of the clear and bright blueness of the distant sky. The sunlight had woven with heavenly glows together to make his hair to shine.

There was nothing of spite, neither desire in the kindness which had impelled him to welcome you in his house. He had acted almost without consciousness of what he did, might be as a natural gesture of sympathy for another person, and now he was staring at you, in an atmosphere of stillness exactly like a painting.

"Good morning, sleepyhead."

You heard him greeting you, with a slight pinch on your nose, and it woke you up from your daze.

"Good morning," you replied with a stealth coquetry on your voice. You extended your hand and stroke his cheek. "You're beautiful."

Nanami snorted softly, "Spare the flattery."

"But you are," you insisted as you stretched out your limbs and torso like a waking cat.

"Whatever you say." He gently knocked your head with his knuckles. "Get up now, I prepared breakfast for us."

Your eyes glittered when you heard him. "I'm up~!" Then you abruptly sprang up straight like a robotic doll.

Nanami looked at you bafflingly, his head tilted to one side. "I assume that you're feeling fine now that you're too energetic."

"Yeah, I just healed myself," you said enthusiastically. You felt the headache coming through as if a sledgehammer hit you in the frontal lobe a minute after waking up. If there was a kind of pain you hated the most, it should be migraine. "See? See?" You showed your knuckles to him, telling Nanami that your bruises were all gone.

"Good for you."

You grinned sideways. "Lemme fix myself first, ne?"

He blinked at first, his eyes were still glued on you. "Yeah, sure." Your bedhair looked cute, though. "I'll wait for you at the breakfast table."

After that, Nanami began to walk as he disappeared outside of the master bedroom. You stood up next and fixed his bed neatly. You washed you face after, then brushed your teeth, and wiped your face.

Upon exiting the bedroom, you were greeted by an appetizing and soulful scent that was loitering around the air.

"Looks delish," you commented as you settled beside Nanami.

"French onion soup," he casually said, picking up his spoon.

You didn't eat anything yesterday and your mouth immediately watered at the scent of it.

Along with Nanami, clasping both hands, you two muttered, "Itadakimasu."

Without putting much thought, you started digging in.

Nanami was quick to notice.

"Careful! It's—"

"Aw, aw, aw!" you cried. "Haa—! Hot, hot, hot!"

"Hot." Nanami only deadpanned.

Tears were prickling your eyes as the hot soup burned your tongue. You breathed out in exaggeration while fanning your mouth as if to sooth the pain.

Nanami only sighed. He did try to warm you, though. Putting his spoon down, he lifted his two hands to cup your chin, twisting your head carefully so that you were to meet his eyes.

You stiffened when Nanami loomed close to your face. With your mouth still open, he started blowing the food inside, easing the frustrating pain torturing you.

Nanami was seemed oblivious with his actions, but when the scene struck him, he got stupefied as well.

He managed to get a hold of himself; a wall of consciousness had come flooding over him.

You might be aware the whole time, but it had just registered on Nanami's mind that he was almost kissing you.

He feigned innocence, clearing his throat. "Careful." He sounded reprimanding as he faced in front. "No one's taking your food away from you."

"Soriiii," you replied childishly, now chewing the food mindfully.

You actually commended yourself at that moment. His lips were literally an inch away from yours! And if your mouth wasn't full that time, you would claim his lips and kiss him. Open-mouthed.

You mentally squeezed your cheeks and scolded yourself.

Shut up, me, shut up.

You and Nanami continued eating. That time, you had learned your lesson and now cooling the food. Nanami's cooking brought a serene sense of comfort to you and started your day so well. You were happily scooping the food, then blew it gently before putting it into your mouth. The flavors burst on your tongue like mini fireworks, in which, to your heart's content, you hummed jovially while you swayed your body side to side—it was to indicate how good the food was.

Whilst Nanami, he was stealing sideway glances at you. He was feeling equally jovial for seeing you enjoying his food. And he couldn't help it; there was a resurfacing smile etching on his lips.

There was a lightheartedness that morning, as if for a moment, he was absorbed by a feeling of connection and it played in his subtle smile and soft gaze.

He couldn't remember the last time he had cooked for someone, let alone ate breakfast with someone. More than a year, perhaps. It wasn't that he wasn't good at keeping friends or relationship, but due to his work, it was natural to lose anyone. Or everyone. He could manage being alone, but he only became more of a ghost than anything else . . . Having you stirred something new for him, as if it was the first time again.

When Nanami noticed that you were almost done with your food, he quickly remembered that he also baked something for you. Standing to reach his fridge, he took out the two desserts and a spoon, then brought them to you.

"Whoah, did you bake them?" you asked, awestruck while fixing your eyes on the fondant chocolate topped with some strawberries.

Nanami modestly nodded his head as he went back to his seat.

"For me?" You were incredibly touched by his thoughtful gesture.

"Yes, for you," he affirmed.

Not just that he made you breakfast, but he baked you desserts as well.

"Aren't you spoiling me, NanaKen?" You smiled like a kid.

Realization dawned him. It seemed that everything he was doing, he wasn't being conscientious when it came to you.

"Who knows?" he coolly replied. "Maybe."

He didn't confirm, but he didn't answer either.

"Well, still, thank you." You made a cut to the center of the mini cake and the chocolate just oozed out sumptuously.

You took a bite.

Perfect!

The way it was baked was perfect.

The outside of the cake was crispy and the center was melt-in-your-mouth delicious.

"You should be a chef or a baker or a patisserie instead of being a sorcerer, Nanami Kento-san," you commented while hearing the angels' hallelujahs at the back of your head.

He chuckled ruefully, "I really am in the wrong line of work, don't you think?"

You'd heard Nanami's reason for staying in the world of exorcism and learned to appreciate his genuine intention in being a sorcerer.

"I won't say it's wrong–" you cut another piece from the cake– "it's just, in the outside world, there's more freedom." Then you ate the piece.

Nanami couldn't agree for more. There were positions out there that more comfortable and less dangerous. He couldn't exactly remember why he accepted the offer when he got recruited to study in Jujutsu Tokyo Tech; perhaps, once upon a time, he dreamed of becoming a hero in an epic, adventure story. It was fun at first, trying to prove his capabilities to anyone, until people started dying within his grasps, and he had witnessed the worst things about humans.

"It never ends," he admitted. It doesn't end.

"That, too," you mused, sounding ecstatic. "Humanity is ought to be doomed because of their negligence—self-sabotage." Secreting negative energies without knowing. "The sorcerers are the reason why they can still attain freedom, but we deprived our own chances for freedom—such mockery."

Nanami couldn't name at least five good things about sorcery, not even sure if he chose the right decision in becoming a sorcerer . . . Well, at least, the pay was good. All he wanted to do was to save money and retire early. It was also a thankless job, although some acknowledged his job and he had received thanks fair enough, and it steered his choices to stay, because he knew that he was doing the right thing.

You found Nanami in a deep reverie. It slightly frustrated yourself for your unrestrained pessimism.

"But," you continued after a short pause, wanting to restore light atmosphere, "once an eye got unveiled from this cyclic existence, it will never be closed again."

He'd seen the futility of living, whirling directionless through an infinite space, through an empty fall; thus, it was his reason to continue the path of futility.

"You're right." He gave you his half-moon smile, either grimly or appreciative.

You think you'd killed the tête-à-tête, so you made another small piece from the cake.

"Nanamin," you called.

You anticipated it, as soon as he panned his head towards you, you already pressed the tip of the spoon on his lips.

Nanami was caught by the surprise, and mindlessly, he put the spoon inside his mouth and slid it off as he had the dessert on his tongue.

"Sweet, ain't it?"

He lightly shook his head. "It is."

"You can have the other one."

"It's okay; they're all yours."

You knew by now that he wasn't fond of sweets. You couldn't finish two in one sitting, though.

"Will save the other one later, ne?"

"Of course," he simply replied.

The two of you finished eating after a while, then did the dishes next. You presented to wash them, buy Nanami was a lot more insistent. It appeared that he was taking washing dishes seriously—soaping them nicely—whilst you were rinsing them squeaky clean.

After that, you and Nanami stayed at the balcony just to feel the air outside. You were having coffee, while green tea for him. He was reading the morning papers, and you were just selling and buying markets online (just to be productive).

It was ten in the morning when Nanami told you that he'd like to go to the market to buy ingredients for lunch. He asked you if you wanted to go with him.

At the back of your mind, you considered it a date, so you said yes!

"By wearing that?" He was skeptical while looking at you.

"Is there something wrong?"

"No–" he shook his head right away– "there's nothing wrong."

If there was something wrong, it would be the eyes of the scums. You were blessed in the chest department, and even though the sweatshirt he lent you had a thick fabric, the fullness of them were still obvious and your perky buds were getting embossed.

Nanami was fine seeing you just the way you are, but he couldn't say the same thing about others. Wordlessly, he made a quick run to his wardrobe and got you a cotton jacket.

You immediately understood what he meant and laughed at him. It amused you how he couldn't vocalize that you weren't wearing a bra, so he made an action instead. Your unit was just next door, but you didn't want to go.

Soon, you and him left.

There was market near the condo building, and you two walked to get there. Nanami also more preferred fresh ingredients (especially if using meat) than buying them in advance and freeze them.

Gyūdon and vegetable gyōza for lunch.

He was picking the ingredients while you were pushing the cart

After buying what they needed, once returning to Nanami's pad, they started working. They worked efficiently, starting with the gyoza. Nanami was doing the gyoza wrappers, creating each piece from scratch. Apparently, he didn't like the store-bought ones.

While you, you were cutting the vegetables and spices nicely and thinly. Firm tofu; two types of cabbage: a green one for taste and a purple one for color; two type of mushroom; shītake mushrooms for their deep and earthy flavor and king oyster mushrooms for texture; carrots for sweet fresh taste and color contrast; onion for another depth of sweet flavor; and the combination of seasonings for taste.

Gyūdon would be easy to make. Just steam some white rice and sauteé the beef with spices and seasonings, then done.

Lunch was fulfilling, but cleaning and washing was quite mendokuse.

Yet you were doing it with Nanami, so things were smooth.

That afternoon, it was an idyllic one. Attempting to watch a mystery movie, but it turned out that at the first thirty minutes of the movie, you two already figured out the twist. Having nothing to watch, the TV was decided to be off.

Nanami was resting on the couches in the living area, while he let you wandered in his unit by yourself. It appeared that Nanami had lived here long enough—you could tell at the intricate and contemporary designs of the interiors. It had colors with a neutral palette of light oak, white, and black. The concrete floors were visually softened with rich walnut wood and plush mustard furniture, while the space was elevated with gold calcatta marble. It was adorned with gold accents, wood tones, and soft and plush furniture in hues of beige and oats, and the linen were layered in to create a serene and cozy that felt like you didn't want to go outside.

Compared to your new unit, yours was colorless and bland. Gojo left it for you like that, in an idea of you could design it that suited your taste.

Later on, you led yourself in his study room. It had the same palette, floor to ceiling windows with a telescope next to it, shelves installed on two sides of the walls.

On the desk, you saw painting materials.

He can paint?

Your pondering was answered when you saw an art piece quietly sitting on the table.

Out of your excitement, you picked it up!

"NanaKen!" you called, not even reaching the exit of the study room.

Nanami sat down on the couch and saw you running towards him.

You lifted the piece of paper to the level of his face.

Ah, right. He was working on that piece last night, but it slipped off of his mind.

"Amaranths," Nanami filled in.

"I know!" You sat down beside him. "Did you paint them?"

"Yeah, I took a photo of it when I was in a mission, and I decided to draw them out of whims." He went back to lying down. "But it's not done yet." He even saw some small mistakes on it.

"But still, it's very pretty," you complimented.

"Not really," he replied reservedly, though he appreciated your words.

It became so natural now, and you laid down beside him while holding the art piece up.

Nanami quickly made more space for you as he moved backwards. He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you close until your bodies were pressed together. He even placed your head on his shoulder and chest area to make you feel more comfortable, then kissing the side of your head in the process.

"Thou art immortal and dost never fadeth, but bloomest for ever in thy renewed youth," you said in a silvery tone, enunciating each word with elegance.

"Hm?" He was taken aback when he heard you reciting.

"It's a prose written for the amaranth flowers," you explained. "Amaranthus are associated with longevity, death, and immortality due to their flowers being slow to wilt—one that does not wither, the never-fading."

"I see. They are flowers about you, then." Nanami was just playing your hair with his fingers as he listened to you.

You lightly chuckled, "I guess so."

Beauty that was for eternity—it is you.

"I reckon you're also knowledgeable about flowers?"

"In whatever plants, I'd say," you replied in a pleasant voice. "I was a priestess before, remember?"

"Right, I remember." He slightly frowned shortly. "You carried those knowledge after all these years?"

"Oh, not really, some went instinct, y'see." You'd forgotten most of them. "But I did study plants long after I was a priestess."

"Uh-huh, figures," he replied, laced with humming chuckles. He should have expected that.

"And after studying 'em, I decided to live in a forest alone." Your life had been defined by isolation, self-reliance, and a deep affinity with the natural world. "I continued the practice, still. And when I discovered new species, I would draw them and write my observations for it, then send them to laboratories and publishing companies to gain some income."

He was silent, but his revel for you was setting in. It wasn't the first time that he acknowledged his adoration for you, admiring you in a way that there was no something wrong about you.

"Do you have a pseudonym for your works?" If course, he was interested to read your books-even if it was just a boring book about plants.

You shifted your body, now lying on your sides to face him.

"I think, it's 'Laong Laan'," you said to him.

"You think?" he mused.

"Uh-huh, I have lots of name," you chuckled.

"Of course". His features softened. "Laong . . ?"

"Laong Laan," you repeated. "It's in Filipino, meaning 'bound in certainty for a long time'."

Ah, really.

He softly snorted, then breathing out low hums of cackles. "It's so you," he commented, sweeping your loosened hair behind.

What a befitting name for you.

"Yeah, it is."

There were some moments in your life when you could define yourself. What you had become was merely a false, self-created aesthetic concept of you who you are. Yes, like living aesthetically in another being, like sculpting a new version of your life with different materials. Very experimental and external, and you could barely recognize yourself.

You had thought passed through your mind as you fixed your focus on Nanami. You were the one who was watching him falling asleep now. You liked how his golden locks embellishing his face, like a new day light to hearth-glow golds. His presence was like a stardust, having a substance that was agave sweet and raw purity of one's soul. You found it in him—the kind of purity that you could no longer find in yourself.

He became your safe place, your comfort person. You carefully snuggled against him as happy as a cat in the afternoon glows, ready to meet the stars in your dreams.

Breathing slowly, steady heartbeats, relaxed body, and thinking almost nothing.

You had falled asleep after some time, surprisingly faster than usual.

And when you woke up, the glare of the afternoon sun streamed through the cracks of the blinds and was poured into your face.

You instantly burrowed your face to something warm and quite hard. You rubbed your nose on it, planting little kisses even. And when you were fully awake, you massaged your eyes to shake all the remainders of sleep from your head.

It felt like a blessing when the first person your eyes had seen was Nanami.

You grinned demurely when he staring at you. It seemed like he woke up at the same time as you.

Upon glancing at the wall clock just behind, you remembered something . . .

"Wah! I almost forgot!" you exclaimed, jolting like a jack-in-the-box, and you sat upright.

"What's it?" he questioned calmly and pushed himself up to sit.

"I'll swap duties with Shoko later." You almost grumbled, dropping your feet on the floor. "She must have been on a 24-hour duty everyday since last week."

"Right, she's been," Nanami confirmed. "What time?"

"At seven." It was half passed three o'clock in the afternoon, just enough time to prepare for your duty. "I have to go, ne," you said to him, somewhat crestfallen. Of course, going back to reality.

"Mm-hm." He nodded.

Both of you stood up. Nanami didn't react much as he watched you collect your stuff. You only had your clothes from last night, as well as the blanket the cruise management gave you.

You walked slowly towards the front door, while Nanami was behind you to escort you outside.

When you were about to step down to the foyer, you looked back.

"I'll see you again?"

"You'll be."

You smiled with pleasure. As a matter of fact, there was nothing compelling to the words he conveyed—given that his unit was next to yours and you were going to the same workplace as his—but his words offered an affirmation.

"Okay, then."

You were about to out, but Nanami reaches for your hand and gently pulled you back, and you could feel the length of his body against yours. His swift action took you by surprise, and you swayed you body sideways, head turning back to him.

"What . . ?"

"Say," he started, his voice gentle, "how about I pick you up at five?"

You felt like your whole face lit up. "Why?"

"I just think–" he nuzzled the side of your cheek– "that a dinner sounds nice."

You chuckled; you'd just asked if you were going to see him again, and it manifested already.

"Yes, let's do that," you responded.

Letting out quaint laughs, you hopscotched towards the exit. He ventured a silent smile as his head was tilted to signal you a goodbye.

You mirrored his gesture and finally closed the door. Immediately moving to your unit, you mentally organized the things needed to be done in an hour and a half.

You also wondered if your energy was changing. You had been with a few people in a span of a thousand years, but unlike with Nanami, you couldn't bury the emotions even deeper inside of you. You two would kiss, go to (self-proclaimed) dates, play house, and be intimate as if it was the most normal thing to do.

Maybe, meeting Nanami had helped you to understand yourself better.

And you couldn't deny it.

When you finished pampering yourself, even packing up your things, you decided to leave your unit.

It was 5 PM sharp when you exited the front door.

As soon as you panned your gaze at your right, Nanami was already there waiting for you.

He was leaning his back on the wall, looking at his wristwatch.

"How long you've been there?" you questioned, slightly wary that he'd been waiting for too long.

"Just a few seconds earlier than you," he mused politely, then standing up straight.

You got amused to the fact that you and him were almost wearing the same outfit. Black, fitted turtleneck sweater, black trousers, black leather shoes, and mildly dark brown long trench coat for his style; whilst for you, it was the same as his, but you opted for cream and light palettes.

You smiled at him, your expressive orbs twinkling.

He's beautiful, looking so casually elegant.

"Let's go?" you prompted before you became at loss for words.

He only nodded, a hint of mirth flashing on his thin lips.

"A luggage?" He noticed you bringing one as you two walked on the hallways.

"Yeah." You prepared one, just in case. "Who knows where would I be sent after my night shift at the infirmary."

"Right, make sense." He presented to take it for you, you could have said no, but he insisted on it. "Is there a place you want to go?" he asked while pushing the luggage.

You started think. You weren't craving for anything on that moment, but a specific food got lit up on your mind.

Since it was weekends . . .

"Seafood would be nice."

Nanami seemed to like the idea as well, and he knew a nice place to introduce.

"Seafood it is," he said.

He was close to you the entire time when riding the elevator down to the basement parking. Nanami also presented to drive for you both tonight. And who were you to decline? You liked being with him, getting drowned of his presence and appearance.

Nanami fished his car keys on his coat, unlocked it, and went before to open the door of the passenger seat for you.

You smiled demurely, headed for the door, and climbed inside. He gently closed it next, opening backseat, and put your luggage inside. He clambered in seconds after, started the engine, and reversed out of his space in the parking lot.

The drive to the seafood restaurant was short, and before you knew it, they arrived.

He pulled out on the parking lot as he drove with a suave confidence.

They walked slowly into the fancy restaurant and got seated somewhere in the center part of the dining area. He looked at the menu and you found yourself staring at him. It seemed like he caught your stares, and before he could look at you, you had already dropped your gaze on the menu.

When you were done choosing, as if on cue, without calling, the waiter had already come to assist you.

"Grilled prawns with Szechuan calamari, fennel, and radish," you said to the waiter and he took note of it.

"That's all?" Nanami was quite concerned that you only ordered one dish.

And you only nodded cluelessly. You saw the slight tart of frown on his eyebrows, then he gave his attention to the waiter.

"I'll get the luxurious seafood platter," Nanami dictated politely.

"Good choices," the waiter said with a smile as he scribbled their order.

While waiting for the food to be served, you two were just talking about the most random things. You mostly did the talking, because you never ran out of stories to tell him. He wasn't wearing his sorcery thing eyewear that time, but his pair of reading glasses. His reading specs made him looked younger, more vibrant. It emphasized more of his sophisticated and classic visage.

You and Nanami waited for at least half an hour before the serving of the food. The luxurious seafood platter really lived up to its name. It was composed of six dishes: steamed mussels in a white wine broth, fritto misto with aioli, grilled sardines, stuffed squids, and red snapper ceviche and scallop Coquilles Saint Jacques.

"Wow." You were absolutely in awe. "You're a certified foodie, Nanami Kento-san, you can't lie to me."

He grinned sideways, very reserved, very charming, as if he was fighting a smile.

"We can share." He offered.

"I'd love to."

He ordered the platter to a sole reason for you to eat more. During the whole dinner, you were stealing glances at him from beneath your lashes as he ate. He would savor the food very carefully, as if he was trying to guess the ingredients used or how it was cooked, then he would unknowingly comment about if to give you a trivia or two. You didn't know if the the two of you could finish the food that was served, but you could have the leftovers packed if ever.

You just were going along with him, also nerding about the science-y stuff about food.

And you could watch and listen to him all day; his deep-set of emerald eyes had brightened since eating and he looked genuinely gleeful.

All this talk and connection reminded you that you still had a duty to make. You peeked at your watch.

"I better go."

Nanami was seemingly taken aback as well. "Right, we should."

Nanami composed himself, you as well. You were definitely stuffed, and Nanami insisted you to bring the food, and you couldn't say no.

You two were now outside of the establishment. You were just wondering silently how you would go to the Tokyo Jujutsu Tech, because you didn't want to bother Nanami any longer, but he already solved your musings once he proposed:

"I'll drive you there."

You secretly bit your lower lip. "You don't have to, you know . . ."

"But I want to."

You grinned, both gratefully and and sheepishly.
"This feels like I'm taking advantage of your kindness, Nanami Kento-san," you said while tucking the strands of your hair behind your ear.

"You're not." He touched your wrist gently, wrapping his fingers around it.

With the assurance in his voice, you welcomed his offer with an open mind and soul.

You and Kento walked back to the parking lot. He opened the door for you again, like a gentleman he always had been. Soon, he was inside his car again. Driving to Tokyo Jujutsu Tech would take an hour top, and Nanami had to drive fast enough for you not to come late.

You never had the chance to have a conversation with Nanami, and you oddly liked it that way, only the light and soft jazz pieces were playing inside the car. Afraid if a single word was drawn out, it might ruin that kind of atmosphere that the two of you only knew.

Sometimes, silence was the language of comfort and companionship.

The pieces were too nostalgic, listening to them could make you lost in memory lane—nightdreaming about everything and nothing.

He really looked great in his his usual calm, collected self. As for you, you were deliberately thinking about how your life was being steered away from your reasons. Yes, from your silly reasons. Yet your reasons were being fed to the blackhole hidden inside your soul, whittling everything down up to the atomic level.

Nanami was just driving smoothly, while you didn't realize that you fell asleep the whole ride and slowly waking up as he parked the car.

"We're here." Nanami laid his hand on top of yours and gently squeezed it to fully wake you up.

"Yeah." You coaxed a thankful smile.

You held his hand back, as if you didn't want to let it go or want to leave right on that moment.

As you unbuckled your seatbelt, you reached out to him and claimed his lips to yours.

Yes, you kissed him out of impulse.

You were not planning to prolong the kiss, so you pulled away slowly. Opening your eyes, yours and Nanami's gazes met. You played with your fingers to soothe the embarrassment in you.

"T-That's . . ." You coolly fidgeted. "That's a thank-you kiss."

He only smirked, sultry hums of amusement reverberated on his throat. Nanami was the one who leaned closer to you now, then he brushed the strands of hair on your face. That moment, he gave you a quick kiss to your lips. "You-are-welcome-" he met your lips with his again- "kiss."

You smiled against his mouth, realizing Nanami could also be playful at times.

As you two faced each other, you could feel his eyelashes flittering on your skin. And without another word, he lifted your chin to meet his lips to yours again. It wasn't like the first time, but it still felt perfect like the first time itself.

Your brain leaped high upon, he, kissing you with an equal passion. There were rings in your ears as though the whole world fell silent and you could only think of him. And the fact that your heart kept pounding hard against your chest, it meant that you liked it. Very. All you knew that your life had been rotting away (yet still continuously living), but right on that moment, he had brought another one hundred years to your lifespan.

You and Nanami were sharing a kiss as if it was perfectly normal—well, at least, you could pretend it was. Your mind was mulling over to that fact. You were aware that your time with him together was limited, no strings should attach . . . There shouldn't be a meaning to everything . . . And there was a painful sting had gripped your chest . . . Because you could never have him, nor he could have you.

But, just like he told you before, you were the sin he was willing to commit. Thus, you would do the same. You wanted him. All of him. And nothing and no one would deprive you otherwise.

You were just feeling his chest rising and falling with every breath, deeper than your shallow ones. His actions were seemed fluid, and he softly cut the kiss as he somehow felt either the satisfaction, guilt, or something else in you.

"You should go inside," he whispered as he caressed your cheek.

You only nodded, but you stayed close to him just to savor the last minutes with him before you go.

Nanami had been so incredibly kind to you. That entire dramaturgy was spiraling to a dangerous end, and who knew what would happen.

And oh God . . . You could only cry with your whole heart and soul. How you wished—oh, how you prayed—that you could give him more . . . Much more, so much more, the best you could offer, because he deserved more . . . More than life, more than the every living matter in the universe.

im finally fucking done 💀
i procrastinated finishing this
lol bc i found myself playing
love and deepspace lmfaoo
i need to feel, that's why XD

anywayyyyy!!! i hope y'all
enjoyed this 7k monster of
blabbers 💀 and the fact i
condensed the whole freakin
domestic bliss in a single chapter
i love it tbH. let's enjoy fluff
for now. consider them bonus
chapters lol before i proceed
to the hard parts

the next chapter would be easy
to write, ig (if i didnt decide to
procrastinate XDDD) i have so
much thing to do at the same
tho, and idk how to shits all
at once without burning out or
feeling guilty for not doing
anything or nothing 💀

also, after writing the french
onion soup part (lol), a trivia
randomly appeared in front
of my eyes XDD saying that
french onion soup is traditionally
served after the wedding feast
(the morning after) when everyone
was still drunk and tired XD
it's just a perfect timing lol
and i smiled to the universe
bc the universe and my thoughts
are always interconnected
and yes, you and nanami are
married, your honors uwu

- HANDTHE;REND ♡