Old Frenemies
Po and Zhen still had to make the chasing trek down the mountainscape, which made Po even more exhausted than he already was, but soon the two had reached the outskirts of the city. By the time they reached the main road however, it was nearly dusk and Po's stomach was singing a dirge in the hopes of being fed.
"I don't suppose you know any good places to recommend for dinner?" he asked.
Zhen thought for a moment. Then smiled. "I do!" she admitted. She grabbed Po's hand and started to drag him away from the city towards one of the hills that was close by. Po lamented having to walk back uphill, but Zhen promised the path wasn't as steep up there. She offered to carry Po's backpack if it got too heavy, but Po promised he could handle it. Finally the two reached the top, coming across an old looking tavern that had exuberant laughter coming from within as well as lively music.
"Ooh!" Po exclaimed. "They sound nice."
"Yeah, I haven't been here in years. Hope the owner is still friendly."
Po eyed her. "Why wouldn't they be?" he asked.
Zhen didn't answer him and threw open the doors where Po was greeted by the sight of many board, wolves, crocodiles, bunnies, and a bunch of other patrons Po couldn't see very well. Upon hearing them intrude, a few faces closest to the door turned their heads to see the new intruders. Some of them didn't pay much mind, but one or two got up and immediately headed over to the other side of the room, disappearing into the crowd.
"I'm digging the smells!" Po told Zhen. "What kind of food do they have in here?"
"Any you can think of. Except for tom yum soup. I wouldn't recommend that."
The two made their way through the crowd and towards the back counter where Zhen flagged the cook and order her and Po some dumplings, soup, rice, and some mapo tofu. Po had never heard of it, but the smirk from Zhen and the insistence he tried told him it wasn't a food that might agree with him. But he was definitely trying it anyway. He liked new food. As the cook headed back to the kitchen, the two heard a sword unsheathe and suddenly the entire tavern went quiet.
"You have a lot of nerve coming back here," came a gruff voice from down below.
Zhen and Po slowly turned around and spotted a small dark shelled armadillo aiming a sword at them. "Who's the new clan buddy, Zhen?" he asked fiercely.
"Uh, I think there's been a misunderstanding," Po told him. "I'm..."
"Hey San," Zhen interrupted, slowly getting down from her seat. "Long time no see. This is my friend, Master Po. Po this is San. We're old buddies, right?"
"Yeah. Buddies. Buddies who rob each other by cheating at mahjong if that's what you mean!"
"Wait, what?!" Po exclaimed.
Zhen rolled her eyes. "I gotta' reputation here, Po, remember?" she reminded him. "I ain't all sunshine an' cuddles."
Sam stepped forward and slammed the sword he had against Zhen's throat and into the counter. "I want my money," he seethed.
"Kinda' dry right now, pal," Zhen sputtered weakly. She tried to gently push the sword off her throat, but San pushed back even harder.
"Maybe I can help?" Po called over, hoping to ease the tension. "How much does she owe you?"
"7,233,100 yuan. And fifteen fen."
Po blinked in surprise and then looked back at Zhen. "How many mahjong games did you play with him?!" he exclaimed.
Zhen thought for a second. "Four if we're counting the party at Farmer's Field," she recounted.
"I ain't doing this to be funny, you slippery yellow-bellied miscreant!"
"Look, San, I'm turning' over a new leaf. Can't we just do an IOU and rain check later? Maybe do a payment plan or somethin'?
"Nice try, but that kinda' shmancy paperwork crap don't work here and you know it."
Zhen shrugged. "Well, worth a shot," she said.
"This would have been nice to know before we got here, you know," Po said as their food finally reached the counter.
"Okay, are you gonna' help me or are ya' just gonna' sit there and watch me get cut up?"
Po tossed a dumpling into his mouth and got up from his chair with a sigh. "Look, sir," he told San firmly. "You're gonna' have to do this later. Zhen and I didn't come here to settle old debts. And we're kinda' on a time crunch right now. Why don't you just work something out-"
"Shut it, panda!" San snapped and swung the sword on the counter in his direction as a deterrent to keep away. Po grabbed it however and wound up kicking him across the restaurant, which had everyone attention. A couple of people laughed, some oohed, and others started chanting for a fight.
"We didn't come here to cause trouble!" Po pleaded but San had already come back for round two and took out even more swords that he had stashed.
"How many of those do you carry?!" Po cried.
"Enough to be your worst nightmare!" San yelled. He threw a knife at Zhen who ducked and then grabbed a handful of spices from the counter and threw it into the man's face. As he screamed and went running for water, several more patrons began to throw things and start their own brawls.
"Man I missed this!" Zhen exclaimed gleefully.
"Uh, when we agreed to stop Chameleon," Po told her, watching a couple of people approach them with swords and clubs. "A bar fight was not on my to-do list!"
"Little late for that," Zhen told him with a laugh. "Now it's join in or get thrown out without dinner." She immediately ran towards the large crowd, taking a stool with her to use in combat.
Po wasn't remotely thrilled about the whole bar dinner-fight situation, but with a bunch of strangers charging at him hoping for a good hit and a loud growl from his stomach, Po quickly got invested in landing several kicks and punches and then immediately going back to stuffing his face with food.
"Man, this is really good!" he remarked. However, he was quickly interrupted by more patrons charging at him. Some swing swords, some fans, and some carried their own shoes as weapons. Po had to give credit that they were a tough ragtag bunch. He figured this must be a regular occurrence, something Zhen probably enjoyed. Not so much him.
Zhen in the meantime was busy swinging around the pillars holding the roof up and tossing bowls into people's faces and using her new skills to kick them across the tavern. A few patrons threw some swords at her, getting them stuck in the wall next to her, but she quickly pulled the handle back with her feet and allowed good old fashioned physics to launch the sword at the crowd, causing a few to fall backwards to avoid getting hit. Po in the meantime got swarmed by a large crowd and managed to push them off and swirl his chi staff around to knock everyone back with a large chi blast. This finally caused most of the people to get the hint and return to their tables, though some of them headed over to the other side of the tavern to continue on with fighting. Po tried to make his way over and help Zhen and calm the crowd down, but he was suddenly attacked by San who had been biding his time and didn't seem phased by Po. Unable to use a blast in time, Po simply blocked the incoming sword with his staff. He tried to get Sam to let go or even just kick the guy away, but all his efforts proved fruitless.
"You're new around here, ain't ya' tubby?" San noted, trying to push past the block.
"Yeah, I am!" Po agreed, gritting his teeth against the other force. "Look, Zhen and I didn't come here to cause trouble! We're just trying to take down the Chameleon!"
San's eyes widened in shock. "THE CHAMELEON?!" he shouted loudly.
Almost everyone in the bar stopped fighting at the mention of the name. Zhen threw a chair in someone's face for good measure. San released Po from their block and stepped back a bit, still surprised. Po looked from him to the customers and then back to San. "Did I say something wrong?" he asked worriedly.
"You're taking your butt against The Chameleon?!" San repeated. "You must have a death wish or somethin' panda!"
"I'm trying to stop her from hurting people," Po explained. "I don't care if I have to die in order to give everyone some relief."
San kept looking at him but then laughed. "Well you're certainly braver than everyone else!" he admitted. He glanced over at Zhen and called out, "How much did you have to pay him to get rid of her?"
Zhen colored in embarrassment. "I didn't pay him anything!" she protested. "We're going together!"
"You're going with him? After you got THAT ugly mug?! After all the years of slinking around in underground caverns and homes when you so much as saw her shadow? After leaving because the anxiety was too much to bear? Now you want to go for round two?"
Po looked at Zhen. "What is he talking about?" he asked.
Zhen paled. "Uh....I...well, I told you I met her before. Nobody around here likes her."
"Yeah, especially Miss Shadow Ducker," San mocked with a laugh.
"Hey listen buddy, I ain't completely reformed just yet!" Zhen warned threateningly. "So you better hold your tongue before I do it for you!"
"Hey, ease up there! Both of you!" Po scolded. "Look, obviously everybody here has an issue with this Chameleon lady. Zhen has her problems, she's attacked our friends, and obviously she's hurt a lot of you guys."
Low murmurs of agreement rang out along with someone banging their head on the table and gently sobbing.
"If there's one thing I've learned, it's that any problem can be solved working together. None of us could beat her on our own, and people we love have gotten hurt because of that. But imagine if we all worked together? You guys are a tough bunch. If you can almost take down a kung fu master with a chi staff, imagine what we could do with a solid plan!"
There were some reluctant murmurs, which disheartened Po a bit, but San let out a thoughtful "hmm" and then said, "you know what panda? I can humor you if it means getting some peace of mind. All or nothing, right?"
A few patrons still looked reluctant, but another one chimed in with the same opinion and soon the enthusiasm made its way around the tavern and Po and Zhen found themselves with a very vengeful ragtag wannabe army.
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