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nineteen - don't cry, daddy

Note: chapter contains homophobia.

• • •

"Alright class, it's home time now. Gather your school bags and your other things ready to go and meet your mummies and daddies outside."

Mrs Hall's polite instructions cause around two dozen excited children to run towards the cloakroom, practically climbing over one another to grab their belongings in preparation for going home for the day. She opens the door of the classroom, letting in the crisp autumn air from outside; a few kids immediately see their parents waiting for them, so they bound over to them. Kieran fastens the zip on his jacket, before lifting his bag from off his designated hook in the cloakroom. As he heads outside to look for either one of his fathers, he is met with the familiar, jarring voice of his classmate.

"Where are your daddies, Kieran?" Esme taunts from behind him, causing him to turn around.

"I'm waiting for them to get here, Esme," he responds innocently. "Where's your mummy?"

"She's probably on her way here now. She has a really important job, and she's really important there," Esme rambles. "So sometimes she has to stay at work for longer. She's the most important person there. And she works for famous people."

"No she doesn't," Kieran argues. "You're lying. She doesn't work for famous people."

"She does. I've even met loads of them," Esme lies. "Famous people like One Direction and Bruno Mars."

"You're crazy, Esme," Kieran scoffs.

"Yeah well, you're just jealous that I've met cool famous people because I have a cool mum. But you have two daddies and that's dis—gus—ting." The latter word of her statement is sung, much like a jingle.

"No it's not. They both love me," Kieran defends. "And I love them."

"Maybe that's why they have stupid boring jobs. Because they shouldn't love each other. They should find a real, actual mum to love you instead."

"I knew you were still bullying my little boy!" George pops up seemingly out of nowhere, much to the children's surprise, and accuses her. "So you're Esme, the girl who's been making nasty comments about Kieran's father and I?"

Just George's demeanour alone causes Esme to falter. "I-I didn't say anything bad. I-I didn't—"

"I heard you with my own ears, sweetheart," George corrects her. "Seems like I need to have a word with Mrs Hall, and your mum about this."

"I'm sorry Mister," Esme cries, in a feeble attempt to undo what she's said. "I'm sorry Kieran."

"This needs to be sorted," George decides, heading towards the classroom door to see Mrs Hall grading some class work at her desk. "Mrs Hall? A word please?"

"Of course." She looks up from what she's doing, before rising from her seated position. "How can I help you, Mr Panayiotou-Jones?"

"I just want to ask you again — have you heard Esme making comments about me and my husband since the first time?"

"I already reassured you, Mr Panayiotou-Jones, that I would tell you immediately if I heard anything untoward being said in my classroom. Why do you ask?"

"Because I've just heard Esme disrespecting us with my own ears," George divulges. "Saying to my son that we should be finding him a mother to take care of him instead of two fathers. Something needs to be done about this behaviour immediately."

"I'm so sorry to hear this," Mrs Hall frowns, resting one hand on her hip, and the other on her forehead in contemplation. "I really thought that this had stopped. It makes me wonder what else has been said while I've been out of earshot. Kieran hasn't said anything to me if she has said anything."

"I'd like to think that he's told me everything," George adds. "I don't think he would keep that kind of thing from me. Surely he wouldn't?"

"It's probably best if you ask him yourself," Mrs Hall suggests. "We need to find out for sure whether Esme has said anything else since the first couple of incidents. Although I do know it's her mother feeding her these nasty opinions."

"Well her mother sounds like a piece of work," George huffs. "So what should we do about this?"

"Go home with Kieran and talk to him tonight. Ask him whether anything else has been said. Tell him that he needs to tell you the truth," Mrs Hall explains. "Then, once you know for sure, come back and talk to me. We'll get it reported and we'll call a meeting with Esme's parents in the headteacher's office to decide on the next steps."

"Okay." George takes a moment to compose himself slightly; he is angry that the situation is still going on, but he hopes this is the turning point for it. "Thank you. I'll take him home now, and I'll talk to him. I'll let you know what gets said, when I bring him to school tomorrow. Thanks again."

"No problem. Have a good evening, Mr Panayiotou-Jones."

"And yourself." With these words spoken, he heads back outside to collect his son and Gemma from her respective class.

• • •

"Now listen, mate. I need you to be one-hundred percent honest with me right now. Okay?" George asks Kieran. "Will you be honest with me?"

"Yes, Daddy," Kieran agrees sweetly.

"Okay. So, obviously, this afternoon I heard Esme saying some nasty things about me and Daddy. Do you remember that?"

"Yes, Daddy."

"Okay, good. Now, I want you to tell me the truth — and you must know, that you're not going to be in any trouble whatever you say to me. None of this is your fault. You understand?"

"I do."

"Right." George smiles to Kieran, before voicing the question. "Can you tell me if Esme has said anything else about me and Daddy since the very first time? Do you remember the first time?"

Kieran's expression shifts very subtly to suggest he is uncomfortable with the question he has been asked. He doesn't talk, as he doesn't want to cause his father any further stress than he is already experiencing.

"Kieran?" Levi pipes up, to encourage his son gently. "You can tell us. We aren't upset; and we aren't mad at you either. We promise."

After a couple of minutes, Kieran finally nods his head slowly — his way of answering the question. Instantly, George's facial expression softens sadly, at the notion that Kieran has not spoken up about this before now.

"Oh, mate. Why didn't you tell us?" George presses, not even slightly presenting himself as intimidating. "You know you can talk to us. We can always help you if you're getting these nasty comments."

"Kieran, you should have told us," Levi adds. "And this isn't us telling you off. We're glad you told us now. But how come you didn't tell us before now? Was there something that stopped you?"

"I-I know Daddy is sad a lot at the minute," Kieran explains. "Because of Grandma. I didn't want to make him more sad because of Esme being mean about him. So I didn't tell you."

The justification is enough to crush poor George's heart; for his son to try and be as selfless as this at the age of just seven years old is beyond his comprehension. Simultaneously, however, it hurts him to know that he is, in essence, the reason Kieran has remained silent about the bullying he has fallen victim to.

"Oh, son." George brings Kieran into his arms. "You didn't need to worry about me. I'm your father. I'm here to help you, always. You can tell me absolutely everything. Anything in the world. And I will always do my best to help you. You are everything to me — do you know that?"

"I'm sorry," Kieran utters.

"You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for," George assures him. He parts from Kieran, taking a moment to admire the dashing mini-him before his eyes. "You and Gem are the most important people in the world to me. Your father and I will do whatever it takes to make sure you're both happy and okay. Kieran Georgios Panayiotou-Jones, you are so important to me; and I love you so much."

"You know he's serious when he calls you by your full legal name," Levi jokes softly. "But your father is right. We both love you and Gem more than anything in the world. It's our job to protect you. That's why we ask about Esme. To make sure we can protect you from the mean things she's been saying."

"And we're going to get it sorted tomorrow," George elaborates. "Because we're going to go and talk to Mrs Hall tomorrow morning when we take you to school. But you won't get in any trouble, I promise."

"Okay," Kieran acknowledges, trying to process everything that's just been said to him. "Do I have to tell you what else she said to me before?"

"If you can, mate," Levi answers. "As much as you can remember. And I'll write it all down ready for tomorrow."

• • •

"So what's Mrs Hall going to do now you've told her everything Kieran told us?" Levi asks George. "Is there going to be a meeting of some sort?"

"That's what she said, yes," George responds. "She said there's going to be a meeting including us, Esme's parents and then the kids themselves — Esme and Kieran. And then, of course, the headteacher."

"And what's that going to entail?"

"Well," George starts. "I guess we hear all the sides to the story. What else can the school really do?"

"It's a bit of a shit one," Levi sighs, as he pulls onto the road that the school is on. "I can't believe we got stuck in traffic on the way here. I didn't realise leaving for the school run twenty minutes later would be so detrimental."

"Well, it's all down to your therapy session ending later than you planned," George points out. "Normally it finishes at two-thirty. This time it ended at ten-to three. If I'd have known you were running late, I'd have come to collect them on my own. Like last time, for example."

"I just look at it this way — I know it's early days, but it's helping me a lot with dealing with what happened with Mack," Levi justifies. "Isn't that worth the whole "getting caught in traffic" stuff?"

"I suppose. If you're into the talking stuff," George jibes. "Because I, for one, am not."

"I'll change your mind at some point," Levi chuckles, bringing the car to a stop outside the school. "Right ... let's get the little monsters, shall we?" He removes his seatbelt, which unconsciously prompts George to follow suit; they exit the vehicle and head towards the playground where the classrooms are.

"You get Gem. I'll get Kieran," George instructs. "Meet back at the school gates."

"Got it, boss." Levi paces ahead, due to the distance of Gemma's class being significantly further than Kieran's.

As George approaches Kieran's classroom, he spots that his son is stood outside the building with another mother. All the other kids have already been taken home, so the school is nearly entirely vacant. He assumes all is well, until he hears disciplined scolding being directed at Kieran. Walking with a higher sense of urgency, George feels rage build up within him; he doesn't know why somebody is shouting at his son, but he is adamant that he must find out the reason immediately. He doesn't draw attention to himself purely so that he can eavesdrop on what's being said specifically — but by the same token, he doesn't wish to prolong the borderline-yelling being directed at Kieran.

"So you're telling me that you're the little shithead that thought it was a good idea to get my baby girl into trouble with the school, just because you can't handle the truth about having two dads huh? Just because you can't have a mum and a dad like every other kid in school? You ought to be ashamed of yourself for all the hurtful things you've caused. Esme is so upset right now, and it's all your fault!"

Upon hearing this, George leaps into action. He makes a beeline straight for Kieran; once he's in close proximity, he blocks his son's ears with his large hands, to muffle the mature words he's about to say.

"Who the fuck do you think you're talking to?" George demands. "And what gives you the right to scold my boy like that? How fucking dare you talk to him like that!"

"Oh, so you're the famous daddy are you?" the woman cackles. "Where's your kids' other daddy, huh? Out there fucking some other woman like he should be?"

"So you're Esme's mum then, I take it?" George spits. "There's a word to describe people like you. But it begins with a C and I'm not permitted to say it with kids around."

"I'm entitled to my own opinion, sunshine," Esme's mother retorts. "But I guess you're better at handling dicks, than you are at handling the truth."

"You've got some nerve," George scoffs, visibly seething with anger. "Now take it from me. If you ever dare to talk to my son — or my daughter, for that matter — ever again ... particularly in that disgusting tone of yours, then I'll have no choice but to seek further action than is already being taken."

"What are you going to do about it?" Esme's mother challenges. "Get me arrested? At least I'm designed to fuck guys. I'll see you in the headmaster's office next week, dickhead." Without giving George a chance to respond, she makes her overly dramatic exit with her daughter trailing awkwardly behind her.

George woefully uncovers Kieran's ears, watching the vile woman as she heads towards the school gates. He glances down at his son, who is bewildered by what has just happened.

"I'm so sorry, Kieran," he apologises quietly, feeling huge disappointment for how things have escalated. "I hope you didn't hear what Esme's mum and I said to each other."

"I heard some bad words," Kieran answers. "But they were quiet because you covered my ears."

"I'm so sorry you had to hear that," George murmurs. "I never wanted you to hear me say bad words like that. And it won't happen again. I only said them to protect you. But it wasn't a good way to handle the situation; and you shouldn't repeat the words that you heard. Okay?"

"Okay," Kieran agrees. "Am I really in trouble because of what I told you and Daddy?"

"Absolutely not," George reassures him. "Esme's mum is a nasty, horrible person. She was upset that you are the good guy in this situation, and she is the bad guy. So she thought that shouting at you would make her the good guy. But it won't, and I'm so sorry for how she spoke to you just then." As he speaks, his voice breaks — a result of tears forming in his eyes for how heartbroken he is. "I'm so sorry."

"Please don't cry, Daddy," Kieran pleads innocently, his own eyes glazing over with emotion. "I don't want you to be sad."

George doesn't speak; instead, he lowers himself to his son's level, and brings him in for a heartfelt hug in the middle of the school playground. With no other people around, and the brittle winds whistling in their ears, they remain in this position to console one another.

• • •

Chapter nineteen! Hope you enjoyed this one. xx

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