Although music is my life and you can almost always catch me with my headphones shoved in my ears, I am about as tone-deaf as a person can get. Asher learned this as I belted out the lyrics to the songs playing on the radio as he drove me home.

At one red light, he passed me a strange look. "Never have I ever seen you in such a good mood," he stated.

I scoffed. "Don't seem so surprised," I muttered, taking a break during the verse of a song I didn't know too well. "Music brings out the best in me."

He rolled his cerulean blue eyes. "Debatable."

"Rude!" I exclaimed, glaring at him.

Asher chuckled, laying on the gas as the light turned green. "Kidding," he said.

I don't think he was kidding.

Three more songs played before we were pulling into the driveway of my house. For once, my dad's rusty old Toyota was sitting in its place. I couldn't remember the last time I came home to see him already there.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and opened the door of Asher's Camaro. "Thanks for the ride," I said as I hopped out of the car, "and for taking care of me last night."

He smiled softly. "Of course. I'll see you Monday, alright?"

I nodded, waving. "Bye, Asher." 

I walked up my driveway and opened up the front door to my house, which was unlocked. As I stepped inside, I peeked over my shoulder to see Asher's car still parked, the driver looking up at me. I grinned and waved one last time. He smiled before driving off.

Stepping into my house, I shut the door behind me. After kicking off my shoes, I looked up to see my father sitting at the table, the newspaper in his hands and a cup of coffee in front of him. His attention was on one thing only, though, and that was me.

I bit my lip and walked over to the table. "Hey," I greeted hesitantly.

Dad set down the newspaper and clasped his hands. "Where were you?"

I quickly thought back to what Olivia had texted me. During the car ride, I had read her messages, which explained that she had covered for me by saying I was sleeping over at one of her friends' house after the game.

"I slept over at Jenny's house," I told him.

Dad frowned. "Why didn't you tell me ahead of time?"

I sighed. "It was a spur of the moment thing and my phone died," I lied, playing with my hands behind my back.

He sipped his coffee. My eyes darted around the room. I'd never lied to my family about anything concerning myself other than saying I was okay when I really wasn't. I didn't want to be caught on my first attempt saving myself from a grounding or something similar.

"Alright," he said. "Please tell me next time."

I quickly nodded. "Yes, I will. I'm really sorry for making you worry."

He sighed. "I'm your father, it's my job to worry."

"I'm still sorry," I said.

"It's okay." 

He opened up his newspaper again and I took that as my opportunity to leave. I walked out of the kitchen, passed the living room, and down the hallway. 

Just as I was about to open up my door, the one across from mine swung open, revealing my sister. Her brown hair was tied up in a messy bun, her face was bare, and she was wearing a pair of sweats and a massive tee-shirt, probably stolen from one of her boy toys. 

Natural Olivia was my favorite Olivia. It reminded me of when we were young and had no problems. When I didn't have to work to put a smile on my face.

A mischievous grin stretched over my sister's lips as she crossed her arms. "You have some explaining to do," she announced in a matter-of-fact tone.

I groaned, trudging into her room and collapsing on her bed. She shut the door before joining me. I laid on my back while she sat criss-cross at my feet.

"You didn't come home last night," Olivia stated.

"Yup," I agreed.

She rolled her brown eyes that matched my own. "Where were you? Were you at Christopher's?"

I blushed and shook my head. "No," I answered, "I was not."

"Just spit it out," she said in a way that would have been scary if her lips weren't turning up at the corner. "I covered for you last night so you owe me. You have to!"

"Fine," I said, giving in to her puppy eyes and blackmailing techniques. "Do you want the whole story or just the answer to your question?"

Her eyes lit up. "Oh, so there's a story? Tell me everything."

I couldn't help but smile as I began to retell all the events of the night that I could recall to my older sister who was acting like a little kid. "So Christopher brought me to Henry's party, right? When we first got there, Chris introduced me to Henry, who was being really gross. He compared me to you and said something about wanting to bed me."

Olivia's face scrunched up. "He was the worst one night stand I've ever had," she muttered.

I rolled my eyes. "Christopher and I went to the living room, away from Henry, and found Asher. Some girl - I think her name was Bree - was hanging off of his arm like a koala, and he looked super uncomfortable, so I asked him to go to the kitchen with me. We had a conversation about our lack of love lives and I'm pretty sure I got tipsy off of the water."

"My little sister's first drinking experience and I missed it," Olivia grumbled, but a smirk was still on her lips.

"Anyway," I continued, "I asked Asher to dance and we went back to the living room. We danced - not like that, Liv - but got separated. I went to find him but ran into Henry, who grabbed me and tried to make out with me and do God knows what else."

Olivia, who was still recreating what she thought Asher and I danced like by throwing her arms in the air and gyrating her hips, froze. "Are you for real?"

I nodded. "I was crying and freaking out, but Asher swooped in and knocked the perve straight on his flat little behind. They fought and everyone was cheering them on, but I hated seeing Asher get hurt. I broke it up and he brought me into his car and took me home.

"I passed out from exhaustion then and don't remember the rest of the night, but Asher says that I woke up once he put me to bed in his guest room. Apparently I refused to sleep alone so he took me to his room and I changed into more comfortable clothes. I woke up insanely confused with a massive headache. Asher told me what happened and made me pancakes and then we watched movies and he took me home."

By the end of my story, Olivia was grinning like a psychopath. "Did you kiss?"

My cheeks flushed an even darker red than they had before. "No, Liv."

She sighed. "Boring," she chimed, "but I'm glad you had a good day. I've been nursing a crazy hangover all day."

"Karma," I teased, lightly shoving her arm.

"Hey, I already counteracted all of my sins of the past twenty-four hours by covering for you last night."

I smiled at her. "Thanks for that, by the way."

She shrugged. "It's cool. You've done it a million times for me, anyway. It was about time I returned the favor."

It was true. Throughout her high school career, Olivia had always been a party animal. She attended every big party and came home in the early hours of the morning more times than I could count, and I'd covered for her even more times. I never really understood why my sister wanted to go out and get drunk, but I would never rat her out for it.

"Either way, I appreciate it," I thanked, standing up and walking towards the door. "I'm going to go take a nap, okay?"

Olivia nodded, smiling a little. "Okay, I love you."

No matter how many times a day I saw my sister, I couldn't remember the last time she had told me she loved me.

I halted in my tracks at the doorframe and glanced over my shoulder. "I - I love you too, Liv."

~~~~~

I never liked wearing dresses. As I looked at my appearance in the bathroom mirror, I couldn't help but scrutinize the way the shapeless black dress hung off my body. It was a little tighter at the torso up until it hit my hips, where it dropped straight to the floor in the back, although it was shorter in the front and only went to my knees. My older sister had applied a bit of makeup to disguise my dark undereye circles and pale skin. My gold necklace was clipped around my neck, the pendant hidden beneath the high neck of my dress.

I looked at the small clock hanging in the bathroom and panicked. My dad told me to be ready to go before nine and it was already quarter before the hour. I rushed out of the bathroom and down the hall to my room. I was never a punctual person, but being late to a funeral was one thing I was not willing to do, especially considering whose funeral it was.

I slipped my feet into the plain black flats I was borrowing from my sister. Since she was only a year older than me, we shared most of our sizes.

After checking myself in the mirror one last time, I left my bedroom and walked down the hallway. By the front door was my father, wearing a crisp black suit, white shirt, black tie, and shiny black shoes. His hair was gelled and his beard was shaven, but his eyes were ringed with dark circles revealing pure exhaustion. When he noticed me, he stood up and pulled me into a hug. I squeezed my eyes shut as I lightly hugged him back. His body shook as he sobbed and I felt a tear slip down my cheek.

The familiar voice of my sister rang through the house. "Ready?" she questioned, her voice cracking.

I rubbed my dad's back before stepping away and scanning my sister's appearance. Her dark brown hair was curled and tied up in a ponytail. She was wearing a knee-length black dress with short black heels. The makeup on her face did a good job at hiding the undereye circles all of us shared, but her eyes were red and bloodshot, just like mine, and her lips were chapped and pink from constant biting.

Dad cleared his throat and nodded. The three of us walked out of the house and climbed into my dad's silver Toyota. Olivia sat in the passenger seat and I took the seat behind her.

I leaned my head against the cool glass of the window and closed my eyes. Nobody talked during the trip. We all had so much on our minds.

The drive to the funeral parlor was fast - too fast. I wasn't ready at all, even though I'd technically had months of forewarning.

Once the car was parked, we all got out and walked towards the building. We walked down a few hallways before finding the main room. Inside, all the chairs were set up and the casket was at the front of the room, still shut.

"There are still a few minutes before others are going to start arriving," my dad informed. "I can go find someone to open up the casket if you two would like a moment alone with her."

I looked up at him blankly, but Olivia nodded. "That'd be nice," she whispered in a faint voice.

He nodded and walked off, leaving just my sister and me.

"You look nice," she told me.

I tried to smile. It didn't work. "Thanks," I murmured. "So do you."

She coughed. "Are you excited to start high school soon?"

I shook my head. "No."

"It's not scary," she assured. "Freshmen year was so easy."

I shrugged. "I'm not scared. I just wish..."

Olivia quickly nodded, understanding what I was going to say but not wanting me to say it.

Our father returned to the room with two middle-aged women dressed in white button-ups and black slacks. The ladies walked over to the casket at the head of the room and unlocked the clasps. Once they swung the lid up, they secured it with a little pole before turning and coming back towards us.

"I'm sorry for your loss," the shorter one said to us before rushing passed.

"You can go first," I croaked to my sister.

She nodded and slowly made her way to the front of the room. Dad and I left the room and found some sort of waiting area. I stayed there with him until Olivia came back, a few tear streaks on her face.

I got up from the uncomfortable bench and walked back towards the main room. My dress swayed along the floor as I wandered down the aisle. Finally, I was standing directly in front of the open casket.

Dressed in a baby blue dress with a bouquet of orchids in her hands, my mother's lifeless corpse laid in the box. On her head was a short, curled, blonde wig that matched the shade of my hair. Her closed eyelids were painted with brown eyeshadow. Her pale skin had been coated with foundation and her lips were covered in pink lipstick.

My mom never wore makeup. She never curled her hair. She never wore dresses.

I noticed that the mortician had left the gold necklace around her neck, but the pendant was hidden under the collar of her dress. My hand drifted up to my neck as I fished my own necklace out from under my dress. I ran my thumb over the engraved L and curled my lips into my mouth.

"Hey, Mom," I whispered, my voice trembling. "I miss you, a lot. I can't believe you're gone. I wish...I wish you were still with us. I wish you could be here for my birthday. You always made me pancakes on my birthday. Dad's rubbish at making food, but he still tries."

I let out a half-hearted smile as tears streamed down my face. "I love you, Mom. Don't you ever forget it."

I turned away from the casket and briskly walked down the aisle and out of the room. The second I looked into the eyes of my dad and sister, my face crumpled. Sobs wracked my body and hot tears flooded my eyes.

Both of my family members hopped up to comfort me, but I didn't want it. I turned away, covering my face with my hands.

"Why?" I screamed. "Why did she have to die?"

My dad tentatively rested a hand on my shoulder but I whirled around so it fell off. "Lindsey - "

"Why? Why, why, why?"