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Love Or Lie

Do I cross your mind, the way you do mine 
Do you still hold flowers of affection for me, 
Do you still feel for me - love me in a way it's 
Once in a blue moon or was everything I saw 
A lie, was it an act: us the characters enacting a
Portion of play- Romeo and Juliet except it ended 
Up in the death of love and feelings while we are alive.

You left an air of emptiness behind,
Though I no longer feel for you, I do 
Wonder - why you.
Why you, my first proper relationship in awhile 
In this year of 2022, why did I choose you in that moment,
Would things have been different had I not called you out 
On your actions, would your so called love still exist then? 
A love or lie, an illusion, a puzzle; spider Web I find myself in 
Not trapped yet reflecting. 
Was it necessary for me to experience what I did with you,
What if we had never crossed paths, keeping our respective 
Prosperity intact.
Two people with the same meaning shouldn't date.
King Of Prosperity, you & I whose name means Prosperity, 
Should've never dated. 
Ridhi - Nidhi shouldn't have existed, even if we only dated for 
A brief moment. 
If not meant to be, then why destiny made us cross paths? 

I burned in fire of adoration for you,
Even though it lasted a brief moment, I fell for you 
Like you were a fallen angel & upon 
Reflection, I wish I never had. 
Never had liked you even though my feelings have 
Faded, My affection for you ceased into inexistence, 
The experience still lingers in my memory,
Fresh as a fruit though rotten at its base.

Nidhiraj I adored you.
And these words will only be words now, 
Not exist in reality yet I'll write it out.
I loved you, I adored you, you were the first 
Guy I ever actually fell for in my 19 years of being alive. 
I loved you and I don't now.
You healed my soul for a fortnight & broke my heart 
For the remaining year.
Letting to, moving on, I never meant anything to you,
Did I? 
I won't get answers or closure so its silly asking questions, 
I won't but once upon a time, I loved you and I Wish 
I never had, you're not worthy of my love or of me 
So I'm glad you're not there in my life,
I regret choosing you, the first guy I fell hard for genuinely,
Felt like I fell in love while all you showed me was a lie.

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