How biased life is, a man who doesn't have any good intentions to live the life he got has everything that one could wish for. If he was normal like me and everyone else, how peaceful our life would be? I thought sitting at the empty poolside.

Heaving a sigh, I looked at the sky. It's warm and cold, the sound of the crow is heard at the distance, and the smell of wet sand blended in the air. I felt calm yet I am the most disturbed person here.

It's been a week since I came back here, I stayed in my house for two days, I would have stayed longer or even forever if Vijay wasn't come there to get me. Though he asked me to stay as long as I want, he came on the second day itself requesting me to come with him. I don't want to go yet I have to go. Like a five-year-old child who's afraid to go to school, I bid goodbyes to my father and got inside the car.

My father doesn't have anything to say. He's more confused than me or is he quiet because he's guilt? I am searching for an explanation for why suddenly people in my life were acting this way or is this the point where I can see their true selves?
It hurts to know that no one is by my side.

Vijay, he doesn't care about what I am going through right now and goes to work every day like he's going to do cook for everyone. What kind of man he is? Before I feLt bad when we don't talk with each other but now, it's so good. I stopped worrying about him and I couldn't look at him in his face. That compassion I had is nowhere in my heart and all I could think is, if I get a chance I may leave him. That's constantly ringing in my head.

Because as I rewind the past months, he has never been genuinely nice to me. He showed it only to silence my doubts.

I can forget everything and resume to the place where everything went wrong if he is honest with me and to share what he actually has in his mind. Because of this everything we shared in the past months, feels like they were all fake.

I huffed and laid on the grass. Even if I try, I couldn't make peace with what I have and what I don't have.

"Aarthi?" Vijay's voice startled me and I sat up.

He walked towards me like he's going to talk something and I avoided facing his deceitful face which he carries without any shame.

"Are you feeling better today?" he asked sitting next to me.

I gritted and didn't answer him. He took my hand and gained my attention.

"I know you must be, in my absence," he answered.

"Why can't you just leave me alone?" I scowled, "I hate when you talk like this, can't you just be normal?" I asked.

"I know you don't care about me," I muttered at last.

"I agree that I don't care about anything that comes along with you but I care about you," he gave a definite answer that he cares me like I am an object but not as a human –as his wife.

"Why you're so unkind? I don't know why you even agreed to marry me?" I chuckled.

"I know, I made a wrong choice but I really like you and I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life."

"Please, stop hating me and be normal like how we used to be," he mumbled in remorse.

I took my hand gazing his face. A sane person can never believe this act of him.

"Normal? We never lived normal," I said looking away.

"Whatever," he sighed when his act doesn't work out with me today.

"I am going to Chennai in tonight train and it will take three or four days for me to return," he informed.

"Stay in home until then," he added,

"Why?" I asked because I still care.

"I usually visit that branch every month but it's been so long since I went there," he answered.

I nodded, thinking why he didn't ask me to come along with him?

"I am going to pack my bag; can I get a coffee?" he got up and I nodded.

I prepared him a nice cup of coffee feeling so happy that he won't be around me. Oh God, why I am starting to hate him?

When I walked inside, he was sitting on the bed and checking my phone instead of packing his stuff.

"What you're doing?"

"Just looking at our pictures," he showed the display, "You look beautiful in this photo,"

Either he honestly says that or not, I can't help but feel guilty that I am hurting him, I have never done that to anyone and I feel bad for showing my rebuff.

"I look the same in all pictures," I still showed that anger and placed the coffee cup on the table.
"Pack your bag, instead of checking my phone," I frowned before coming to the entrance of the house.

I watered the plants and cleaned the soil which was left careless for a week. He placed money on the table when I came back to the house.

After briefly gazing at my face he asked, "Do you want to come along with me?"

"No thanks, since you have already planned then why you're changing that in the last moment?" I sarcastically remarked.

But I was surprised that he didn't show his anger for talking this way. He's silent which scares me wondering when he's going to turn mad.

He sighed. "What you want from me?"

"Honesty. Compassion and some true affection, can you give that?" I gave my honest answer.

He stared my face blankly like he doesn't know the meaning of those words.

"I showed everything but that's not enough for you," he countered.

"Yes, because I am hurt, and you didn't care about it,"

"As I said in the starting, I am not like anyone else, I grew up this way and I can't change it."

"So what we were going to do then?"

"Everything will turn back to normal if you let go of this matter. We can have children when the right time comes," he said that same dialogue and I rolled my eyes. I thought it's a waste to continue the conversation with a man who doesn't understand what I want. He's thinking as everyone will be like him.

He came closer and leaned to kiss me but I averted it in repulsion. Vijay stared at me intently.
"At last, you also started hating me," he smiled and walked carrying his bag. I stood there watching him leaving in his car.

Should I have to leave this matter as nothing? Why I couldn't stop my fears clouding up in my head? I asked myself stumbling on the steps.

That night, I watched three movies simultaneously and slept on the couch itself as I felt afraid to go upstairs. I woke up very late the next morning with the sound of rain peering through the windows. Lazily finishing off my morning chores, I made tea and walked to open the door with my phone after seeing a missed call from Vijay.

I called him and he said, he's in a hotel room. He then said his grandpa invited me to his house and Vijay asked me to go there tomorrow and I agreed. We didn't carry on the conversation further and ended it in a minute.

I again turned on the television and prepared some toast for breakfast. In the afternoon, the rain poured heavily. The plants were washed off from the dirt and were dazzling in an untainted green. I sat on the steps and watched it with a smile.

Maybe one day, everything is going to be alright.