The W2RLD

Written by: Leon the Man

Edited by: The Masked Eidolon

Enjoy 🙂

Chapter 3 - Moving into Position

"Neon," Mox called out as he left the room with Kira in it.

"Mox, any success at all with Kira?"

"Nope. He keeps on claiming he has 'plot armor' and I won't kill him. But we NEED the info he has - he's a senior adviser, he knows practically everything there is to know about Virgil."

"True," Neon mused. "You need to get the information out of him. I'll go pull up his file, maybe that should help."

"Okay, by the way, any luck with Cunningham?"

"Yes, actually." Neon smiled. "The idiot told me everything in hopes of me tying him back up, which I of course didn't do."

"Why not?" Mox inquired.

"I'm not going to feed into his perverted fantasies. The room is locked, he won't get out. Anyway, he didn't give a lot of information simply because he didn't have a lot of information, but he has revealed what we feared - Virgil knows Daniel is Russian. They're actively searching for him right now, so he can't return back to us. He's basically on the run, and if they catch him, he's dead."

"Damn," Mox cursed. "That's quite the problem. But, to be honest, I think Daniel can survive. He's talented."

"He is, but Virgil has over fifty total people, according to Lucas, searching for him."

"Neon, as long as The Inspector doesn't return, we'll be fine."

Neon frowned. The Inspector, which was the nickname for Ethan Clarke, was the person the Dark Knights feared the most. Aside from being extremely smart and clever, he was the only person in the kingdom who the Dark Knights didn't have a PF (Personal File) on.

And that was quite the problem.

"You're right, Mox. Now then, let's check out Kira's file."

They walked up to the large computer and typed in "Kira Cummings."

After circling for a few seconds, the computer loaded the following information:

Kira, aka Kira Cummings, enjoys coming. His other interests include being Senior Adviser to King Virgil the 69th, being smart, and most importantly, being a weeb.

He has watched over 42000 anime and read over 23000 manga. Some who know him well even report him believing the real world is actually an anime.

Pros: Senior Adviser of King Virgil, has good taste in anime, and is decently smart. He's a true diehard weeb and will kill you if you dare say SAO Part 2 is better than the first part

Cons: Watches TOO MUCH ANIME AND HENTAI

"Well this guy certainly seems like an anime lover," Neon observed.

Mox scratched his chin.

"We can use this. I have a plan for getting the information out of him. Go check on Cunningham," Mox recommended. Neon nodded.

"Sounds good."

As Mox headed off back to Kira, Neon went back to the room Lucas was locked inside of.

She took out her key and opened the door.

She opened the door, walked in, and looked around.

Wait, where was Lucas?

Suddenly, her eyes widened as she realized what had happened.

She spun around just in time to see Lucas winking as he shut the door behind him.

She flew to the door and began instantly banging on it, begging to be let out, but Lucas obviously ignored her.

Great. Now, she was stuck inside a closed off torture room while an enemy roamed the premise of her lair.

Great. Everything was going just great.

Let us now temporarily switch to a character who everyone will surely like even though we've barely introduced him yet, Oliver.

Ding! The doorbell of the sex shop rang pleasantly.

The owner of the store, Charlie Lawson, aka Crayon, looked up and smiled.

"Hey, my favorite customer is back!"

"Hello," Oliver replied sheepishly.

Oliver, James and Bonnie's younger sibling, was a curious child. He never stayed in the mansion - he was always out running on the streets, chasing after a bird or squirrel or drug dealer.

He only sleeps in his siblings' mansion at night, and sometimes he even sleeps somewhere else.

In short, he may technically be the one and only brother of Emperor Virgil, but he's not exactly the model prince.

"How's it going, pal?" Crayon asked. He and Oliver were pretty close friends since he often visited Crayon's store...for completely wholesome reasons, of course.

"I lost my most recent waifu pillow," Oliver admitted. "Can I order another one?"

"Sure," Crayon grinned. "Custom made, I assume? Anyone in particular that you want me to paint over the pillow?"

"Hmmm, I'll leave the choice up to you Crayon," Oliver chuckled. "How's business going?"

"It's going okay, but recent tension with the Ukrainian dude, Daniel, has been grabbing everyone's attention. You're the first customer today, actually."

"Wait," Oliver interrupted. "Who's this Daniel?"

"He's a Russian," Crayon sighed. "Have you not heard the rumors? Somehow, there's a Russian in the Virgil Empire."

"Oh..." Oliver trailed off. "Okay, well, Crayon, I'll stop by tomorrow to grab the waifu pillow - I'll pay you then."

"Sounds good, Oliver! See you then!"

Oliver grinned widely and trotted out of the store.

Once he was outside, his expression changed.

Daniel...Ukrainian Dude...

Oliver had dreamt about him a week ago. No explanation. Just a dream. And now, he was real...

Was Oliver really what he thought he was? Was he...a psychic?

I'll stop the story now to say that this isn't the first time Oliver's dreams have come true.

As I've said before, after World War 4.20, he was the very first one to rise above the rubble and pull James out. He was the first, and maybe, somehow, that made him special.

He gave his older brother James control of the kingdom, but as I've said ten times now, he was the first one out of the ground.

5 years had passed since then, and during those five years, he had dreamt of many events that ended up happening.

Was he really a psychic after all?

I think this is the perfect time to switch to another character - Daniel, aka Ukrainian Dude.

I know the scenes with him are the most interesting, so let's develop his character!

"Damn it," Daniel hid under a rock. "The guards are everywhere. But I've almost made it to the point where I can make a run to the Dark Knights' lair. Just a bit more..."

He slowly stood up.

The coast was clear.

Just in case, he took out his dagger and advanced into the clearing between two rows of houses.

For context, the entrance to the Dark Knights' lair was actually an empty house. If you go to the bathroom, there is a hole in the floor through which you can get to the Dark Knights' hiding space.

That's where our Russian was headed.

He crouched down and advanced.

*Click*

Daniel spun around.

Standing in front of him was the Dark Knights' biggest enemy.

The Inspector, pointing a gun at Daniel's head.

"Hello, Daniel," Clarke smiled.

"Shit," Ukrainian thought. "I'm screwed."

"You must be surprised to see me. I'm assuming you've figured out who I am."

"I have," Daniel smirked. "You are The Inspector, aka Ethan Clarke. And I hate to ruin your moment, but I am not afraid of you. What are you gonna do, shoot me? You don't have the balls to do it."

Ethan smiled.

"You really want to test that? I'll give you two choices. Lead me to the Dark Knights' lair, or I'm putting a bullet in your head."

"Now now," Daniel took a step backwards and put up his hands, dropping the dagger. "Let's sort this out peacefully, like gentlemen."

"I'll count to three and then I'll shoot."

"Wait, wait!" Daniel struggled to think of something to say.

"Dear Inspector, please, if we go to the lair, we'll both be killed. And then I'll never lose my virginity!"

"I'll start counting now. 3...2...1..."

"Wait."

Both Daniel and Ethan turned around.

Like in all movies, they had somehow both completely not noticed a new character creeping up to them.

Jenny.

She is the only female person in the Virgil Empire. As I've said multiple times before, everyone else is a catfish.

LET ME STRESS THIS

SHE

IS

THE

ONLY

GIRL.

Bonk.

"Who are you?" Ethan inquired.

"My name is Jenny," Jenny replied. "Listen, with all due respect, Inspector, you won't make him talk. He's stupid and he's loyal to the Dark Knights. If you kill him, you'll never get any information out of him. Leave him to me, and I'll deal with him."

Ethan frowned. He didn't like it, but he agreed that Daniel wasn't going to give any information or lead him to the Dark Knights if he just kept on brute forcing it.

Before he could speak, however, Daniel beat him to it.

"Jenny, is it true, you is female?"

"I am indeed," her bored expression indicated she had received that question many times.

Ethan cleared his throat.

"Okay, I guess that could wo -"

"If you are truly a girl," Daniel interrupted him. "Could that mean...that you have...you have..."

Daniel fumbled for words uncomfortably.

"Could it be that you have...feet??" he asked, his face flushing red.

"What?" Ethan and Jenny exclaimed at the same time.

Daniel sighed.

"It is time for a backstory," he announced. "Since birth and arguably even before being born, I always knew I was unique. Have you ever noticed that people look at each other in the face when they talk? Well, I'm different. For whatever reason, as a child, whenever I spoke to someone, my face would just...drop. It was like it was pulled down by intense gravity. And before I knew it, I was always looking at people's feet. What mysterious force pulled me to them I have yet to discover, but I have since then become extremely educated in the science of said body part."

"So, uh," Jenny laughed nervously, "Inspector, can I take it from here."

"Fine," Ethan put his gun back in his pocket.

Please don't ask how Ethan's gun managed to fit into his pocket. Maybe his pocket is just really big, or maybe his gun is just really small. Idk.

"Daniel, come with me."

Daniel obeyed and winked to a stoic Ethan as he hurried after Jenny into her house.

Once they were inside, Jenny flipped the light switch on and took off her coat.

As she walked away into the kitchen, Daniel stayed put at the front door.

"Daniel!" She called. "Come inside already."

"Jenny..." Daniel whispered. "You took off your coat, but not your boots..."

He could feel the tears forming in his eyes. The betrayal. The pain.

"What's that?" She called out from the kitchen.

"Nothing!" Daniel wiped away his tears and entered the kitchen.

At this point, I will pause to say that I am a horrible writer who has used the word "kitchen" like twenty times in the past paragraph and I simply cannot figure out any synonyms for the word.

So, instead, I'll just use random words when I want to use the word "kitchen."

So, if I want to say something like "This is a kitchen," I will instead say "This is a book" or "This is a fork."

Understand?

Good. Back to the story.

Daniel sat down in the chair at the hamburger (word instead of kitchen) table across from Jenny.

After a few awkward moments of silence, Daniel spoke.

"You have a really nice seaweed (another word instead of kitchen, get used to it already)."

"Thanks," Jenny flashed a smile. "I designed my condom myself."

[To be clear, condom is another word I'm using instead of reusing the word kitchen - I'll stop pointing this out every time, so if you see a word completely out of place, assume it means "kitchen."]

"Oh. Well, yeah, I've been in a few houses and their suitcases aren't nearly as pretty as your emoji."

Jenny smiled again.

"I think the secret to making a kitten pretty is to have a cute design for the eyeball's walls."

"Yeah, it's the walls of the clit that really matter."

"What?" Jenny exclaimed, her face blushing red.

"Wha-all I said is that it's the walls of the kitchen that really matter."

Jenny stood up, suddenly furious.

"No you didn't. You said the walls of a clit!"

"No, the narrator substituted that word instead of the word "kitchen!""

[For the record, I did not substitute anything - that was just Daniel being stupid and hoping Jenny would think that I, the Narrator, would substitute a vulgar word in.

But, actually, those words were 100% his own, so don't blame me for it.]

"Hmph," Jenny plopped back down into her chair.

Daniel observed that judging by the sound of impact between Jenny's body and the chair, she was only applying 10% of her body weight to her feet.

Okay, I admit that was a completely unnecessary sentence.

"So, Jenny, you're planning on getting info out of me about the Dark Knights?"

"Actually, I'm not." Jenny announced as she stood back up (damn it Jenny, stay in one place).

"W-what do you mean?" Daniel asked.

"I don't plan on helping the Inspector," she replied, walking over to Daniel.

"King Virgil is a terrible ruler. His citizens are too stupid to realize it, but I know life should be better than this. Humans aren't meant to live like this. And because of that, I want change. I want...I want..."

She leaned over to whisper it in Daniel's ear.

"I want to join the Dark Knights." [Hah screw whoever was having pervy thoughts]

But, unfortunately, Daniel did not hear her.

The strong scent of her pleasant perfume and the feeling of her face being so close to his made him internally jump for joy.

She leaned back slightly, so that her face was just an inch away from Daniel's. It was...too good to be true.

He was talking to a real girl for the first time in his life - and she was so attractive!

"What do you say, Daniel? Can I join the Dark Knights?"

For a split second, Daniel didn't move or say a word.

Then he nodded, leaned forward, and kissed Jenny on the lips.

Needless to say, she did not take it well.

Jenny lurched backwards, tripping over a badly built floor, and landed on the ground.

"Daniel, what the fuck!!"

OK OK EVERYONE CHILL FOR A SEC

I know what you're thinking - OH NO, AN F WORD! But listen, PG-13 movies (and books) are actually allowed to have a maximum of one f-word, so don't worry, this is still PG-13. :-)

"I'm- I'm sorry!!" Daniel's face grew instantly pale from embarrassment.

"What do you mean, you're sorry? You just fucking kissed me!!" Jenny yelled.

Ah, well there goes the PG-13 rating. So much for that.

"Jenny, I genuinely apologize kind of probably," Daniel stood up. "I didn't mean to kiss you, I was, uh, trying to bite your neck and kill you but accidentally landed on your lips."

"Wow. What a wonderful excuse, Daniel."

"Not as wonderful as your toes, Jenny."

"One more comment about that and I will personally rip yours off."

"Ok, ok, sorry," Daniel sighed. He would need to be more creative than this, but sadly the effects from his earlier dose of vodka were wearing off, and he was beginning to think clearly.

And, as the famous Russian proverb goes, "Do not do if you could do with a drop of You*"

*You = a famous vodka brand, probably.

Jenny stood back up, wiping her lips with the back of her hand.

"And if you ever try to do something like that again, I'll kill you."

"Sounds good!" Daniel exclaimed eagerly.

"So, Jenny," he extended his hand. "Are you ready to go meet Neon and the rest of the Dark Knights?"

She hesitated, then nodded.

"I am. Let's go."

Damn why is this chapter so boring I'm sorry, I haven't been in bright spirits lately so typing this late at night after not getting enough sleep isn't going super well

Anyway, back to the story.

As I've made clear, the goal of this chapter is character development. And character development isn't very entertaining to read sometimes, but trust me, it pays off in the long run.

Chapter 4 will be more interesting.

BACK TO THE STORY DAMN IT

"Le pebble," STD thought as he trotted alongside Leon along the dirt path back to the cave.

To remind you in case you forgot - Leon, aka me, is the Narrator who lives with his pet guinea pig STD (short for Strong and Tough Dinosaur). We live far away from society, in an isolated jungle.

"STD, I have a problem," Leon said as he bent under a tree branch. "There's a ton of people who want to be part of the story, but I don't have space for everyone. The story just can't hold fifty main characters. There's not much I can do about it, too."

STD, being a guinea pig, obviously didn't reply.

"I think I'm going to resort to giving objects names..."

Leon stopped.

He bent down and picked up a stone.

Then, he bent down on one knee and took off his backpack. He took the laptop out and opened it.

As STD trotted closer to watch, Leon began typing:

New Personal File. Ryan, also known as Hamburger-Chan, is a...rock.

Leon paused to turn the rock over.

Pros: is a rock. Offers stable support to itself and anyone who steps on it. Is a good size - not too large to cause an inconvenience but not too small to somehow get inside of your shoe and annoy the hell out of you for the next five hours.

Cons: has the IQ of a, well, rock. Also, probably won't add too much to the plot of the story.

Leon saved the file, closed the laptop, and placed the Ryan (the rock) back on the ground.

He got up, brushed the dirt off his pants, and got ready to leave.

"Squeak!" Squeaked STD.

Leon sighed.

"You want me to take Ryan with us?

"Squeak!!"

"Fine."

Leon picked the rock and put it into his backpack.

"Let's go now, STD."

STD squealed happily and began running toward the cave.

Leon was about to go after him, when he felt something moving in his backpack.

Could it be...surely not...

Leon quickly unzipped his backpack.

Leon sighed. His suspicions were confirmed when he looked inside: his walkie talkie was vibrating.

Someone who was calling him.

And Leon knew exactly who it was.

Leon took out the walkie talkie and accepted the call.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Leon! We need your help - right now!" the voice replied through the walkie talkie.

"Our conversation could be monitored. Say no more, I'm on my way."

He immediately turned off the walkie talkie before the other person could reply.

"STD, get back over here!"

After a few seconds, the guinea pig reappeared, grumbling to himself.

"STD, get in my backpack. We're heading to the Virgil Empire. This is serious - there's about to be a civil war, and it's our job to make sure we end up on the winning side."

STD nodded and scrambled into the backpack. Once he was inside, Leon closed the backpack and swung it over his shoulder.

"Time to visit the Virgil Empire...it's been a while since I was last there. Well this is gonna be fun."

While all of this was happening, a familiar character, Mox, aka the partner of Neon, was standing in front of Kira, who was tied to a chair.

"Kira, this is your last chance to tell me everything peacefully."

"I won't," Kira replied. "I'm loyal to King Virgil, and as I've said before already, I have plot armor - there's no way a character like me will die in this chapter."

Mox laughed evilly.

"Hey Kira, you're a big fan of anime, right?"

"The biggest fan in the kingdom."

"Wonderful. Then how about we watch some anime together?"

Kira appeared confused.

"Sure, I guess..."

"Wonderful!" Mox exclaimed, turning on the TV. He navigated over to an anime and clicked the first episode.

"How exactly will this get me to admit all the kingdom's secrets to them?" Kira wondered.

The opening played for about a minute and then ended, revealing two characters with swords facing each other.

Both of them stayed silent for a few seconds.

Then, one of the characters spoke:

"And so, my friend, we meet again."

Kira's eyes widened as goosebumps ran down his body.

No...no...this couldn't be...

"You are no friend of mine!" The other character yelled.

"No!!!" Kira yelled. "Stop this!! Turn...it...off...please!!"

Kira frantically tried to cover his ears, but his hands were tied.

There was nothing he could do.

And it hurt...it hurt so much...the pain of true earrape from the dubbed version of an anime.

"Kira, if I turn it off, will you answer my questions?"

"Yes!!" Kira yelled. He hated betraying the kingdom and Virgil, but there was nothing he could do. The blood was probably flowing out of his ears already. The pain of watching the dubbed version of an anime...it was too much to bear.

Kira, like all the others, had cracked.

Oh, since we're on the subject of crack, let's switch over to Lucas.

Lucas, having recently escaped from the Dark Knights' lair by tricking Neon, was currently running across a huge desert to get as far away from their base as possible.

He wasn't exactly going in the right direction, but oh well, Lucas very smort.

As he ran across the desert, he thought about what he had just witnessed.

He now knew who Neon and the other Dark Knights were. He now knew where their base was. He even knew what technology they used and how they used personal approaches to their victims in order to get the information they needed.

Now, he just needed to get back to the Virgil Empire alive.

It was common knowledge that the Virgil Empire, located in Alabama, was the only place on the entire Earth inhabited by humans. The rest of the world was reduced to dust after World War 4.20.

And, indeed, the Dark Knights' lair wasn't an exception.

It was located about 30 miles away from the Virgil Empire, across a huge desert. There was surely a different way to get here that was much faster, but right now, Lucas needed to resort to getting back to Virgil by crossing a huge desert.

It was a nearly impossible trip, but it was his only chance.

And if he got the info to King Virgil, he would be recognized as a national hero. He, Lucas Cunningham, would be famous across the whole kingdom for single-handedly providing Virgil with the information needed to attack and destroy the Dark Knights.

As he jogged across the desert, he noticed someone far ahead in the distance. He tried to narrow his eyes and see who it was, but the person was too far to tell.

And so, Lucas trudged forward toward that person.

In a few minutes, he was within earshot.

"Hey!" Lucas yelled as he ran toward the person.

The mysterious individual continued walking toward Lucas, but he didn't seem to hear him.

As Lucas approached the man, he slowed to a stop a few meters in front of him.

The unknown young man stopped as well.

He was wearing a backpack and a large hat covering his face.

"Who are you?" Lucas asked, out of breath from the long run.

The man lifted his head, revealing his face. It wasn't anyone Lucas knew.

Then, the man did something Lucas did not expect.

Before Lucas could react, the man reached into his backpack and drew a gun.

"Wait-"

The gunshot echoed across the large sand dunes.

Lucas fell to his knees, clutching the bleeding wound on the left side of his chest.

The man had hit his heart.

The mysterious person, who I will now announce to be myself, Leon, put his gun back into his backpack and proceeded walking like nothing had happened.

As he passed by Lucas sprawled on the ground and bleeding to death, he stole a single glance at his withering body before continuing his slow walk forward.

As the light wind blew sand in his face and over his body, Lucas lay there for a few minutes in shock, wondering how long it would take before he bled out.

The sand slowly began to cover his body, burying it where it would never be found.

And all Lucas could do was helplessly watch as nature did its evil deed and slowly sucked away his life.

"Goodbye, everyone..." Lucas whispered, taking one final breath.

Wait.

Ouch.

"Shit!" Lucas exclaimed, sitting back up and slapping his shoulder.

As he removed his hand, it revealed a mosquito.

Wait...

How could he feel if he was dying?

Lucas quickly ripped off his shirt to see the wound.

That's when he realized that the bullet was made from red ink, created in order to imitate a gunshot wound.

Sure, there was a small scar, but almost all of the blood was fake.

The mysterious man...he hadn't meant to kill Lucas.

Lucas shuddered, picking up the bullet.

Then, he realized something else.

There was a piece of paper inside the bullet.

He took it out and shielded his eyes from the bright sun as he read it.

"Lucas, you're going the wrong way. If you want to live, come back to the Dark Knights' lair. I'll meet you there."

Lucas spun around, but the man was no longer in sight.

He looked back down at the fake bullet as the ink slowly dripped through his fingers.

"What...what do I do?" Lucas wondered.