14

apricate

(to bask in the sun)

8th July, 2019

THE rusted metal clips held the hangers, clad with freshly washed clothes, on the stretched rope. Ye Bin continued to pick up more items from the bucket, in an attempt to let her limited supply of clothing receive a good amount of the afternoon sunlight.

It was an oddly quiet surrounding she was standing in, for a weekday. The entire boundary of the house had no other sign of human beings present within it. Usually, the din caused by the bakery's customers or atleast Ju Ho's rapid movements at his floor caught her attention. To an extent, she had become used to it.

It looked so deserted and calm that Ye Bin was feeling uneasy. The bakery was closed for the day and it had been so, since quite sometime.

A couple of days ago, Ju Ho had left her an ambiguous text that informed her about his plan to visit his friend at Seoul. He had not been able to return since then.

Ye Bin had often found herself thinking about him since the day they had gone out. It was highly inexplicable to her. She had tried to reason it with just a mere concern about her friend's whereabouts. Had it not been his generosity and advices, she would have been saddled with a huge debt.

The sound of the front gate opening and approaching footsteps, made her walk towards the front side of the house.

"I'm sorry if you're here to visit the bakery. It's closed right now." she explained in a high pitched voice as her sandals made a squeaky noise, its sole trampling the growing wild grasses underneath.

"The owner's here! You don't need to shoo away people for me, now." Ju Ho stopped her from speaking as he waved at her, enthusiastically. He was in the process of closing the house's gate.

It was obviously Han Ju Ho with that same gaily face and a smile so beautiful lingering on it. He seemed neatly dressed, his hair brushed in a particular pattern and his wrist adorning a metal watch. Ye Bin could only stare and not speak a word. She was not expecting him.

"I haven't seen you for a while." Ju Ho spoke after greeting her. "Sorry about putting you through this ordeal. I had to visit my friend at Seoul. It was urgent. He had undergone surgery recently and had no one to take care of him. I hope that I didn't put in a tight spot after I let you know about the sudden change in my plans."

"It's completely fine." Ye Bin assured as she started walking towards the backyard to complete her task. "It's high time that I try to arrange meals for myself."

"You don't really have to, you know." Ju Ho followed her. "I can still bring you meals everyday. You should focus more on your painting. I get to see you everyday thanks to that. It's so rare to come across you, otherwise."

"Why would you want to see me everyday?" Ye Bin flushed, stammering. She turned back to look at him, briefly.

"Just because." he laughed casually. "Why would I need a reason to see you?"

Ye Bin had no idea why that silly sentence affected her so much. She took a moist skirt from the bucket and squeezed out the water from it with all her force.

He said it so lightly. He meant nothing. He wanted nothing.

It was so clear to her that she wanted to deny the entire idea just to delude herself. Ye Bin knew that she was going to think about this later and it had probably escaped his mind already.

"You really don't have to worry. I can support myself now. You should tell me how much I owe you now." she shifted her attention to putting the clothes on the rope again.

"You can just forget about it. Think of it as a gift from a friend. Why think about something so trivial?"

"It's not trivial to me, Ju Ho. We can't do that. I will make sure that it doesn't happen. I'll end up feeling guilty throughout my entire life."

"Yoo Ye Bin, why do you tend to be so serious about this? It was barely some weeks. I would have done the same if you were my family." Ju Ho puckered his lips, his hands stuffed in the pockets of his pants.

"Why would I be treated like your family? I am not and I don't want to be." Ye Bin could feel her heart drop as the words left her mouth.

She was being transparent infront of the wrong person. Ye Bin had no idea what made her squeeze such a reaction out of her.

"I didn't mean to offend you." Ju Ho looked totally surprised. "Take it slow, goodness. I'll definitely give you the bill within this month."

"By this month. Remember." Ye Bin threatened with one of her steel hangers, the attention of her mind still lingering around the blunder she had almost created.

"Or cross that. Pay me with one of your artworks. I would love to have one of those in my bakery. You might even earn customers thanks to that." Ju Ho suggested, his eyes gleaming with enthusiasm.

Ye Bin's mind was seized by a sense of rising admiration. The man infront of her looked so different from the human beings she had been familiar with all her life. He had never really showed her any sign of a sense of entitlement. It baffled her tremendously to think that someone like him could be real. He was too good to be true.

Though Ye Bin had been spending more freely as compared to the past, she's running out of money again. It was a good thing that she had decided to take a temporary break from her part-time jobs but she might need to return soon. Everything was looking bleak to her again. Considering the market price of everything, cooked food of so many weeks would be enough to rip her pockets entirely. 

"That's not a bad idea. However, do send me the bill. I need to make sure that it's good enough. Do you have anything specific in mind?" surrendered Ye Bin with a defeated sigh. She was not really willing to argue with him. He always seemed to have back-ups and refute her. She had no position to actually go for paying in a monetary way in reality.

"Even if you draw a line, that will be enough." drawled Ju Ho.

"I thought that you hate modern art."

"I do. Extremely, to be very exact." he nodded his head aggressively. "However, I like your art-style. Especially the vibrant flowers you draw in the background. I loved the one you had posted this week."

"Do you keep a track of each?" Ye Bin found herself smiling.

"I do, obviously. I was especially smitten by that monochrome girl standing infront of a garden full of blooming roses. It looked philosophical to me."

"Do you want to take that?" Ye Bin raised an eyebrow.

"Can I?" Ju Ho stared at her expectantly.

"I mean, it's not like I would be selling it to someone else. If you take it, I would be able to see it whenever I want to."

"You're so unpredictable at times." Ye Bin found herself smiling too.

"How's your progress right now? Are you able to do it properly? Or do you think you would require a different deadline?"

"It's just so-so. I keep thinking that I am doing it all wrong. I am yet to even complete the sketch. It's been three to four days already. I have barely three more weeks in my hand. I'm afraid that I would be left unsatisfied at the end. I just want to make sure that I do my best. Show my best work as if my life depends on it."

"Do you want me to help?"

"Help? Are you going to paint instead of me?"

"No. I'm not that talented, miss. I'm just hoping to provide you with proper inspiration."

"How do you plan to do that?

"Draw me like one of your French boys, mademoiselle." he joked, stretching his hands as if he was asking her to hold him.

Ye Bin let out an audible laugh. "You're so random at times."

"Jokes aside, I am thinking about going to Mount Sanbang to get some much needed break. I have been cooped up in a house, tending to my friend all these days. Since he's recently been released, he needed my help. I couldn't refuse. I will have to collect my dog from a friend's house in the evening. I don't want to go out again after freshening up."

"Dog? I didn't know that you have one." Ye Bin was genuinely surprised. "When did you get it?"

"I do. It's my mistake. I should have had fixed an appointment with you to meet him. I'll definitely do in the future. Even my regulars know about Marble. How did this slip out of my mind?"

"Maybe because both of us were occupied with our own worries. Anyway, I would love to get know your dog."

"I'm going to the canola field right now. Do you need a change of clothes? I would love to have you around me today. We should catch up there."

Ye Bin checked out her outfit with a raised eyebrow. It looked decent enough. She was hoping to get some grocery shopping done later and her appearance looked decent thanks to that.

"It seems alright to me. I can go out like this."

"I'll be back in a jiffy, then." Ju Ho promised as he rushed towards the door of his bakery.

Ye Bin stared longingly at the door while arranging her bucket and the remaining clothes during that time.

"Let's go." Ju Ho was out with an odd looking stand-fan.

"What are you going to do with that?"

"It will be hot there because it's afternoon. We will need it." Ju Ho spoke, the lie totally ready on the tip of his tongue while he put the key to the lock of his bicycle, standing in the shed.

"Wouldn't it be humid? The sun is totally up in the sky." she stared at the sky briefly and removed her eyes because the sun was too bright and hot.

"It would lessen a bit by the time we reach there. Almost negligible."

"Then why would you carry that?"

"Do you want to go or not?" Ju Ho was crossing his hands across his chest, looking upset. Ye Bin decided to drop the topic and get on the back-seat of his cycle.

"Hold tight or you might land on the road badly." he added as a soft warning.

His cycle practically stormed out of the house, its wheels already rotating on the road before Ye Bin could process it entirely. She held his waist carefully, making sure to not drop from the seat.

"Am I going too fast?" Ju Ho asked, still paddling.

"Maybe slow down a bit. It's been a while since I have been on a cycle."

Ju Ho immediately dropped his speed. Ye Bin gave him an affirmation as she finally found peace in the journey, staring at the blurry trees and flowers in full bloom.

The canola flower field was luckily not too crowded, only a couple of foreigners taking pictures in the middle of the field. Ju Ho had managed to park his cycle at a safe spot and go to Ye Bin who was standing under the shade of the tree he had previously taken shelter under, during the soap opera shoot.

Ju Ho placed the fan at the exact same place and started fixing it the required procedure accordingly. He put on the batteries carefully.

"Are we planning to have a picnic here?" Ye Bin asked as she watched him switch it on.

"No. We're lying down on the grass today."

A cool air hit Ye Bin's body as the fan's blades started rotating at a high speed. Her locks started moving, the majority of her hair already scattered haphazardly within seconds. She could only twist the entire mass with her hand, using one big strand to work like a rubber band. It came tumbling down instantly and she wanted to shut down the fan completely because of the problem it was creating. She could even feel the taste of her freshly washed hair in her mouth.

Ye Bin found that Ju Ho was already lying on top of a belt of green grasses. Seeing that she was not doing the same, Ju Ho patted the place near him, causing her to follow as well after a minor episode of hesitation.

It was better than standing, definitely. Now that she was lying on the ground with her back on the bed of grasses, her hair was no longer troubling her.

The soft chirping of the birds and the moving heads of the yellow flowers made her heart swell in amazement. She could not see why she had previously not asked Ju Ho about the existence of local places like that. It turned out to be such an unexpectedly pleasant afternoon.

"Ju Ho?" Ye Bin called after a few moments of total silence, remembering a certain fact. She earned a soft hum from him as a response.

"I was thinking to ask you about something."

"Go on. I'm listening." he shifted side-wards to face her.

"Well, the sinks of my floor aren't in their best behaviours lately. Also, the wallpaper of my bedroom is kind of coming off. The paint is chipped too, at some places. Do you think that it's because of the damp weather?"

"They're about to give up on their lives." Ju Ho sighed. "Mr. Hwang never looks out for the basic amenities. Don't expect him to intervene. I have faced this too when I was new here. You might need to get new ones. Also, about the paint, the damp affects the walls a lot here, at Jeju."

"Another big bill. Why can't I just live in peace for one week atleast?" she groaned, covering her face in agony.

Ju Ho noticed how upset she looked. Considering that she was just one step nearer to a stable life, it was understandable. The damp affected walks could result into huge damages. There would be a constant risk of a damaged roof next and Ye Bin was directly under it. It would totally rip her wallet to get everything fixed.

"Do you know another fact about Jeju Islands?" Ju Ho broke the silence.

Ye Bin rolled over to meet his eyes before answering negatively to his question.

"It has a dork called Han Ju Ho and he always has trendy dance moves in his pocket."

Ju Ho looked so serious for a split second that it almost made her want to laugh. It was one of his quirks to occassionally act silly like that.

He was standing to his full height the next second. He did a twirl and made some amateur stunts alongwith abrupt movements with his hands. Ye Bin couldn't control her urge to laugh.

He dropped his body onto the soft bed of the green grasses again. Ye Bin was too absorbed in laughing to notice that this time, his body was closer to hers.

"What was that?" Ye Bin barely managed to say, still laughing hysterically.

"Look, I made you laugh." he tilted his head, his lips curling into a satisfactory grin. Ju Ho, infact was amused himself that he pulled such a silly act infront of her. The embarassment slowly trickled in as he gazed at her.

Atleast, she was laughing because of that.

"Why do you try to put on a smile on my face everytime I'm upset?"

"Because I don't like seeing people being sad. It makes me feel upset somehow." Ju Ho looked at her, her lips curving into a  grin. 

It was a gaity smile that looked like a mirage. A daydream that seemed to draw her in. He looked like a brightly painted landscape whose every stroke made her want to feel vivacious too. This rush of emotions looked like a jargon she had been previously familiar with.

"You're unnecessarily silly." Ye Bin commented, closing her eyes to adjust better to the sunrays, seeping through the spaces of the tree's leaves.

It took a few seconds for Ye Bin to realise that the sunrays were not boiling her face for the moment. She opened her eyes to check the reason.

Ju Ho was holding his hand right on the top of her face to prevent it from being burnt by the strong rays.

"What are you doing?"

"Protecting you from the bright sunlight. You were squinting your eyes. Don't worry. You will get used to the sun after sometime." Ju Ho explained as he kept his hand as it was.

"It's alright. I have my sunscreen on." She lied through her teeth, earning a nod from Ju Ho who withdrew her hand and kept it on the surface of the grass again.

As she closed her eyes again, she could see the remnants of her last glance of him, a concoction of a bed of soft grasses, the refreshing breeze, a mass of tousled lavender hair, his warm gaze and that smile.

There was something lying in that exalted persona that made her want to tear down her subdued nature. Just wanting to take a few more steps and try to learn how he was so happy everyday.

She knew that whatever she was feeling at the moment was going to become a big slit on her vulnerable heart. When she gave it some thought, it appeared to her that Han Ju Ho was some kind of a saviour to her. It was not uncommon to feel that way towards someone like him. He had been there for her through thick and thin.

A soft sigh escaped her lips as she lied beside him, the edge of one of his spread hands, brushing against her skin. She could feel how her body was tensed up and the warm sunlight wasn't helping her in any way. The restlessness in her body was slowly building up, a yearn to hold him close was burning her from inside.

Ye Bin wanted to scream. Scream at herself for walking on the wrong path again. She was not naive enough to be oblivious about what was developing in her heart.

A growing affection could be so fatal when she was just beginning to hold onto herself. However, here she was. Feeling something for a person she shouldn't, yet again.

Ye Bin could almost visualise herself, living inside a painting in motion. It was a landscape, full of saturated shades of yellow and green with a monochromatic and a polychromatic person blending in. Maybe, the monochromatic figure was asking the artist to let the polycromatic one reach out and hold its hand. One colour wasn't enough to be an active part of the different hued world, afterall. 

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