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Jin's eyes grew wide with shock when he felt Jisung's lips on his. It was like a sudden electric current sending waves through his entire body, making it alive. The tongue was added and Jin was shocked to the bones by just how familiar and disgusting it felt. The taste of cigarettes was something Jin always hated, but his mint bubblegum eased the taste so it was bearable. Jin had to admit, that even with the taste of cigarettes, the kiss was really good. He caught himself returning the kiss. 

Encouraged by this, Jisung, who was some 10 centimetres taller than Jin, slowly pushed him back, never breaking the kiss, until Jin's back hit the wall behind him. The sudden confinement and the fact that he didn't know the man, no matter how familiar and good his kiss was, made Jin's mind flash the alarm.

-'' Jisung... stop...wait.'' - Jin tried between the kisses.

-'' I fucking missed you.'' - Jisung said, deepening the kiss, and Jin moaned. His body was covered with Jisung's and they fitted together so naturally. Both of them are getting excited and Jin didn't want that. He needed answers. He needed to stop.

-''  Stop!!!'' - Jin yelled and pushed him away. 

Jisung stumbled on his feet, slightly shocked, but quickly composed himself. His hand went to his lips as he panted hard. -'' Shit. I'm sorry, I went a bit overboard.''

Jin scoffed. - '' You think?''

Jisung looked apologetic. - '' I'm sorry, Baby Doll.''

That stupid nickname! It was driving Jin insane. - ''Stop calling me that. I'm not a Baby Doll, dammit!''

Jisung's eyes narrowed.

-'' Why? You always like it... like a lot.'' – Jisung said, standing in front of Jin again.

Jin's chest was rising and falling as he breathed fast. He was so electrified right now that he had no clue what do to. He wasn't sure if he wants to fight the man, fuck him or leave.

He chose neither, but inhaled deeply, holding a breath for a few seconds before letting it go.

-'' Please do not use it again.'' - He said calmly.

Jisung's brows furrow at that, but he nodded. - '' Alright, Jin. I'm sorry.''

Jin nodded the approval of the use of his name. Jisung licked his lips and took a deep sigh himself. He considers what to say. -'' I was just so surprised to see you again, that's all.'' - He said in the end. -'' I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm sorry. I lost control, It's just...''. – Jisung chuckled at himself, murmuring the rest of the sentence. – '' I always lose control when you are around.''

-'' You do?'' - Jin asked, quite intrigued. He couldn't remember a damn thing.

Jinsung waved his hand that it does not matter. - '' Just...sorry, ok?'' - He says.

Jin nods again. - ''It's fine.''

He didn't mind the kiss much as he did the fact that he enjoyed it more than he should have and would probably end up jumping and raping the man who kissed him so damn good. Which wasn't a bad thing. The man looked hot as hell, but Jin needed the answers. He was about to speak when Jisung beat him to it. 

-'' So, what brings you here, Jin?''

Jin breathed in frustration as he went through his hair with his hand. He didn't know how to start.

Jisung saw his nervousness and he signalled for Jin to sit at the nearby chair. Jin hesitated for a moment but decided that Jisung wouldn't do anything stupid again, so he sat on the sofa instead. Jisung smirked and took the chair himself, turning it around, so he could straddle it, leaning his hands on the top rail of the back.

The uncomfortable silence lasted for a minute or two in which none of them dared to speak. Suddenly lacking the courage, Jin gulped nervously, opening his mouth only to close them when no words came out. He felt frustrated as he observed the man opposite him. Finally, Jisung had enough of it and he tried to ease up this awkward situation with some light, but honest compliments.

-'' You haven't changed much since the last time we saw each other.'' - He spoke, tilting his head a bit to the side. -'' You are still absolutely gorgeous.'' - He smiles.

Jin offers a weak smile back, feeling a bit sheepish. -'' I wish I could say the same to you.'' - Realizing how that sounded and seeing Jisung's raised eyebrows as the smirk danced on his lips, Jin went on explaining more. -'' Not that you don't look good, because you do...damn you are hot as hell...''

Jisung burst out laughing at this. - ''Jin, why are you so nervous?'' - He asked, and then added jokingly to ease up the tension. -'' What, I'm I getting too old now?''

 Jin's eyes went wider and he looked ever more adorably confused. -'' Oh no, no, no Hying, it's not that.''

-'' Oh, at least I'm Hyung still.'' - Jisung said with a slightly bitter melancholy tone. He said it so quietly that Jin almost didn't catch that. 

-'' I'm sorry.'' - Jin paused. -'' Shouldn't I call you...?''

Jisung's eyes shined appreciatively. - '' You should.'' - He said it strongly. - '' I'm forever your Hyung, Bab...Jin.'' 

Jin watched him for a few heartbeats, casting his eyes down to the worried hands in his lap. 

-'' Jin?'' - Jisung called. - '' Jin, look at me. What's wrong?'' 

Jin's chin wobbled slightly, as his breath wavered.– '' I don't really remember you.'' - He finally admits. He watched Jisung's face narrow in slight confusion. He breathes in and tries again. -'' The thing is...I can't remember...''

There was a silence, and then Jisung asked, his tone much more serious than before. -'' You can't remember what?'' 

-'' Life, you...'' Jin started again. – ''My life... in the past four years... I don't...'' - He struggled not to cry. I will not cry, dammit. He scolded himself and cleared his throat. - '' I don't remember the last four years... like at all.''

Jisung's mouth opened in shock.- '' You are fucking with me now don't you?'' - He asks incredulously. 

Jin shakes his head. -'' I'm afraid not.'' - He says. -'' I really don't remember anything since...well... I was trying to figure it out for the past year, but three years before that were just blank.''

-'' How?'' – Jisung was utterly shocked right now.

-'' I don't know that either.'' - Jin shrugged his shoulders. - '' It seemed like I had some accident or something. I woke up in a tub in a hotel room in Shinjuku, with no memory of what happened to me or how I got there in the first place.''

-'' A tub?'' - If Jisung was confused before, he was utterly lost now.

-'' Don't ask, I don't know that myself.'' - Jin waved his hand in dismissal. -'' You can't believe the shock and panic I went through as I found myself in an unfamiliar place with no memory of how I got there in the first place.'' - He chuckles. - '' Not to mention when I realised that I did not blackout for a day or two, but for three years. Three years!'' - He stressed the word. - '' I thought I was having a really fucked up nightmare, but it turned out to be real.''

-'' Well, fuck.'' – Jisung swore quietly, running a hand through his hair. –'' Fuck.''- He cursed again and then realizes something. -'' But you did remember me? You are here after all.'' - He says hopefully, which diminished drastically when Jin started shaking his head in no.

-'' Not exactly.''  – Jin took a large breath and then went on explaining. - ''You see, I found out about you from someone I once knew, so I dug a little. I hired a private investigator to check if there were some connections and he found you. So... I came to see you. I needed to know if it's true... that you know me I mean.. so maybe you could give me at least some answers to a million questions I have.''

Jisung was silent for a long time, his eyes never left Jin's face as if trying to see if he was playing him or he was telling the truth. -'' I need a drink.'' – He said suddenly and stood up from the chair, walking towards the door, but before he walk through it, he stopped, head turning to look at Jin. –'' You seemed like you needed one too.'' - And then left to the other room.

He returns three minutes later with some sake and two mugs.

-'' I closed the shop for today, it was time anyway. No one will disturb us that way.'' - He says, offering the mug to Jin to hold. He poured the liquid in. - '' Sorry for the mugs, but I have nothing else.''

Jin smiled. - '' That's ok, a mug is just fine.''

Jisung nodded, poured one for himself, and then went to sit next to Jin on the sofa. He raised the mug in salute. -'' Geonbae.'' - He says.

-'' Cheers.'' - Jin says, raising a mug as well before taking a sip of the liquid.

Jin couldn't look him in the eyes. He was nervous, not knowing what Jisung has to say about him and his past. He was conflicted between wanting and not wanting to know. What if he did something terrible? What if there was a reason to forget it all? Jin wondered. He could feel the man's gaze on him, studying him. Jin kept his eyes cast down when the sound of the ceramics touched the wooden desk, signalling that the mug was placed on the nearby table.

-'' Jin. Look at me.'' – Jisung said gently and the breath caught up in his lungs, his nerves tingled down his spine and he grew fidgety. 

-'' Look at me.'' – The voice was now more dominant. There was a finger under Jin's chin, raising it up until he felt the full force of Jisung's strong gaze. Jin blinked a few times, looking elsewhere, but Jisung placed both of his palms on Jin's cheeks, gently forcing him to look only at him.

-'' Jin, let me see if I could help you.''  – Jisung said and Jin gasped from the sudden emotion he felt. There was honesty and affection in Jisung's voice, even though he seemed cold and unapproachable on the outside.

Jisung lowered his hands from Jin's face and took a hold of Jin's hand instead, supporting him. Jin was always gentle, and sweet. His feelings were always an issue. Jisung remembered how much he suffered every time from heartache. Joy and he always tried to make Jin feel good. He was like a beautiful boy, innocent and adorable on the outside, but kinky and naughty on the inside. Jisung loved him for it, he loved that duality in him. 

Jin never came to him unless he needed sex or help and since he pushed him away a few moments ago, it was obvious that he was not here because of that. It all became clear when Jin told him what happened. Even Jisung felt slight nervousness, but he was good at poker, so he hid it nicely. 

-'' You mention someone from the past that you knew?''- Jisung prompted Jin to start talking. -'' Do they know me?''

-'' Oh...'' - Jin wasn't sure what and how much to divulge. - '' It was someone I knew. A guy.''

-'' Who was he?''- There was a slight hope when he asked that like he expect to hear a familiar name.  

-'' Umm, his name is Hwan.''

Jisung's brows furrowed. -'' Hwan? Woo Do Hwan?'' - He asks with a doze of disapproval.

Jin blinks a few times. -'' You know him?''

Jisung snorted, not amused. - '' Yes, I do. You talked about that bastard for months.'' '' - He says with a slight doze of venom. - '' Did you spit in his face when you saw him again?'' - He asked.

Woah. How much he knows? Jin wondered.

-'' N-no.'' - Jin muttered. - '' I haven't remembered him, at first.'' - He says carefully, watching Jisung's face. 

-'' And after?'' - Jisung wanted to know.

Jin knew it wasn't a good idea to tell Jisung what have happened between Hwan and him a while ago, so he kept that information to himself. Instead, he straightened, puffing his chest a bit and said. - '' Once I remembered, I simply didn't care about him anymore.''

-'' Good.'' - Jisung exhaled sharply through his nose. - '' After everything he's done to you, he doesn't deserve anything from you.''

Jin huffs. - '' Yeah, well... we met and he explained everything, so we parted without ill blood.''

Jisung's brows rose up. - '' You forgave him?'' 

Jin nodded. - '' Yeah, I did. It was a long time ago...and plus, we won't be seeing each other again, so...''

-'' Hmm...'' – Jisung hummed in annoyance, shaking his head. –'' You never change Baby D...fuck, sorry. You are still way too forgiving, Jin.''

Jin was annoyed. -'' What's up with everyone and stupid nicknames?'' 

Jisung looks at him, and Jin went on venting. - '' First Hwan, now you! You all kept calling me different variations of the word ''Baby'', why? I get that I have that young look, but damn, I don't act like a baby at all! I'm not some whiny baby for you to take care of!''

He was breathing hard by the time he finished his tirade. Jisung just looked at him calmly.

-'' Well, you used to be a brat, I have you say.'' - He said in a drawling voice. - '' You used to whine to get what you want, and I have no clue about what kinky shit you and Hwan played, but with me, you always loved it when I call you that ''stupid'' nickname. It always turned you on.''

That made Jin flush from head to toe. -'' Have...have we slept, as well?''

Jisung laughed. A nice long wholehearted laugh. Jin just stared at him.

-'' Ah, sorry.'' - Jisung looks at him apologetically. - ''But did the kiss from a few moments ago gave you any insight into the nature of our relationship in the past?''

-'' Oh my God.'' – Jin gasped ad Jisung grinned amusingly.

Seeing Jin's lost face, he grew serious again. -'' Just how much DO you remember, Jin?''

How much indeed.

-'' I don't know.'' - He answers, quite at the loss. - '' What I mean is, I don't remember anything after my prom night, or at least I think it was my prom.''

-'' That doesn't make any sense to me.'' - Jisung said, confused.

Well, that is two of us then. Jin huffed inwardly. - '' Listen, the past is foggy, and some things are jumbled, I'm still trying to figure out where it begins and where ends, not the mention the middle.'' - He pauses to gather his thoughts. -'' All I remembered was that a friend of mine...''

-'' Not Hwan, surely?'' - Jigung interjected.

-'' No. Not Hwan. I said, a friend.''

-'' Gotcha, sorry, please continue.''

Jin gave him a glare because of the interruption but went on. - ''A friend of mine...'' - He stressed the word. - ''...found me in the hotel room in Shinjuku and brought me back to Seoul last year.'' - He stated more for his sake than Jisung's. He tried not to lose any treads of his already broken story.-'' I met Hwan by accident and he told me what happened to him and me, but only that. He said he wasn't in my life for long and that what happened to me before that and after was always unknown to him. He did, however, mentioned your name. ''

-'' Why? We never met.'' - Jisung was puzzled.

-'' He heard some gossip and my name involved.'' - Jin saw Jisung's face go sour. - '' He said it was connected to you somehow.''

-'' Ah, good old gossip.''  – Jisung said sarcastically, propping himself more comfortably on the sofa and taking a sip of his drink. - '' Want another?'' - He asks.

Jin nods, and he went on to fill the mugs.

-'' Thanks. So...what was the gossip?'' - Jin asked, his eyes burning with curiosity, and then he remembers. - ''My parents moved out of that neighbourhood in that period. Was it because of that scandal?'' – Jin asked fearfully. -'' Was it because of me?'' - He adds quietly.

Jisung sighs and nods. -'' Unfortunately, yes.''

Jin's heart stops at that. -'' Please.'' - He begs. -'' Please tell me what happened.''

Jisung sighs again. -'' Why don't you finish your drink, so that I could pour you another one, you will need it.'' – He said, swallowing the drink in one take.

Jin looks in his mug, the liquid only two fingers filled, so he drinks it. He makes a face of the burning sensation and offers it to be refiled.

-'' I think it's for the best to start from the beginning.'' - Jisung said, taking the pack of cigarettes from the table. - '' We'll work our way to the scandal, I promise.'' -  He took one out, put it between his lips and lighted it. He took a deep calming draw of the smoke, filling his lungs and then let it out in a long exhale. He sat more comfortably by crossing his legs under. 

-'' Now, let's start from the beginning. You have questions. Shoot.''

Jin sat up straighter, feeling nervous, not knowing what to ask first. - '' Umm, okay, how did we meet?''

-'' Namjoon introduced us.'' - Jisung answered, taking another drag of his cigarette.

Jin's brow furrowed in confusion. -'' Namjoon?''

Jisung's face showed surprise. -'' Oh man, you don't remember Namjoon either?'' - He asks in disbelief and Jin shook his head. 

Jisung sighed in slight irritation. - '' Alright I'll tell you about him later. Anyway, Joy and I met you through him. Joy was my girlfriend.'' - He explained when he noticed that Jin don't remember her either. - '' We were both in a very relaxed relationship, seeing other people, usually together, so we quickly started a relationship with you as well.''

Jin gulped. –'' M-me? Both of you...together? With me?''

Jisung snorts. -'' Yes. Look, I know it sounds crazy, but that's what we were at the time, the three of us.''

Jin decided not to go in deeper into their threesome relationship just yet and instead focus on one question that was eating him alive for the past year and needed to be dealt with, no matter how dreadful the answer might be.

-'' Hyung, tell me, please. What did I do? Why did my parents move away and never called me again?''

Jisung didn't answer him right away, but took another intake of smoke, exhaling it through his nose, before he spoke. -'' Your father came on us one day. The three of us, while we had sex.'' - He clarified. -'' We were in your room, and the sex just sort of happened, we didn't plan it. You told us that your parents were out for a few hours, but your father returned earlier than you expected.''

Jisung took a pause and Jin closed his eyes at that, not wanting to hear more, but he had to know. - ''Tell me everything... please...'' - He added pleadingly.

Jisung sighed. - ''Well...it wasn't nice.'' - He said. - '' He kicked us out and got in a huge fight with you, so you came to live with us.''

-'' What?'' - Jin said breathlessly, not wanting to believe that his father would kick him out because of this. - '' He...he kicked me out because I had sex?'' - Jin asked in a teary voice.

Jisung shook his head. -'' He didn't kick you out, you left.''

-'' But, why...?''

-'' I believe it was the fact that I had my dick buried deep down your ass that terrified your father the most, then the fact that you, an eighteen-year-old, had a threesome with an older tattooed guy and a girl in your teen room, on your Super Mario bed sheets, on a school day.'' - Jisung said while taking a sip of sake. He went to pour another. - '' Having Joy sprawled under you as you fucked her seemed not to comfort your father in the least. I would have thought that the sight of a girl wouldn't send him in the instant thought that his son was gay but more experimental.'' - He added more to himself. - '' But he proved me wrong.''

Jin gaped at him round-eyed with hands on his mouth as if to stop himself from screaming. -'' Oh my God.'' – Jin buried his face in his hand, wailing in embarrassment. – ''He was disgusted with me?''

Jisung didn't say anything and that was a confirmation Jin needed to really start crying. -'' Did they move because I was gay?'' - He asks through teary eyes.

-'' No.'' - Jisung shook his head. - ''And you are not gay.''

-'' But...''

-'' Having a dick rammed up your ass, doesn't make you gay.'' - He says matter-of-factly.

Jin jumped at that. - ''Dammit, stop saying dick and ass and ... fuck!''

Jisung chuckles. -'' Well, it's the truth. Anyway, they moved because of the embarrassment you caused them later on.'' - He says, huffing a smoke from his nose. - '' We didn't know what are you about to do, or we would have stooped you, but you got drunk one day and went to your father's work, yelling at him for not accepting you just because you enjoying being fucked by men and all that shit.''

-'' Oh, no!'' – A sob escaped Jin's lips. – '' Oh, fuck...no...you are messing with me.''

Jisung let a sad chuckle. -'' Hah, I wish.''

-'' Oh, how could I do that!?'' - Jin cried.

Jisung took his hand. -'' You were drunk.''

-'' That's not an excuse!'' - Jin jumped, suddenly angry at himself, tears kept falling down his cheeks. –'' It's not a fucking excuse. Oh my God! Fuck!'' - He buried the face in his hands. -'' Oh, how much I must have embarrassed him, I ruined their life. Fuuuck...''

The sobs shook his entire body, Jisung let him cry for a moment and then thought it was best to lay out everything bad and then let him cry his heart out. He needs it.

-'' Needless to say...'' - He said when Jin's sobs quieted a bit. -'' Everybody heard you. All of his co-workers and it's just spread. The scandal. The rumour, you know how it goes.'' - He sighs tiredly, remembering that hard time for them all. - '' They moved after that, cutting all of their connections with you. Your mother was really sad, she tried to contact you, but your father stopped it. Namjoon was pretty angry at you as well. You didn't just ruin your reputation, but ours as well. We moved to Japan because of you.''

Jin's huge sad eyes found him. -'' Oh my God, I am so sorry! I am so fucking sorry.'' – Jin cried heavily now.

Jisung felt sorry for Jin and after putting out his cigar in the ashtray, he engulfed Jin in a tight embrace. He pulled him on top of him so they both lay on the sofa now. Jin buried his face in Jisung's chest and opened his soul to the sadness he felt, to the pain. He cried for his parents, and for himself. He just...cried.

And Jisung just held him closer, remembering the old times and countless occasions when he held him like that, protectingly and comfortingly. He felt such love towards the man in his arms. The young boy he ones knew. 

Just like before...some things indeed never change. He thinks.

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Some things finally start to make sense, so stay tuned for more...