KNIGHT

Batanes, Rakuh a Payaman

Napakaganda ng Batanes, ang mga burol ay malawak na pastulan ng mga hayop, mga kalabaw, at mga kabayo. Nag-aalok ito ng isang perpektong tanawin kung saan ang lupa, dagat, at kalangitan ay para bang malapit sa isa't-isa. Napapikit ako ng aking mata at dinama ang sariwang hangin.

Napakapayapa, tahimik at malaya.

Napangiti ako at napatingin ako sa kulay bughaw na kalangitan. Hindi ko itinuloy ang pagbabagong anyo dahil na din sa mga sinabi sa akin ni Thaddeus. Ilang taon na ba ang nakalipas? Ilang taon na ba akong nagtatago? Habang buhay na ba akong ganito? Pinalitan na din ang aking pangalan sa tulong ni Thaddeus, ako na ngayon si Mason Hunter Cruz.

Pakiramdam ko ay ibang tao na din ako kahit wala namang nagbago sa aking pisikal na anyo. May dala dala akong isang maliit na upuan dahil napagdesisyunan kong dito ipagpatuloy ang aking mga sulat na dapat ay para sa kanya. Mga sulat na gusto kong ibigay sa kanya araw-araw para ipakita kung gaano ko siya kamahal sa sandaling ikasal kami uli ngunit hindi ko na nagawang ibigay sa kanya. Kaya mas mabuti siguro na tapusin ko na ang lahat ng mga sulat na ito dito sa lugar na ito at ipaanod sa karagatan.

Dear Alana,

There are thousands of yesterdays and billions of tomorrows, but there is only one today, and I will not let it pass without expressing my love for you, telling you how I feel about you every day. I love you every day of my life. My love is forever yours. I will treat you like a diamond, rain or shine, and you will never be able to get away from me. Even if you are far away, you will never leave my heart, even for a moment. My love for you will flourish until my dying days because I have a sense of purpose and want to show you affection. While I may not have the most inviting phrases to describe my love for you, I will use the three words 'I love you' to let you know that my world revolves around you all year.

You understand how I feel about you. I want you to understand that there is no mistake in it. My love for you is genuine, and I will love you forever because you are the only one who deserves to be loved so gently.

Dear Alana,

Sometimes I get caught up in life's concerns and worry. I get depressed and alone in my thoughts; I feel like a lost child without a home, but the love you offer me is what keeps me going. All I'll ever need is you. Thank you for being there for me; I love you so much. You mean the world to me. I say this truly. You've shown me that love doesn't cost anything, because I can't understand what I could have done to earn such love. Thank you for sharing a piece of your heart with me; I vow to handle and guide it with my life. Nothing can make me stop loving you.

Dear Alana,

Seeing you smile means a great deal to me. I would never want to see you sad. I would do anything humanly possible to keep your face all blooming with smiles and laughter, because your love is everything to me. It's even more than what I bargained for. I am glad I have got you. I love you so much.

Dear Alana,

There are a thousand ways to say I love you around the world, but only one way to prove it and that is by actions. You have proved that you love me unconditionally repeatedly. You were that one person who was by my side when all the world was against me. I have known ever since that day that you were the one for me. I try to love you and take care of you much and well. I hope you know that I have the best intentions always, so forgive me if I ever hurt you or caused you pain. I love you for now until forever and will never leave your side.

Dear Alana,

Spending time with you is undoubtedly the greatest thing ever. It's the most enjoyable thing I have ever done in my life. When I'm with you, baby, I have the time of my life and time flies by. But when we are apart, I spend every second in agony waiting to see you again. I love you and I miss you so incredibly much, can't wait to see you again!

Dear Alana,

Knowing you are with me makes my life a dream come true. Remembering our first kiss is remembering since when my heart beats for you. When we first hold hands, our souls become one. Seeing you makes me feel like everything is fine. My love, I share all my feelings with you.

Dear Alana,

I remember the first time I saw you. I knew I wanted to be with you from the moment I laid eyes on you. I couldn't stop looking at you, your eyes, your smile–you stole my heart the first moment you spoke. I didn't believe in love at first sight until I met you. And to this day, I can't believe you chose me to be with you. You're everything I want as a partner and you're mine. Don't think for a minute that I don't appreciate everything you do for us. You're everything to me and I love you.

Dear Alana,

I know I can't give you the world, but I can give you my heart, my love, and my affection. I promise to stay true to you and hold on you to for as long as you let me. Though I can't give you the world, I'll do everything I can to make you as happy as you can be by my side. I feel like I'm the king of the world right now because I found my queen.

Dear Alana,

I'm in love with you, and I'm not in the business of denying myself the simple pleasure of saying true things. I'm in love with you, and I know that love is just a shout into the void, and that oblivion is inevitable, and that we're all doomed and that there will come a day when all our labor has been returned to dust, and I know the sun will swallow the only earth we'll ever have, and I am in love with you.

Dear Alana,

I don't need the sun because you are the sun in my life. Your shine brightens up my life. I am very sure of loving you forever.

Napaluha ako nang makita kong nasa huling pahina na pala ako ng papel. Huling sulat ko na pala ito.

Dear Alana,

I hope you are happy right now. Gusto kong maging masaya ka tulad ng kagustuhan at hiling mong sumaya dati pa. Ngayon na malaya ka na sa piling ko gusto kong malaman mong hinding hindi kita malilimutan ngunit sa araw na ito na isinusulat ko ang panghuling papel na meron ako, ngayon mismo ay tuluyan ka ng papakawalan ng aking puso.Tuluyan na akong bibitaw at patuloy na ulit ako sa aking buhay. Alam kong masaya ka na sa piling niya at dahil iyon sa akin, gusto kong ibigay sayo ang lahat pati ang kasiyahan mo even thought that happiness no longer includes me. I don't deserve your love dahil sa napakaraming kasalanang ginawa ko sa iyo. Mga kasalanang hindi matutumbasan ng salitang kapatawaran. Meron pa nga akong kasalanan sa inyong lahat dahil on your wedding day ay naroon ako tinitignan ang iyong paglalakad papunta sa altar, papunta sa kanya. Napakaganda mo nung araw na iyon. Ikaw na yata ang pinakamagandang babae na nakita ko ng ikinasal. Ngunit ang buong akala ko ay kaya ko na, kaya kong makita kang ikasal ngunit nagkamali ako. Sorry dahil hindi ko pinatapos ang kasal niyo sa halip ay nauna ako sa lugar ng inyong reception huwag kang tumawa Alana dahil pati ako ay natatawa. Gusto pa kitang makita kahit saglit man lang dahil hindi na kita makikita sa susunod. Nakita ko ang mga ngiti sa iyong mga labi, kitang kita ko din ang ningning ng iyong mga mata. Masayang masaya ka na nga at masaya din ako para sayo. Bibitawan na kita at magpapatuloy na ulit ako sa buhay ko, mahal ko.

Pagkatapos kong tupiin ang huling sulat ay isa isa kong isinilid ito sa isang malaking bote at tinakpan, old style pero nakakagaan pala ng loob. Para bang puso ko ang ipapaanod ko sa karagatan, sa mga malalakas na mga alon. May dala din akong maliit na tali upang itali ang putol na ilang mga bulaklak ng tanim kong bleeding heart. Itinali ko ito sa katawan ng bote ng maayos. Napangiti ako ng makita kong tapos na ang ginagawa ko at para bang nakahinga ako ng maluwag.

Malakas na hangin ang humawi sa aking buhok. Malapit na ako sa dagat at kitang kita ko ang malakas na alon. Muli akong napatingin sa hawak hawak ko at napangiti. Marahan akong lumuhod sa buhangin na malapit sa alon.

And then let it go.

I let go.

WAKAS