Nova's POV

It's been 6 sunrises and sunsets since the siege happened and life feels okay now. I haven't seen my family as of now but in my heart I know that the christ will look after their happiness and well being. 

"Are you ready?" Torvi asks with towels in her hand and I nod

Torvi and I have become really close. Since Anna and Amelia disappeared, she has been by my side through all the torturous pain I went through. She has become a close confidant and a friend. I have no clue as to what she tells Ivar about me but I feel I can trust her, I can feel it in her eyes.

And Ivar? I haven't seen him in a long time, I wish to see him but I am frightened by his presence

Torvi helps in opening my corset as I bundle my hair forward, my hair have grown so much, they nearly touch my waist. 

A  bathtub is placed near the fireplace and I step into it with my right toe first, the water smells like lavender, Torvi sits on the bed and smiles at me.

"Hmmmmmmm, it feels so nice. The warm water on my skin" I close my eyes and take in the aroma and warmth

"It's been quite sometime since you took a bath" Torvi says and looks around at the room

"Alot of time" I say and I splash some water on Torvi

Torvi giggles and says, "You know i can't do that to you, you are my princess"

"Oh no, I am a french princess. You are a viking, you are not my subject" I laugh and blow a bubble in her direction

"What if someday you become a Queen?" Torvi's tone gets serious

"Hahahaha, I won't. I am a princess! I am not thirsty for any power" I say and I splash some water with my legs

"You will be a great Queen, If you happen to become one" Torvi's eyes gleam

"Andrew is a Prince but he will never be a king" I say absent mindedly

"Andrew?? who??" Torvi questions

"Christ! I forgot to tell you. Andrew, the love of my life" I blush and throw some water up in the air with childish excitement

"You love someone?" Torvi teases

"I don't know" I say, "But he loves me, he make me feel warm" I giggles and bite my lip

"What is love supposed to feel like Torvi?" I keep my hands on the edge of the bathtub and tilt my head to listen to what she has to say

"Well.... safe love is supposed to be peaceful and warm. You feel secure with that person and every morning you wake up to the knowledge that he is there by your side. You want to have children with this man and he makes your life comfortable and static" she says

I immediately think about Andrew

"But.." She says and looks deep in my eyes and kneels beside my bathtub

"But what?" I look into her deep set eyes and I am dying to what she has to say next

"There is a mad kind of love. The love that burns brighter than anything in the world. The blood in your veins become warm and cool at the same time. The kind of love that makes your heartbeat faster and your words quicker. This kind of love is mad love, he teaches you to fall in love with life and it's uncertainties. You fight and make love each day like animals. This kind of love cannot be tamed or understood, but only experienced" 

I am spellbound, I have never felt like this before. I want to know what that feels like, If it excites me to hear about it then I wonder what it would feel like to actually live it!

"EEEEE, Well I am a virgin and I have never felt anything like that before!" I say as my eyes widen with excitement

"A Virgin??" Torvi starts laughing and howling like a mad dog

"What's funny about that?" I ask with a little anger mixed with curiousity

"You are 21! 21?! and you have never made love? What is the point of you being so beautiful and perfect" She keeps laughing and falls on the floor

I look as my breasts which are underneath the bath water and I touch them gently, I wonder what it would feel like for them to be touched by a man

Torvi is nearly rolling on the floor

"So what if I never had sex? I am a catholic and unmarried. I have my virtue with me" I say and she laughs harder

Now she is amusing me and I laugh with her, I get out of my bath and wrap a silk towel around my body and sit next to Torvi on the floor, she is quieter now but happy tears are still rolling from her eyes

"Did.. you ... do..it?" I ask her and she starts laughing again, I hold her arm and ask her, "Did you? Tell me!!"

She gathers herself and says "Ofcourse I did it! In the kitchen, bed, my parents house" she says with mischief in her eyes, "And in.."

"AND WHERE??!!" I ask in the most excited state I have ever been in

"In the barn" She falls to floor again and I am dumbfounded with my moth open

"Barn???? HOW?! Ewwww" I say and start laughing with her, "So you have a man in your life?" I ask

"I have men in my life" Torvi giggles

"I can't believe you!" I say and swat her arm. I don't know why her story is making me excited and Imaginative at the same time

"I envy you" I say and stand up, still in my blue silk towel

"Don't, you have a choice to do it" She says and looks up to me

"I am a Catholic princess, I can never do it until I am married ofcourse" I remind her

"You are surrounded by Pagans. Your catholic morals don't hold true anymore, you can do whatever you want. I have heard Ivar has a soft corner for you and he is a beast in bed, " Torvi winks at me

"TORVI!" I say and I move to my big window to look outside then I stand there and look back at her again, "How can you even think of that?!" I say with a little anger.

"What? He is the finest ruler in the world and he has a soft corner for you" Torvi says and stands up 

"For me? How?" I ask her

"Don't be naive Nova, he decided to keep you safe and protect you. Ofcourse he has something for you. You just don't see it" She says as she starts making my bed

I look outside to make sense of what Torvi just said, I cannot fathom giving my virginity to Ivar. He is the most ruthless and unkind man I have ever met, maybe not to me but to the world and my family

"Think about it" Torvi says as she leaves with my dirty clothes and shuts the door behind her and I resume my mindless stare outside the window just feeling the coolness of the wind on my moist skin

Then I see him, talking to Hvitserk and laughing. He looks so happy and handsome. He examines the sword with his hands and his hands slide on the sword, I wonder what they would feel like on my body and his braided hair lights up something inside of me

Wait? What am I thinking? NO NO, He captured my family and plundered France. He is a devil worshipper too.

At that moment he looks upto to my window and we lock our eyes, He gives me a warm smile

My cheeks start flushing and my heart starts beating like the horse gallops. I have trouble breathing and my mind becomes numb. I try to move but I can't look away from his blue eyes. My chest rises and falls rapidly and the palm of my hands become sweaty. I try to speak but the words don't come out, my feet refuse to move and all my heart wants to do is stand there and keep looking into his blue eyes while the blood in my veins dances

Then I realize...........

I am standing there............ 

With only my silk towel..........

Around my body.............

Which means................

I AM NEARLY NAKED!!!!!

I come back to my senses while he smirks looking at me or my partially naked body and I hurriedly close the window and sit on the ground panting and finally I can breathe. It feels like I have lost my virginity to his clear blue eyes.

But I am Bewitched and I feel as though I will never be same again. 

Christ, what is happening to my body and soul?