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Percy Does Not Like Himself


Percy handed the taxi driver the pilfered casino card as the three tweens in the backseat buckled their seat belts. The oldest and youngest were confused by strap and buckles (the youngest nearly wrapping his around his neck), but the shaggy haired middle child was quick to aid them; a mixture of confusion and disbelief written on his face as he struggled to understand why the others were having such a hard time with such a simple thing.

"Where to, Mac?" The unshaven, sleep deprived cabbie grunted as he twisted the card around in his hand. Chances were he was unfamiliar with the casino's flower logo, which might have seemed impossible for how long he'd been servicing The Strip.

"Dead Or Alive Recording Studios. Los Angeles, California," Percy replied, trying his best not to laugh at the blushing Italian boy as the other boy leaned over him to assist with his seat belt. "And they need to get there fast."

"Los Angeles, huh?" The cabbie muttered as he spun the card around in his hand. "That's go'n to be pretty pricey."

"I believe you'll find the balance on there is more than enough to get them there," he grinned as he remembered how the card had caused the meter to display an infinity symbol and how the guy's jaw had dropped at the sight. "And whatever's left is your tip."

To anyone that would have been watching, it was plain as day that the guy resisted the urge to roll his eyes. The cabbie probably thinking this was all a big waste of time given their ages, or that his tip might be only a few bucks if they had the funds to cover the trip. "Wow... Thanks..."

"Trust me," Percy grinned as he patted the door with his Celestial Bronze hand; the mortal probably questioning how he lost his arm and where he got such an advanced prosthetic. "Now, while you ring this up, I'm gonna stick my head back there and have a quick chat. Tell them to behave for you and what not."

"Yeah. Sure. Whateva," the man muttered as he swiped the card on the dash's reader.

Percy sidestepped to the next window and stuck his head inside the compartment. His sudden appearance making the only girl emit a startled yelp and attracting the immediate attention of the ten and eleven year olds; the latter's hand reaching into his jacket. "Hey, uh... Percy-"

"What?" His younger self asked, with his hand still ready to draw Riptide at the slightest hint of trouble.

His breath hitched as vivid green eyes peered into his own. It was shocking to see how much hatred, distrust, fear, and pain those young eyes (his eyes) contained before Smelly Gabe became nothing but a nightmare, that his mom would be safely returned from the Underworld, and the love of Annabeth had illuminated his view of the world.

And a guilt far heavier than Ouranos settled in his stomach as he realized that his younger self would never know Annabeth's soothing love.

Or that he'll never get to know her period... Wise Girl, I'm so sorry...

"What?" His younger self repeated, snapping him back to reality. "I don't have time for you to be gaping like a fish out of water."

Percy blinked. Was I really such a brat? He set his jaw and glared at his younger self, but he merely mirrored his actions, making Bianca roll her eyes and the younger Nico snicker. "Whatever," he mumbled as he dropped his glare (which means he thinks he won). "When you get to LA, you need to do the following: Go straight to DoA, do not go into any mattress shops-"

"Why would I go into a mattress shop?" His younger self asked, face twisted in confusion.

"Yeah, why would we go into a mattress shop?" Nico parroted with goofy grin. The young son of Hades no doubt trying to make a good first impression with his younger self by sucking up. Whether it be the start of a crush or just wanting a friend only his Nico would know.

"Just- just don't, okay?" He sighed, rubbing at his temples with his real hand. "Once you enter DoA, go straight to the main desk and tell Charon-"

"Charon?! Like the ferryman?!" the young Nico cried, bouncing in his seat. The high pitch squeal making all who heard it wince.

"Uh... yeah," he continued, as he began to have second thoughts about his plan to make sure his younger self survived his first quest. "Tell him you're there to negotiate a pay raise for him. That'll-"

"Why would anyone believe a little kid could give someone a raise?" Bianca asked.

"I am not a little kid!" The younger Percy protested. Doing an absolute perfect job of convincing everyone he was mature by crossing his arms and puffing out his cheeks.

"Look, Charon's not the sharpest guy in the world. Hades, you're going to find out there are a lot of dumb people out there. Like, a disturbing amount of dumb people. Just- Just try to use that to your advantage," he sighed, as he began to feel the start of a headache coming on. "Charon will then take you to, uh, the floor his boss' office is on." He pointed to the energetic son of Hades. "Nico, you still got that ball, Nic- I mean, Nick gave you?"

"I'm not dumb, you know," Nico grumbled as he held up a red, rubber ball Nick pilfered from The Lotus. "I know that's me..."

"You're talking crazy, little dude," he answered honestly, albeit with a nervous chuckle. "Now, one of you is going to have to-"

"Just like I know you're an older version of him!" The young son of Hades cried, pointing to Percy's younger counterpart.

Bianca narrowed her eyes and examined both green eyed boys. "He does look a lot like you," she agreed.

"You both are crazy," the tween son of Poseidon huffed as Percy's face drained of all color. "No way I'm that ugly..."

"That ug-" He clenched his teeth and suppressed the urge to reach in the cab and throttle his obnoxious younger self. This gives self-loathing a whole new meaning... He massaged his temples and dragged his hand down his face, earning giggles from both di Angelos. "One of you is going to have to use the ball to distract the boss' guard dog, while the other two sneak by."

"That sounds really dangerous," Bianca said. "Why do we have to leave the hotel again? And why do we have to help this stinky kid?"

"I'm not stinky!" Both he and his eleven-year-old self cried out.

"I knew it," Nico gasped. His eyes wide in amazement.

Percy let out a frustrated groan and took yet another deep breath. "You have to leave because he's going to take you to someone really important to you," he said, pointing a Celestial Bronze finger at his younger self. "After that, he'll take you to a super cool summer camp." And drag you into a world of monsters, gods, and danger waiting around every turn.

"But I don't like camping," Bianca whined. "And why doesn't that person send an adult?"

We're wasting way too much time right now. He looked away from the daughter of Hades and became determined not to be lured into another series of time wasting questions. "Anyway, the dog will turn friendly after a few minutes of playing and you'll be able to join up with the others. From there you'll-" images of Grover flying towards the gaping chasm to Tartarus pushed their way to the forefront of his mind "-shit!"

Nico gasped. "You said a bad word!"

"In front of a lady!" Bianca added, turning her nose up in offense.

"I've heard a lot worse," his younger self grumbled.

"Percy, you still got those shoes Luke gave you?" He asked, sticking his head further in the vehicle to check his other self's feet. None of them have fake feet, and none of them could even begin to handle Tartarus at this age!

The younger Percy hung his head low and sadly shook his head. "No... Grover was wearing them. Luke's probably going to be mad I lost them, isn't he?"

Right now Luke just wants you dead, Percy thought as he exhaled in relief. "I wouldn't worry about that. Luke's a pretty cool dude, just, uh, don't ever be alone with him."

"What does that mean?" His younger self asked with Nico parroting the question immediately after.

"Okay, so the boss may seem really intense at first," he continued, earning a glare from both boys. "But once you get to know him a bit, he's a really cool guy." A smile tugged at his lips as memories of Hades doing his best to be the father Nico, Jason, and even he needed when their world was collapsing around them. The god-turned-mortal wasn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but he more than made up for it by just being there. Your sacrifice won't be in vain, Hades. We will set things right.

"The guy's a dick," the young son of Poseidon growled.

A nearby fire hydrant exploded into the air, causing tourists to scream only to immediately pull out their cameras and snap pictures of the hundred feet high torrent of water left in its wake. It was a reckless use of his abilities, but it was the only way he could vent his frustrations that didn't involve dragging his snotty counterpart through the window.

Keep it together. Hades does have mom right now, so you'd be the same way. He doesn't know Hades like you do, he mentally reminded himself as his right eye twitched.

"I don't think Nico should be around people like you," Bianca grimaced. "And a young lady should definitely not be around such sailor talk!"

"Look, Percy," he said through clenched teeth. "You don't know it right now, but you have the greatest assets you could ever need to get what you want."

The younger son of Poseidon looked at Bianca, then to Nico, and then back to him with confusion written on his face. "You mean these two?" He asked, cocking his head like a confused puppy. "How are they going to help get my mom back?"

Because they're Hades' kids! He wanted to yell. I can't have been this dense!

Bianca ceased her offended lady act and looked to the middle demigod. "Your mom's in trouble?"

"We'll help you!" Nico cried with the enthusiasm and conviction only a ten-year-old was capable of. "I'll even distract the dog!"

"I don't know about that, Nico," Bianca tsked. "That sounds like a job for the oldest."

"'Anca!"

Percy smiled at the siblings' eagerness to help his younger self complete his first quest. They weren't Grover and Annabeth, and the future was irreparably altered with their tragic deaths, but he was certain Bianca and Nico would become the pillars of strength his other self would need to overcome Kronos and Gaea. If they were lucky, things might even work out for the better. Bianca might not meet her tragic end and Nico wouldn't be devastated by her loss.

But Annabeth and Grover become nothing but footnotes in their lives...

"Hey, Mac! We're burning gas here! Let's get a move on!" The driver cried, smacking his hand in the dent covered door. The man clearly ready to get the drive over with so he could start his retirement as soon as possible.

"Yeah! Just need another second!" Percy shouted, making Bianca jump at the sudden change of volume. "Er... Sorry," he apologized to the daughter of Hades with a sheepish smile, before turning his attention back to the boys. "Okay, there is one last thing you need to do before you reach LA."

"What's that?" The three tween demigods asked.

"You need to become friends," Percy answered with a smile, though he felt unfathomably corny saying it.

"You are definitely not me," his younger self huffed. "I don't make friends."

"I'll be your friend!" Nico volunteered, shooting his arm up like he was in a classroom and had the answer to a question no one else knew.

"See you got one already," he grinned, grateful that this Nico was just as friendly an energetic as the one he met at Westover Academy so many lifetimes ago. "As for Bianca, I'm sure you'll be friends in no time after you talk to her." Sorry, little me, but that one's a total shot in the dark. I didn't get to interact with my Bianca much.

The younger Percy looked to Bianca and frowned. At that point in his life girls were still considered gross and annoying, which was made all the worse by his primary bullies, Nancy and Clarisse, being girls. "What do we talk about?"

The question gave him pause, as even after several thousand years of life he still sucked at icebreakers. But then he remembered a late night fireside conversation that had clued him and the others that the di Angelos weren't like other demigods.

"Hey, Bianca?" He asked with a devilish grin, as he could already picture the chaos he was about to unleash. "Who's the current president?"

Bianca blinked in surprise at the question. "Franklin Delano Roosevelt?"

And just as he expected, the younger son of Poseidon shifted the entirety of his attention to the daughter of Hades. "No he's not! He died like a hundred years ago!"

"Yes he is!" Nico cried, jumping to his sister's defense. "I heard him on the radio a few nights ago!"

"There's been like ninety presidents since him!"

Percy laughed as the three kids began to bicker among themselves. His presence completely forgotten as Bianca called his counterpart a liar for saying the war ended years ago.

"Alright, that should get you guys through this step of the quest," he chuckled as he retreated from the window. He rapped on the roof of the cab- and cringed when the metal dented from the force of his prosthetic hand. "We're ready to-"

Before he could utter the last word, the driver slammed his foot down on the accelerator, causing the tires to squeal and burning away a troubling amount of tread before launching into the busy traffic of The Strip. A limo slammed on its brakes and swerved to the right to avoid collided with the cab, only to slam shotgun into a stretch Hummer. The jacked-up gas-guzzler was knocked into the next lane, sending a small Saturn flying onto the sidewalk; thankfully not hitting any pedestrians. Traffic lurched to a sudden halt as all outbound lanes were now blocked by long bodies of the limo and Hummer, and the blaring horns of angry drivers drowned out buzzes, whistles, and alarms of Los Vegas.

"Oooo," Percy hissed as the Hummer driver jumped out and began to scream at limo driver. "I hope everyone's-" the limo driver screamed something and pointed in his direction "-okay! Gotta go!"

Though it would have been trivial to handle a couple angry mortals, a joke really with his arm forged from his father's trident, it was better for he and Nico to maintain as low a profile as possible. It wasn't just worrying how the gods would react to knowing there were additional copies of them lurking around, but if a Guardian or Watcher knew of their existence it was game over. Not game over in the sense of them being killed and sent to Elysium to chill, but every reality that had a version of him and Nico would be purged.

Everything and every soul they ever knew damned to nonexistence.

And he really wanted to prevent that from happening. He wanted that just as much as he wanted to permanently lock away the gods of the void and their ruthless minions to prevent them from ever destroying another world.

Percy backed away slowly from the scene of the accident before breaking into a sprint to the entrance to The Lotus Hotel and Casino, in hopes that The Mist would do its thing and alter the mortals' perception. Sure enough, as he reached the smashed in doors, he looked over his shoulder to see that the two drivers were now on the sidewalk engaged in bare-knuckle fistfight while their drunken passengers cheered them on.

"You really need to learn how to control The Mist, Percy," a heartwarming voice chuckled to his left. "Piper and Persephone have, and it makes their lives so much easier."

"I'll get around to it someday," Percy chuckled as he turned to watch his Nico step out of the shadows with his Master Bolt in hand- and a few splatters of drying blood on his hoodie.

"You've been saying that for at least three thousand years," the son of Hades playfully groaned as he leaned against the scorched wall beside him.

"What can I say? I'm a slow learner." He wrapped his fingers through Nico's belt loops and pulled him closer until their foreheads touched, only to immediately cup his chin and tilt his head back to catch his lips in a kiss. It was short and sweet (and gods did he really want to deepen it), but it provided enough warmth to steel him for the unpleasantness to come.

"You definitely mastered that quickly," Nico purred as he wrapped his arms around the son of Poseidon. "We hadn't even graduated high school and you knew how to press my every button."

"I had a great teacher," Percy chuckled as he rested his chin on shorter demigod's head. "And I was an eager student." Though he couldn't see it, he was positive Nico was rolling his eyes at his cheesy comment.

They stayed in each others embrace until the first of the first responders arrived to the scene of the accident. As a short, but ripped cop tried to break up the fighting drivers, Nico pulled slightly away to look Percy in the eye.

"How did it go?" The son of Hades asked, his voice just above a whisper, yet drowning out all the sounds of Sin City.

"I think as well as can be expected?" His eyes darted briefly away from Nico's to see the officer take a right hook to the jaw. "I told me- gods, that sounds weird aloud -the necessary info to make it to your dad's throne room without-" His throat constricted and he forced himself to swallow "-without Annabeth and Grover..." He took a shaky breath and Nico began to rub circles on his back. "And I followed your advice by not telling you and Bianca you're demigods. I think you're right, your dad's going to be suspicious anyway, but if they and me don't know they're demigods, then he may think the Fates are involved."

"And he'll hate that," Nico chuckled. "But he'll feel forced to help you to protect Bianca and me."

"And I'm sure it will be full of threats until he warms up to me and switches to passive aggressive jabs." He huffed in amusement and shook his head. "Unless that version of us starts dating someday."

"Oh, then the threats will never stop," his husband laughed.

They fell back into silence, though it was not a comfortable one. There was one topic that had yet to be covered and could not be ignored. Still, he tried to put it off for as long as possible by watching the escalating fight and counting the beats of Nico's heart to ground himself. How many nights he had clung to that rhythmic beating to drive out the horrors that haunted his dreams was something even the gods were incapable of knowing or even comprehending.

Finally, after the limo driver was dropped to the ground by a cop's taser, Percy closed his eyes and asked, "what did you do with the body?" The already fragile mental dam he had erected burst and the flood of tears it had been holding back surged forth, and if wasn't for Nico holding him he would have collapsed to his knees.

He had seen so much death through the eons as they continued their quest to prevent the Outer Gods and their malignant offspring from awakening. Countless worlds where decaying bodies were piled high with no one to attend to their last rites. The mummified remains of those that had survived the invading calamity, only to waste away on poisoned Earth. Streets turned into ankle deep rivers with the rotting mix of blood, bowel, and the acidic contents of burst stomachs. The remains of cruel experiments composed of the fused flesh of men, women, and children.

And despite every horror that he witnessed, every tortured soul that haunted his idle thoughts, it was the recently discovered twisted remains of an eleven-year-old Annabeth sprawled out on the floor of The Lotusthat would be the one he could never forget.

One he refused to forget.

Her arms and legs bent at unnatural angles with the flesh of every joint bruised and swollen from the broken bones within.

Rib cage ripped open exposing flesh and organs that had been cruelly and expertly eviscerated to prolong her suffering.

Bloodied jaw dislocated and broken yet still stretched wide in an eternal silent scream that exposed her severed tongue.

Her right stormy eye wide with a pleading fear as the hollow, bloodied socket next to it stared into oblivion.

Just lying their in a pool of her own blood while the bewitched guests of the casino merely stepped around her as if she was some puddle.

He couldn't imagine what her final agonizing moments were like, and it was made all the worse by knowing all she had been denied.

Reconciling with her dad and rejoining her family once more.

Finding a second mother and family in his own.

Reuniting with Thalia.

Traveling throughout the country and then Europe.

Knowing love...

Every fountain in Vegas exploded skyward as the first sob escaped his throat. Every muscle in his body went limp and he dragged Nico to the ground.

"I took care of her, Percy," the son of Hades said through his own tears. He knew he wasn't just crying out of empathy, but because Annabeth had been his friend too.

He managed to nod his head as his body shuddered, and clung all the more tighter to his partner.

"I c-cleaned her up the best I could and t-took her to The Big House." Nico stopped and wiped away his tears into sleeve of his black hoodie. "I beat the d-door until I heard clopping of Chiron's hooves." He sniffled and wiped at his nose. "I shadow traveled away and w-watched to make sure he found her..." Nico trailed off.

"What?" Percy managed to choke out. "What happened?"

"H-He really cared for her, Percy. He really did..."

They clung to each other like the lifelines they were and bared their grief to the world. Their shirts became soaked with tears and the world of flashing neon lights around them became nothing but a blur. Through their painfilled sobs, they struggled to listen to the beating of their eternally young hearts.

"He'll- He'll take care of her," he sobbed, drying their clothes. "He'll honor her and tell her dad."

And only we'll know the heights she would have reached.

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