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Jin kept on walking on the lonely road. It was a desolate place. The darkness was suffocating. Jin had no idea how many hours he walked, his legs were hurting him and he was thirsty. His mouth was dry he could not swallow from dryness. It was only after a while that he saw a light...red and pink colour glass. He went to it, hoping that it was a sort of café or something, where he could ask for help, or at least find some water. But as he approached, he saw that it was a music shop, selling classical instruments.

The door was open, even though no one was there. Jin entered it anyway, not knowing why. He needed water badly. The shop was small. It had very few instruments in it, but it was neat. Jin saw the smaller door at the back with the red light. He went there, opening the door slowly. He wanted to call out to someone, but his throat was so dry that nothing came out. It was like he felt the pull towards it. The calling...

He saw a long darkness in front of him and another red light at the end of the very long and very dark corridor. He felt fear, he wanted to escape, but he didn't know where. The idea of roaming the streets in darkness was less inviting that this hall in front of him. At least there was a light. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment, before stepping into darkness. He walked and walked. The light at the end of the hall seemed to be further and further. He turn back to see the other red light he just left was also very far. It seemed that he was in the middle of the hall. The fear gripped him. He couldn't see anything from left to right. The nerves tingled through his entire body, creating an illusion that someone is watching him. The feeling was too intense, so he ran.

He ran as it was his life in stake. His heart was ready to jump out of his skin and he would scream if he could. He reached the red light finally and looked back into the darkness, only to see that the red light on another side was turned off. He shuddered as he slid around the corner, far away from the place he just ran from. He never felt fear so big, so intense. He didn't know what awaits him in front, but he knew that nothing good is lurking in the darkness, so he kept on walking, entering another hall, shabby and abandoned. The walls and floor were old and scratched, ripped almost. A small dusty chair and broken table were on the opposite sides, while a few paintings full of dust hang from the walls askew. Suddenly there is a rumbling sound like something was ripping apart and breaking. Jin felt vibrations on his feet so he turned only to see that the floor started to fall down. He bolted straight forward, trying to reach the stairs at the end of the hall, nearly escaping the toppling floor.

He barely made it, running up the steep stairs, until he was at the top. He saw the floor disappearing at the bottom of the stairs and the hall he just left became dark. Jin sat on the stair, trying to catch his breath. He was panting heavily and sweating, running a hand across his forehead to brush the wet bangs from entering his eyes. He shook, not knowing where he was or how he got here. He couldn't go back, only forward. Once he regained some stability, he stood up and went down the corner into yet another hall. What is with this maze of corridors and halls? Is there an end to it? He was constantly feeling like someone is walking behind him, but whenever he turned, there was no one there. After a while, Jin finally accepted that the unpleasant feeling exists only in his head.

Suddenly the shadow came to view, as someone was approaching from the front. Jin was wondering how that rambling and crushing sound of the room beneath them, where the stairs crumbled, didn't attract anyone yet. Well...it did now. Jin wasn't ready to meet whomever that shadow belongs to. He wanted to hide, but there was nowhere to be hidden. He tapped the walls, seeking the hidden door, but there was none. He also considered going back, but only darkness awaited him there. The shadow was getting bigger and bigger.

Jin waited in fear and was frantically preparing a speech of how and why he was there in the first place and was ready to beg for his life when he saw a man approaching him. He was lean, of average height, handsome and very pretty. Jin blinked a few times and to his surprise, he saw – Jimin.

-'' J-Jiminie!'' – He croaked weekly, his heart still bumping in his chest. – ''Jiminie...w-what are you doing here? Where...where are we?''

Jimin didn't reply. He just kept walking towards him.

-'' Jiminie...you are scaring me...where are we?'' - Jin wanted to know. He needed at least some answers. He was so scared and confused as to why he was here in the first place. -''  Why...why are you're not saying anything? Say something, please.'' -He begged, but Jimin just drew nearer and nearer.

-'' Jiminie! Fuck...Jimin!'' – Jin pinned himself to the wall, sinking to the ground, tears falling down his face, he was crying in fear. -'' Jiminah! Say something! Please!'' – He screamed at him and Jimin stopped, watching him.

Jin shook and cried. The fear gripped him tightly, he couldn't move. Jimin only stared at him when strange piano music echoed from somewhere. Jimin craned his neck to listen, closing his eyes and humming with it. Jin looked at him transfixed.

He turned his head a little to look to his right then look at Jin again. -'' Hyung....come....'' - Was the first thing he said. His voice was lifeless and monotone, the complete opposite of Jin's frantic one.

-'' W-where are we going Jimin? ''

-'' Come...''  - He said it again and turned to go back. Jin hesitated for a moment before he took a tentative step to follow Jimin.

They walked. Taking turns here and there, going up the stairs and through some corridors with doors. The door on his right opened with a creaking sound, revealing the pink room. There was a girl standing in the middle. Her long dark hair wavered on a non-existent wind. She turned slowly as a gorgeous elf and Jin shivered.

-'' Joy?'' - He said, voice wavering.

She started walking slowly towards the door. Her face was serious while she moved like a cat.

-'' You broke him...'' - She purred in a deep feminine voice. – '' You left...'' - Her voice grew sinister. - '' You left Jungkookie to die...''

Jin was shaking. -'' No, no...no I didn't, Joy...it was V, not me...''

-'' You did!'' – She screamed suddenly. – '' You! And only you!''

She screamed at him again when the door shut, drowning her screams with it. Jin was petrified, his heart wanted to jump from his chest.

It feels like an eternity that he stood there, but it could have been only a moment, Jin didn't know, but a sudden whisper made him jump again. -'' Hyung...''

It was Jimin. He waited for him at the end of the hall. Jin hurried up to catch him, but before he managed to do so, he heard a squealing sound behind him. He turned and gasped. Out of the dark, came a wheelchair. The squealing wheel echoed in the darkness. On it, was Jungkook.

-'' K-Kookie...''  - Jin choked weakly.

Jungkook looked at him, staring intently, disapprovingly.

-'' V...'' - He raven-haired boy said.

Jin widened his eyes in shock. His heart ached at the sight of his little brother. Then the realization hit him. He said V's name. When did he meet V? Did V go visit him later on?

-'' V... ''- He said again, pointing at Jin who turned behind himself to see if V didn't suddenly appear, but it was only Jimin.  Jin turned back to Jungkook but discovered that he and his wheelchair weren't there any longer, only darkness. Jin shuddered violently.

-'' Kookie!'' – Jin yelled, desperately wanting him to return. He had so much to say to him, to apologize. He needed him.

-'' Hyung... '' - Jimin called in a flat, lifeless voice. He wanted Jin to follow him. The other two were distractions and Jimin would have none of that.  -'' Come.'' - He said and Jin reluctantly went with him.

They went forward, walking toward another room. Jimin stopped to let Jin go in first. Jin entered the nicely decorated room, covered with moonlight. The piano melody has been heard, the same one that V used to hum to him whenever he was upset. There was the door that led into another room, surrounded by candlelight. Jin wanted to go there, but before he could turn to see where Jimin is, the wall behind him rotated.

Jin shrieked and run towards the door, now on the right. He opened it, but only the brick wall was there.

-'' Jiminie!!!'' – He shouted. – ''Jiminieeeeee!!!! Don't leave me here alone!!! Jiminieeee!!!''

There was no response. Jin turned, banging at the wall. – '' Jiminie!!!'' – But nothing could be heard of except for the music. He reluctantly turned, willing his heart to calm down, so it will not explode from how fast he was beating. He wanted to cry again. All the nerves in his body were on high alert and he was wide awake. Slowly and carefully he took a step towards the music room. The room was filled with candles. In the middle, there was a huge black concert piano.

-'' H-Hyung?'' – Jin recognized Jisung playing it. He was smoking a cigarette, and a thick gust of smoke was leaving his mouth, while his fingers played on the piano tiles.

Jin came closer, placing an arm on his shoulder, but Jisung didn't respond. He was in a trance. Jin lifted his hand from him like he was burned. It was at that moment that he glanced at a sheet of music paper with notes on it. "The Tale of a Butterfly" was the name of the melody Jisung was playing. At least Jin thought he was. He could play anything really and jIn wouldn't know, because he never learned how to read notes.

Something else drew his attention. It was the flickering light down the hall. He went there. Another hall...another maze...but this time there was a small fragrance of lilies in the air. The painting on the wall showed a black bird with spread wings. Jin looked for a moment, admiring its simplicity and artistry before he turned the corner.

He found himself at a museum of sorts with a big white statue of a kneeling man with huge black wings. He never saw anything like that before. He was drawn to it by its beauty when a small movement caught his eye. He turned his head only to catch the glimpse of his own reflection in a huge mirror. He watched himself confusingly when suddenly he felt long slender fingers covering his eyes.

-'' Aaaah, my darling Jinnie.''

Jin's heart stopped. -'' V...''

-'' My precious...'' - The man pressed his body at Jin's back, engulfing him in his embrace. 

Jin felt a sudden relief. V is here. Everything is gonna be alright now. He thought. He felt V's lips on his neck, kissing him and his knees grew weak. V was holding him tightly.

-'' V...'' - Jin called him weakly. There was so much he wanted to tell him, ask him, beg him. He wanted him to know just how much he needs him. 

-'' Hush, Jinnie...'' - He breathed in Jin's ear, making him shudder. – '' There is an ending to all things...'' - He spoke calmly. - '' And I'll be waiting for you there.''

And with that, the hands moved and Jin discovered he was in a different room. The statue was gone...V was gone...but the scent of lilies remained.

He turned only to see Hoseok sitting on the sofa, eyeing him. Jin heard a muffled grunt on his left. There, in a small room was a man bound to a chair, struggling to set himself free with screams and curses.

Jin tried to help him, but he couldn't move.

-'' Hobi! Help him! Hurry!''

-'' Who?'' – Hobi asked in a very calm and wise voice.

-'' Him!'' – Jin points at the struggling man. - '' He needs help!''

Hoseok turns his head so, so slowly to look at the place Jin was pointing. -'' I don't see anyone...'' - He says when his eyes returned back to Jin.

-'' Hoseok, he is there...right there!'' - Jin was shouting now, still pointing with his finger. His legs didn't want to cooperate and make a step and he grew more and more frustrated. -'' There, on your right...struggling...can't you see!?''

Hobi's gaze was so calm that it was almost chilling. -'' But Seokjin, I can't.'' - He says, tilting his head to the side. -'' There is no one else in this room besides you and me.''

-'' What are you fucking saying?!'' - Jin was cursing now. Is he joking!? Is he trying to make Jin crazy!? Well, fuck you! He shouts in his mind. Fuck, fucking fuck, this is a nightmare...a bloody dream.

The lights turned suddenly off and Jin screamed. He looked frantically around, seeing only a window filled with colours and a dark silhouette. He wasn't sure whether that, whoever it was, was watching him or the colours.

-'' Hoseok? Hobi is that you?'' – Jin called and went towards it tentatively. As he approached, the lights flicked back on and the man turned to look at him. It was Namjoon.

-'' Namjoon...Fuck...'' - Jin took a step back from a sudden hateful glare Namjoon threw his way.

-'' My parents die because of you!'' - Namjoon boomed.

And Jin knew he was right. It was his fault. He could only say he is sorry, while the tears streamed down his face from all these emotions he was feeling. This wasn't like memory flashes... not like a dream either...this was like a spell, designed perfectly to break him completely.

Namjoon eyes looked so cold, so lifeless that Jin was petrified. He wanted to say something more but was interrupted.

-'' Jinnie Hyung...Come with me... I want to go... ''- His voice echoed through the room. This sentence was chilling his blood all over again. He heard it so many times in his mind...that damn sentence... He wanted to scream.

Escaping Namjoon's icy look, he went in search of Tae and found him in a place filled only with silken pink drapes. Or was it the light that made them pink? Jin wasn't sure.

-'' Come with me...'' - Taehyung called playfully.

Jin jumped and started running towards his friend. -'' Tae! I'm coming with you...I'm coming...'' - He wanted to touch him, and hug him, to kiss his cheeks and say he was sorry. Taehyung was smiling at him drowsily. 

- ''You'll come to the party with me?'' - The boy asked happily.

-'' Yes yes.'' - Jin was running towards him, but it was like he ran in place. Taehyung was still out of reach. -'' Don't worry, Tae. I will come...I will come. I will Tae, I will...'' He shouted, but Tae just let a joyful ''Yey!'' and ran away happily.

-'' He said he will come!''  – Tae shouted amusingly. – '' Noona, he said he will come with me!''

Jin looked at the place Tae ran, towards the female figure, leaning on the wall. Jin couldn't see her clearly, because she was in the shadows. He could only see the gleam of the broken glass shimmering on the floor. She was standing on it, grinding it with her heel, making it crunch under her weight. He tried to take a glimpse of her face, when a crow flew from the shadows, straight towards Jin, scaring the wits out of him. He could feel the feathery wings flapping against his face, so he covered his head with his hands the best he could, feeling the claws clawing on his skin, drawing blood. He didn't move until the attack stopped. He peaked under his arms, only to find out that he was all by himself.

-'' Tae Tae!''  – He shouted, but only an echo of "He said he will come! Come...come...come..." kept bouncing through the halls. He examined his bloodied hands, licking his cuts clean with his tongue. The combined taste of blood, sweat and tears in his mouth made him dizzy, so he quickly brushed his hands on his pant's the best he could. 

He heard laughter and saw Hoseok again. He was still sitting on the sofa, but this time he was holding the bottle of pills.

-'' Come, Hyung, have a seat.''  – He said and Jin reluctantly obeyed.

-'' Have you seen Tae, Hobi?''

-'' I saw no one, only you.'' - Hoseok answered.

-'' Hobi, please.'' – Jin begged.

Hoseok raised his eyebrow and smirked. A small dimple showed on one of his cheeks. If there wasn't for his burning eyes, Jin would have thought him cute.

-'' Hyung, you are fighting it too much...it's time to let go.'' - Hoseok said cheerfully.

Jin shakes his head, tears flowing down his face. -'' I can't...I tried...I can't...''

-'' Yes, you can, Hyung... look...'' - Hobi says and pour the pills into a bowl of steaming water, which evaporated into rainbow smoke.

-'' The acceptance is the key, Hyung.'' - He adds. -'' Accept it...and live free...''

Jin was rocking back and forward, arms wrapped tightly around himself as he cried. -'' I can't...fuck, I tried...every single time I've tried and failed... I fail...''

-'' Hyung...you can...'' - Hoseok smiled, watching the smoke and taking a deep breath of it, the colourful smoke filling his lungs and he gave radiant smile.

-'' No...no....'' - Jin was still shaking his head, when a slow, but deliberate footsteps echoed from the shadows. Jin's eyes grew wild when he saw Namjoon approaching, carrying the wine glass filled with green liquid.

-'' What is that?'' – Jin asked, squirming in his seat. Hobi just sat there with his eyes closed in his own Hope world full of colours, while Namjoon kept approaching. Finally, he stood behind Jin, placing his free hand on the back of Jin's neck to keep him steady, while he nudged the glass to Jin's lips.

Jin shook his head. -'' N-no...no I don't want it... don't m-make me...'' - Jin tried to move away from it, but Namjoon's grip was too strong. He whined in tears again. -'' No, Namjoon, don't!! No!!''

The glass hit Jin's upper teeth as the liquid poured down Jin's throat.

Jin coughed and tried to spill it out, but Namjoon was strong. -'' Swallow...'' - It was a command and Jin felt dizzy and light-headed.

His entire body went limp. He just fell backwards on something soft. He didn't know where he is now. He just knew that he was falling. The feeling of losing the grip of his sanity abandoned it a long time ago and he was drifting among the colours and shapes.

Jin felt like was flowing among the smoke, among the colours, through coldness and warmth...through light and darkness. The fear he felt left him. He felt nothing, but bliss.

It was like he could breathe again after a long suffocating stale air in the small box. It was maddening.

V's lullaby filled his ears again and soft hands engulfed him into protecting embrace from his back. It was V again.

-'' V...don't let go...'' - Jin murmured, with half-lidded eyes.

-'' Never...'' - Came a velvety whisper. -'' You are mine and I'm yours...'' - V purred in Jin's ear.

-'' Are you telling the truth this time?'' - Jin asked, suddenly anxious. He didn't want to be left alone again. He didn't want V to leave him. Not ever! -'' You won't leave me, right?''

He heard V's deep seductive laugh. -'' I can't live without you, my love.'' - He says and Jin gasps.

...

Jin was jerked from his sleep. The weird, nerve-wracking dream still had him gripped. He could still feel V's arms around him, and the warm breath on his ear. He had goosebumps all over his skin and he felt sweaty and too hot. It took him a few seconds until his mind accepted the fact that he was on the plane, flying back home.

-'' Sir. Are you alright?'' – The stewardess asked with concern. – '' You seemed to be having a nightmare, so I tried to wake you. I hope that's alright.''

Jin let out a sigh of relief. It was a dream, thank God. -'' Oh yes...yes, thank you... I just...thank you.'' – Jin mumbled thankfully.

-'' Would you like me to bring you something to drink?'' - She asks.

Jin thinks for a moment. He really needed something burning to reset him right now. -'' What's the strongest you have on this plane?'' - He asks, running a hand through his damp hair.

-'' Whiskey.'' - She answers.

-'' Great.'' - Jin nods. -'' Double. Please.''

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I hope this wasn't so confusing for you to read, but in a way, you get to glimpse into Jin's confused mind. As you can see a lot of fear and confusion are involved because that's what Jin is. He is still confused and scared. He is still not ready to let go, no matter how strong he appeared to some. He still desperately holds a tight grip on the past and welcomes the pain like an old friend.

Maybe some of you noticed while reading that some words are different from the others...more...bolder...For those you didn't, why don't you go back and check them out...you might discover something.

I hope you enjoyed...till the next chapter 💖