Hannah

The next day, after I get back from work, I go into the main house to find Erin. I need to tell her about my mom calling last night. I also need to ask her a favor.

  "Hey, honey. How was your day?" she asks me right away.

 She's in the kitchen, drinking a coffee. It seems like when she's home she's either drinking a coffee or reading a book. I love how she's so casual and relaxed the majority of the time. Now she's wearing shorts and t-shirt and her hair is down. 

 "Oh, good. Not busy at the store," I tell her, pulling out the chair across from her.

  "Are you hungry? There's some pasta from lunch in the fridge," she goes on, literally just sipping her coffee and keeping her eyes on me.

  "Yeah... thanks." I don't move, though. I am hungry but that doesn't matter right now.

  "Something on your mind?" Erin asks, almost right away.

  She knows me well, already. She listens and pays attention. She's not the person that my mother thinks she is, I know that for sure. Erin is caring and thoughtful and loves me without a cost, because I'm her family.

   "Actually... yes," I admit, but I'm avoiding her eyes.

   "Alright... well I'm here if you need to talk."

  She's acting like it's no big deal, but I like that she's not being pushing about it. I can still decide to walk away and not say what I'm about to say, if I wanted.  But I have to say it. I have to tell her.

  I take in a deep breath anyway. "Um... I just... I should have told you already, but I didn't even want to think about it-"

  Erin is staring, waiting. Her eyes are wide and her mouth is a tight line. She knows something important is about to happen, I can feel it.

  "My mom called me," I go on, finally. "Um... first, a couple weeks ago and then again last night."

  "Oh." Erin's reaction is not really what I was expecting. She's mostly calm, though her eyes changed a bit. "What did she say?"

  "She's just... she's angry. I told her where I am... maybe I shouldn't have..." I say, and then bite my lower lip and wait. Erin doesn't say anything. "I just... after last night... I want to change my cell number. I don't really want her to be able to call me."

   "Oh," she says again. I can tell she wasn't expecting that. "Well... if you're sure, I can take you down to the mall, in town... I'm sure we can find a store that can do that."

  "Yes, please," I say quickly. "Can we go today?"

  Erin looks even more surprised, but nods. "Yeah, of course. Let me know when you're ready to go."

  There's a weight lifted from my shoulders after that trip to the mall, to get my cell phone number changed. Something about knowing my mom won't be able to call at all makes me feel safer, better, in general. Maybe I shouldn't have acted so harshly, but she really has a hold on me, mentally, and now I feel like, maybe, I can actually move on. I've been thinking a lot about how my life was with her, for all those years. And now that I have something to compare it to, I know that it wasn't good.

  The next day at work, Cannon is working next door, at the bike shop.  I've been at work since 6A.M. and it's been a long day already, even though it's only noon. On his break, he comes over to see me. I can see him coming through the glass window on the door and my heart beat picks up. Nothing about Cannon and I has been conventional thus far, but I don't really have a problem with that. The way that my body reacts to seeing him means something.

  My hands are sweating as he enters the store.

  "Hey," he grins, walking towards the counter, where I'm working.

  "Hi."

  "You want to hang out tonight?" he asks, that sweet smile staying on hisi face.

  I do, I really do. But I don't want him to know how badly I want to hang out with him. I've been thinking about him so much since he took me to the beach, on my birthday. It was only three days ago. I shouldn't be so invested in this guy that I barely know, but I am.

  And right now he's wearing his blue coveralls with a patch on the chest that says "Can". His hair is a mess and the way he's smiling at me is really doing a number on my heart.    

  "Maybe," I say anyway.

  "Maybe?" he asks with a laugh, leaning onto the counter.

  There's no one else in the store right now. There hasn't really been any customers all day.

  "Well, I'm off at 2PM," I tell him.

  "Yeah, I know." He turns serious for a second but then is smiling again. "I'm working til 4PM. Maybe I can come over after?"

    "Okay." I give in, because obviously I want to see him.

    "Okay," he repeats, the nods and spins around to go back to the bike shop.

   When there's a light tap on the pool house door later that afternoon, I suck in a breath. It's after 5P.M. and I've already agreed to have dinner with Erin  tonight, around 6:30P.M. I don't have a lot of time but I'm so excited to see Cannon that I try to forget about that. I changed into a red dress with thin straps and put on a little make up, and as I walk towards the door to let him in, my heart is racing again.

  "Hey," he coos, then looks me up and down. "Um..."

  I look outside, behind him, to make sure no one sees him here and then pull him inside and close the door. "What?"

  "You look..." He lets his voice trail off. "So good."

  I shake my head and turn around to walk over to the sofa. Before I can even get there, Cannon is right up behind me, wrapping his arms around me from behind. He nuzzles his mouth into my hair and squeezes me and then waits for my reaction. I just stand there, frozen. When he spins me around so I'm facing him, he's got a serious look on his face.

  "Did you change into this for me?" he wants to know, his eyes staying on mine.

  I lick my too-dry lips and don't say a word. He already knows the answer.

  "Tell me," he grunts, his voice barely a whisper.

  I nod, and then say, "Yes."

 Cannon moans and brings his hands up to my butt, then leans in and kisses my shoulder. "You smells so good."

  I love everything he says and does. I don't care if he's just using me because I'm new or I'm available or I'm Seb's cousin. He makes me feel like it's real, even if it's not. My body tightens at his touch and when he brings his mouth back up level with my face, I want to pull him close and kiss him.

   "So, you want to watch a movie or something?" I ask instead, but I don't move.

  He swallows hard and stares at me, and then steps back a bit. "Yeah, sure."

  The sexual tension is crazy between us but I know we both understand that we can't just have sex right away every time we're alone. Also, it's early evening and I have to be in the main house in less than an hour to have dinner with Erin.

  We go over to the sofa and sit and I grab the remove for the TV to put on Netflix. I'm scrolling through to find something to put on, and trying to ignore the fact that Cannon is sitting right there, so close to me, when my phone dings. I pass him the remote and reach for my phone.

  Erin: Are we still on for dinner?

  I'm praying that if she's home now, she doesn't know that Cannon is in the pool house with me. If she knew, she'd likely come out here and see what we are doing. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be okay with us being alone in here.

  Me: Of course. See you at 630?

  Erin: Sounds good. I'm starting dinner now.

  When I put down my phone, I look up and see that Cannon picked a rom com with Ashton Kutcher and it's just starting. I glance at him and he shrugs and then he looks over at the TV again.

   "I only have an hour. I am having dinner with Erin," I say, so he knows in advance.

 There's a slight look of disappointment on his face but he washes it away pretty fast. "It's all good. I'm glad to see you for a bit."

    "You like this movie?" I ask him, then grin.

    "I do. It's good." He shrugs again, and then moves in closer to me. "But I don't think I'll be watching the movie, if we don't have much time."

  I bite my bottom lip and keep my eyes on him, but he just grins and looks back at the TV again. A moment later, one of his hands is on my thigh. He holds it there, waiting for my reaction. I try not to give one, but I let out a noise from my throat. His hand trails up higher until it's just under my dress, and I know what's going to happen. I know what he wants to do and I don't know if I'm ready. Things feel so different with Cannon, like every new thing we do actually means something. I suck in a breath as he freezes, then looks at me.

    "You tell me... yes or no..." His voice is almost a growl and I can feel how bad he wants this, so I nod. "Tell me," he repeats.

    "Yes."

  He doesn't hesitate and a moment later his fingers are pressed against my underwear. I moan and squeeze my hands into fists.

  It's too much and not enough and somehow it's different and better and more than the last time we were together, when we had sex. Sex is one thing, but this is different. It's intimate and personal. I toss my head back and close my eyes. I trust him completely, which terrifies me. I barely know him, but I trust him with my body.

  Cannon grunts and the next twenty minutes just fly by in a blur. It starts with him making me feel good and then me making him feel good and then we are both done and just breathing heavily and staring at each other. I am sure of the fact that this is all new to both of us. We haven't talked about what this means, really, but whatever it is that is happening between us is crazy and good.

  It's after 6:30PM when I finally tell him it's time for him to leave. He kisses me and then slips out of the pool house, hopefully without a trace. I adjust myself and fix my hair and then head out to the main house a few minutes later, as if nothing happened at all.