SCENE VII.
SOL
sol is my favorite note.

"YOO."

︎ ︎ A lone voice lingered that night, coming from a balcony from across hers.

︎ ︎ "Yes?"

︎ ︎ "To you...." He paused. "What musical note am I?"

︎ ︎ Yerim placed her pen down upon the notebook, reciting all the notes in her head as she hummed along and mended her seating position. She was growing tired of squatting and after she shifted her position, she felt a familiar strong sensation flourishing from her legs she always hated.

︎ ︎ "Sol."

︎ ︎ Jungwon raised his brows. "What?"

︎ ︎ "Sol. You're a sol." Saying the note for the last time, she sang along.

︎ ︎ "Why?"

︎ ︎ Why? Even Yoo Yerim asked herself. For a year, Yerim hasn't played any musical instrument even though she loved to nor was she attending classes related to such, which quite explained why her memory of the notes wasn't exactly as accurate as she thought. She has only been involved in school journal activities as well as academic ones, which never once included the study of music. But in fact, she was correct. Her doubt merely conquered her, making her thoughts debate.

︎ ︎ Yet as she hummed one more time, it was sol that reminded her of Jungwon the most.

︎ ︎ "I don't know? Sol sounds like something— something that always sounds like it has a lot to learn about itself." Finally, she answered, simply saying everything she felt like is eligible for her mouth to say and her mind to compromise. "At the same time, sol is a joyful note, an eager note that's always ready to reach for la, ti, and do. Whenever I hear it, it makes me feel like the welcoming spring and summer are coming."

︎ ︎ "Oh." Jungwon looked away, either content or disrupted by her answer. He once again began humming the tunes he made up.

︎ ︎ "Also, I like Sol! Sol is my favorite note. You're my favorite character. See the resemblance?"

︎ ︎"Hmm."

︎ ︎ Jungwon continued like her words never mattered to him in some way or another (when in fact it did), playing with the random notes on his laptop as Yerim only stared at him, resting her head on her inner elbow with her hand reaching Jungwon's balcony. As for Yerim, it was rather unfortunate for such an in-depth matter to be disregarded by him, most especially, but it didn't make much of a difference to how she saw him from that perspective. How ethereally pleasing he looked when the wind blew, causing his dark hair to sail along. She had the urge to compliment him, but it would simply imply another dismissed significance of words.

︎ ︎ Wait, no. The woman silently contemplated recognizing what tumbled out of her mouth the passing instant, longing to utter the unutterable essence of refutal.

︎ ︎ Yet he was very much within the hands of his own rapture to even care now.

︎ ︎ Although Yerim could not read his mind and go through every cell within this void, she was known to have great reading comprehension skills, not only in literal terms but as well as people's faces. This willingness and deprivation of concentration of his were expressed in a form of passiveness.

︎ ︎︎ ︎ "Yang, I wanna ask something too." Yerim raised her head, remembering something she's been meaning to ask him for a very long time. "Since I'll be going out every now and then and I don't have my phone with me for us to notify each other about our whereabouts, do you maybe have something you no longer use that I can use?"

︎ ︎ The man took off his earphones from his ears, signifying that he was no longer hiding from her.

︎ ︎ He's had enough of stashing, of letting an invisible obstacle hinder them, of the useless— little disputes they would have whenever things are out of place. He's had enough of doubting her when she seemed like she was a daughter of sincerity, of allowing himself to be the antagonist of the story, when all he was wanting to do, at the end of the day, was to comprehend her. Jungwon realized now that he has been trying to understand her in the wrong way— in the most erroneous way possible, and it was doing no good to himself at all.

︎ ︎ Because, why would she choose a naive boy like him in the first place? Why was he the center of her attention among all characters written in that novel? Why was he her favorite? There must be something that he simply missed and failed to embellish. There must be something he wasn't observing that made this entire response rather uncomfortable for him.

︎ ︎ Perhaps, it was time for him to get real— to see and grasp her authentic justifications.

︎ ︎ "I have one that my mom used to use." He disclosed despite not wanting to converse about this certain person with her. "Wait, give me a sec to get it from mom's room for you."

︎ ︎ So, she waited for minutes that seemed like an hour. That feeling of longing suddenly arose like the sun in the east for no reason at all. She felt too desolate just being with the notebook with its pen and the night and its warmth accompanying her. Maybe— just maybe, the stars and the sky could help. However, it did not. Now that Yerim thought about it, she would never really bring herself up to the situation of moonless heavens. Yet when he returned, uncovered by the spiteful skies, the seas arose as the levels of her serotonin did.

︎ ︎ "Here. It's a little old, though. Mother wasn't really fond of changing her phone. She thought it's a waste of money and carbon." Jungwon, who was worried she might not like this Nokia 6110, added a little disclaimer before handing it to her. Yerim was rather euphoric upon receiving this, especially when she heard about his mom and the mindset of hers mentioned by him as she began to scrutinize its features.

︎ ︎ "Damn, I love your mom." Spotting the power button, she nonchalantly pressed it, figuring that a pin was still required for her to access it. She immediately turned this information over to Jungwon, who was evidently waiting for this to happen as he leaned on the cemented veranda that was almost connecting both their balconies. It definitely wasn't the answer the man had expected.

︎ ︎ "Me too."

︎ ︎ He loved her more than anyone.

︎ ︎ A phone launched in the 90s was something Jungwon never expected Yerim would like. It aged even older than him, a few years older which his mom probably had used to be in contact with his father while they were merely lovers. Implying that this was that phone that shaped his parents' path in love, and his existence. If Yerim knew that, perhaps it pretty much explained why she loved it. The emotional attachment if she read that story could've been etched on her heart like her soul was carving her own sentiments upon it with a wood piece.

  "I wasn't expecting you'd like something like that old thing."

  "Are you kidding? In my universe, these types are almost hard to find." She said, long pressing what she knew was the power button.

︎ ︎ "Just type zero, four, zero, two, zero nine." He carefully dictated the numbers, still leaning on the railings, checking whether she typed them accurately.

︎ ︎ But if truth be told, Yerim knew nothing about Jungwon's mother. She simply loved the phone as she was taught to be a contentful daughter. No hard feelings, no emotional attachment to one's greatest tale of adoration.

︎ ︎ "Your birthdate, huh?"

︎ ︎ "Hm." Smiling absently, he retorted.

︎ ︎ "Oh, it's open. Thanks!"

︎ ︎ "No worries. Glad you like it."

︎ ︎ It was nine in the evening when peace was established among them for the first time.︎ ︎ They've had physical peace encounters in the past yet they didn't feature the mental beings of their own. That night, there were no more quarrels, no more shouting, no more downgrading each other. Just music, writing, and the crickets making the night a night with the moon guiding the earth as he looked at her with an avalanche of certainty.

︎ ︎ "Don't you ever miss your family, Yoo?" And as the sky was a mesmerizing view to see, Jungwon had his head upwards upon the query, his eyes beaming so much that Yerim almost believed he was one among the missing stars. Maybe, he was.

︎ ︎ It's been days now since Yerim was brought by the universal power of the invisible to a far, far away intergalactic voyage. It might be worth wondering as to why such a universe— or perhaps, an obscure being ever did all these to her (what for and how so), yet this question never occurred to her once. Not once— ever— if she had to be in all truth.

︎ ︎ Rather, she began asking herself questions like: how could they be doing right now? Do they ever miss me too? Are they worrying over the fact that I'm gone? Do they ever wonder where I've gone?

︎ ︎ "Which jerk wouldn't? They're everything to me." A breathy tone with sparkles embracing her corneas, the female responded, carefully placing the gadget right next to her notebook. She did not even bother to look at him in the eye when the other latter was all on her— mesmerized, glorified— as she knew that whatever was missing within her core could only be discovered among the stars. Among an expansive space of the universe where nothingness is embraced with configuring elements to grant its enchantment. "Do you?"

︎ ︎ But God, oh God. Better was what came to be when she finally decided to meet his galactic pools, filled with instances of bright city lights and the glorious scent of the moon.

︎ ︎ He was a better moon than what was above them.

︎ ︎ To this, his face dimmed, in all ways was it evident that there was no other way to word his response other than; "I do and I don't.".

︎ ︎ Jungwon looked away with the face he drew on himself. Smiley, but tragic. Laughing, but was hurting. He was smiling, but Yerim saw in his eyes that he wasn't. Yang Jungwon was like two people— two souls molded into a singular figure. They spoke different tones, in different languages, performed different arts of daily life, two different annotations of what they stood for.

︎ ︎ A tragic one, and a stubborn one.

︎ ︎ "Now, why are you looking at me like you aren't another person from another dimension who's desperate to save her favorite character and knows everything about him?" The stillness broke off at this lengthy remark, Yerim only squinting her eyes at the query that surely took a long time to be worded out.

︎ ︎ "The book never mentioned anything about your family." Going straight to the point, she said, vaguely giggling between words. "Perhaps, it's about time you tell me about them, Yang?"

︎ ︎ "And why would I?"

︎ ︎ "You know! There might be some stuff about your family that can help us in our mission." When in fact, Yerim merely yearned to listen to the male talk about his beloved ones. Maybe it could loosen up the weight of his mind at least a little bit— at least that's what she believed would relieve him, for that was what she would usually bring upon herself.

︎ ︎ It wasn't one solution for him, however. It wouldn't make everything worse as well. So what better way to talk it out to a girl whom he was sure could keep his secrets in a locker with decorations of stars and notes declaring her reliability?

︎ ︎ A locker to which only two of them have a key for?

︎ ︎ "Long story short; mom loved pretty much everything. She couldn't live a day without plants, without protesting against government policies that potentially harm the ecosystem, without a pen, and eventually ended up—well—dying, however. Dad.... couldn't live a day without being a jerk. Then there's me, the handsome, only product of that one night. The end!" Ringing through the evening gales even after the immediacy of five seconds, he words his family picture at such pace and sarcasm, eventually losing his smile to an eye roll after he realized he made the female latter laugh.

︎ ︎ "Handsome, huh?" In between her laughter, Yerim would utter. "Where's the lie, though?" As he was about to toss a palm unto her, the woman proceeded, the sole act halting him from doing so. "I never expected you'd be this gorgeous. I mean, I've only seen you through letters. I've only read descriptions about how you're like and shit like that. But when I saw your face for the first time ever?—" Yerim turned to Jungwon, their stares enthralling in an excellent full eclipse.

︎ ︎ "You're beyond compare to the words have ever pictured you to be."

︎ ︎ Underneath the sky of the murky blue, two essences had engaged in a uniting essence of words, uttering an entire sentence in unison. Acknowledging this, they have both broken off to their own junctures of laughter too.

︎ ︎ "I used to hear that a lot. From mom." Still smiling a natural smile, Jungwon bashfully stuck his eyes on the ground. "Now that I've found someone to use it on..."

︎ ︎ There was a strong force within Yerim's chest pulling and pushing itself back and forth with its own existence. She didn't know where it came from, she didn't know how it was formed, but she knew that the sooner she looked at the moon, her heartstrings were pulled. The beating sensation formed within her chest grew as she closed her eyes, repeating what Jungwon had said over and over in her just a while ago.

︎ ︎ "Lee Ahyoung? You've seen her?" Her eyes dashed open, towards Jungwon, who was gulping his smile away. Trailing the edges of the railings with his eyes, a giggle originated out of his mouth upon the sound of this. "I'm beyond glad you feel such a way about her! It can benefit you a lot, you know."

︎ ︎ Jungwon hasn't. Never once has he met Lee Ahyoung in his life, never once has he seen her face, never once has he heard her voice. Besides, he wouldn't care any less. He had long loved the serene life of stillness and video games, and there was no longer space within his heart for any aggravating romance.

  Until one certain day, that is.

"Mhm." He could only say to accompany his feeble smile, despite his disagreement with her statement internally.

︎ ︎ Because she was happy.

︎ ︎ And as long as she was,

︎ ︎ he'll forever be.

︎ ︎ "And you never told me anything about it!" Blurting out of the blue, Yoo Yerim smacked a palm against his shoulder, regardless of the distance covered between the two terraces.

︎ ︎ "Relax! It was only just a picture."

︎ ︎ "Just a picture? Damn, talk about a simp."

︎ ︎ "I'm not?"

︎ ︎ "How did you even get a picture of her?"

︎ ︎ Jungwon wavered to ponder. Not even in pictures has he seen her, thus, he only was there to think of a reasonable reply to cover up the lie that kept her smile still on her lips, longing for its longevity.

︎ ︎ "Remember when you told me about her dad being the CEO of something?" At last, he successfully failed the silence and broke it out of its own existence. "I searched for her dad's company online then eventually found a picture of her with her family."

  "Really?" Eyes wide open, she declared her need for assurance. Yerim then went forwards to have a better view of his laptop, which currently displayed a bunch of stats only musically-inclined people like him would understand. "Let me see, then! I've always been meaning to know how she looks like."

︎ ︎ Rapidly jerking his laptop from her sight, Yang Jungwon couldn't even look at her in the eye, merely sparing a gaze to the lampost a few inches right next to her while awkwardly beaming. "Lemme do it myself!" This was followed by a series of oddly satisfying clicks and clacks emitted by his typing, featuring little hisses formed from his mouth.

︎ ︎ As if paying attention to the device, Yerim waited there, silently admiring the man from not too far away as the edges of his lips drew crevices on themselves while his brows mimic a stone's nature.

︎ ︎ "Done?" Not moving a muscle other than those of her mouth and lips, Yoo Yerim jolted him from his personal commotion whilst he continued to cast typing blusters from his device. "Forget it. You never saw her, did you?"

︎ ︎ But when the relieved latter turned his laptop to her—

︎ ︎ Cat-like pair of eyes, a visual of pure maturity— she was exactly what the book defined.

︎ ︎ One thing; she was mesmerizing.

︎ ︎ Not mesmerizing as her, though.

︎ ︎ "I can't wait for you to meet her." His lips met the wind and that one bright smile once doused on it was completely eradicated at the company of the wind. He wanted it to stop. He wanted to turn off that laptop and toss it off the face of his household. Other than a wail of the little wrath he yearned to emit out of that, there was a soft emission of air from his mouth. The entire world was peering at him. Jungwon could not merely fail the world by dying to pour his own mornings upon the planet of emerald and sapphire. "Make her happy as she can be, yeah?" There, Yoo Yerim bothered to look at Yang Jungwon in the eye, beholding the galaxies within them.

︎ ︎ But it was otherwise unfair. He tried his very best to think of her, the her she wanted, but he can't.

︎ ︎ "Mhm." Was all he can enunciate amid that blurry despair.

︎ ︎ He did. But he can't. All he can ever think of was her.

︎ ︎ What about the earth?

︎ ︎ "Promise me, Yang?"

︎ ︎ He can't.

︎ ︎ "Yeah."

︎ ︎ Yerim grinned.

︎ ︎ "Good." Finally, to the heavens attached above, she gazed. "I'm glad you're up for this, after all, Sol."

Nabi's log! - Oct 26, 2022 10:15PM
i am writing this log the same day i
am uploading this chap but the date
written above was basically when i
actually finished writing the chapter 😭
damn that was over a year ago! (they
werent lying when they said love does
foolish shit to u in the span of those
months i fell in love, confessed, simped,
got my heart broken, wrote poetries,
dedicated songs, even attempted to
write a song gosh i cant do this again
pls save me i canf be inlvoe)
also, just a note that this chapter
is a flashback. 
Anyways, Sol, everyone :)