Harry's POV:

Even though I had many complications and a lack of time, I finally managed to gel my hair back. After I was done I peered out the window to see London. I wanted to know if El was able to bring everything back in order and if she could get rid of her. I only hoped that she hadn't used my real name, but Louis had been able to talk to her, at least I hoped so, so there wouldn't be any problem at all.

It wasn't a full moon and also it was very late, which didn't turn out to be good for my eye sight. Nevertheless, I immediately recognized London, standing in her long, navy blue coat on my doorstep. The door closed and the brightness, which was caused by the light in my hallway, disappeared. I couldn't judge how she felt now. But something was weird...because she stood there frozen, not moving any muscle, as if someone had just left her standing there  What did El say?

Just as I seemed to be relieved, I started to feel worried about her. In small steps, she moved backwards and finally turned around. I wanted to run after her, now that I was already dressed as Marcel anyway, but I didn't know what Eleanor had told her. As much as I wanted to, I just couldn't .

Suddenly the girl in the long coat turned around for one last time, scanning the house in which I peered anxiously through the window, watching her. She stood with her back to the big street lamp, whose glow cast a shadow on her face, making it impossible for me to see her blue eyes. Damn it !

She tilted her head slightly, apparently she looked up to the second floor, searching for something or someone. Am I this someone? What had El just said to her? I hoped nothing bad. Due to the inclination of her head I could see her eyes better and read the emotions in her facial expression. I felt an unpleasant feeling in my stomach, as her sad eyes scanned the facade of the building. But when her gaze fell on me, my heart almost stopped beating. She looked so...hurt...almost helplessly. What had Eleanor said to her ?

Out of nowhere Louis' girlfriend stormed inside my bedroom, turning on the lights. I spun around, as I saw her shocked face. She wanted to laugh, but my serious face told her that I wasn't in the mood.

"H-Harry ... or whoever you are now, I did a mistake ... I'm so sorry ! " At these words, my mood changed immediately,  concern became anger.

"What the hell did you tell her ?" I gritted my teeth, growling.

"I'm so sorry, " She had to smile slightly. I knew she wasn't laughing at the situations, but because of my super trendy outfit, but I didn't care.

"What did you tell her ?" My voice was getting louder each time.

"I used your real name, I'm sorry, I didn't know anything about your disguise, but Louis saved the situation ... so I could tell London a lie... "

"What did you tell her ?" Now it was a low, almost frightening whisper.

"That you weren't home already ," she murmured, looking at the floor.

" Fuck! " I scolded. "Fuck, El !"

"What? I'm Sorry I didn't know what lie I should use instead! " She groused, crossing her arms in front of her chest .

"Fuck !" I screamed, but my voice cracked. "She saw me... " I finally muttered.

I immediately turned around again, but London was gone. Under the street light was nothing to watch except the footpath which crumbled in some places. My fist landed with full force on the window sill, as I could no longer hold back my aggression and anger. What does she think of me, Marcel, now?

"What did she said after you said my name?" I asked the nervous women, who was still standing behind me at the door frame of my bedroom.

"She was confused ... I told her that it's your nickname and that we're sometimes calling you 'Harry'. I also told her that I would tell you that she was here as soon as you get back home, " Eleanor explained, but that made everything even worse.

"Fuck!" This evening was one of those, where I had cursed the most ... because I hadn't for months.

I squeezed my eyes tightly and took a deep breath, then I focused back on El, approaching her.

"It's not your fault , " I muttered and walked past her.

As fast as I could, I stumbled down the stairs and hadn't even enough time to slip into my shoes. Louis apparently knew what would happen and had already prepared my Chucks, holding them in his hands, as he waited at the front door for me. I took them out of his hands and didn't really care that they didn't fit my nerdy outfit at all. He scanned my whole body, smirking slighty. I gave him a dismissive look...why did he knew what would happen? Okay, you could guess, but at that moment I was just so angry at Eleanor, Louis and angry of myself. Why do I have to be famous?

Fucking Harry Styles, fucking Marcel. 

Who am I at all? I can't even treat a girl right, or tell her the truth about me, yet don't want to tell her who I am...This is so wrong...everything about me is so wrong. 

Without saying a word, I ran out of the house on the street and in the direction in which I had seen London going. Luckily, jogging and running on the treadmill had finally paid off. With a goal in mind, I ran as fast as I could, only one thing in mind; to find London. What does she think about me and Eleanor now? Even though I was a nerd, and yes, Eleanor was a pretty woman, that wasn't a reason for London to think that El and I weren't falling for each other. I knew her pretty good, she would think the worst.

That thought burned into my brain and wouldn't leave me alone. How much I must have hurt London. I didn't know if she liked me as much as I did, but after I saw her face, I was sure that she felt the same. Everything was so complicated. You meet a person in your life who gets in top speed a place in your heart, but doesn't know who you really are. I had always seen it as an advantage ... I was aware that London liked me because of my inside values, she had just brought back to the surface. But now it was one of the biggest drawbacks and like a cage for me, of wich I held the key tightly in my hands, but didn't even dare to move them, because I was too afraid of what would await me there.

With me thinking about those ocean blue eyes that always conjured a smile on my face, I rushed down the road. I had to meet her sooner or later. To judge by the PE lessons we had together, she wasn't the fastest runner, and there were only a few roads til I would reach her house. It was the first time that I liked the fact that her parents had a house in the rich neighborhood, so I didn't have to run that far.

C'mon London! Where are you !

Shortly before her house I then stopped. I had given up my hope to find her on the streets and wanted to take the plunge and ring the doorbell. I needed to talk to her about it. Eleanor wasn't my girlfriend. And if that's what you want, not my sexual relationship or toy, I would use if I was in the mood to play, as well. No, I would never do something like that to El, not to forget that she was Louis' girlfriend and he happened to be my best mate. In addition, those days were over anyway in which I had taken strangers back home to have a little fun with some women. This was over, since I met London. It didn't happen that often...maybe two or three times, but I still had this phase and the urge to take all the girls home. Fortunately I didn't...

Before I could walk any further towards the door, I heard deep sobs that made ​​my heart break. I knew that it was London. She hadn't made it inside her house. I took a few steps along the wall and saw her sitting around the corner on one of the deck chairs. She sat there huddled, with her ​​knees pulled up close to her chest and face hidden behind her hands. If I wouldn't have been in love with her, then I would have been mad at the guy who did this to her. But one way or another, I hated him anyways. Because I was mad at myself and hated it to be the reason for her crying.

Reluctantly, I put one foot in front of the other and approached her. She was crying too much that she couldn't notice me coming. A few feet away, I raised my right hand and grabbed my glasses, which slowly slipped from my nose and I finally deposed them. With the last steps London noticed me, slowly lifting her head. She had probably expected her parents, because she only needed to see my vest, to let her head sink into her hands again. I was least expected, or she may just didn't want to see me. I understood that. But yet I didn't want to give up.

I carefully sat down beside her on the chair and fumbled with the glasses in my hands. London's sobs became less, but still it didn't stop. I bit my lip and clenched my fists. I was so angry that I didn't even notice that I had broken my glasses. The glass shattered into thousands of small pieces, some of them digging into my skin, some just falling into the grass. The frame was twisted and from the moment on unusable. My eyes followed the individual drops of blood wich trickled down my wrist, then I inhaled a sharp breath.

"I'm sorry," I muttered, but my voice was so quiet that I couldn't even hear myself.

London didn't move any inch.

"I'm sorry, London, " I repeated myself, this time a bit louder.

"I heard you, Marcel," she mumbled, and I wasn't sure if I was relieved that she called me Marcel, or more angry at myself that I had let it come so far that she was ignoring me.

"Listen ... London, please," I begged and turned my head in her direction.

"I don't want you to see me like this," she whispered, trying to suppress more tears.

"I've already seen you like this, you remember, I was there for you, " I said and put a comforting arm around her.

Luckily, she didn't back away or hit it away, because this would have given me the rest.

"Yeah, I remember, and now you're the reason why I have to ... to ..." Her voice faded .

".... cry ?" I whispered, feeling the hurt inside my voice.

I had made ​​her cry.

She just nodded and continued hiding her pretty face.

"I'm sorry, London, I really am ... " I took another deep breath. "Eleanor is not my girlfriend."

Her previous trembling body held still for a moment. I pressed her closer to me, although I felt that she wanted to avoid that. But I couldn't help it, I had to feel her. I just had to.

"Is she your cousin ?" London suddenly muttered. I was happy to hear her soothing, yet vulnerable voice.

"No ... " I answered.

"Then I do not believe you, sorry. "

"Hey, babe, there's no reason for you to apologize ... I'm the dickhead, I understand. I-I .. can I just ask you one question ?" My heart started beating faster with each second, my hands were shaking and my voice was anything but powerful. "Please, look me in the eyes while I'm asking you. "

I left her a little slack so she could lift her head, but she didn't.

"Please , " I repeated myself.

Finally, she did what I asked and looked at me with her bloodshot, ocean blue eyes. Only the sight made me feel a widespread feeling of self-hatred inside of me, that I wanted to just tell her everything. But I couldn't. Not yet.

"W-what is it ? " Her lip trembled as she tried to form a sentence.

It didn't seem to be particularly important to her that I hadn't my glasses on my nose, but I noticed that she had discovered my wounds. However, it was better for me that she didn't mention them.

I swallowed hard and reached with my injured hand to her trembling little hands that fit easily into one of mine. She allowed it.

"Do you know how it feels to love someone? That you only need to see the person and your stomach starts to flip around like crazy? " Now it was my voice that trembled with fear. I had never said this to a girl before.

"Those were two questions ... but yeah, I know this feeling, that's why I am crying right now, you know. " It was like a slap in the face.

"Sorry ..." I couldn't stop apologizing. I had done so many bad things... "But there's one more thing..."

I expected her to ignore me...but she didn't.

"Keep going," she muttered, but focused her eyes on the broken glass in between the leaves of grass.

"Sometimes ... you can't tell the person you love, who you really are. It could frighten them or make them back away ... and I'm one of those jerks, who can't tell the one I love ...who I am...because I don't want this person to back away...I want this person by my side. "

Her desperate eyes met mine. She looked almost shocked ... I felt so bad...and sick... I wanted to get rid of it, but I couldn't. In a few weeks it would be the right time, but right now I had to deal to convey indirectly to London that I wasn't the one that I pretended to be.

"London, I love you and I don't want you to leave me." 

___________

My favourite chapter:) Hope you liked it! This was a long chapter as a thank you for more than 100k reads so far.x Please vote/share/comment! 

QUESTIONS:

- WHERE ARE YOU FROM7WHERE DO YOU LIVE? (I want to know more bout my readers)

- ANY SHIP NAMES FOR LONDON & HARRY/MARCEL?x

-Nikolina.x