After the fireworks, it was as if the gates opened and the festivities truly started. Dancing and feasting were tame pastimes until the Peacekeepers grew tired, performing their duties with less attention. By this time last year, Sera and Kole had been alone and so tangled with one another the world had fallen away; it was just them, two bodies breathing each other in and out with one mind.

This year, Sera stood alone in a sea of people awash with drink and merriment. She had left Nena and Evelynn, not wanting to taint their happy night with her misery. It was unfair of her to spoil a night that should be enjoyed and soaked up. During the walk through the stands, the open alehouses, and the impromptu dance floors, Sera wished for wings so she could lift over the heads between her and safety, fly home, and crawl into bed.

She kept her head down so as not to catch the eye of any drunkard, her hand tucked at her side, close to her pocket where the remainder of her weekly stipend hid. The crowd milled around her, their bodies jostling and grinding. One man stood back as Sera reached him, right into her way, and she tripped to avoid him. He apologized with a series of pleading hand gestures, and an offer to buy her a drink, but she refused and turned away.

And that's when she saw him.

He had come, but not for her.

She blinked, wanting his face to change when she opened them again, praying it did. It didn't. It was his face. Kole's face. Smiling, laughing as if mirth was the only thing he knew. His posture relaxed and confident, he leaned towards the man and woman he stood with.

He had come, but not to her.

Sera debated storming up to him and demanding an explanation. She deserved as much, but she wasn't the type to cause such a scene. She wasn't the type to perform jealously for a crowd of strangers to witness, and she definitely was not the type to grow angry with Kole without giving him a chance to explain himself. So she approached him, schooling her face to show a hint of confusion, and not the hurt that demanded to be felt.

Kole's head perked up when she was a few feet away. His eyes met hers and narrowed. They were cold, angry even. He extricated himself from his two companions. Sera didn't recognize either, but the woman, with her bright red hair and luscious figure, turned and seemed to know Sera was the reason for Kole leaving. Animosity raged from her beautiful, painted face; big, green eyes threw arrowheads and full lips pursed with a promise for pain. Sera dragged her gaze to Kole who was closer now, and still not looking at her.

"Sera," he said when he was close enough to be heard.

She waited for an explanation, but none came. "I was waiting by the square. I thought..."

Kole took a deep breath, his whole body growing with it.

"Kole," Sera reached to touch his arm and was surprised when he yanked his arm free. "What's wrong? What have I done? Have I...done something wrong?"

His eyes latched onto hers. "I'm working Sera, not everything is about you. I can't make everything about you."

Sera swallowed, her arms feeling heavy and useless. What were they meant to do if not reach for him? She wrapped them around her torso. "Excuse me? When did I–"

"It doesn't matter."

"Don't do that. Don't shut me down to shut me out. I can't..." She repositioned, bracing herself. "I wish you would talk to me, Koltin. I cannot read your mind, and you are acting as if I have done something wrong."

"I can't talk to you, Sera. You don't want to hear about what I have to say, about what I have to do."

"Of course I do. I've always–"

"Controlled me? Kept me contained? You made it clear you were not comfortable with me being who I am and–"

"Out of concern, Koltin. I have never tried controlling you."

Kole leaned forward, his body bunched and tense like a predator. "It was you that first suggested I change what I do."

Sera's jaw dropped, her hurt changing, twisting, curling into anger. "You mean killing people for money?" she hissed. "That was both of us. You hated it. I hated it because you hated it."

Kole snorted. "I hated it for you. I became this for you. I freed myself of Rufus because it was the only way to choose a path you would be proud of."

Her fists clenched, a part of her happy to hear him talking and the other part dying at his words. Her mind raced back to every conversation, every moment they had spent discussing, planning, and agreeing. Lies? She could not believe it was all a farce. "Where is this coming from?" Her voice was small, soft, the hurt so obvious.

"Maybe from the years of pretending to be a domesticated wolf."

"Stop it, Koltin. Stop lying to me."

"Who says I'm lying?"

"Me, because after years of seeing you lie to others I know what to look for."

"Clearly not."

"Oh? Then not talking is not one of your rules for a good lie? The less said, the more assumed and the smaller chance of discovery? Didn't it go something along those lines?"

"You know, I'm trying to be tactful in my honesty."

"You're trying to hide something from me."

"No, I'm not. For the first time I'm being honest, Sera."

"Honest? I know when you're being honest," she snapped. "I know you throw up armour and bare teeth when you are hiding something."

"And the only reason I'm not is because I'm not that heartless. I could say a lot more you would not want to hear."

"Then say it. I'd rather hear you speak the truth than beat around it. I might not understand why you are directing this animosity towards me, but I'd rather hear it than wonder."

"Is it not obvious?" Kole laughed, spreading his arms wide. "I've had enough. I can't do it anymore. I can't pretend anymore"

"Pretend what?" She cringed at the question.

"All of it." His voice lowered and he took a step closer so only she could hear. "I've a title to keep and I cannot expect to keep it without menace. You think I can control the streets without shedding blood? Without striking fear and terror in those that oppose me? You have been a naive fool if you think I have held on to this title for so long without snuffing out a few sparks."

A lump was forming in Sera's throat, threatening to choke her with tears. "Is that it? Why didn't you say anything?"

"And suffer your judgement? Your pity, or worse have you try to help me?"

"Forgive me for caring too much, Koltin but–"

"That's the problem! You're too...pure to understand me, to understand my world. It's notions that you can care for me and help me that I have supported for far too long. You're not a part of my world and you will never be. It's something we cannot change."

Sera stared at him. Her one hand rested on her shaking chest and the other pressed against her mouth. "I think we should talk when you are not drunk."

"You think I'm drunk?" Kole threw back his head and laughed. "Love, I'm just sober enough to know what I am saying. You always say that a man in his cups speaks more honesty. Well," he bowed, as if performing a show, "here's my honesty. Like it?"

"Koltin," she breathed his name, as if it would conjure the real him. This was not the real him. This was an angry, hurt, haunted man, all she needed to do was break through his barriers. She had to be patient. People hurt those they felt closest to. Usually it was family, and family was never a choice. No matter how hard you pushed, blood bonds were as strong as granite.

She'd prove their bond was stronger yet.

Kole took another deep breath. "Go home, Sera. We can talk then if you think it will make much of a difference."

"No," Sera scoffed. "We're talking now. Come with me, so that we can talk about this."

"About what?"

"About whatever it is you are going through. I have never judged you, you know. You freed yourself of Rufus because you wanted to set a better example for Hannah. You took on this title to set a different tone on the streets. I suggested none of that. It was all you. All I did was support and encourage you when you needed it. So don't push at me and lash out at me just because you're feeling pressure from the responsibility you now bear. I've never asked you to bear it alone."

His pause was long and the friction between them simmered in the air. Sera wanted to hit him for his behaviour, at the same time she wanted to envelop and squeeze him until his senses returned. But when he spoke, those thoughts evaporated like water on a fire.

"No," he growled. "You have never asked me to bear my problems alone. Everything is shared with you. I have to share your burdens, you fears...your mother."

Sera's breath caught.

"I bear your burdens, Sera, and as much as you think you help me with mine, you support a fantasy of a criminal that just cannot be. How long did you think I would survive without blood on my hands? How long did you possibly think I could survive? I'll admit, at first I was happy for the change, but then an oath turned to ropes and those ropes are now around my neck, and I only see one reason for it."

The tears were building in strength, Sera didn't know how much longer she could keep them back. She closed her eyes, her breaths shaking until they formed sobs.

Kole watched as his words finally broke the siege and began wreaking havoc inside her. He wanted to kick himself, throw himself off a bridge, punish himself for every lash, every stab. She had dealt quite well at first, as he expected her to. She had brushed off his remarks, seeing through them. She had forced him to up his game, to dig deeper and take the vulnerabilities she had invested in his trust—which he guarded and cosseted—and attack them.

"I think I should go," she said, her body shaking with sobs she was trying to hide from him.

If she looked up, she would see the pain reflected in his eyes. He could not help it at that moment. A part of him was dying with her. Those tears were his, and not because he claimed them. He had made them. They were blood on his hands, the stones in his boots, the weight on his back, and they were crushing him. "I should not have spoken so plainly," he said. A hint of remorse would seal the deal. She'd believe him more if he showed a sliver of humanity, for what he had just done was beneath the worst of men. He had taken a stab at innocence, he had feasted on kindness and killed trust. "You're right in saying ale has loosened my tongue, but I cannot say I regret not saying it. It's...it's something I have needed to say for a long time."

Sera sniffed. "You should have spoken earlier. Perhaps then you wouldn't have been so cruel in your delivery." She looked up, her warm eyes glistening with tears.

She brushed past him, her shoulder bumping his. He did not watch her leave, if he turned he would run after her and apologize. He would cover her in kisses and admit his lies. He had to root himself to the floor and remind himself why he was doing this. Why it was necessary. His fists clenched until his nails dug into his flesh. He rarely cried, especially not in public. He felt sorrow as if it were mud caking his skin, seeping into his flesh, and thickening his blood. He felt dirty, his skin not his own. He had hurt her. Really, truly hurt her, and in doing so, he had deadened most of his heart.

He looked up after the tears had dried, and just as he had thought, a sentinel stood on a rooftop in plain sight, watching, monitoring, and directing his downfall.

Sera gathered her skirts and pushed through the crowd, not apologizing when she pushed too hard or stepped on toes. Her vision was blurred, her limbs weak. She had never felt the need to put distance between herself and Kole, but the need to get away from him now was so strong, it pulled her along, keeping her upright, yet a part of her still wanted him to stop her. To run after her and...what? Explain more? Apologize? He had apologized, but only for the harshness of the words, not the words themselves. Not the heart-crushing, dream-shattering, life-altering words that had shifted her being and made her doubt her very existence.

He can't mean all of it. He can't. We'll talk it out tomorrow when he is sober and I am less emotional. There may be truth in his anger, but not to this extent.

There had been holes in his account. She had pointed them out and he had pointedly refused to acknowledge it. Was that not admission of doubt in his truth? He wasn't telling her everything.

Hands grabbed her and spun her around. Her heart expected to see deep blue eyes, black hair and a bruised, loving face, but the face that met hers was gold. Hazel eyes and golden hair, with skin smooth and tanned, hinting towards foreign parentage.

"Chester," she sighed and swiped the tears that had fallen through her defences. She swallowed. "Having a good night?" she forced herself to say with a smile.

He regarded her, taking in the tears and her shaking frame. "What happened?" he asked, ignoring her question.

Sera bit on her bottom lip, not wanting to relive the words, but having questions pushed her to speak. "How long has he been unhappy?"

Chase frowned, looking over his shoulder. "Who? Koltin?"

She nodded, her gaze dropping to her boots.

"A while," Chase said eventually. "Sera, what did he say?"

"Enough," she answered. She pulled free of his gentle grip. "I'd like to go home. I've...I've had enough noise for one night."

Chase nodded. "I'll walk with you. Tonight's not the safest night to be on your own."