Reminiscence of Longing
"Come, eat something Bondita... Else you'd continue to throw up like this."
Satya had kept a plate on the single cot infront of Bondita as she sat with her knees hurled up to her chest.
"I've been throwing up since the last few days."
She murmured, sniffing back, as he sighed at her words.
"I've noticed. It's the stress, and you're absolutely not eating... But now you'll have to eat, big day for you tomorrow."
"Yes, I've everything planned and in place. You just be ready Satya, everything depends on your timing."
Bondita swallowed hard, her throat dry, and she wiped the strains of agony from her face with her palm.
"Right... so I get up from the mandap once the red flag chain falls down... And then we run?"
Satya's face was buried into a bunch of letters, as Bondita rolled her eyes at him.
"No Satya, we won't run!" She stressed on her words.
"The plan is simple. Jhinuk would do all the rituals quietly, till her time to reach the wedding mandap, only that she won't reach the mandap and would escape with her mother through the backyard, and while going, her mother would cut the decorative flag chain hanging across the mandap, so that we would know the plan is successful... Understood?"
Her voice, although feeble, had a determination, and Satya kept aside the bunch of letters and telegrams that he'd been reading and looked at her quizzically.
"Umm... A little confusing with a hundred loopholes, but yes, I understood."
"What loopholes?"
Bondita frowned and Satya sighed, inching closer, as he too sat on the cot at her feet.
"Let's see... First, where would Jhinuk and her mother go at that hour? Next, what happens to the groom? And, last, what happens after this? How do you plan to face the crowd?"
Bondita was listening patiently, as a familiar feeling of nausea took over her, making her retch, and Satya held a glass of water already kept beside the food plate, making her drink from it.
"Alright, let's see... First point, Jhinuk's maternal uncle would be awaiting them at the old school building, and from there they'd board a cart and leave for Dhaka, along with Putul, the youngest one." She paused to breathe and drink some more from the glass, licking her rapidly drying lips.
"And, you would have to take care of the groom, try to reason with him, if not, use your ways, and take his place instead... And once we see the signal, we'll reveal ourselves at the mandap, bunking the wedding."
Satya gaped at her.
"That's your plan? And then what? The entire village versus us... They'll beat us to death!"
"No... How would they, if you're armed with your pistol already!" Bondita winked, and Satya frowned in displeasure.
"And what if someone informs at the local police Chowki? Remember, this is Mymensing!"
Bondita exhaled and looked away.
"That could be a concern, but if we are fast and prompt then this can be averted too." She murmured thoughtfully, and Satya narrowed her eyes at her.
"This is important Satya, it's a question of a child's life... Please." She pleaded and Satya exhaled sharply.
"I'll do it. But know this Bondita, if police gets involved, then you won't find me around, then I won't know you, and you won't know me... As the punishment of just being my associate could put you to a lifetime imprisonment or worse, Kalapani!"
Satya got up and Bondita pushed the plate aside, brooding on his words.
"I understand Satya!"
Bondita was lying down on the cot, her eyes closed, and the food remained untouched on the floor. The temporary curtain drawn on the discussion had made them more thoughtful, as the duo drifted off to their mind palace, lost in their own concerns.
"Bondita..." Satya had suddenly called her, and she turned aside on the bed.
"Your Calcutta house, is this postal code correct?" He handed her an opened envelope and Bondita got up from the bed slowly, eyeing the paper.
"Yes, it is! But whom are you sending this to? There's no one..."
"Batuk. He's supposed to check it regularly, but this is the third telegram which I'd be sending tomorrow morning."
"He'd probably be in Tulsipur." Bondita murmured, and Satya raised an eyebrow at her in annoyance.
"No Bondita, he can't be... He's given a responsibility, and he's to fulfill it, at any cost, there's no place for drifters here, and no mercy!"
Bondita nodded quietly, and that old feeling of nausea crept back, making her core wretch in pain.
"I... I think I'll throw up again." She ran outside to the porch and retched, yet nothing came out but water.
"Extreme acid reflux, Bondita... Uff... Eat for god's sake."
Satya too had followed her out, as Bondita washed her face and turned around.
"Or..." She gulped nervously at him, "Could I be..."
The expression on Satya's face had changed at once, as he pulled Bondita quickly under the bright yellow light of the gas bulb, especially brought for the marriage decorations. His eyes were now narrowed on her face, as he held Bondita's wrist and started to count her pulse.
"Stick your tongue out." He asked politely, and Bondita complied.
"When did you bleed last?"
Bondita gulped and looked down at his question.
"Umm... Six... Six days back."
"And, when was the last time you two..."
Satya's words were uninhibited, yet they made Bondita flush at once.
"At the hotel, and the forest..."
She gulped and looked away, frowning at her first, and then bursting out into a fit of laughter.
"In the forest? Gods have mercy... But when? We're there the whole time, and Rai had the tent occupied!"
"Uff!" Bondita moved her wrist away from his grip, and looked away, as colours of shame returned the regularity on her pale cheeks once again.
"Tell me if I'm or not." She murmured softly and Satya stopped his laughter and exhaled.
"No... You're not my dear, atleast what it appears now, you're many things but pregnant."
"Many things?"
"Ignorant, funny and cute to start with."
Bondita frowned at him in annoyance, and Satya bit his lower lip in a playful apology, making her sit on the cot, as he himself sat on the floor, by her feet.
"Anirudh Da is a wise man, Bondita... you've been vomiting since that forest night after eating those fishes. If he'd have sensed any signs of pregnancy, he'd have moved the earth and sea to not let you get separated from him in anyway... And, by now, you would have been eating grape juice in the cosy comfort of your own bedroom, with him fanning your face.
"Dhaat!"
Bondita pouted and flinched her face at him.
"No truly Bondita, you are most definitely not pregnant because there is something called safe days, a few days after you bleed, when if you have intercourse, you won't possible get pregnant..."
"Really?"
Bondita gasped and looked up at him in disbelief, and Satya winked at him teasingly.
"Unless he's a god... Gods, apparently can have babies within a day's time."
Bondita held the pillow and smacked him playfully with it.
"Ouch!" Satya got up, smiling.
"You don't believe me... So tell me how was Karna born to Kunti?"
"Uff... Stop irritating me..."
Bondita rolled her eyes and turned to sleep once again, but Satya had held her by her shoulders, and his prompt action made her gasp and look up.
The cold food plate was now held in his hand, and Satya was holding a small morsel of roti and brinjal in his left hand, reaching up to her lips.
"Eat Bondita, for I'm hungry too."
He smiled, and the calmness in his eyes suddenly made her feel at ease.
"You eat." She murmured softly, but the food held in his hand had already made it to her mouth.
"How can I, when my Sudama is hungry!" He hushed, and somehow the nausea didn't feel that bad anymore.
Bondita smiled and chewed the food, her eyes closed and praying.
Hey Maa Durga... Please help me find him... Please...!
She breathed.
..........................................
There was something so heavenly about a kiss in the rain, a tender moment that just won't wait. It was that burst of love that was expressed, not caring if the water soaked through to chill the skin. It was a connection that showed the strength of the feeling, the mutual need. It was, as if a rebellion against the elements. Nature could bring the rain but the inner sunshine comes through just the same.
Batuk and Mira had returned back to their respective seats, drenched completely with a moment of untamed emotions, and it was only once that their lips had touched, passionately, but the rest of the journey was quiet, contemplative. None spoke to each other, but they continued their conversations with their own hearts.
A kiss in the rain could bring more warmth and shelter than jackets and umbrellas ever could, and Batakrishna Roy Chowdhury had felt the overwhelming power of that kiss, his heart fluttering as if the organ itself, with its blood and muscles, had suddenly transformed into a fluffy ball of feathers, light and cosy. He felt light, he felt full. There wasn't any sense of desire in that moment, barring the indomitable desire to look into her eyes, and hold her hands, and make her smile.
Batuk was smiling, and the speed of the car was much more steady now, carefully driven around the puddles and undulation, and Mira wasn't jumping in fear anymore.
"You want water?"
Batuk had promptly asked when Mira coughed up a little, and she nodded her head in a negation silently.
"Chocolates?"
Mira nodded again, and instead of looking down, she was looking outside the window, into the darkness, her mind playing hide and seek with the raindrops.
What did just happen to her? Did she just touch him with her lips?
Her lips!
No one had ever touched her lips with love, no one had ever kissed her, and the thought of sharing this moment with the exquisitely handsome man sitting beside her made Mira's heart pound and breath hitch to her throat.
Kiss happens in love! Wrenched witches like her aren't supposed to feel such emotions!
Mira had heard these words, not once but many times so as to allow them to sink in to her mind, but at that moment, taking a quick glance at the man's face, his sharp nose and slightly curled up lips, Mira felt a twitch in her heart.
No way on earth would this angel ever love her!
Who was she?
A tribal orphan... A widow.. not once but twice... A mother... A sufferer... Used, tormented!
How on earth can a man... A man such as Batakrishna Roy Chowdhury love her! It's impossible...!
Mira sighed, and Batuk offered her a chocolate,
"Last one Mira, eat it." He kept the chocolate coin on her lap, startling her, as she slowly opened the wrapper and ate it.
"It's... It's good."
She murmured, and the long forgotten bittersweet taste of the chocolate made her throat choke with emotions. An entire period of torment and struggle fresh in her memories once again.
Batuk was driving quietly, once started to hum a tune on his own, only to get conscious the very next moment. He was happy, and Mira felt a share of his radiating happiness.
It was still raining when the car had stopped inside the shaded garage of the zamindar Haweli, with two blackboards and jute mats heaped at one corner.
Batuk had got down and opened the door for her, and like a lady, Mira held his extended knuckles and got out slowly.
"What are these?" Her curious eyes had fallen on the blackboards and Batuk smiled proudly.
"This is my little school... For the women of my village."
"Do you teach?" She gasped, and Batuk smiled again.
"When I'm here, Yes... Else Nakul does."
"What do you teach?" Mira was now rubbing her hand on the board very tenderly, with fondness, and Batuk shook his head vigorously, splattering droplets of water from his hair.
Mira giggled, wiping her lips, and Batuk saw droplets of water settled on her face, making her appear aesthetically irresistible.
"We teach the basics... Alphabet, number literacy, health and hygiene." Batuk paused, and Mira interjected promptly.
"Can I come here?"
"To teach?" Batuk frowned, and Mira lowered her head bashfully.
"I can try." She murmured.
Her words were free, although painted in a hue of shame, they didn't have fear in them, and sensing this little courage, Batuk walked up to her, making her step back, till her body was pressed against the blackboard.
"What else would you be willing to try Mira?" His voice was hoarse and Mira looked up at his face, only a few inches away from hers, and his water drenched chin took her breath away. His large eyelashes were fluttering at her, his orbs concentrated on her face, and Mira bit her lips in nervousness, the proximity of his closeness was making it different for her to breath even!
"I... I got something for you."
She murmured, and Batuk widened his eyes at her.
"A gift? Where?" He smiled, leaving her way and Mira looked away bashfully once again.
"In my room... I made it... In Dehradun."
She smiled and slithered away from him, and Batuk stood there, looking at her extraordinarily beautiful appearence, even more alluring after their little encounter in the rain.
"Meet me outside my room." Mira casted her gaze down and hushed, and Batuk inched a little closer and raised his hand, moving away a wet strand of hair from her forehead.
"No, meet me at the terrace... I'm not yet done with the rain." He muttered.
The night had grown on every soul inside the haweli, the cacophony of soft snoring, along with the chirping of the crickets outside confirmed the entrapment of dreams that had occupied every mind sleeping that night, but barring two souls.
Mira had tiptoed up the stairs, pushing the half closed door open, as her eyes fell on Batuk's angelic feature, standing at a distance, his arms stretched, embracing the drizzle, and his eyes closed to welcome the droplets on his eyelids.
Mira gulped at the sight. His strong muscles, his sculpted shoulders, his chiseled torso, everything about him felt like a magnet, drawing her entire being to sin.
Mira shuddered at the thought.
"Come here... The shade is no fun."
Batuk had turned around, and was beckoning her to come near him, as like an enchanting soul Mira followed his direction, inching closer to him with every small step, her left hand hidden at the back, holding a small object in it.
"My gift?"
Batuk demanded, and Mira placed a earthen instrument in his hand.
"An ektara!" Batuk gasped, tugging gently at the string and then chuckled softly.
"What Mira, you want me to be a Bairagi now, sing bairag?"
He teased her, and Mira nodded her head vehemently.
"No... I... I can make these... So I thought... S- Sorry!"
She murmured and turned to leave, but Batuk had caught hold of her arm by then.
"Don't leave... " He called out, mouthing a thank you with it, and Mira looked away, her cheeks radiating all shades of red at one go.
"Can you sing?" He asked her, and Mira looked down.
"No, I can only play these strings."
"Would you play for me?" Batuk had kept the instrument under a shade of a terrace decoration, as he neared her, holding her by both her shoulders, and Mira smiled at him.
"One day."
"Mira..."
His voice was soothing, and more was her name from his mouth, and Mira looked up to meet his gaze. There was an unsaid fire, an unknown sensuality, and somehow the moment aided to it, enslaving both in its charms.
"Mira, you look very beautiful when you smile." He hushed, his face had now lowered down to her neck, and Mira shivered in his embrace, feeling the touch of his warm breath on her cold skin.
"I would always want you to smile." He added, his hands now sliding down her moist arms, and Mira pressed her eyes shut and continued to tremble.
"Did you like it?" Batuk had gulped with the question, and suddenly Mira's hands had clutched the back of his shirt, making him quiver in need.
"Tell me Mira... Did you like the touch of my lips... Pressed on yours..."
His words were a hush, his voice husky, and it had made her grip tighten on his body, her breathing rapid and irregular.
Batuk inhaled sharply, the sweet smell of petrichor along with the fragnance of Mira's hair, and automatically his lips lowered down on hers, his eyes closed, and his right hand had moved up to cup her thin jawline.
"Mira..." He breathed her name in her mouth, and she parted her lips in response, as very gently he filled the gap between their eager lips, sucking away the raindrops from her mouth with a great tender passion.
"Choto Zamindar Babu!" Mira had gasped, breaking free from the ministrations of his lips, but Batuk pulled her face closer, plunging his tongue inside her mouth deeper this time.
Mira whimpered, and tried to push him away, faintly, and Batuk continued to kiss her with his everything.
"Ummff... No... mmm...!"
Mira half moaned half resisted his kiss, and he pulled himself away from her, as abruptly as he had started, leaving Mira conflicted, perhaps gaping for more.
"It's raining a lot...!" He had moved behind, picking up the ektara, walking back to the staircase, and Mira breathed rapidly, clutching her saree firmly, trying to calm her palpitating heartbeat.
"Don't stand in the rain, or else I'll have to treat you tomorrow." Batuk had looked at her with a burning intensity in his eyes, hard to miss, and Mira felt that heat touching her core, searing her sense of right and wrong in it's fire.
"I'll be downstairs, at the study."
He casted a final glance at her before walking down the stairs, leaving Mira in the rain, and an open invitation to submit to the burning pyre of his passion.
Mira stood still for a few minutes, before she too walked down the stairs, standing at the crossroad at the bottom, the left would lead to the colourless salvation, and the right to sin, she gulped and took the right.
It had taken her a little more than a few minutes to muster the courage to push the door open, the blue shawl wasn't covering her anymore, and the soaked saree wasn't doing justice in sheathing her alluring feminity in anyway. Her hair was wet, open, cascading below her knees and in the dim flame of the candle, Mira stood infront of Batuk, with her heart and her soul in a plate, ready to be offered at his feet.
But Batuk hadn't looked up, and in that scanty light of the lamp, his eyes were scanning a few envelops with absolute sincerity, the ones he had got from the brunt letter box.
"Batuk Babu..."
Mira had finally spoken, after battling a lot with her inner self, addressing him by his first name, but surprisingly Batuk hadn't looked up... And, when he did, the gaze in his eyes had changed completely. The fire was still there, but it wasn't for her anymore. He was looking at her, yet not, and Mira tiptoed backward and wrapped the loose end of her wet saree around her head, covering a considerable part of her exposed shoulders.
"Mira... " Batuk's voice sounded grave, apprehensive, and he stuffed two envelopes in his pocket, and pulled out the car keys from the drawer.
"Mira... I've to go out, it's urgent." He walked towards her and touched her shoulder, and Mira nodded her head slowly.
"Tell Kaka I'll be back by noon tomorrow, and I'm taking the jeep..." He paused, "And..."
He reached to the door, only to turn around one last time.
"Wait for me.."
Batuk smiled once, before leaving, and Mira closed her eyes, her hand had automatically raised up to her forehead.
"Dugga dugga..." She murmured.
..............................................
Hey dear readers,
Hope you all are doing well.
This is my second update for the day.
And I'll post the next once these two chapters gets their due votes.
So let me know how this chapter was.
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