She's left him. She took everything from him- his family, his life, his childhood. She took it all like a thief in the night. She took it all with him staring right at her. He can see her smile every time he closes his eyes, and he feels her eyes on him no matter where he goes. Her hands claw at his ears until he can't hear anything but her. She's gone, but he can still feel her all around him. She is still controlling his life. The thought that someone is there should be comforting, but he still feels so Primedamn alone.

And he is. He broke every relationship he's ever had. He's hurt every person he's ever cared about, and everyone who once cared about him has rightfully deserted him. He's alone and he deserves it and he knows that. So why does his heart hurt? Why does he feel like he's drowning in loneliness like an unprepared adventurer drowns in quicksand? Why does he feel like the entire world is weighing down on him when he's technically gotten rid of all his responsibilities?

She's left him, and so has everyone else. He made them leave. He didn't stop pressing buttons and pushing people too far until they actually snapped and did what he wanted them to do.

She's left him because she knows that she's won. He won't be going back to the heroes. He won't be returning as Vermillion. He won't have anyone but her. He won't have anyone but her organization.

She's left him, but he has a job. He closes his eyes, and instead of her smirk, he sees Sam's patient smile. When he whirls around, instead of her standing behind him, he sees Mamacita waving at him before she continues with her job. Instead of her nails digging into his skin, he feels MD throw an arm around his shoulders. Instead of hearing her voice, he catches the brief whispers that fall from Nook's normally silent lips. He has people now. All he has to do is hold on to them. He can't abandon them. He can't go through that again. He's tired of being alone.

"Vermillion? Are you awake now?" Vermillion opens his eyes. Someone is staring down at him. Sam is looking down at him. He's smiling softly, a hand going through Vermillion's hair. He tilts his head to the side, and he asks, "How did you sleep?"

"Fuck," Vermillion whispers, running a hand over his face. He readjusts his mask as he sits up. His sleep wasn't that awful. He takes what he can get, after all. But his dream was weird. It wasn't that straightforward. It wasn't a succession of memories, more like general thoughts and feelings from his past. They solidify in his mind slowly, and he resists the urge to laugh. He had promised himself that he wouldn't abandon the new people in his civilian life. He wouldn't let them leave him, either. He broke yet another promise. He should stop making promises. He is shit at keeping them.

"Maybe some food will make you feel better," Mamacita calls out. She's standing over a pot on the portable stove. The cupboards creak as she opens one. She doesn't hesitate to pile something yellow on the plate. As she comes closer, Vermillion realizes that she's made him mac and cheese. She sets the plate down on the coffee table, right beside Sam who has decided that the table made a better seat than an actual chair. Mamacita rushes back to the kitchenette area, and Vermillion watches as she gets him a water bottle from the mini-fridge. When Mamacita returns, she stands patiently at the edge of the coffee table.

Vermillion closes his eyes. He's had rest, but some part of him is still overwhelmingly tired. He wants to go back to his apartment. He wants to go back to taking naps in Banshee's room as he plays the guitar or crashing in Beau's dorm after a long but fulfilling mission. He can't have either of those things back. He doesn't know where Beau is, and he's already abandoned Siren so many times. He's been responsible for Siren almost losing his life twice already.

And MD is missing. Mamacita told him the day (?) prior that Clara had taken MD in order to bait Vermillion out. Vermillion had to go after MD as soon as possible. He doesn't think that Clara will kill MD, but she would treat him with any level of respect. MD was merely a hostage to her, a bargaining chip at best. To add insult to injury, he was a human. Clara despised humans, and that was evidently clear by the way she was running Apex. Vermillion might be able to save MD's life, but if he didn't go now, he isn't sure he'll be able to fully save MD. When a mind breaks, some shards are left behind.

"We'll let you eat," Sam promises. Vermillion's eyes snap open. Sam is holding the door open, and Vermillion didn't even realize he had moved. Mamacita hesitates, but she ultimately walks out of the room. Sam closes the door behind them. Vermillion is alone without their company. He wants to beg them to come back, but his stomach rumbles with enough force that he's uncertain if it wants to eat or send puke up his throat. He doesn't want to be alone anymore, but what can he expect when he's always hiding?

Vermillion removes his mask. He takes a shaky breath as freezing cold air rushes into his mouth and settles along his sweaty skin. It's been a long time since he's been Tommy, he realizes. For the past few days, he has been rushing around as Vermillion to clean up Apex. Any moment he was resting was permeated with other heroes. He can't reveal to them who he is. Yumi might have told Hannah and the other kids he saved who he was under the mask, but he couldn't let anyone else find out. He wanted to keep both of his lives separate.

Tommy was special. He was unafraid of anything. He was allowed to laugh without any care. He was allowed to enjoy anything he wanted in life without considering the consequences. He didn't need anybody. He thrived when he was alone.

It was Vermillion that needed his family. It was Theseus that couldn't stand being alone. It was everyone Tommy left behind that was always filled with so much fear and responsibility.

Tommy sighed as he started eating his mac and cheese. It tasted weird, too much powder and too little water and it hadn't been boiled long enough. Regardless, it was food. It was food that Mamacita herself had made for him. It was food that Sam and Mamacita had respected his privacy so he could eat it. Tommy didn't care what it tasted like as long as it made the rumbling in his stomach stop. He had enough pain in his body and soul and mind to deal with. His organs needed to wait their turn until he was done with Apex and the stupid power inside his body.

He didn't realize how hungry he was. His plate was empty within seconds, and Tommy felt his chest burn at how fast he ate. He downed half his water bottle to settle his chest, but he was still hungry. He left his plate and water bottle on the coffee table as he marched over to the pot on the portable stove with his fork. Tommy was someone who didn't care about other people, so he just ate the rest of the mac and cheese straight out of the pot. It was still foul-tasting, but it was somehow made better by the fact that he was just eating out of the pot itself. There was something about simple rebellion that soothed his aching soul.

When the pot was empty, he pushed it into the sink and turned the burner off. He didn't wash the dishes, though, because the only place Tommy was going to do chores was his own apartment. And when he put the mask back on his face, Vermillion had bigger fish to fry than a single pot. He trashed the plastic plate and carried the water bottle with him. He pushed down the door handle and kicked the door the rest of the way open. He caught the door handle before it could slam against the wall. He closed the door, turning towards the direction that he suspected Sam and Mamacita went.

He froze immediately. Other people were in the hallway. One of them was leaning against the wall. He was wearing an orange and white suit with a fan of fox tails spread out behind his mask. A fox mask was positioned across his face but even the long shadow of the noise couldn't hide the smirk Kitsune was wearing. The other was standing in the center of the hallway. They were wearing ceremonial armor underneath a billowing, fur-lined red cape. A crown was placed on their brown locks, and their eyes were covered by a black blindfold. Monarch came to attention as they noticed Vermillion standing there.

"What the hell are you two doing here?" Vermillion whispers. He knows both of them. Kitsune was one of the heroes who guarded over L'Manberg district a while back, and Monarch did a lot of work with Captain. Vermillion has met them personally several times. It was difficult to avoid them when Vermillion had been frequenting the association a lot. Kitsune was good friends with Nemesis, Blaze, and Siren. Everyone respected Monarch.

"You didn't think we'd let you do this on your own, did you?" Kitsune laughs as he talks. He kicks off the walls, and he's suddenly in front of Vermillion. He's closer than proper respect would allow, but Vermillion doesn't push him away. He just stares into the slitted yellow eyes peering at him curiously.

"We're good at hostage situations, and you will need my access to legally get out of the districts," Monarch states simply. Vermillion looks away from Kitsune. Monarch is keeping his distance from Vermillion, and it isn't hard to understand why. When Vermillion destroyed all of his relationships, he made sure to be thorough. He wanted them all to hate him. He thought that simply avoiding Monarch would be fine, but then the hero had sought Vermillion out to ask him about his behavior. He was just like everyone else- far too kind to a vigilante that was destroying his relationships. That was the last conversations Monarch and Vermillion ever had, and there was nothing good or kind about it. Vermillion could only take some consolation in the fact that Monarch said just as many hurtful things to Vermillion as was said about them; albeit, Vermillion did start the argument, so that fact was usually obsolete.

"I guess. Just don't make the situation worse," Vermillion tells them with a shrug, avoiding both of their eyes. Monarch nods slowly, and Kitsune disappears from Vermillion's field of vision. Vermillion whirls around in time to see Kitsune reappear in front of Sam and Mamacita. The two of them seemed to have heard the talking and were coming to investigate. Mamacita glances at the heroes wearily, but Sam sighs in relief when he sees them.

"We should leave soon," Mamacita tells them. Vermillion stares at her for a long moment. She seems determined with fists at her sides and a hardened glint in her eye. Vermillion doesn't want to bring her. She'll be in the way at best, and at worst, Clara will kidnap her to force Vermillion's hand.

Vermillion opens his mouth to argue, but he feels a pair of arms around him. He blinks in surprise before realizing that Sam is hugging him. "Be safe, Vermillion."

The hug is warm and secure, satisfying some itch in Vermillion's mind. The problem is that this isn't the expected reaction. Sam only knows Vermillion from the news, and Vermillion has never met Sam. Beneath the mask, Tommy knows Sam, but Sam couldn't know who was underneath the mask. Sam shouldn't care about the vigilante of another district so much that his voice sounded that pained. Vermillion hugs back because he's desperate for it, but he doesn't understand until Sam pulls back slightly. He presses his forehead against Vermillion's forehead in the same way that the Captain does for the people she cares about. Vermillion almost laughs at the similarity until he hears Sam whisper, "And please come back to us, Tommy. Don't run away again."

Vermillion chokes on his breath. He's going to puke or cry or possibly both. He backs away from Sam, nearly jerking out of his hold. Sam doesn't seem surprised nor does he feign being upset. He just smiles sadly at Vermillion. Before the vigilante can voice any of his thoughts, Sam has turned away to give his regards to Mamacita. Vermillion lifts his head to reach out for Sam, but his fingers close into a fist instead. He feels a weight on his shoulder. He whips his head around to see Monarch looking at him. He squeezes Vermillion's shoulder once and asks, "Are you okay?"

No, he isn't. What about him makes anyone think that he's okay? He has a deadly power festering uncontrollably in his body. He has a family that wants him back because they don't know what he's capable of. He has a shitty childhood that keeps coming back to bite him in the butt. He has so many broken promises littered around his feat that he feels like a category 5 hurricane. Sam knows his identity, and bad enough, Sam expects Vermillion- for Tommy- to return. He wasn't planning on doing that, and what person who is okay thinks about that?

"Fine. Let's fucking go," Vermillion grits out. He turns away from all of them. He starts walking down the hallway towards the exit he knows about. He hears everyone shuffling around to accommodate his faster pace. He feels a swish beside him, but he doesn't see Kitsune until the hero is at the end of the hall, holding the door open. Monarch's measured footfalls echo right behind Vermillion, and he can barely hear Mamacita's graceful steps. Sam remains behind. He calls out to them one more time, but Vermillion can't look behind him.

Vermillion steps out into the night. The wind blows immediately, informing him that it has returned to him. Vermillion wishes he were traveling alone. He could just use the wind to jump over the walls. It would take some time walking to get to the base from the outer wall of the districts, but Vermillion would make it. He instinctively knew how to get to Apex's headquarters, mainly because something that Vermillion's powers were linked to were still out there.

"We brought a car!" Kitsune calls out happily. He disappears and reappears at the driver side door of a slick, black car. Kitsune leans against the car with a cheeky smile on his face. He raises his hand up, but nothing happens.

"You are not driving," Monarch tells him. Monarch walks to the driver's side door. He gently nudges Kitsune out of the way. Monarch gets into the driver's seat. Kitsune pouts beneath his mask before snapping to attention. He disappears, and when he reappears again, he's in front of the passenger side door. He glares at Vermillion and Mamacita before yelling out, "I call shotgun!"

He disappears, but the door to the car opens. Kitsune doesn't reappear until the door is slammed shut. Vermillion rolls his eyes, sliding into the backseat behind Monarch. Mamacita sits behind Kitsune. When everyone is in the car, Monarch twists the keys to the engine. The car roars to life, and they start pulling into the street. Vermillion looks out the window to see Sam standing at the doorway of the bank's back exit. Sam smiles sadly, and Vermillion forces himself to look away.

He doesn't want to be alone, so why does he always end up that way?