I guess things started getting ugly when we began taking desperate measures. Desperate measures to be accepted, to be seen, to be loved, to be on top.

Like I said before, no one in this story is innocent. No one is completely without wrong.

In our story, saints and sinners were one and the same.

◈ ━━━━━━━ ⸙ - ⸙ ━━━━━━━ ◈

Amira was one the people who had run over to see what was actually happening and she had also been among the people who watched in awe as her brother stormed out with Tari as if she was his prized possession.

In all honesty, she didn't know how to feel about that. It always took her time to realize how she felt about certain things. And although she didn't know how to feel, she already had an idea of what she would arrive at.

She simply hoped that whatever feeling that she would arrive at wouldn't cost her Tari's friendship which seemed to already be on a thin line.

Tari was angry with her. Did she have the right to be? Probably.

She had wanted to win the debate by all means, true. But at a point, it became about making her friend feel guilty.

"Okay, everybody, gather around, let's practice this one more time before we call it a day," Zehan could be heard shouting, trying to get everyone's attention back to the relay race at hand. "The girls will go first. Two teams, four runners on both teams, let's go!"

Amira soon found herself in the same team with Kasy and two other girls from the Art Class. She didn't take note of the runners on the other team until she was on her mark. She was the last runner on the track, meaning she would finish the race.

She took in deep breaths and did mini warm-ups on the spot.

"Remember, you don't start running until the baton is in your hands. The baton falls, you can pick it up or give up," said Zehan, walking round to make sure all the racers were on their marks. "On your marks!" he yelled at the two girls starting the race. They bent down, placing fingers on their marks and holding the white batons tightly. "Get set!" They positioned properly to take off.

Amira could hear the beating of her own heart in her ears.

"Ready?" Zehan yelled even louder and the girls seemed like they were already running the race in their head.

The sound of the whistle and the racers ran like people being chased by mountain lions.

The second set of runners turned to face the incoming runners, stretching their hands to grab the baton and hopping on their feet agitatedly as they got ready to continue the race.

The baton was passed at once and it seemed the two teams were running in sequence to meet the third runners. Kasy was hundred meters away from Amira but Amira could see her anticipating the baton.

The baton was handed to Kasy and she seemed to be doing good until Amira looked to the other lane and saw Olusola Fadiya taking up more speed.

Amira could still hear her heart pounding. She couldn't control or predict her body movement as she beckoned on Kasy to run faster. "Kasy, c'mon, hurry up!"

Sola was way faster than Kasy who seemed to be running out of breath.

She got closer. And closer. But Sola was still ahead.

While Kasy was just a few feet away, Sola had already handed the baton to the next girl on her team. And to think that wasn't bad enough, Kasy tripped on whatever invisible obstacle her village people had set for her and she came tumbling and almost crashing into Amira.

Spectators gasped as Amira stepped away and let Kasy fall gracefully but she'd caught the baton which Kasy had thrown in midair.

A screeching, contagious laughter was heard and Amira was sure that laugh belonged to Zehan. He was laughing at Kasy and he was probably rolling on the track and holding his stomach too but Amira didn't turn to look.

Amira had taken off. She felt her head grow hot and felt sweat all over her body. Even the wind that blew past her was hot.

She needed to win. She must win. Losing wasn't in her vocabulary.

She reminded herself of these things as her legs flew over the track. She knew she was way behind her opponent but things got ugly when she looked to see how far behind she was.

Looking slightly to her left, she was damn sure that who had been racing Annika Malan of all people. It couldn't be.

The urge to win the race suddenly multiplied and Amira was sure her legs would detach from her hips with the way she sped up. She clenched the baton like her life depended on it when she started losing her breath. But that didn't matter because she was slowly overtaking Annika.

They were nearing the finish line and Amira was in the lead. She would've smiled and patted herself on the back if only she wasn't to catch her breath and cross the damn finish line. The line seemed so close yet felt so far away. She didn't know how long she could endure it anymore, her thighs ached.

In less than ten seconds they would have both crossed the finish line with Amira coming first. She had been so proud of herself until the crowd suddenly started yelling.

"Annika! Annika! Annika!"

For a moment, Amira couldn't understand what was happening. Why were they cheering for her? She was losing.

The chanting of Annika's name must've penetrated her line of vision because Amira didn't know when they had crossed the finish line.

But what she knew was that Annika had overtaken at the last minute.

Clapping and cheering filled the atmosphere. Amira hadn't even known that so much people had been paying attention to the race. But then again, anything that had Annika in it attracted attention.

Even Timi was cheering and clapping the loudest for his Head Girl. Amira's stomach churned and her entire inner system went sour.

She hit the baton on the floor with so much force that surprised even she. Everything in her was at a high boiling point. Her breathing was heavy and stuffed. Her throat ran dry and her eyes stung.

Maybe it wasn't the fact that Annika had won but the fact that everyone including Timi and her own brother, if he had been there, supported her and attached so much worth to her.

Amira stormed out of the track without thinking twice and no one noticed. She just couldn't stand it.

It was always Annika Malan in the win for everything. She was always taking every spot: best student, Head Girl, and now, best female athlete too?

Amira headed for the basketball court where she knew she would be alone for awhile without interruptions.

Just as she was about to head into the court, she sighted Ahmed and Tari standing in the middle of the poorly lit court from where she was at the entrance. This was where they had run off to.

Tari seemed to be crying and Ahmed was whispering something to her as he wiped her face. Amira's head swell and it was at that moment she knew she was probably the worse best friend on earth.

A good friend would've gone over to find out why her best friend was balling her eyes out, but instead, Amira stood at the door, wallowing on the fact that Ahmed had never shown that much compassion towards her.

Just two days ago, he'd seen her crying after their mother had slapped and he didn't even bat an eyelid. But here he was, caressing her best friend's face like it was gold. Ahmed had never bought lunch for Amira but he'd done it for Tari, in her presence. And the way he'd shown up for her on the day of her abortion? It was unbelievable.

Amira connected the dots right then and there. She had finally arrived at a feeling towards her best friend. It was the same thing she felt for Annika:

Envy.

As stupid as it sounded, watching Ahmed in Annika's circle of friends made her bitter and miserable but she'd done well to hide it all these years.

Twins were supposed to be close. They were supposed to be there for each other. They were supposed to share in each other's problems and goals and do all the silly things twins did together, but that wasn't applicable to Amira and Ahmed Yusuf. And to top it all off, Ahmed had showered more love and care towards Annika than he'd ever done towards Amira.

And now Tari too?

Tari had been wrong when she said she had nothing Amira could ever want. Tari at least had a brother who was there for her and now she had Ahmed who seemed like he would walk through hell with her.

Ever since the abortion, her brother and best friend had grown closer to each other and she knew it. When Ahmed had come home late on Sunday, he had been with Tari. Amira was sure.

All she'd ever done was to be there for the both of them and now, as she watched them embrace each other like long-lost lovers, her heart threatened to snap in two. She was all alone and maybe it was high time she accepted that.

Maybe Tari had been right. Maybe she had gone personal on the debate just to remind her best friend- and herself- that Tari wasn't perfect and she didn't have it all together. But none of that had made her feel any better.

Before Tari and Ahmed could see her, she ran away with her eyes filled to the brim with tears.

• • •

The SS 2 boys had converted the sports equipment storeroom to a changing room. They had to change back into their normal school uniforms since Tuesday wasn't a sports day and the Vice Principal, for some reason, had only let them practice- and cancel their classes- on the condition that they changed back into their uniforms at the end.

The Nero Sports Olympics was coming up in less than three weeks and after realizing that the entire students of SS 1 weren't good at anything else except gossiping, they'd only picked a few boys from the class to join them. The SS 2s would be (mostly) the ones competing against Castron High. And the fact that Castron High was bringing their SS 3 students only gave them the upper hand.

Mr. Johnson had insisted that the SS 3 students in NSS had final exams to prepare for and therefore, they weren't allowed to participate. That only made things worse and also meant that participation was indefinitely compulsory for the SS 2s, including people like CJ Ikem who never showed up for practice.

Timi thought about how they were definitely going to lose the competition as he headed to the sports equipment store room to change his clothes. Newland Secondary School would definitely be losing but he kept the thought to himself. He was the Head Boy after all, he was supposed to be the most enthusiastic person even if he wasn't good at any other sport except basketball. Good was even too much of a word. He was simply not bad.

The Head Boy was disappointed when he walked into the dark storeroom to find Dele and his gang still there, laughing about something Enock was telling them. Timi had waited behind on the tracks for more than thirty minutes just to make sure that all his classmates would've changed and be long gone by the time he came. It was definitely a shocker to find out that Dele and his friends were still walking around shirtless in the storeroom.

That was a problem.

Timi stood at the door, quietly contemplating on what his next action would be. He wasn't ready to face their criticism. This was particularly what he'd been avoiding.

Timi wasn't going to change with them there. He just couldn't.

But then he suddenly remembered that he was currently missing out on a Physics practical class and he tensed up even more than before. He had to think, and think fast.

The heartbreaking fact was that there was absolutely nowhere else to change. It was either in that room or in the backyard. And anyone could easily look through their class window and see the Head Boy of Newland Secondary stripping down to his bright green boxers.

And whether he liked it or not, his uniform was in that storeroom and he'd have to go in there and get it. And possibly explain why he was not changing in there. Timi knew those boys well, Ahmed would definitely point it out.

But the Physics practical class...

Before Timi could think it through, he adjusted his glasses and and walked into the dark room. He would just change really fast before they noticed he'd even walked in.

For someone so smart, Timi realised how stupid of him that was because as soon as he'd stepped through the door, the laughter and chatting seized. And although he didn't look their way, he could feel their eyes on him.

Timi released a breath he didn't know he had been holding when they had gone back to their conversation as though he was insignificant. That was the only thing Timi wanted at that moment- to be insignificant.

Hastily and roughly, in just five seconds, Timi had removed his glasses and was pulling his sports T-shirt over his body. He stretched out his hand and grabbed the white T-shirt he'd placed on the table tennis in front of him along with his tie, trouser and blazer.

"Dude!" someone yelled in the dark room, stretching the last syllable with what seemed like a well rehearsed America accent.

Enock Sakala.

Timi wasn't sure why the boy had suddenly shouted but he panicked because it didn't sound like he was still conversing with Dele and Ahmed.

Before Timi could finish buttoning up his shirt, he heard footsteps walking over to him from the other side of the room.

"Guy!" Enock now seemed to be in front of him. "Like...how many plates of food do you eat?"

Timi would've probably stopped Enock from slapping his pot belly but there was one problem: Timi couldn't see in the dark without his glasses.

"Na you dey finish una food for house?" Ahmed's now also seemed to be next to him and Timi could guess Dele was probably also making his way over.

This was exactly what he had been trying to avoid but it was even worse than he'd imagined because in his imagination of how this would have gone, he could see.

Without saying a word in response and he felt hands squeezing his stomach he blindly reached for his glass casing. Timi cursed under his breath after he'd accidentally hit the glass casing and he heard it fall to the floor.

"And I was thinking it was just his sister that was big." Enock laughed.

"You no dey see fat wey he carry for hand? E be like Christian mother hand," Ahmed added, slapping his upper arm to see if the skin there would wobble. And it did. They laughed.

"Dude is huge," Dele's voice finally came, "you won't notice because he wears that oversized blazer."

"Like, look at this guy's belly!" Enock exclaimed before snapping his fingers in Timi's face while asked, "Hey, Head Boy, ever heard of workout?"

They laughed again, even louder this time.

"What about pushups?"

Timi didn't know why they found that funny but they did and it infuriated him. He shrugged and slapped their hands off as they poked his boy. He was starting to get very pissed off.

"Gym nko? Ever heard of that place?" Enock was still at it.

Timi bent over and began feeling the dusty tiles for his glass casing.

He must've almost reached it because he heard someone kick it and it slid to another direction, far away from him.

They were still laughing like maniacs.

"What are you doing?" Timi heard a new voice, it sounded commanding and annoyed. Very familiar, breathy and definitely a male. Timi was sure he would have put a face to the voice if only he wasn't trying to keep his breath steady.

"Who be this one?" Ahmed replied to the boy who was at the door.

"I can see there's something wrong with you," the boy fired back immediately, sounding very threatening.

"You don't talk to us like that, mind your fucking business and get out!" Dele sounded particularly irritated with whoever the boy was.

Timi was still blindly searching for his glasses as he felt the floor, moving around on his knees.

"Like, bro, this concern you in any way- "

The boy didn't let Enock finish speaking because he yelled, "It fucking concerns me, he's my cousin!"

Zehan.

Dele laughed a dry, mocking laugh. "Since when? You're just remembering he's your cousin today?"

It was suddenly quiet because Zehan didn't respond. Timi had stopped searching for his glasses and now paid attention to what Zehan would do next.

He heard different footsteps just as Ahmed mumbled, "Abeg, make we commot for here."

Timi felt Zehan grab his right arm and helped him up before putting the glass casing in Timi's hands.

Dele and Co were long as Timi opened the casing and retrieved his glasses. He hurriedly put it on and sighed when his vision started coming back to normal.

It was Zehan's expressionless face he saw first and Timi breathed out again.

It came out croaked, shaky and almost in a whisper but Zehan had heard Timi say "Thank you" because he nodded to it.

Timi immediately rushed over to his clothes and began changing into them faster than ever. His hands and entire body were shaking for some reason.

"Those boys are crazy," said Zehan as she made to change his clothes as well.

Timi didn't say anything. He didn't feel like there was anything that needed to be said. He just didn't understand why Zehan had been so nice to him when Timi had barely said a word to him since his last suicide attempt. He didn't blame Dele for laughing when Zehan had declared they were cousins. Timi himself had been shocked to hear Zehan yell that.

"I swear, I was going to lock them in here for like one hour when I heard there voices outside but then I came and saw you..." Zehan chuckled dryly. It sounded like he was trying to make conversation with Timi but the feeling in the Head Boy's stomach would let him.

Timi adjusted his tie and turned around just as Zehan was changing shoes.

"You still can't see at night?" Zehan asked just as Timi was heading towards the door. He couldn't understand why Zehan was still talking to him when he had failed to respond. Not that Timi meant to be rude but everything felt...awkward.

Zehan stood right after he was done putting on his black shoes and Timi almost smiled at his usual way of dressing: untucked shirt, sleeves rolled up, tie knotted long, loose and dangling. It didn't change.

"In the dark, yes." Timi remembered the reason why he hadn't walked out already- Zehan had asked him a question.

Zehan nodded slowly and Timi figured he wasn't going to say anything else.

He mumbled, "later," before rushing out the door. He walked as fast as he could out of the block as he thought of everything that had gone wrong.

He was thankful that Zehan had come to his rescue but at the same time, he'd wished Zehan would unsee what he had seen. He hated the fact that Zehan had seen him so vulnerable and felt the need to help him and even acknowledge him as his cousin when all Timi and his family had done was to be cruel to Zehan.

Timi wasn't even sure he would've stood up to Dele Akindele and his friends had Zehan been in that situation.

Yes, his parents had created a distance between them and the Essiens but Timi had done nothing about it regardless. Zehan had all the right in the world to hate his cousins but from had just happened, it didn't seem like that was the case. At least it didn't seem like he had anything against Timi.

And that made Timi feel even worse. All his family had ever done since the beginning of time was judge everything Aunt Monica and her family did because they belonged to another religion when they hadn't committed any crime except being good people going through the something unimaginable.

That had to change.