33.5:"Shadow"
"Oh! Gul". Sufiyaan said shocked
But she remains still in her place and her eyes travelled to the woman beside him only adding into the pain she was feeling.
It was him.
The one who betrayed her.
The reason for her losing everyone in one night.
Waazi notices the way she turned back in her shell. It didn't take him a second to know who he was to her. For him, Sufiyaan was just his new business partner that too because he had worked with his wife and she wanted to have him in the project too now.
"When did you two get married?". He asked knowing the answer will only make him madder
"About two months ago". Sufiyaan said smiling at his wife
His eyes turned into a blazing fire but then Sufiyaan's wife spoke, "You never told me about any Gul?. She didn't come to our wedding?. Who is she?".
"She wasn't that important I just know her from college". Sufiyaan said breaking her into more pieces
I promise to stay with you forever. I never had anyone in my life as important as you.
Lies. More lies.
"C-". His mother started
But then Sufiyaan's wife phone ring so she went away to attend it.
"You were getting married that's what I last heard. Is he the one?". Sufiyaan asked
She was about to shake her head but she didn't for some reasons.
"It's good that you are married". Sufiyaan said smiling
No one spoke.
"We need to leave, I am sorry". His wife said coming back and the moment she came he hold her hand
Gul gulped down her emotions until they were out of the house saying they will come tomorrow instead. The minute the door closes she fall down on the floor as her legs give up.
"Gul". His mother said coming near her to hold
"He lied to me". She said crying as she broke down, "Everything was a lie".
"Do you want closure with him?". He asked coming back in
She shakes her head, "And hear him saying the words I am already in pain thinking about?. I saw him getting married that night you found me. I ran away from my own wedding which my brothers and father were doing forcefully to one of my bad cousin. I went leaving that wedding to him in hopes that he will fulfil his promise instead I found him marrying someone else".
"You didn't stop or ask him?". He asked confused
"I think I understand from my brothers and father that begging for someone love and pleading them to stop means nothing when they think of you as nothing. I know that moment that he lied and I was nothing but his play-thing". She said crying harder
"Then slap him, hit him, do something. I will stay beside you". He pleaded
She shakes her head, "Why should I?. It will only destroy his house and that girl's life. I am not someone who can bear the aftermath of my revenge".
"But-". He started but she turns around running into her room
He wanted to follow her but his boundaries didn't allow him.
"Leave her alone". His mother said sighing, "I think that was her closure".
He nodded looking at her closed door helplessly hoping that at very least she didn't harm herself as she did in the garden.
She didn't.
She felt it in her body that she was angry and her crying wasn't in pain like before it was in anger of her doing a sin that she shouldn't have done. She never went that forward but one of her friend introduced her to Sufiyaan and he started calling her which she was very scared about in the start.
Then he would bring her flowers and gifts convincing her since she had only heard about fantasy love and she never received any love she fell for him.
He was her first love.
But she wanted boundaries so all they did was talk on the phone and she never once went to meet him because she knew it was wrong even calling was wrong but she was tempted into it. She was feeling all these things after so many years that she didn't realise she shouldn't fall for these feelings.
She did fell deep into.
She remembers calling him crying that her father was arranging her marriage with one of her cousin who was not a good man and he blocked her. She thought he was in some issue or maybe finding ways to find her but the moment her father was coming to ask her acceptance for her cousin she ran away from her house.
She ran for hours heading to the taxi and going straight to his house only to find he was in a hall where he was supposed to be married to his love- that was what his guard told her.
She didn't believe it until she was standing at a far distance and he was standing and posing with a woman in his hand looking like the happiest man on earth.
That moment her little heart broke.
She realises that she wasn't worthy of love because she never found love in her family or outside. She was just his pass time and he just enjoyed that and then marry someone else. But her Lord loves her that was something she knows too so she went away from his wedding and found some goons on the way until she crashes in Waazi's car.
She remembers something that she was never comfortable about telling Sufiyaan about her abuse which was a rather different case in Waazi's case. Though she initially was embarrassed she didn't mind him knowing. Instead, it was far easier speaking to him and listening to him.
She wasn't in pain anymore.
She was just angry about her own sin because even when he betrayed her the relationship was wrong from the start and that is something she needs to ask forgiveness for. What's the use of ruining his already built life beside destroying three lives (her, his and his wife) and it was not worth it.
Revenge is never worth it.
Momentarily it seems like the best thing to do for the pain one has caused you however the aftermath is never good. Whatever one did we are no one either we are someone great to get back to them. We need to let some matters in our Lord's hands because he does it better than us.
"And those who, when tyranny strikes them, they defend themselves. And the retribution for an evil act is an evil one like it, but whoever pardons and makes reconciliation - his reward is [due] from Allah. Indeed, He does not like wrongdoers. And whoever avenges himself after having been wronged - those have not upon them any cause [for blame]. The cause is only against the ones who wrong the people and tyrannise upon the earth without right. Those will have a painful punishment. And whoever is patient and forgives - indeed, that is of the matters [requiring] determination [i.e. on the part of those seeking the reward of Allah]." [Quran 42: 39-43]
She has done enough sins that she wants to reconcile for so instead she started to pray for her forgiveness handing her matters to her Lord. She realises by the end of it her tears were only of forgiveness not even of anger.
The next day, she felt much lighter and better.
She wanted a new life.
"You look fresh?". He asked confused standing in the lounge with his file
She smiles sweetly, "I am just in peace".
"You will go with Ammi today to work. How do you feel about that?". He asked smiling at her glowing face
He was stressed the whole night thinking how and what he can say to lessen her pain. Instead, he decided to pray to his Lord all night for her peace.
Because peace is eternal.
"I am excited. I have never been able to work but I am sad that Ammi is sad because of Maham and her mother". She said sighing looking at her feet as she bounces
He couldn't help but smile more at her adorable actions and affection for his mother.
"It was his (Sufiyaan) loss". He mumbles to himself, "I am glad he is at loss".
"What?". She asked genuinely confused
"I am not sad, beta". His mother said coming down
It was something really great for both of them. Now his mother wears better clothes and dresses. She eats better and also roams around like a free woman.
"Why?". She asked
"Because I know that even the closest to us can hurt us and we need to accept it and move on. If I were to hold onto that pain for too long it will only hurt me so what's the use?. They will remain happy and relaxed while I ruin my life and health because of them. That's not how one should work". His mother said wisely kissing their head one by one, "Now we need to leave we have a long day".
"I dealt with the frauds". He said handing her the file, "These have the details and you can do what you like next. If you need me I am just one call away".
"Thank you, beta". His mother said smiling
They went to his mother bouquet and his mother was busy in meetings with everyone selecting and firing other people who were not following her values. Waazi managed to bring back the old staff so her mother made them supervisor of others.
"I want to show our cultural identities". She explained to her superiors, "We don't have to take anything of western instead we have to clear our heads and know that our culture is beautiful itself. I want to show that our values are not restraining- they are not forcing us to act in a certain way or live a forced life. Instead, our culture is open with so many different people, designs and ideas that one can explore into. I want to show that we don't need western ideas of freedom and woman power when we have an amazing woman in our society who changed so many things in a right way. It's our mind that is locked and we find western as open because they use the world freedom and shows it just being naked. But if you look closely you will find that indeed our values (Islamic) are more beautiful if correctly understood and applied".
They accept it.
She was able to convince if the hardest ones in the team and finally they all started working on the designs.
"Ah! My two ladies are now working harder than me should I feel threatened?". He said looking at them amazed as they squeal at his voice
"You scared me". His mother said placing a hand over her heart
He shrugged smiling, "I think we had an unsaid rule that we need to be home on time no matter what and have family time. Now I have to teach you this".
She giggles at his words watching his mother narrowing her eyes at him but then huffed instead.
"Bohat zubaan chalna shoro ho gai hai tumhari. Sabr karo apni bivi ko anay do phir phochon gi". His mother said playfully (You are speaking too much wait until your wife is here then I will ask you)
"Arey Ammi, a toh gai hai". He said smiling (She is already here)
His mother hit his arm,"Then man up and ask before I send her off to someone else".
"You wouldn't do that to your own son". He whispers to her pleading
"If my son is being an idiot for no reason I can become an evil mother for fun". His mother said smiling patting his cheeks walking away, "Your father said that once your heart knows what it wants don't waste time because that will only cause distance and more hesitation".
"I wish he was here to guide me". He said frowning
"He already did". His mother said smiling, "You just need to start working on it".
She looks at the mother-son duo as they talk among themselves and that was when her phone rings making her frown because no one has her new number.
She answers the call going a little farther from them.
"You think you ran away from our house we will allow you to live freely?". She heard her father booming voice and the phone fall from her hand crashing on the ground so did she
Their head turns towards her who looks like she has seen a ghost. His mother immediately moves towards her holding her hand.
She turns to look at his mother concerned eyes and then to his eyes.
"M-My father is coming for me". She said before she feels the world around her stopping
"What do you mean?". He asked worriedly
"He called me just now saying he will not leave me for running away". She explained
"We should leave it's not safe here". He said hurrying out of the office
They reached home.
The whole ride was nothing but silence and before anyone can speak she runs upstairs to her room. She knows they both have done enough for her and she cannot have anyone hurt them. The thought of them hurting because of her caused her more pain than she felt in her life.
She needs to leave.
Just like that, she waited until everyone was asleep and she was sure it was safe to leave now. She didn't have any belongings here beside her heart which will always stay here with them as she walks towards the door.
The moment she had her hand on the door she heard his voice.
"Can't you trust us this one time?".
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