I couldn't even see properly as I stepped off the elevator because my eyes were filled with tears. I wasn't sure where I should be going now. Oh god! How can I go home? What will I say to mom and dad? Thinking about it made me stop for a while to cry some more. I can't even believe that I screwed everything up so badly.

Mr.Jack had seen the video. That's how they all knew where I was, but I had not brought my phone with me so they couldn't contact me either and began panicking when I didn't return home for hours.

"You're lucky, I didn't call the police." said Mr.Jack and I know he was right, I mean if I thought someone ran off with my child I would have done the same.

So here I am, fired just three and a half months later from my first job. You know what makes me more angry? This was all my fault. I could have done things so much differently if I stopped to think for a moment. My parents would probably throw me out of the house too, for being such a screw up.

What other job will be able to get? I messed up with the child of the biggest businessman on the entire galaxy! I will surely not be able to babysit anybody else. Who's going to trust me now?

Mr.Jack had security escort me out and my details were taken so I wouldn't be let into anywhere near the building ever again, not that I would ever have the courage. I walked all the way to the station for nearly thirty minutes. I didn't even feel tired because my mind was all over the place. People passing by were looking at me all funny but I didn't know if it was because i was crying or because they had seen the video.

"How did you think it felt when I saw my child being treated like a f***ing animal all over the internet?"

I couldn't think of a way to answer that. I mean I barely spoke at all just stood there trying not to break down in front of him becauseI knew I deserved all of this.

"Madeline ..." my mom began when she heard me come in, and I braced myself again for the shitstorm number two. But something about me stopped her from saying anymore and I walked straight past her into my room and closed the door behind me. I wanted to be alone with all my sadness for now, at least until my parents come and ask me to go away or something. That would be the perfect ending for such a crappy day.

They left me alone until dinner time when I heard a faint knock on the door.

"Madeline, come eat. It's getting late."

I didn't bother replying because I didn't want to eat. Would it be possible to starve myself overnight?

"Madeline come out dear. Your father is waiting for you."

Dear? I am never called that. Might as well get everything over now. I got up and saw myself in the mirror as I walked by. I looked like death. My eyes were red and puffy, my hair all over the place. I didn't bother to fix myself, what's the point? That's how I felt on the inside anyway.

Dad looked at me as I came in but he too went silent when he actually saw how I looked.

"The weather robot said that it will rain tomorrow, crazy rains we've been getting these days."

It was already raining. In my heart. I couldn't eat. So I kept pushing the mashed potatoes all over the place.

"Ah.. yes the rain. It's bad this year. It was bad last year too but this year it's much worse."

I wished they would stop talking about the rain. It was getting so awkward.

I finished my dinner without actually eating anything and went out on the balcony to see if fresh air would make me feel better. It didn't.

I didn't hear mom coming in until she called out my name. I didn't turn to her so she came to stand beside me.

"Did you get .....fired for ...?"

I nodded. Oh god! Thinking about it made me so much more crappier. My mom put her hand on my shoulder.

"It's okay honey. It happens to all of us someday. Your father once got fired for bringing fish to the break room" she laughed. I didn't. It was not the same thing.

"This was all my fault. How could I have been so stupid?"

"It was an honest mistake, dear. How could you have known what would happen?"

"I didn't even get to say goodbye" That made me cry all over again. Bear. I would never see him again. Would he even notice me missing?

He wouldn't. I wish he would be happy with a babysitter with so much more common sense.

For days I didn't bother eating or sleeping much. I couldn't. I didn't even come out of my room much. Mom did once make me go to the store because the delivery forgot the milk again, but the rest of the day I stayed inside curled up into a ball.

I think it got so bad, mom had Erine come over one day.

"Shortie!" she called out knocking at my door. I opened it, cause I knew she wasn't going to stop or go away otherwise.

She'll probably be telling me exactly how I screwed up.

"Got yourself fired from work huh?" Oh god! She was not good at this.

"Look at you all grown up. Four months ago, you were cooped up in here all useless."

What point was she trying to make? I wasn't getting it.

"But it was all my fault"

Erine put her hand around me and I tensed up. She never does that.

"No Shortie! I saw the video. This is probably the first time in your life that you did something right."

"You could have done things differently, yes but the way you handled everything. I was impressed. Think of it as a lesson for your next job"

Their probably wouldn't be another job for me. Not in child care anyway.

"Just for the record. You can come babysit our kids anytime, you know that right?"

I managed to smile at that. It was the first time in my life Erine didn't say anything sarcastic. This must be the silver lining in the dark cloud.

I thought about everything when I went to sleep that night. I know that I can't stay like this forever. I would have to look for something else.

But where I should I even start?