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Rom-Comedy of Bluffs

After an intense India tour of South Africa in 2015, it was time for the players to catch their breath, step off the pitch, and into the ordinary rhythms of life. And for Rohit, that meant stepping into a different kind of spotlight — the glow of an upcoming wedding. Rohit had long been destined to tie the knot with his beloved girlfriend Ritika, his partner through the ups and downs of life off the field. With wedding bells on the horizon, there were arrangements to be made, traditions to uphold, and, of course, the age-old ritual of wedding shopping.

It was a task that Rohit, having little interest in the complex details of fabric and design, found himself dreading. And given the choice he would have gladly delayed it for some more time, had it not been for the insistence of Virat, "Ro, it'll be fun!"

Reluctantly, Rohit agreed, knowing that resistance was futile against Virat's persuasive powers. Rohit found himself being dragged along by Virat to the car and as they parked their car in the parking of the mall, Rohit couldn't help but feel a sense of overwhelmed by the thought of shopping. Virat, however, seemed excited, "Come on, Ro, let's find you the perfect outfit!" he exclaimed, Virat exclaimed, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

Rohit rolled his eyes, and quipped, "You seem as excited as if it's your own wedding."

Virat's chuckles echoed through the space,"Come on Ro, this is your wedding we're talking about! You've got to find the perfect outfit to sweep Ritika off her feet."

Rohit felt his cheeks warm with a soft blush, a silent acknowledgment of the deep affection he harbored for his soon-to-be bride. Despite his best efforts to maintain a facade of nonchalance, he couldn't hide the fondness that crept into his voice whenever Ritika's name was mentioned.

"Yeah, yeah," Rohit muttered in response, his tone tinged with a mixture of bashfulness and genuine warmth.

Virat caught the subtle change in Rohit's demeanor and grinned knowingly, nudging him playfully as they entered a shop.

"I see that smile, Ro. You're absolutely smitten, aren't you?" he teased, earning a sheepish yet affectionate chuckle from Rohit in response.

Rohit maintained a facade of composure despite the teasing, his words laced with a hint of playful threat, "If you are gonna tease me then I might as well just leave you here to handle the wedding planning on your own. Lord knows you have enough energy for both of us. But then again, I wouldn't want you to mess up my big day with your over-the-top ideas." His lips curled into a mischievous smirk, his eyes glinting with mischief as he glanced over at Virat, in return he earned a hearty laugh from Virat.

Amidst their banter, Rohit took a moment to snap a photo of yet another sherwani, promptly sending it off to his mom for her opinion. Meanwhile, Virat attempts to persuade him to accompany him to a family function, "Ro, c'mon, just tag along with me to my family function. It'll be fun. I promise."

Rohit shot Virat a glare and said, "Ohh yeah like this shopping expedition has been fun so far? I'm drowning in sherwani options, thanks to you. Nah thanks, I'll pass."

Virat let out an exaggerated sigh, employing his best puppy-dog eyes as he pleaded, "But Ro, I'll be so bored without you. And you know how lively my family events are, especially with your charm and wit."

Aware of Rohit's weakness, Virat appealed to him with sincerity. Rohit, however, remained firm, questioning, "Do you see me as some sort of entertainment machine, Vi? Last time I checked, I wasn't equipped with a built-in 'fun' button."

Virat continued to whine, "Ro, you won't go shopping all day in Delhi, just attend the function with me, I mean think of it as a chance to showcase your impeccable charm and wit to my mum. She will love you!"

Rohit raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. "Ah yes, because certainly your mum doesn't already consider me as her son." Rohit grinned, rolling his eyes playfully.

Virat chuckled, shaking his head. "True, she does adore you. But seriously, Ro, I could use some backup in dealing with my overenthusiastic relatives."

Rohit scoffed, "Backup? More like a sacrificial lamb for the relative group."

Virat gasped in mock offense, clutching his heart dramatically. "Ro, how could you say that? I'm hurt! You know I'd never throw you to the wolves like that."

Right at that moment, Rohit's mobile buzzed. He fished it out from the pocket of his denim jeans and saw the caller ID, which read 'Ma'. He picked it up and answered, "Ji ma, wahi pe hoon, Vi ke saath sherwani shopping kar raha hoon... Ji one second, main aapko uske pics bhejta hoon." (Yes mom, I am there, Vi and me are doing Sherwani shopping ... Yes one second, I will send you the pics)

Virat again tried his luck, "Come on, Ro. I really want you to be there. Just tag along."

Without looking up from the sherwanis he was examining, Rohit took a picture of one to send to his mother and replied, "Just shut up for a second, Vi!" As he hit the 'send' button, he continued speaking to his mother, "Yeh vaala sahee dikh raha hai... kyon nahi sahee lag raha hai aapko yeh? Obviously, obviously Vi ki hi toh fashion sense kamal hai, meri jaise humans ki fashion sense toh kuch hoti hi nahi hai." (This looks good... why isn't it looking good to you? Obviously, obviously Vi's fashion sense is amazing, humans like me don't have much fashion sense like him)

Rohit said, his tone dripping with sarcasm as he glanced over at Virat, who was now making exaggerated sad faces in an attempt to guilt trip him into agreeing to attend the family function. Seizing the opportunity, Virat grabbed Rohit's mobile from his grasp and shot him an accusatory glare before beginning dramatically, "Aunty, after a whole 8 years, 6 months, and 4 days of our friendship, aapke bete ko humari dosti todani hai." (Translate text with your camera
Aunty, after a whole 8 years, 6 months, and 4 days of our friendship, your son wants to break our friendship.)

Rohit's eyes widened in surprise as he turned to face Virat, swiftly reclaiming his phone and retorting, "Nehi ma, maine yeh nahee bola, I just said Vi to shut up for a sec, cause he was annoying me." (No mom, I didn't say that, I just said Vi to shut up  for sec, cause he was annoying me.)

Virat's hand darted forward once more, snatching the phone back with a fluid movement. His expression morphed into one of feigned innocence as he spoke, "Toh phir main kya socho aunty, he asked me to shut up not cause I was 'annoying' him, isne mereko 'shut up' isliye bola kyu ki I was begging 'my own' bestie to tag along with me to a family function of mine...exactly Aunty, dekho kya zamaana aa gya hai, even after begging your bestie, the guy still denies it." (So what should I think aunty, he asked me to shut up, not cause I was 'annoying' him, he asked me to 'shut up' cause I was begging 'my own' bestie to tag along with me to a family function of mine... Exactly aunty, look at what era has came, even after begging  your bestie the guy stills denies it.)

Rohit tried snatching the mobile from Virat's hand, only for Virat to slap his hands away while moving a little back, "ab aap hi samajho iss idiot ko...Ji aunty surely I will make sure ki he picks out the best stuffs, don't worry." (Now only you explain this idiot.)

"Yeh lo, aunty wants to talk to you, Ro." (Here take it,aunty wants to talk to you, Ro.)

Virat said, passing the mobile to Rohit. As Rohit took his phone from Virat, shaking his head at his friend's antics, and brought it to his ear. "Ji Ma...arey yar Ma, Vi melodrama kar rha hai, don't fall for it...nehi maine yeh kab kaha... har bar aap Vi ki side leti ho...acha acha fine I will go...haan ji, I will bring that too. Love you, bye." (Yes ma.. Yar ma, Vs is doing melodrama, don't fall for it...nope, when did I said that...every time you take down near V...Ok ok ok I will leave. ..Yes, I will bring that too. Love you, bye.)

He said, cutting the call. He then turned to Virat, shaking his head with a smile, but before he could speak, Virat interjected, "It is alright if you don't wanna come, I will ask Jinks or Jaddu to tag along."

As Rohit listened to Virat's casual mention of asking other friends to accompany him to the family function, he felt jealous, "I never said I'm not coming, Vi."

Virat smirked, seeing his plan was working. He knew that if Rohit didn't fall for his puppy eyes, he would surely fall for this move. And Rohit didn't disappoint him either. Virat mentally patted himself on the back and decided to tease Rohit, "I knew it, no one could resist my persuasive charm," he teased, relishing every moment of Rohit's jealousy.

Rohit was about to retort when a sales guy interrupted, "Excuse me, sir, would you like to see some more options for sherwanis?"

The interruption broke the tension between Rohit and Virat, causing them both to chuckle. Rohit glanced at Virat, rolling his eyes playfully before turning his attention to the salesperson. "Oh, no thank you, we would like to buy just these two for now," he replied with a smile, gesturing towards the sherwanis he and Virat were holding. The salesperson nodded and led them to the counter to complete the purchase.

Rohit, having survived the shopping ordeal with Virat the previous day, found himself once again thrust into the whirlwind of another social event: a function hosted by Virat's family. The evening was filled with a buzz of conversations, laughter, and the clinking of glasses. Rohit and Virat were deeply engaged in a conversation with Vikas, Virat's elder brother, exchanging stories and laughs, until someone called Vikas away, leaving the two friends alone for a moment.

Rohit saw a waiter approaching with a tray of drinks. Feeling the dryness in his throat, he reached out and grabbed a glass of Coke, taking a refreshing sip. The cold drink soothed his parched throat, and he took a moment to appreciate the lively atmosphere around him. The venue was adorned with twinkling lights and colorful decorations, a testament to the family's love for celebrations. Rohit felt a warm sense of belonging as Virat's relatives greeted him with genuine smiles and gestures of hospitality. While his eyes roamed the vibrant scene, his mobile phone buzzed in his pocket. Fishing it out from the pocket of his black trousers, he saw a message from Ritika. She had sent him her flight details, which he quickly acknowledged with a thumbs-up emoji. As he slipped his phone back into his pocket, he heard Virat sigh beside him. Rohit shifted his focus towards Virat, preparing to ask what was bothering him when a shrill voice cut in before he could speak.

"Vi, there you are!" A woman approached with an eager grin, her gaze fixed on Virat, who appeared slightly uneasy with the sudden attention.

Rohit observed the interaction with curiosity, noting the slight shift in Virat's demeanor. Sensing his friend's discomfort, Rohit smoothly intervened, extending a friendly smile to the woman. "Hello, I'm Rohit," he introduced himself, offering his hand in greeting. "And you are...?"

The woman's gaze shifted from Virat to Rohit, her smile. The woman's attention shifted from Virat to Rohit, her smile fading slightly, and Rohit couldn't miss the hint of disdain in her eyes. Though he extended his hand, she merely crossed her arms, her attitude turning cold. "Rohit," she echoed his name with a hint of disdain as if it left a bitter taste in her mouth.

Virat, sensing the sudden tension, shifted uncomfortably, his eyes darting between Rohit and the woman. He attempted to diffuse the situation with a forced chuckle, "Uh hey, Nisha, yeah, this is Rohit, my -"

But Nisha interrupted Virat with, "Vi, darling, you didn't tell me you were bringing your little friend along," she interjected, her tone dripping with condescension as she emphasized the word 'friend.'

Annoyance flickered in Rohit, but he remained composed, offering a polite smile despite the thinly veiled insult. "Nice to meet you," he replied evenly, though his words carried a subtle edge, betraying his irritation.

Nisha redirected her attention to Virat, ignoring Rohit's presence as she leaned in closer, her voice taking on a flirtatious tone. "Virat, darling, I've been searching everywhere for you. Let's talk about you, instead of focusing on someone else," she purred, her gaze lingering suggestively on him.

Rohit couldn't help but feel a wave of discomfort wash over him as he watched Nisha's overly flirtatious behavior towards Virat. Her exaggerated sweetness and forced cuteness made his skin crawl, as she continued to bat her eyelashes and pout in Virat's direction, Rohit had fought the urge to roll his eyes in disgust. He could practically feel the insincerity radiating off her forced smiles and exaggerated expressions. It was like witnessing a bad soap opera scene playing out in real life, complete with forced smiles and insincere compliments.

As Nisha leaned in closer to Virat, her actions became increasingly invasive, crossing boundaries that made even Rohit, a bystander, feel uneasy. The way she traced her manicured fingers along Virat's arm seemed to push the limits of what was acceptable, especially considering Virat's evident discomfort. Virat's discomfort became palpable, evident in the subtle shift of his body language and the uneasy expression that flickered across his features. Virat's unease grew with every minute as he attempted to distance himself from her touch, his voice firm, "Don't touch me, Nisha, I have told you before as well, I don't like skin ship. Besides, I am already in a committed relationship. So refrain yourself from touching me."

But Nisha paid no heed to his words, her persistence bordering on insistence. "Oh, Virat, you're such a tease," she persisted, her tone becoming more insistent as she leaned in even closer, her breath tickling his ear.

Virat's frustration mounted as he felt trapped in the uncomfortable situation, his polite refusals falling on deaf ears. Sensing Virat's discomfort, Rohit couldn't help but intervene, his voice tinged with sarcasm as he remarked, "Nisha, I've never seen someone talk so much without actually saying anything of substance." Though his tone was light, there was a subtle warning for Nisha to tone down her overt flirtation with Virat.

Nisha, visibly annoyed, turned her attention to Rohit, dismissing him with a disdainful toss of her hair. "And who asked for your opinion, Rohit? Mind your own business," she retorted, her irritation evident as she redirected her focus to Virat as if Rohit were beneath her notice.

Virat's patience wore thin as he watched Nisha's blatant disregard for Rohit's presence and her persistent attempts to encroach upon his personal space. Virat stepped forward his voice, usually warm and friendly, took on a firm edge as he addressed Nisha directly, "Nisha, enough. You need to respect Rohit and his presence here. I hate it when someone dares to disrespect him, be it behind or in front of me."

As Nisha heard Virat's firm words asserting Rohit's importance, her annoyance surged to new heights. She had hoped that Virat's attention would be solely on her, not divided between her and his friend. Her crush on Virat had blinded her to the importance of their friendship, and now, seeing Virat prioritize Rohit's feelings over her advances, she felt a pang of annoyance. Her gaze narrowed as she processed Virat's words, his declaration of Rohit's significance piercing through her hopes like a sharp arrow. 'How dare he prioritize Rohit over me?' she thought. 'How dare he assert the importance of their friendship in such a public manner, especially in front of me?'

Nisha's irritation simmered beneath the surface as she struggled to maintain her composure. She felt a tinge of jealousy gnawing at her, fueled by Virat's unwavering loyalty to Rohit. Her attempts to gain Virat's attention had backfired spectacularly, leaving her feeling rejected and humiliated. With a forced smile masking her inner turmoil, Nisha forced out a response, her tone tinged with thinly veiled annoyance. "Oh, Vi, so now you are gonna prioritize your little friend over me, is that it? You would rather defend him than indulge in a little harmless flirtation with me? I thought we had something special between us." she said, her voice laced with bitterness.

Virat was already annoyed by Nisha's audacity to flirt with him despite his clear discomfort, and his annoyance fueled more by her disrespectful attitude towards Rohit. Virat's frustration reached its peak as he processed Nisha's words. "Firstly we didn't have anything 'special' going between us, and secondly yes I would happily defend Ro, cause-"

Before Virat could finish his sentence, Nisha interjected, her voice tinged with jealousy and frustration. "Cause, what??"

Virat, clearly frustrated by Nisha's persistent interruptions, blurted out without thinking, "Rohit is my boyfriend."

As the weight of Virat's statement settled over them, the atmosphere in the room shifted palpably. It was as if the air itself had thickened with the unexpected revelation, catching Rohit and Nisha off guard in different ways. Rohit's reaction was almost comical, his reflexive response to Virat's bombshell causing him to nearly choke on his drink. The liquid threatened to spew from his mouth as his eyes widened in astonishment, struggling to reconcile the casual words he had just heard with the reality before him.

Nisha, on the other hand, experienced a swift transition of emotions. Initially irritated by the interruption, her annoyance swiftly gave way to shock as she processed the implications of Virat's confession. Her features contorted in disbelief, her mind struggling to accept what she was hearing.

For Rohit, the moment was a whirlwind of confusion and amusement. His thoughts raced, attempting to grasp the gravity of Virat's words. Had he misheard? Was this some sort of joke? The idea of being referred to as Virat's boyfriend sent his mind reeling, yet a glimmer of amusement danced in his eyes as he considered the absurdity of the situation. As Nisha's disbelief transformed into indignation, her accusatory tone sliced through the tension. "What do you mean, Rohit is your boyfriend?" she demanded, her tone laced with accusation and jealousy.

Virat looked back at Rohit and said, "Come on Nisha, it's true. Rohit and I are in a relationship." His voice was calm but resolute, his eyes meeting Rohit's with a silent plea for urging him to play along.

As Rohit looked at Virat, his initial shock slowly turned into amusement as he realized what Virat had done to handle the situation. With a mix of surprise, amusement, and a mischievous twinkle in his eyes, Rohit decided to play along, with Virat's impromptu declaration. Setting down his drink with deliberate care, trying hard not to laugh, and managed to compose himself enough to respond. "That's right, Nisha. Virat and I are deeply in love," he declared, while Virat leaned in closer to Rohit as if to confirm their supposed relationship.

Rohit couldn't suppress a smirk as he observed the absurdity unfolding before him, finding amusement in Nisha's shifting reactions. Her expression morphed from disbelief to anger, a mix of shock and outrage contorting her features. "This is utterly ridiculous," she sputtered, her voice rising in indignation. "You two are clearly making this up to mock me."

Virat and Rohit exchanged a knowing glance before Rohit addressed Nisha with feigned innocence, "Oh, come on now, we're not. No one enjoys being fake, unlike some humans here."

Still reeling from the bombshell dropped on her, Nisha struggled to control her emotions, eyeing Virat and Rohit with a blend of disbelief and frustration. After a tense silence, she took a deep breath, steeling herself to confront the situation head-on. "Fine, then," she said, her voice trembling slightly with restrained anger. "If what you're saying is true, prove it. Show me evidence that you two are actually in a relationship."

With a smirk playing on his lips, Virat responded to Nisha's challenge, "Oh sure, Nisha. Let me just dig out our relationship contract and a few selfies for your approval. Because clearly, our love needs your validation to exist," he said, rolling his eyes, his frustration at her unreasonable demand evident.

Nisha's frustration boiled beneath the surface, evident in the narrowing of her eyes as she fixed her gaze on Virat and Rohit. Her voice trembled with a mixture of anger and disbelief, the emotions palpable in the room as she confronted them. Arms crossed tightly over her chest, she prepared to challenge their claims, her skepticism hanging thickly in the air like a heavy fog. "Fine, if you're really in a relationship which you guys claim you guys are in," she began, her tone laced with biting sarcasm, "then answer me this: When did you two supposedly meet?" Each word dripped with doubt, daring them to conjure up a convincing response. Nisha's eyes bore into them, her challenging gaze leaving no room for evasion.

Virat and Rohit, unable to meet each other's eyes, responded simultaneously, yet their answers couldn't have been more different.

"Starbucks"

"Airport"

Muttered Virat, and  Rohit in unison.
The discordance between their replies hung in the air, casting a heavy silence over the trio as Nisha's skepticism deepened. With a furrowed brow, Nisha scrutinized their every move, her disbelief palpable in the tension that crackled between them.

Sensing the need to regain control of the situation, Rohit cleared his throat, his voice betraying a hint of unease. "Well, you see, Nisha, it's a bit complicated," he began, his words carefully measured yet tinged with evasion. "We actually met at the Starbucks... um... located... yes located within the Airport."

Nisha looked unconvinced, Virat, sensing her skepticism, interjected hastily, "Yes, and as fate would have it, our eyes locked over a grande latte and..uh.. a misplaced boarding pass."

Still not entirely convinced by their explanation, Nisha arched an eyebrow skeptically before firing off another question, her tone dripping with sarcasm, "Oh, really? And what was your first date like, then?"

Virat, feeling the pressure of Nisha's scrutiny, fidgeted nervously with his fingers, before blurting out, "Our first date... was just your typical romantic evening... at the airport Starbucks... gazing into each other's eyes over ..uh..a cup of lukewarm coffee."

He shot Rohit a sideways glance, silently urging him to play along. Rohit, eager to maintain the facade of their supposed relationship, chimed in quickly, "Yes, and then we strolled hand in hand through... uh... the duty-free shops... bonding over our mutual love for... cologne... um... and oversized Toblerone bars."

Virat nodded eagerly, adding, "And don't forget the unforgettable moment when we..uh... discovered our shared passion... for people-watching at the baggage claim carousel. Truly a memorable night."

As they wove their increasingly absurd tale, Nisha's skepticism only grew, her disbelief etched across her features like a scar. "People-watching at the baggage claim? Really?" she questioned, her incredulity seeping into every word.

Virat and Rohit exchanged nervous glances, their faces flushing with embarrassment as they realized the extent of their improvised storytelling. "Um, well, you see, Nisha, it was a... unique... date experience," Rohit stammered, desperately trying to salvage what little remained of their credibility.

Virat, his voice tinged with desperation, added, "Yes, exactly! Usually, people bond over candlelit dinners and sunset walks on their dates... so... uh... we wanted to do something unique... and we decided... um... to bond over lost luggage and delayed flights?"

Internally, Virat and Rohit both winced and cringed at the absurdity of the situation, at their overly dramatic response, but they couldn't help but play along with the charade to maintain the facade of their supposed relationship. Nisha, now thoroughly unconvinced by their increasingly implausible story, fixed them with a skeptical gaze, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Alright then,looks like you two are really in a relationship," she said, her tone laced with skepticism, "Let us do one last thing. Give me a kiss."

Virat and Rohit exchanged startled glances, their eyes widening in disbelief at Nisha's audacious demand. Rohit felt a surge of panic rising within him, his mind racing to find a way out of the uncomfortable situation. Virat, sensing Rohit's unease, took a step forward, his voice firm yet tinged with desperation. "Nisha, you are crossing a line," he protested, his tone bordering on pleading.

But Nisha remained unmoved, her gaze unwavering as she fixed them with a challenging stare. "Oh, come on," she retorted, her tone taunting, "if you two are really a couple, then a simple kiss shouldn't be a problem, right?"

Rohit felt a bead of sweat trickle down his temple as he struggled to find a way out of Nisha's relentless interrogation. He glanced at Virat, silently pleading for help, but Virat's expression mirrored his own uncertainty. But suddenly Rohit caught sight of a glint in Virat's eyes and accompanied by a mischievous smirk that seemed to play at the corners of his lips, a wave of apprehension washed over him. Having known Virat for half his life, he recognized that whenever that smug smirk appeared, trouble wasn't far behind.

Rohit watched as Virat sighed dramatically and turned his attention towards Nisha, his voice surprisingly calm despite the mischief glinting in his eyes. "Fine, we'll give you what you want," Virat responded, his words tinged with a hint of resignation.

Rohit couldn't help but shoot Virat a worried and horrified glance, silently pleading for him to reconsider whatever scheme he had brewing. Virat, however, seemed thoroughly amused by the unfolding scenario. Suppressing a laugh, he took a deliberate step closer to Rohit, his eyes sparkling with amusement. Leaning in slightly, he whispered to Rohit, "Play along, Ro. We've got this."

Rohit, with a mix of embarrassment and amusement, nodded subtly, trying to maintain his composure. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, as he took a small step toward Virat, placing a hand on his shoulder, and with a dramatic flair, he pretended to draw Virat closer. "Alright, darling," Rohit said in an exaggerated tone, trying to match Virat's teasing demeanor while internally bracing himself for the unknown. Virat, still wearing that mischievous grin, leaned in closer, his face mere inches from Rohit's.

And suddenly Rohit's eyes widened in shock as his lips met Virat's... 

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Hey, Hopefully you guys liked this update. I wrote whatever came in my mind...I might have dramatized few scenes, thanks to my dramatic self lmao. Do let me know your thoughts on this!

PS. Next part is the last part of this mini series, and I will be bringing in Ritsy..so look forward to it guys.

XOXO!

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